Training to cum on command

[FungiUg]

Okay, I mentioned this in another post, but I thought I might get a response by creating a separate thread.

Has anyone had any experience with training someone to cum on command, or being trained to do so?

What was involved? What worked, what didn't?

While I have my own ideas, I haven't actually done this (yet), but I would dearly love to hear other people's experiences.

 

[NemoAlia]

I find that being expected to cum makes it a lot harder for me to have an orgasm. But ten points to the person who can pull it off!

If you figure out how to do this, I'll be the first to buy your book.

 

[FungiUg]

Damn, I hafta write a book?!!!

*pouts big time*

 

[Pixie Mischief]

BF pretty much cums on comand but I have no idea how he accomplishes it. he cums within a minute of my ending my story. I didnt realize he waited till I said to cum he ended up tearing his cock. 2 hours of none stop jerkin off LMAO
I cried and cried. anyway we have trouble with me cumming so I'm not really aloud to masterbate anymore. So that I'll be more sensitive and not desentized. if I do everyday it can get to my taking 2 hours.
I have trouble cumming when it involves someone else. so even if I dont masterbate anymore like I use to. I still have trouble. At least I do with him now LOL
GRrr its been 9 days almost me going crazy.. LOL
but as for the answer I have no idea how he can cum within a minute of my saying to cum. in my stories. I have NO idea.
as for me he says I need to learn to chil and let go

 

[Pixie Mischief]

I find that being expected to cum makes it a lot harder for me to have an orgasm. But ten points to the person who can pull it off!

If you figure out how to do this, I'll be the first to buy your book.

thats excatly my problem he says I need to learn to let go. we are working on it.

him going "I want you to cum for me" just DOESNT help LOL

 

[James G 5]

This can cause problems
I know subs who've been "command trained" who find themsleves UNABLE to cum if they leave the Dominant who trained them
They have to be "reporgammed" to be able to cum again

(these have all been female subs, don't know if it happens to men too)

 

[Justina123]

Skepticism here...

I have to admit to a certain amount of skepticism. I know one D/s couple where He will tell her to cum, sometimes just when doing something completely nonsexual like cooking dinner or whatever, and she does.... have to admit, I am a skeptic here. It's so much easier for women than men to fake this.

I think it is a lot easier to hold off an impending orgasm by mental will power (or of course cessation of physical sensations) than it is to have one "on command." Sometimes when we are playing Sir will tell me to cum, and whether I am able to obey generally depends on the circumstances... He usually does it when He senses that I am not completely letting things flow or not totally relaxed, and then his command will often work as for me, just blocking out all thoughts, everything but what I am feeling, IF there is lots of physical play going on, will generally bring me to orgasm. But an orgasm on verbal command alone? Definitely not me, and I have to admit, I am a skeptic....


- justina

 

[white_mage_goddess]

I can't cum on command while doing something just totally nonsexual, but once I'm fairly aroused I have no problem "pushing myself" into an orgasm when he tells me too.

Of course I orgasm really easy anyway, sometimes from hardly any direct stimulation at all. I'm not really sure how I do it. Maybe it has something to do with him teaching me to hold off my orgasms for extended periods of time...I just seem to have pretty good control over them now.

 

[AnelizeDarkEyes]

An Interesting Essay on the Subject

I've found the subject fascinating, and liked this essay from CastleRealm quite a bit. Haven't tried it, but wouldn't be adverse to the idea with the right Dom. Although...James G5 has a good point. Hmmmm.


Essay on Release Training from CastleRealm


Anelize

 

[James G 5]

Re: An Interesting Essay on the Subject

I've found the subject fascinating, and liked this essay from CastleRealm quite a bit. Haven't tried it, but wouldn't be adverse to the idea with the right Dom. Although...James G5 has a good point. Hmmmm.

Yes I do
And I make valid assertions as well

FYI for the doubters......this won't work for EVERYONE
But the process is a combination of Pavlovian reaction training & hypnotic suggestion

For some people it can set them up to cum on command when stimulated, like an enhanced version of what Justina mentioned

For others it can help them overcome difficulties orgasaming during foreplay.......it's not an EARTH shaking orgasm, but it happens

As for the non-sex orgasm on command situations, for some people who're very reactive it CAN work.....The woman in question might not have a hard orgasm, but at least the mental feelings of release one brings.....and in some cases if she's keyed up right, she migth soak her panties

As I said, it might not work for everyone
But when it does work, it can WORK

Beware the hazards tho

 

[tendril]

I find that being expected to cum makes it a lot harder for me to have an orgasm. But ten points to the person who can pull it off!

