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The "Fuck you cancer!" thread

My mum has just been diagnosed with a blood cancer. I think we are still all in shock and denial - wonder how long I can stay there??

FYC.
 
I've finally gotten health insurance. It's taken me a while to start using it because my hours had been cut at work. Will finally be getting blood work and endoscopy after 5-year gap. (I was diagnosed with an indolent form of Non-Hodgkins back in 2007. Had radiation in 2008.) Don't really expect the tests to show anything, but if it does, c'est la vie.

Wishing everyone a great weekend!
 
LadyVer said:
I've finally gotten health insurance. It's taken me a while to start using it because my hours had been cut at work. Will finally be getting blood work and endoscopy after 5-year gap. (I was diagnosed with an indolent form of Non-Hodgkins back in 2007. Had radiation in 2008.) Don't really expect the tests to show anything, but if it does, c'est la vie.

Wishing everyone a great weekend!
Click to expand...

Glad to hear that your coverage is now effective. Good luck with the tests.
 
Hello All,
I'm looking for a better understanding of something and I'm hoping one of you will be able to assist me. It may require some sharing of information, feelings, emotions, etc. My question is: What makes someone (a person being treated with oral medications, that are working in his favor) talk about wanting to give up the use of all medications? Also, the side effects of the meds have been minimal thus far. Any help will be most appreciated.

thanks in advance,
Apple :rose:
 
Apple_of_Eden said:
Hello All,
I'm looking for a better understanding of something and I'm hoping one of you will be able to assist me. It may require some sharing of information, feelings, emotions, etc. My question is: What makes someone (a person being treated with oral medications, that are working in his favor) talk about wanting to give up the use of all medications? Also, the side effects of the meds have been minimal thus far. Any help will be most appreciated.

thanks in advance,
Apple :rose:
Click to expand...

This is a tough one. Does it sound to you like "giving up the use of all medications" is a declaration of giving up the fight altogether? Or could it mean something else. I'm not at all clear from your post, so I guess the question is this: are you clear what this person means?
 
midwestyankee said:
This is a tough one. Does it sound to you like "giving up the use of all medications" is a declaration of giving up the fight altogether? Or could it mean something else. I'm not at all clear from your post, so I guess the question is this: are you clear what this person means?
Click to expand...

Hi midwestyankee,

I don't believe he's given up the fight. He seems to be "tired" of everything. Taking pills, being tired, feeling ill, and just "tired" of everything that goes on with dealing with a long term illness that has "robbed" him of his "normal" life. Also, he talks about his body "healing itself."
 
Apple_of_Eden said:
Hi midwestyankee,

I don't believe he's given up the fight. He seems to be "tired" of everything. Taking pills, being tired, feeling ill, and just "tired" of everything that goes on with dealing with a long term illness that has "robbed" him of his "normal" life. Also, he talks about his body "healing itself."
Click to expand...

The body can heal itself, but usually it's just not up to fixing cancer. I can fully understand being tired of everything, even when the side effects from the treatment aren't all that bad. I never had more than a tiny bit of nausea nor did I have many of the other nasty side-effects that others experience, yet by the mid-point in my chemo treatments I was fed up with everything. Maybe he just needs some kind of mental vacation to restore his psychic energy. Perhaps a good massage might be in order, or a day trip to someplace he really enjoys. It sounds like he needs to get his head centered on something other than himself for at least a short while.
 
midwestyankee said:
The body can heal itself, but usually it's just not up to fixing cancer. I can fully understand being tired of everything, even when the side effects from the treatment aren't all that bad. I never had more than a tiny bit of nausea nor did I have many of the other nasty side-effects that others experience, yet by the mid-point in my chemo treatments I was fed up with everything. Maybe he just needs some kind of mental vacation to restore his psychic energy. Perhaps a good massage might be in order, or a day trip to someplace he really enjoys. It sounds like he needs to get his head centered on something other than himself for at least a short while.
Click to expand...

He has been treated for depression during his illness. He seems to flux up and down with it at times. He's stopped most of his meds a few months ago. First his antidepressives, then some of the "non-essential" meds, a few months ago he took himself off most of his pain meds. Now, he talks of stopping his chemo meds. They just started working for him a few weeks ago. He hated what was going on before the meds "kicked in." I don't get it~~!

He is really testing my ability to adapt to his needs, whims, changes, etc. I will try to do some of your suggestions and see it that helps. He really is challenging with his "unusual decision making" lately.
 
Apple_of_Eden said:
He has been treated for depression during his illness. He seems to flux up and down with it at times. He's stopped most of his meds a few months ago. First his antidepressives, then some of the "non-essential" meds, a few months ago he took himself off most of his pain meds. Now, he talks of stopping his chemo meds. They just started working for him a few weeks ago. He hated what was going on before the meds "kicked in." I don't get it~~!

