Harlet_Minx
Experienced
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2008
- Posts
- 80
Okay, I guess I'm posting this on one hand to see if I can find others in a similar position and on the other hand I want some advice, this is starting to really bother me.
Simply put, I crave pain, quite a bit of it actually. The problem is no matter what I've done it's never.... well it's never been enough and often leave a scene craving more. The thing is, I don't get any sexual or erotic enjoyment from it, the pain itself does nothing for me. Whats more, I don't actually feel the pain, well not as pain. I've tried everything from single tails, needles, electricity, CBT, gallons of hot wax, switches.... none of it... well, hurts.
I've started developing a extremely strong desire to push myself harder and harder with it too. However, let me just say now that I'm VERY conscientious about it and have strict rules about permanent harm or scarring (I scar extremely easily). I eventually went to a few therapists about it, apparently I'm mentally healthy but for some reason I dissociate myself from physical sensations. My body feels the pain or pleasure but I kind of don't know I'm feeling it. Meh, I'm not sure if this makes sense it's just that more recently I end up feeling unsatisfied and more frustrated with it.
I guess what I'm looking for is advice on how to manage my desire or find a way to not care. On the plus side, my enjoyment with BDSM solely focuses around the mental side, I get extremely strong erotic pleasure from my submission in a way I just simply don't get elsewhere. Anyways, any advice or insights would really be appreciated.
Simply put, I crave pain, quite a bit of it actually. The problem is no matter what I've done it's never.... well it's never been enough and often leave a scene craving more. The thing is, I don't get any sexual or erotic enjoyment from it, the pain itself does nothing for me. Whats more, I don't actually feel the pain, well not as pain. I've tried everything from single tails, needles, electricity, CBT, gallons of hot wax, switches.... none of it... well, hurts.
I've started developing a extremely strong desire to push myself harder and harder with it too. However, let me just say now that I'm VERY conscientious about it and have strict rules about permanent harm or scarring (I scar extremely easily). I eventually went to a few therapists about it, apparently I'm mentally healthy but for some reason I dissociate myself from physical sensations. My body feels the pain or pleasure but I kind of don't know I'm feeling it. Meh, I'm not sure if this makes sense it's just that more recently I end up feeling unsatisfied and more frustrated with it.
I guess what I'm looking for is advice on how to manage my desire or find a way to not care. On the plus side, my enjoyment with BDSM solely focuses around the mental side, I get extremely strong erotic pleasure from my submission in a way I just simply don't get elsewhere. Anyways, any advice or insights would really be appreciated.
