The Safe Haven
- Thread starter Spicy Southern Belle
- Start date
sereneone4u
quod nutrit me destruit
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2006
- Posts
- 52,079
Last night/morning, I could not keep it inside anymore
so I went downstairs to where my husband was at the computer...(he just came back from two weeks in Tenn...he is now in FL)
to be fair it was a work project not Command and Conquer for once...
anyways, I came back upstairs and got back in bed and just played my Ipod trying to go to sleep...
He came upstairs and asked what was the matter, he could sense something was up...
and I just broke down and cried so hard, I physically shook...like for about an hour...
and yes, he held me...he knew it was because of Emily...and when I finished crying, we talked about her.
I never knew he did not get to see her with her eyes open. I did. She was the first one out and I think her Apgar was like 2 or 3...and they had to get her breathing and my pastor baptized her...they where working on getting her sister out and brought her to me bundled up...you ever see a cancer patient in the last stages? How you can see and smell death from them? She had death in her sweet little eyes...I told her I loved her and how beautiful she was and they whisked her way and her sister was being baptized.
She died while they were sewing me up...but she was with my husband in his arms...from her earthly father to her heavenly one she flew...but her eyes where closed although she was still breathing...and I did not know that until last night...when I finally was brought to her I was able to hold her until she grew cold...
I am thankful I was able to look her in her eyes and tell her how beautiful she was and is and that I love her. I am also thankful that she was surrounded by love as she passed and took it with her.
so I went downstairs to where my husband was at the computer...(he just came back from two weeks in Tenn...he is now in FL)
to be fair it was a work project not Command and Conquer for once...
anyways, I came back upstairs and got back in bed and just played my Ipod trying to go to sleep...
He came upstairs and asked what was the matter, he could sense something was up...
and I just broke down and cried so hard, I physically shook...like for about an hour...
and yes, he held me...he knew it was because of Emily...and when I finished crying, we talked about her.
I never knew he did not get to see her with her eyes open. I did. She was the first one out and I think her Apgar was like 2 or 3...and they had to get her breathing and my pastor baptized her...they where working on getting her sister out and brought her to me bundled up...you ever see a cancer patient in the last stages? How you can see and smell death from them? She had death in her sweet little eyes...I told her I loved her and how beautiful she was and they whisked her way and her sister was being baptized.
She died while they were sewing me up...but she was with my husband in his arms...from her earthly father to her heavenly one she flew...but her eyes where closed although she was still breathing...and I did not know that until last night...when I finally was brought to her I was able to hold her until she grew cold...
I am thankful I was able to look her in her eyes and tell her how beautiful she was and is and that I love her. I am also thankful that she was surrounded by love as she passed and took it with her.
VelvetWolf
Experienced
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2011
- Posts
- 77
Last night/morning, I could not keep it inside anymore
so I went downstairs to where my husband was at the computer...(he just came back from two weeks in Tenn...he is now in FL)
to be fair it was a work project not Command and Conquer for once...
anyways, I came back upstairs and got back in bed and just played my Ipod trying to go to sleep...
He came upstairs and asked what was the matter, he could sense something was up...
and I just broke down and cried so hard, I physically shook...like for about an hour...
and yes, he held me...he knew it was because of Emily...and when I finished crying, we talked about her.
I never knew he did not get to see her with her eyes open. I did. She was the first one out and I think her Apgar was like 2 or 3...and they had to get her breathing and my pastor baptized her...they where working on getting her sister out and brought her to me bundled up...you ever see a cancer patient in the last stages? How you can see and smell death from them? She had death in her sweet little eyes...I told her I loved her and how beautiful she was and they whisked her way and her sister was being baptized.
She died while they were sewing me up...but she was with my husband in his arms...from her earthly father to her heavenly one she flew...but her eyes where closed although she was still breathing...and I did not know that until last night...when I finally was brought to her I was able to hold her until she grew cold...
I am thankful I was able to look her in her eyes and tell her how beautiful she was and is and that I love her. I am also thankful that she was surrounded by love as she passed and took it with her.
There are no words from a stranger that can make this heartbreak better. Just know my thoughts and prayers are with you and your husband. *hugs*
Last edited:
T
thesweetsweetness
Guest
((HUGS))
I sat here for a while after reading your post, searching for the words to say to you, your husband and family. Nothing I can think of feels right to say. So know I am thinking of you, sending hugs.