If you figure out how to do this, I'll be the first to buy your book.

Yes and what a bestseller that would be.

 

[Desdemona]

I am posting this at the direction of my Dominant, SnoozeButton.

He has trained me to cum on command and my training is ongoing. He started it with phone sex. As I would become increasingly aroused, He would tell me to cum. Over time, it took less and less stimulus for me to reach orgasm. At this point, I don't have to be aroused for it to work. The other day, with no warning, He called me and the only word I heard was "Cum".

He also has me cum on command when we are together. Sometimes He just holds me and looks in my eyes as He talks me through it. It may occur while we're in a scene or just while we're lying in bed together. Other times, the command may be whispered in my ear while we're out in public. I never know when or if I will hear those words from Him.

It never fails to work. The orgasms aren't generally as intense as those derived from physical stimulation at this point. I understand from a couple of other subs that their orgasms increased in intensity over time. I suspect I will find that to be true for me as well.

My pleasure belongs to Him.

 

[kayte]

I am posting this at the direction of my Master, SnoozeButton!!!

Hi sis !!! Nice to see you !!!


SB Sir has me trained to cum on command and to stop immediately when He so commands.

It did start with phone sex, and when I got close and told Him, He would tell me to cum. As time went on the tone of His voice was enough to get me very aroused and then pretty soon it was just His voice. Then it was making me wait to cum. Having me so hot and so close, and making me hold it there before permitting me to cum.

I do remember the first time I met Him, was in a restaraunt and there was another person there too. She went off to the ladies room, He leaned down and whispered in my ear, the magic word 'cum'. And I did, I know I grabbed His arm and leaned against Him covering my mouth as I have been known to be loud. When our friend got back, she just thought it was some 'affection' being shown. He then told her what I had just done under His control.

The sound of His voice is so ingrained in me with that word and what it means, that there have been moments of an unintentional episode. The word 'come' sounds the same. And that word is commonly used in conversation. That will and has gotten me started. He just laughs.

The intensity of the orgasms vary. If I have not heard from Him or been given permission to play it can exceedingly intense just hearing His voice and command. When I do play, with His permission I have found I have to bring the sound of His voice to the forefront of my brain to even cum then. I don't think I can cum without His permission and without the memory of the sound of His command.

The orgasms have increased in intensity and variety with time. I am sure they will continue to do so.

Of course the most intense ones are when I am fortunate enough to be in His presence, as He looks in my eyes, and He says, "Why don't you cum for Me?"

My pleasure as well as all of me, belongs to Him.

 

[slvjenn]

This has kind of been a fantasy of mine since i first heard of people doing it.

BF and I have been trying it for a long time and i've yet to be able to do it in a non-sexual situation.

However, in a sexual situation I can pretty much do it when he says to.

What we did was this...

During sexual play when he'd see I was nearing orgasm, he'd deny it from me. I guess kind of like a roll reversal since in vanilla relationships I was always the one telling the guy not to cum yet

Anyway, after a time he'd tell me that he was going to count down from 10 and for me to cum when he reached 1. He'd then begin to count down slowly. When he reached one, nearly every time I was able to have an orgasm.

As time went on, instead of counting down from 10, he'd count down from 7 and 5, and 3. Now he doesn't count, just tells me to cum.

We've tried the same approach without any physical stimulation without success. I wish we could, because it just seems like it would be such a fun thing to have him tell me to have an orgasm as we walked down the street and it actually happened. Maybe someday

 

[dragonlace]

I am being trained to cum on command as well.....it works as soon as He says to my body reacts....its not as intense unless i am worked up and or physically stimulated and it builds exponentially. Over time it is getting more and more intense and its kind of a different orgasm for me anyway. Its more prolonged and less intense than orgasms i have had in the past but i can also have multiple intense orgasms throughout each session. The only drawback is that if I go for too long i cramp up and it becomes kinda painful also.

