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The Isolated Blurt Thread IV: A New Hope

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Remember the old days when we would scramble to be the last poster? Ahh, the folly of youth.
 
In other news...make up your fucking mind woman. You claim I am controlling yet you drove the bus for the last 6 months and are now fucking with my head. You didn't even have the fucking balls to say it yesterday, you made me say it.

I am so fucking pissed right now.
 
I've never had great success with Modcloth. I love the concept it just... never pans out.
 
Years ago Ole Johnny was a member of Gold's Gym. When the time came to quit the gym,he filled out the papers, certified and notarized, and mailed them to some far off corporate office.

Nearly a year went by with the $39.99 charge hitting his Amex. Calls and letters, threats and promises.

Johnny said to Johnny, "Never, ever again, will you give someone your card number and allow them to charge it for eternity." Words he lived by for years. No automatic charges.

Fast forward to March 5, 2014... Gold's Gym now has a no-contract, pay-for-the-year-in-advance.

So Ole Johnny trods down to the gym with cash in hand. "Oh, we need your credit card info on file in case there are any additional charges."

Lunk-heads would fall for this, but Ole Johnny won't! Johnny will remain human veal.
 
Government surveyors came to Ole's farm in the fall and asked if they could
do some surveying.
Ole agreed, and Lena even served them a nice meal at noon time.
The next spring, the two surveyors stopped by and told Ole,
"Because you were so kind to us, we wanted to give you this bad news in
person instead of by letter."
Ole replied, "What's the bad news?"
The surveyors stated, "Well, after our work here, we discovered your farm is
not in Minnesota but is actually in Wisconsin!"
Ole looked at Lena and said,
"That's the best news I have heard in a long time. I just told Lena this
morning that
I don't think I can take another winter in Minnesota."
 
phantom4533 said:
Government surveyors came to Ole's farm in the fall and asked if they could
do some surveying.
Ole agreed, and Lena even served them a nice meal at noon time.
The next spring, the two surveyors stopped by and told Ole,
"Because you were so kind to us, we wanted to give you this bad news in
person instead of by letter."
Ole replied, "What's the bad news?"
The surveyors stated, "Well, after our work here, we discovered your farm is
not in Minnesota but is actually in Wisconsin!"
Ole looked at Lena and said,
"That's the best news I have heard in a long time. I just told Lena this
morning that
I don't think I can take another winter in Minnesota."
Click to expand...

"Ole and Lena got married. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena's knee. Giggling, Lena said, "Ole, you can go a little farther now if ya vant to"... so Ole drove to Duluth. "
 
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