woodnymph_O
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Nov 18, 2004
- Posts
- 976
cloudy
my printer resents your humor,for making it work so much
nymphy
my printer resents your humor,for making it work so much
nymphy
Things you'd love to actually say at work
- Thread starter cloudy
- Start date
Svenskaflicka
Fountain
- Joined
- Jun 9, 2002
- Posts
- 16,142
minsue said:I'd say see above, but I don't know how well it would translate.
M and I have an expression dating back from when we were 14:
"Varsåkåt." -"Task så mycket."
Sounds similiar to the traditional
"Varsågod." -"Tack så mycket."
meaning "Here you are" - "Thank you very much"
BUT literally meaning
"Be so horny." -"Dick so much."
Hey, we came up with it when we were 14...
Svenskaflicka
Fountain
- Joined
- Jun 9, 2002
- Posts
- 16,142
No, no, no, MLyons!
We're discussing what we'd like to say in a BAD way!
We're discussing what we'd like to say in a BAD way!
curious2c
In Flux
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2002
- Posts
- 19,254
Heh...I get to spout off once in a while...and get away with it. One time I came very close though...too close.
It all started with a phone message on my home phone the afternoon of the morning I flew off to work.
A female's voice...that my wife was much curious about.
"Dave, it's between you and ______"
and that was it. A woman calling up my house with that message...needless to say when I got to work and called home to let the wife know...I got the grilling of a lifetime.
"Some chicka called and said that it's between you and ______. What's between you and ______? Is there something that you want to tell me about this chicka?"
Then, the next morning, I got up to the mill and the new manager walks into our department morning toolbox meeting.
"Dave, did y ou get my message?"
"Oh...you must have been the chikca that called my house yesterday then?"
"CHICKA?"
"Yeah...chicka. My wife was a bit upset. wanted to know why some chicka called and would just say that it was between me and _______ ."
"CHICKA?"
"Yeah...chicka. You must have been the chicka. What is between me an ______ then?"
"CHICKA!?"
It was then that I realized that she was mad...at me. I just smiled...and replied...
"YOU called my home and left this message...Dave, it's between you and ______. My wife wanted to know what was between us...were you pregnant or what? You see, you put me in a spot...and she was the one that referred to you as some chicka anyway."
She turned and left.
Everyone was speechless at my calling her 'chicka'. I didn't care at the moment, had she known what I'd gone through with my wife.
What was between me a _____ was a trip...and I 'won'.
Of course...my wife had a hard time with that whole message. If she knew that the one that left that message was as goodlooking as she was...I'd have probably been in divorce court.
My favorite though...
"You did it just like I told you too!"
"Yep...even though I knew it wouldn't work too. You should be proud of me...boss."
It all started with a phone message on my home phone the afternoon of the morning I flew off to work.
A female's voice...that my wife was much curious about.
"Dave, it's between you and ______"
and that was it. A woman calling up my house with that message...needless to say when I got to work and called home to let the wife know...I got the grilling of a lifetime.
"Some chicka called and said that it's between you and ______. What's between you and ______? Is there something that you want to tell me about this chicka?"
Then, the next morning, I got up to the mill and the new manager walks into our department morning toolbox meeting.
"Dave, did y ou get my message?"
"Oh...you must have been the chikca that called my house yesterday then?"
"CHICKA?"
"Yeah...chicka. My wife was a bit upset. wanted to know why some chicka called and would just say that it was between me and _______ ."
"CHICKA?"
"Yeah...chicka. You must have been the chicka. What is between me an ______ then?"
"CHICKA!?"
It was then that I realized that she was mad...at me. I just smiled...and replied...
"YOU called my home and left this message...Dave, it's between you and ______. My wife wanted to know what was between us...were you pregnant or what? You see, you put me in a spot...and she was the one that referred to you as some chicka anyway."
She turned and left.
Everyone was speechless at my calling her 'chicka'. I didn't care at the moment, had she known what I'd gone through with my wife.
What was between me a _____ was a trip...and I 'won'.
Of course...my wife had a hard time with that whole message. If she knew that the one that left that message was as goodlooking as she was...I'd have probably been in divorce court.
My favorite though...
"You did it just like I told you too!"
"Yep...even though I knew it wouldn't work too. You should be proud of me...boss."
CharleyH
Curioser and curiouser
- Joined
- May 7, 2003
- Posts
- 16,771
cloudy said:Nicked these from another board I post in occasionally - they were too good not to share (the ones in bold are my personal favorites). Feel free to add your own
1. "I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit."
2. "I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce."
3. "How about never? Is never good for you?"
4. "I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public."
5. "I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way."
6. "I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter."
7. "I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message."
8. "I don't work here. I'm a consultant."
9. "It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're saying."
10. "Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again."
11. "I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid."
12. "You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers."
13. "I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn."
14. "I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth."
15. "I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you."
16. "Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view."
17. "The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist."
18. "Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental."
19. "What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?"
20. "I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant."
21. "It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off."
22. "Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial."
23. "And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?"
24. "Do I look like a people person?"
25. "This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting."
26. "I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left."
27. "Sarcasm is just one more service we offer."
28. "If I throw a stick, will you leave?"
29. "Errors have been made. Others will be blamed."
30. "Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed."
31. "I'm trying to imagine you with a personality."
32. "A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door."
33. "Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?"
34. "Too many freaks, not enough circuses."
35. "Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?"
36. "Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done."
37. "How do I set a laser printer to stun?"
38. "I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted a salary."
39. "Who lit the fuse on your tampon?"
40. "Oh I get it... like humour... but different!"
Funny, Cloudy. But where is "Oh god! Why don't you just fuck off?"
that was my personal fave to boss's, hence freelance . . . :|