Spicy Southern Belle
A Touch of Spice
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2004
- Posts
- 12,222
Last night/morning, I could not keep it inside anymore
so I went downstairs to where my husband was at the computer...(he just came back from two weeks in Tenn...he is now in FL)
to be fair it was a work project not Command and Conquer for once...
anyways, I came back upstairs and got back in bed and just played my Ipod trying to go to sleep...
He came upstairs and asked what was the matter, he could sense something was up...
and I just broke down and cried so hard, I physically shook...like for about an hour...
and yes, he held me...he knew it was because of Emily...and when I finished crying, we talked about her.
I never knew he did not get to see her with her eyes open. I did. She was the first one out and I think her Apgar was like 2 or 3...and they had to get her breathing and my pastor baptized her...they where working on getting her sister out and brought her to me bundled up...you ever see a cancer patient in the last stages? How you can see and smell death from them? She had death in her sweet little eyes...I told her I loved her and how beautiful she was and they whisked her way and her sister was being baptized.
She died while they were sewing me up...but she was with my husband in his arms...from her earthly father to her heavenly one she flew...but her eyes where closed although she was still breathing...and I did not know that until last night...when I finally was brought to her I was able to hold her until she grew cold...
I am thankful I was able to look her in her eyes and tell her how beautiful she was and is and that I love her. I am also thankful that she was surrounded by love as she passed and took it with her.
*holds you tight* I am so sorry sweetheart that you had to go through that but I am so very thankful that the two of you had that talk last night. She is a very blessed little angel.
T
thesweetsweetness
Guest
"A woman who loses her husband is called a widow.
A man who loses his wife is called a widower.
A child who loses its parents is called an orphan.
There is no word to describe a parent who loses a child,
for there is no word to describe the pain."
My best friend posted this on facebook today.
She had a miscarriage today.
Seemed sadly relevant to post here.
(((Hugs to any and all who need them.)))
A man who loses his wife is called a widower.
A child who loses its parents is called an orphan.
There is no word to describe a parent who loses a child,
for there is no word to describe the pain."
My best friend posted this on facebook today.
She had a miscarriage today.
Seemed sadly relevant to post here.
(((Hugs to any and all who need them.)))
H
HesterPrynne
Guest
Last night/morning, I could not keep it inside anymore
so I went downstairs to where my husband was at the computer...(he just came back from two weeks in Tenn...he is now in FL)
to be fair it was a work project not Command and Conquer for once...
anyways, I came back upstairs and got back in bed and just played my Ipod trying to go to sleep...
He came upstairs and asked what was the matter, he could sense something was up...
and I just broke down and cried so hard, I physically shook...like for about an hour...
and yes, he held me...he knew it was because of Emily...and when I finished crying, we talked about her.
I never knew he did not get to see her with her eyes open. I did. She was the first one out and I think her Apgar was like 2 or 3...and they had to get her breathing and my pastor baptized her...they where working on getting her sister out and brought her to me bundled up...you ever see a cancer patient in the last stages? How you can see and smell death from them? She had death in her sweet little eyes...I told her I loved her and how beautiful she was and they whisked her way and her sister was being baptized.
She died while they were sewing me up...but she was with my husband in his arms...from her earthly father to her heavenly one she flew...but her eyes where closed although she was still breathing...and I did not know that until last night...when I finally was brought to her I was able to hold her until she grew cold...
I am thankful I was able to look her in her eyes and tell her how beautiful she was and is and that I love her. I am also thankful that she was surrounded by love as she passed and took it with her.
My heart goes out to you Serene ..... Think of her happy and laughing and playing today as she smiles down on you.
JennyNo1
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- May 1, 2010
- Posts
- 23,459
*hugs to sereneone* Those of us who write are not used to those times when words fail expression. This is one of those times. I hope that you feel the love and support of those around you, those of us here, and from your little angel who watches over you now, smiling and loving you, always the same.
H
HesterPrynne
Guest
*grabs blanket and curls up in big chair*
Wolfking05
Lurking in the woods
- Joined
- Aug 11, 2006
- Posts
- 15,547
*BIG HUGS* to those that need them
((((((SERENE)))))) Glad you two finally talked a lil about it.........I hope that it helped you both in some small way
((((((SERENE)))))) Glad you two finally talked a lil about it.........I hope that it helped you both in some small way
H
HesterPrynne
Guest
*BIG HUGS* to those that need them
((((((SERENE)))))) Glad you two finally talked a lil about it.........I hope that it helped you both in some small way
Wolfie!! Cuddle?
