The strange case of riff's missing artificial vagina.

[riff]

I found it! I found it! I mean her, "Lucy."

It was in a drawer of a dresser that I seldom use. I was hiding it there and forgot where I had put her!

Tonight, on my way home from the Russian club I am gonna stop by Rite Aide and buy a big bottle of Astroglide and I am gonna watch some pornovideo and I am gonna get my rocks off good.

Hmmmmm..... who shall I be fucking when I close my eyes? Some euroslut? A pornstar? Or.... who knows.... it might even be you.

 

[Ginny]

laughing hard.....but omg....also twitching....that is so fucking hot thinking about you fucking that plastic pussy thang...jesus.......i've seen a pics (not of you....at least i don't think) of guys using one....and that is one hot lil contraption....

lube it up good and go to town! omg....hot flashes of your ass clenching as you stroke into it...porno going....mmmm your face.....

okay....it's 5....and i'm perving on you bigtime....i better head home....

night riff! enjoy your reunion with that yummy thang....

 

[Rubyfruit]

I'm curious, riff. Does an artificial pussy feel better than just your hand?

 

[T.H. Oughts]

LMAO... hey I didn't see this thread until I had posted my one, lol

I saw you talking fake pussy in another thread, lol

Opps

 

[riff]

I'm curious, riff. Does an artificial pussy feel better than just your hand?

YES. Soak it in the sink with hot water. It retains heat very well. Lube it up and go. MUCH MUCH BETTER THAN YOUR HAND.

You can even stick it beneath the keyboard and fuck it standing up while you run a pornoscreen show or have some slut on the internet fuck you... LOL

I didn't mean to call you a slut, but if you like it, I will. hehehehe

I'm not ashamed about sex. I am not ashamed about it at all. I just like to fuck and if I can't have the real thing, then I am gonna do it myself.

 

[lavender]

 

[Rubyfruit]

Hey, if it feels good, I say go for it.

I don't really see why sex toys for men are any sillier than sex toys for women.

So, riff, is it tight enough?

 

[riff]

At first it was too tight. I had a hell of a time getting Champ into it. But I busted the opening a little bit... it split and now I slide right on it. Tightness can be controlled with pressure from the hand holding it. I am sure they have some with some kind of air pump system to adjust tightness, but I am perfectly happy with Lucy as she is.

No, I can't relate to her or be intimate with her. She's just an artificial vagina. But hey, I don't open my heart to my hand either.

They rock. Go buy one for a guy friend who is single. Include some lube too. Tell him to warm it up. I can almost bet you he'll give it a whirl even though he won't admit it, and he's gonna wind up fucking the shit out of it. If ever Lucy gives out on me, I'll get another.

Maybe I should try phone sex with someone, she has her dildo and I have Lucy. Could be fun, I think.

 

[Rubyfruit]

I forgot to add riff, that I'd be your internet slut, but I'm one of those fat bitches.

I love phone sex while riding my Sybian. Love it.

 

[riff]

I forgot to add riff, that I'd be your internet slut, but I'm one of those fat bitches.

I love phone sex while riding my Sybian. Love it.

Oooo... Ruby..... you just want to fuck me with a strap on dildo.... hehehehehe

 

[riff]

Why is it odd for men to have artificial vaginas? Most of us chicas have artificial cocks. Why is there such great difference?

Thank you so much, lavy-love. You may live in Texas, but I always thought there was something right about you.

Oops... I mean "left".....

 

[T.H. Oughts]

Oooo... Ruby..... you just want to fuck me with a strap on dildo.... hehehehehe

Someone mention a Strapon Can I bring popcorn, coke and watch?

 

[Rubyfruit]

Oooo... Ruby..... you just want to fuck me with a strap on dildo.... hehehehehe

Bend over cowboy because this girl feels like taking you for a ride.

 

[riff]

Bend over cowboy because this girl feels like taking you for a ride.

Well, at 1000 posts, I was spurned by Killermuffin and juicylips fucked my cherry ass with a strap on.

At 2000, TN_Vixen pussied out and I was left fingering myself.

At 3000, you can fuck my ass with a strap-on. I'll lie on my back and suck your huge knockers while you pump me good.

You are a fat bitch? Hey, I am only 5'7" tall/short... u know what I mean.

 

[Rubyfruit]

I like people in all shapes, sizes and colors, Riff.

 

[riff]

Yeah, I guess I am an equal opportunity slut myself.

I gotta go to Russian meeting now! See yA!

riffers

 

[Ginny]

You can even stick it beneath the keyboard and fuck it standing up while you run a pornoscreen show....

damnnnn....yumm....have you ever run across any movie clips online of guys fucking their plastic pussy thangs?....i'm gonna check google....i might have to get turtle one for his easter basket....

 

[Aphrodisiac]

Woo hoo !!!

riff,

I was wondering when you would find your "Lucy".

I am glad you finally found her -- the mystery is solved !


Rock on' - have lots fun !!!!!

 

[Adoratrice]

We own two of them..I say we because I love to use them on him.....I love watching him enjoy himself...I love sucking just the head of his cock while I give him a hand/toy job.


Ours don't have names.