Unfortunately, we barely had the time to know ye.

[sweet soft kiss]

BBW ... It's so sad that a little one suffers... I feel so sorry for your friends...


Killswitch ... I hope your friends baby makes a full recovery...

I will be thinking good thoughts for all..

 

[cybergirly]

I don't have the words to express how sad this thread has made me. At the same time however it's made me realize how insignificant my own problems really are.

 

[His_sugar]

my son was born almost 8 weeks early and spent those weeks in the NICU. i was finally able to see him on day two after he was born. i wasn't able to touch him, hold him, feed him or give his precious face the sweet kisses i had been waiting for so long to caress his skin with. i sat next to his incubator all night, watching the nurses change shifts, crying. i saw babies come and go, healthy, happy and so big ( or they seemed to me ). After 8 weeks he was 4lbs 6oz and i was able to take him home. We were home 3 days and it was back into the Hospital for another week. He had a terrible little stomach and probably will have for a very long time. 10 days after his first arrival home, we left the Hospital again. Five days later the 9/11 tragedy happened and though we were so far away from the center of the events, i went to his crib that morning and scooped him up and held him all day. So scared that something could take him away from me so easily, without warning. i'm not sure i ever put him down for days after that, except to change him. Now, 20 months later he is walking a few steps, saying a few words and his smile that lights up my entire world.

My thoughts and prayers go out to anyone who has to suffer the loss of a child, regardless of the age. They are so precious, so fragile and yet, so strong..

 

[sweet soft kiss]

and it is a wonderful smile ...

 

[anniebug]

I lost my 5 yr old son to a brain tumor in 1993. He was diagnosed at 21 months of age and endured surgery, radiation, chemo and a stroke.

Losing him was the hardest thing I have ever had to endure and I grieve every day.

A parent should never have to bury a child.

 

[SuprSalor]

I lost my 5 yr old son to a brain tumor in 1993. He was diagnosed at 21 months of age and endured surgery, radiation, chemo and a stroke.

Losing him was the hardest thing I have ever had to endure and I grieve every day.

A parent should never have to bury a child.

I am so sorry for your loss. Hugs hon.

BBW, Give your friends a well wish from me.

I had to bury my first wife. Over 10 years of mental anguish...... God only knows if the kids had been in the car.....


Fuck. Sure makes it hard to believe in a benevolent God.

 

[anniebug]

An added note:

My husband (2nd) never knew my son, but I have talked with him about Alex frequently. He wrote this poem in his memory.

For The Death of a Child

I grieve with you

for the death of an adult
is the end of a life lived
filled with fulfilled promises
one way or another
that must be celebrated

but the death of a child
born or conceived
and carried
is the taking
of the promise
of a lifetime
and can only be grieved

his strength will be around you
and his spirit will return
herein you must never fail

I grieve with you

(c) MCD 1999

 

[hornylady]

Reading stories like these really make me realise what's important in life, and how lucky I am to have the family I have - my thoughts to all of you who are facing/have faced or who have to live with pain like this.

 

[brokenbrainwave]

From the mouth of babes

I apologize for bumping this thread. As stated earlier I know most use this place as a happy zone and would rather not see this sort of thing. However I can use this venue to vent, to question, to wonder.

Last night my wife was talking to the childs grandmother. When the conversation was relayed utter amazement was all I could feel. The grandmom is the only one this little boy will talk to, as in honest talk. He told his grandmother he knows he is going to die soon. He told his grandmother to take him shopping in order for him to purchase birthday and christmas gifts for his mommy, daddy, older brother. He also wanted cards to be given to them at the time of his death so while he still can, tell them each he is sorry for all the pain they are feeling. She had to hold the pen for this nine year old to write. The tumor has left him paralyzed on his left side. It took a bit of time for him to complete the task. He finished though, never shedding a tear, spelling out just what the three meant to him.

He told his grandmother he is soon going to be an angel. In my mind this child is already one, simply waiting upon his wings in which to fly from his personal hell. Soon to be free of this albatross quickly wrapping around his brain stem, sucking life from his limp frame.

Bound to a wheelchair he understands he is going to escape. Maybe not in the manner one would hope, but yet escape to spread his beyond years wisdom, comprehension, understanding. He has not been told of his acute condition, yet he knows. I may not agree in the way his mom and dad have kept just how dire his sickness is from him, however I cannot judge not sure how I would handle it if I were in the situation. That is how they've choosen to deal with their son, I will not fault them.

Irregardless he is at peace with his fate. Not giving up yet knowing the end of his story has been written. A tiny angel simply awaiting his wings.

I am not going to drudge up this thread for a daily update. I will use it for my thoughts, my sorrow when I feel the need.

 

[T.J. Jackson]

It's times like this that mere words do not seem adequate. That child is an angel already. I'm speechless.

 

[LilJadeWytch]

I am sorry for your pain

My prayers are with you. It's so easy to lose track of the important things in life - because of this thread, I remembered them today. Godbless~

 

[k¡tty]

No words can express my sympathy adequately.


I look into my sons big brown eyes, hug him tightly, kiss him softly and give thanks that he's in my life, everyday.

 

[Andreina]

I started to cry when i read this post - now I'm just utterly amazed how this boy deals with his situation. He seems to me to act in a manner that many adults surely wouldn't be able to.

my thoughts are with him and his family.

 

[Jimi]

Among the sadness, pain and suffering...

there often appears this delightful, God-given? innocence and peace - the actions of the Child.