Wolfking05
Lurking in the woods
- Joined
- Aug 11, 2006
- Posts
- 15,547
H
HesterPrynne
Guest
You bet Hester*Cuddles*
Mmmm ... *scratches ears and tummy rubs*.
Hugs .... You are so sweet Wolfie.
Thank you.
Wolfking05
Lurking in the woods
- Joined
- Aug 11, 2006
- Posts
- 15,547
Mmmm ... *scratches ears and tummy rubs*.
Hugs .... You are so sweet Wolfie.
Anytime
Spicy Southern Belle
A Touch of Spice
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2004
- Posts
- 12,222
"A woman who loses her husband is called a widow.
A man who loses his wife is called a widower.
A child who loses its parents is called an orphan.
There is no word to describe a parent who loses a child,
for there is no word to describe the pain."
My best friend posted this on facebook today.
She had a miscarriage today.
Seemed sadly relevant to post here.
(((Hugs to any and all who need them.)))
*HUGS* I am so sorry for your friend. They are extremely relevant words. No matter how much you try, this is one of those things people just never seem to have the words for. Even those who have walked this path.
Thank you for sharing.
*hugs*
Spicy Southern Belle
A Touch of Spice
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2004
- Posts
- 12,222
In 1988, President Ronald Regan declared October to be Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. October 15th is officially known as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.
You can find out more information about the movement behind this day becoming official or just on how to help people you know suffering or just to understand at http://www.october15th.com/ or on http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pregnancy_and_Infant_Loss_Remembrance_Day
I thought sharing this would be appropriate considering what Serene had shared with us today. I suffered a loss of my own and, while not as traumatic and heart-wrenching as Serene's, it is still something that is a very big part of my life. Having the support of others makes it so much easier. Remembering makes it feel like I am doing what I can to honor my son. If sharing this site helps just one person then I am happy.
You can find out more information about the movement behind this day becoming official or just on how to help people you know suffering or just to understand at http://www.october15th.com/ or on http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pregnancy_and_Infant_Loss_Remembrance_Day
I thought sharing this would be appropriate considering what Serene had shared with us today. I suffered a loss of my own and, while not as traumatic and heart-wrenching as Serene's, it is still something that is a very big part of my life. Having the support of others makes it so much easier. Remembering makes it feel like I am doing what I can to honor my son. If sharing this site helps just one person then I am happy.
SweetieBee
Cumming in my panties...
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2010
- Posts
- 7,806
Hugs.
Spicy Southern Belle
A Touch of Spice
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2004
- Posts
- 12,222
avrgblkgrl
Simply Delicious
- Joined
- Mar 12, 2010
- Posts
- 8,280
Thank you
This is so true; there are no words to explain it. I am a lover of words and yet the pain involved in trying to transcribe the emotion associated with something so devastating is impossible. So, no one can quite understand unless they have endured it. I do not have to consciously remember the date. It isn't written down anywhere in my home. My body just knows it. It responds as it approaches and it mourns of its own volition. I never ask myself why and don't bother fighting it because it is mine. It is a birthday that actually exists but not by literal definition. I simply know that she was there and is not any more. For her, I remember.
"A woman who loses her husband is called a widow.
A man who loses his wife is called a widower.
A child who loses its parents is called an orphan.
There is no word to describe a parent who loses a child,
for there is no word to describe the pain."
My best friend posted this on facebook today.
She had a miscarriage today.
Seemed sadly relevant to post here.
(((Hugs to any and all who need them.)))
This is so true; there are no words to explain it. I am a lover of words and yet the pain involved in trying to transcribe the emotion associated with something so devastating is impossible. So, no one can quite understand unless they have endured it. I do not have to consciously remember the date. It isn't written down anywhere in my home. My body just knows it. It responds as it approaches and it mourns of its own volition. I never ask myself why and don't bother fighting it because it is mine. It is a birthday that actually exists but not by literal definition. I simply know that she was there and is not any more. For her, I remember.
Spicy Southern Belle
A Touch of Spice
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2004
- Posts
- 12,222
Thank you for sharing that sweetheart. *HUGS*
N
NorthRockJohnson
Guest
Big hugs to ((((SERENE)))) and everyone else that needs one. You're all good people and I've got nothing but love for you. ((((HUGS))))
SweetieBee
Cumming in my panties...
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2010
- Posts
- 7,806
