This probably

[DeYaKen]

been misunderstood some where.
I love my wife and do everything I can for her from rubbing her belly to just lying in bed and holding her.
I haven't said anything to her about the thoughts I've had that put the blame on her. All the negative thoughts and emotions are within my head.
I can't help that I still desire my wife as much as I ever have or that my sex drive hasn't diminished like hers has. I can't help it that she's the woman in all of my erotic dreams which have increased since our sex life has decreased. I can't help it if her body still causes me to get erections at inappropriate times.
I love her and want her as much as I ever have and if I'm wrong for getting frustrated and angry sometimes then I'll be in the wrong.
She does do as much as she's able to help me from being more frustrated that I already am.
Sex had always been a big part of our lives together and now it's not. I know that it's not anybody's fault that it's not the same and will not get better, but that doesn't change the way I feel or ease the pain of rejection when I try to initiate sex and she refuses me. That very seldom happened in the past but has become the norm and it hurts.
Holding each other, touching each other, kissing each other while we laid in bed together almost always ended up with us having sex in the past.
I did talk to my doctor about the stress I'm feeling in a general way and she gave me some brochures for counselors that I should be able to afford to see and I'm seriously thinking about calling a couple of them, but I'm a little scared and embarrassed by the thought.
I don't think I'm being a narcissist or a self absorbed idiot. I'm a man struggling with what in my opinion is a loss who reached out.
I see that this wasn't the place for that now.

For what it's worth I can understand that you get angry. I get angry when my wife or children are ill. They can't help being ill and I've agonised about why it makes me angry. I came to the conclusion that it was being powerless to do anything about it that got to me. I'm used to fixing things, and pretty damn good at it, but when confronted with something that really matters to me, I'm powerless. I have to try to control myself and focus on doing what I can. What it must be like to handle that long term, I can't imagine.

My daughter in law suffers from Crohns, so my son may have to deal with this at some time.

 

[Edward Teach]

We could go on spitting at each other like this--if I cared what you think--which I don't.

The fact is that I gave a bit of sympathy and advice to the OP before you posted that I didn't, while you just gave him obnoxious shit. And now you're trying to backpedal on your miscue. The rest of what you are posting now is just diversionary flak.

... I think the best response to it is either to do what MistressLynn did here or just to butt out of the thread altogether and hope it just stops without getting "oh gawd."

If you don't care what I think, then why don't you take your own advice and "butt out of the thread?"

I have been very consistent in what I have said. As usual, you keep trying to obfuscate.

As I've said over and over, you think that by twisting facts and getting the last word makes you a winner. I don't think you CAN "butt out," plt. I don't think you can help it. What Does The Fox Say

 

[THROBBS]

OMG. Get a ship!

 

[Edward Teach]

OMG. Get a ship!

Jump on in there Rhinoman. He needs some help.

 

[THROBBS]

That's why I suggested support groups. They are usually run by a therapist, but because there are more people to pay his salary joining is often cheap or even free.

True.

Though there are the "hurdles": finding a local support group, "clicking" with the group, finding the "time" (sadly, it isn't "just" a matter of making it a priority, as folk often, glibly suggest).

Venting here probably seemed like a reasonable 1st (2nd or 3rd it seems) step.

Then one must filter the rubbish and glean the useful (there usually is some).


If only one could simply get hugs from a pirate.

 

[THROBBS]

Jump on in there Rhinoman. He needs some help.

Don't we all?

 

[sr71plt]

If you don't care what I think, then why don't you take your own advice and "butt out of the thread?"

Well, because, contrary to your desires, this thread isn't all about you. (Sometimes it's just too easy. )

Just keep trying to pile dirt over your mistake, don't you, jerk?

 

[Edward Teach]

Well, because, contrary to your desires, this thread isn't all about you. (Sometimes it's just too easy. )

Just keep trying to pile dirt over your mistake, don't you, jerk?

You really can't help it can you.