Grief is for the healing of those left behind... not the most pleasant of processes, for it leaves us forever changed. I have been blessed, i suppose - grieving has given me a greater appreciation for my family & friends, and an ability to have "true" empathy for those within the experience.

NEVER apologize for sharing that grief here, BBW! You are indeed a fine Lit.izen, in whom many are pleased to share THEIR thoughts - let us support you at this time... PM's are welcomed by many... here also - if venting to another Dad helps!

That is what MANY of us are here for - to be part of our strange little Community.

Peace, Brotha Brainy!

 

[hornylady]

Re: From the mouth of babes

I am not going to drudge up this thread for a daily update. I will use it for my thoughts, my sorrow when I feel the need.

Anytime

 

[Cheyenne]

The grandmom is the only one this little boy will talk to, as in honest talk. He told his grandmother he knows he is going to die soon. He told his grandmother to take him shopping in order for him to purchase birthday and christmas gifts for his mommy, daddy, older brother. He also wanted cards to be given to them at the time of his death so while he still can, tell them each he is sorry for all the pain they are feeling.

I know you haven't asked for suggestions or discussion of the situation, but one thing hit me as I read the part above. Do the parents not know that their son realizes he will die? Maybe I misunderstood. But if the grandmother would tell them that the child knows, they might alter their treatment of him in his final days. Perhaps they, too, would like the chance to say good bye to their son/brother, but are holding back only because they don't want to tell him he will die. When they get his cards and gifts after he is gone, they might realize the opportunity they missed in not talking to him about the pending death while he was still alive. He may not be talking to them only because they aren't talking to him about that white elephant sitting in the middle of the living room?

 

[zipman]

My best friend's nephew was just disconnected from life support tonight. The poor little guy had liver cancer, and went through 2 transplants in the last month. He was almost three years old. No kid should have to go through that and no parents should have to bury their children.

I feel horrible for the family, as I have seen the toll that this has taken on everyone! It was obvious how painful it was for the parents to watch their son, hooked up to a thousand tubes and unable to do a thing to help him.

 

[brokenbrainwave]

1994-2003. May your soul R.I.P for eternity

This morning somewhere over Texas a family is gathering, or has gathered to lean on each other for support. A mom and dad are picking out what pillow covering their son will sleep forever in. A big brother is possibly thinking of the times he was perhaps a bit to mean, or of the times his younger sibling got him into undue trouble and longing for one more time to hear "Mommy! Guess what Nick did!!!"

Other than the first, I am taking a guess at what is going on. What I know for all certainty is transpiring is that somewhere over that vast land a all to tiny soul was released Saturday, freed from the shackles the chains that bound him to a wheelchair. Freed to soar throughout the heavens, to romp in the clouds, to play with the many others gone before. Freed from his pain, his albatross, the sickness that took his all to short life. In the end, in the physical the tumor won. However one must look past the person. This body we hold is merely a casing. A shell that traps our thoughts, our feelings, and yes our souls. I am not speaking in religious terms of a soul that is either going to heaven or hell. I am not sure either exsists.

I do feel we have a soul. We have what makes us, well us. To many times people have mentioned I am my great grandfather remade, that Fuzzy's soul was inherited by me. Same demeanor, same looks, same thinking process. It is not something tangible, this soul. We cannot see it, smell it, touch it. But for most of us we sense it is there. To those whom do not believe this, all is well. You have your beliefs I have mine and we shall break bread on this topic another time, another place.

As strange as it sounds, even though my wifes best friend for over thirty years just had a son pass, I feel the child won. This tumor only took his life, it did not take his spirit. They only have his physical presense to miss, they will always have his spiritual presence among them. He won, he overcome. Not in the way of a miracle, a healing, whatnot, but he won. His loving kind carring nature was there to the end. That bastard disease never broke him. It merely took his person. To the very end, he was a trooper, and to my utter amazement had his loved ones on his mind.

Mom and dad were by his side. They knew it is going to happen. His brother knew also and being just a child of 11 himself, did not want to be there. He left the earthly world looking upon the face of his loving parents. I am sure there were tears, God knows I shed them when told, I am just as sure his spirit will decend upon them to calm, heal, and comfort. Maybe it will be in the form of something they see or hear. It might be something as simple as a cloud or a vision of his smile. Perhaps it will be a favorite memory just as they think they cannot trudge on anymore with the pain. As I said before, that bastard tumor only took his life, it did not win for he would not let it take his soul.

Gods speed young ladd. Thank you for the time you shared with my sons. Thank you for the hope you have shown until the end. Thank you for the way you made me look at things a little differently now. Once again ladd, you won. R.I.P.

 

[Andreina]

amen.

 

[bluespoke]

You said it all BBW

 

[PepperminTrish]

*hugs*

 

[JazzManJim]

My deepest condolences to the family, BBW.

There is so much of life which is completely utterly out of our control which is why we have to love as hard as we can, live as much as we can, and never ever take a moment shared with those we love for granted.

 

[ohblueyedlady]

I feel for you, brokenbrainwave...I feel for his family...I feel for everyone who will never know his bright spot of hope.

Everything this little boy was, every smile, every laugh, will always be in the hearts of his parents and brother and all who came in contact with him.

He will always be there with them, in the way they love and touch one another and in the way they laugh and reach out their hands to strangers.

I'm so very sorry.

 

[Cardelia]

A Moment of Silence

and all I can ever hope is that his laughter will ring out when he's in heaven and we will all pause when we hear it to stop & smile and hug someone.

I fear I've said what I mean badly.


My deepest sympathy.

 

[hornylady]

My thoughts