I also find that i can cum on command easier if it is denied. Prolonged denial makes release easier but that is usually an intense orgasm that i cannot prolong for a period of time. Sometimes its also hard for me to hold onto it and prolong it...my body reacts too quickly with a small orgasm that makes me excited and feverish but then it takes me longer to build it up to what He wants. Sort of like a spasm, very short and intense.

I cannot wait until the day comes when i can have intense multiples at just His word or at just a touch or at a look. As it is when I hear His voice my body immediately goes into overdrive so its hard not to be overcome by it.

 

[sweetnpetite]

I am very interested in this topic. I have printed up the Release Training article, and I will be following this thread. I guess maybe I'm so interested because I have such a hard time having an orgasm during intercourse. I can do it, but it just takes a long time- even from the point where I feel I'm close, right on the edge. I don't really understand this because I have no problem masterbating, exploring my body, ect, all the stuff the sex therapeist recomend.



On the one hand, I think its possible that my partner is not receptive enough to my signals, but I don't know how to fix this, because telling him that would likely produce a defensive response and maybe even a sexual freeze-out. Any suggestions on how to explain tactfully to a man that does not take direction that women sometimes *need* things just so in order to climax? It seems like if I get upset because he won't do what I want he acts like I'm just selfish and bossy. I'm frustrated, and off topic!!!!

 

[Quint]

We used to do more with the count-down, which worked well for awhile but suddenly didn't, and I got frustrated and depressed and we stayed away from it for several weeks. The other day he brought it back and it worked marvelously; I wasn't feeling ready to come until he started counting, and then it took less than 20. I am hoping to make this sort of training consistent, to the point where I only come after being counted down, and hopefully reducing the numbers as well. That's the most I'm ever going to hope for--"finicky" doesn't even come close to describing my orgasmability!

 

[FungiUg]

Well, I had huge amounts of success with it. I started with the counting down while close to orgasm, and then reduced the count, reduced the prior stimulation. Now I have her at the point where I can even tell her to cum on IM, and she does (although she tells me she hears my voice in her head when I do that, so it's still a voice association.)

So yes, with the right person, it works, and works well.

 

[FungiUg]

I think its possible that my partner is not receptive enough to my signals, but I don't know how to fix this, because telling him that would likely produce a defensive response and maybe even a sexual freeze-out. Any suggestions on how to explain tactfully to a man that does not take direction that women sometimes *need* things just so in order to climax? It seems like if I get upset because he won't do what I want he acts like I'm just selfish and bossy.

Tricky. It sounds like a lot of this is to do about the personality and sexual style of your lover, and those are hard things to change.

I know I like to spend time experimenting with lovers, just making the cum over and over for extended periods of time. (For this reason I prefer multi-orgasmic women as lovers.)

I can't understand the mentality of someone who's not dead keen on making their lover cum as part of sex. So... I'm really at a loss of what to recommend.

 

[Pixie]

Here's another link on "Orgasm on Command"

 

[Bachlum Chaam]

I have always wanted this power over my lady I am now starting to try it and I have no doubt she will get there in the end

 

[FungiUg]

I have always wanted this power over my lady I am now starting to try it and I have no doubt she will get there in the end

Cool! Hope it works well for you.

It does take a lot of trust, because essentially the woman (or man for that matter, if you're Eb) is giving up control of part of her physical self.

Also, for those women who aren't easily orgasmic and require much physical stimulation, it'd probably be just frustrating. Of course, that's not necessarily a bad thing...

 

[SierraMoon]

i was trained to cum on command over the phone... it took a lot of time, and frustration (on my part) but i did finally achieve it. As a lot of others have said, denial makes it much easier in the end.... He would threaten to hang up the phone, if i didn't cum when he told me to, and would count down from 15.... by 8 usually, i was a shaking mess... Add to that, the fact that he also trained me to cum without touching myself... what a rush!!! It was all totally mind control... He seemed to be inside me, causing my body to do things that i had no idea i could.... He's awesome!!!

 

[snoozebutton]

I just want to say how proud Kayte, Desdemona and Dragonlace make me when they release on command. I cherish the gift each has given me.

 

[PinkOrchid]

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