He is really testing my ability to adapt to his needs, whims, changes, etc. I will try to do some of your suggestions and see it that helps. He really is challenging with his "unusual decision making" lately.
Click to expand...



We each walk kind of a different path in this disease, but have tons of shared experiences. I'm not trying to tell you I know how to deal with your path or his path or issue platitudes, so forgive me if this sounds trite. Have you tried any of the support groups like at cancer.org or ComfortKeppers.com, or similar websites? Good luck with this trial!! FYC!!!
 
Apple_of_Eden said:
He has been treated for depression during his illness. He seems to flux up and down with it at times. He's stopped most of his meds a few months ago. First his antidepressives, then some of the "non-essential" meds, a few months ago he took himself off most of his pain meds. Now, he talks of stopping his chemo meds. They just started working for him a few weeks ago. He hated what was going on before the meds "kicked in." I don't get it~~!

He is really testing my ability to adapt to his needs, whims, changes, etc. I will try to do some of your suggestions and see it that helps. He really is challenging with his "unusual decision making" lately.
Click to expand...

For what it's worth, my decision-making was a tad shaky when I was on chemo. I was also more forgetful than usual and often had days when I felt like I was in a mental fog. It was a classic case of chemo brain. When the chemo brain strikes, you need two things: awareness that it's happening and it's not your fault, and someone to help you make good decisions.
 
Apple_of_Eden said:
Hello All,
I'm looking for a better understanding of something and I'm hoping one of you will be able to assist me. It may require some sharing of information, feelings, emotions, etc. My question is: What makes someone (a person being treated with oral medications, that are working in his favor) talk about wanting to give up the use of all medications? Also, the side effects of the meds have been minimal thus far. Any help will be most appreciated.

thanks in advance,
Apple :rose:
Click to expand...

Hi Apple -
I'm sorry to hear about what you are going through. I have seen this behaviour one other time with a friend's grandmother. She was diagnosed with colon cancer, and it was caught early and was easily treatable.
However, her grandmother was deeply religious. She started treatments, and then she let everyone know that she had been praying about it, and God had given her this cancer so she wasn't going to fight it.
You say your friend was treated for depression, is it possible they have some sort of deep seated self worth issues? Anything that would be pushing them towards allowing the disease to take its course?
I hope you can help them get back on track and get past this :rose: :rose:
 
Thanks to everyone for your insight and feedback. I truly appreciate your kind words of support and understanding; along with your ideas of how to deal with my dilemma.

Update: I had a long discussion with my brother. He has agreed it's not in his best interest to stop taking his chemo meds. I asked him why he thought it was and he just repeats his answer to most cancer/illness related questions of late, "I'm just sick of it. I'm tired of being sick and tired of taking pills."

In one way, I understand (as best as an "outsider" can) what he is feeling. But the other option really sucks for him and for everyone who loves him. I reminded him of that and of how many people his decisions truly affect. That may have been selfish on my part, but it seemed to work. He promised not to stop anything without talking to me about it again.

Thank you again.:rose:
FYC! You are really taking a toll~! ...and I hate you for it~!
 
GoAztecs said:
Hopefully only 2 more treatments to go
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SIL has stopped eating because she doesn't enjoy it anymore. Doesn't want to go outside and doesn't want to see people. Dramatic turn in two weeks time. I hate this life stealer! FUCK YOU CANCER!!!!!
 
scotluvsoral said:
SIL has stopped eating because she doesn't enjoy it anymore. Doesn't want to go outside and doesn't want to see people. Dramatic turn in two weeks time. I hate this life stealer! FUCK YOU CANCER!!!!!
Click to expand...

Thoughts are with her
 
A quick update on my son with the cancerous dangly bit. He has now fully recovered from the surgery and it's time to decide about post-op treatment. We have spoken with a radiation oncologist and, today, the same medical oncologist who treated my exit ramp last year. After our consultation, he had the lab do a quick blood draw to see what the current levels are for the key tumor markers, as this information would be a part of determining specific dosages for a chemo treatment.

As some kind of treatment will be necessary due to the size of the tumor (the result of some serious procrastination on his part), it's a choice between going nuclear or getting stabbed and poisoned twice. Radiation this young can mean some nasty long-term consequences that don't seem to be the case with the chemo treatment. Plus, chemo won't leave your scrotum looking like you left it out in the sun on the Fourth of July. Decisions, decisions.

Fortunately, he's in a pretty good frame of mind and is applying his engineering thinking cap to the whole thing. You always want to have things in common with your offspring; this isn't one I would have picked from a list beforehand but we seem to be doing okay with it anyway.
 
midwestyankee said:
A quick update on my son with the cancerous dangly bit. He has now fully recovered from the surgery and it's time to decide about post-op treatment. We have spoken with a radiation oncologist and, today, the same medical oncologist who treated my exit ramp last year. After our consultation, he had the lab do a quick blood draw to see what the current levels are for the key tumor markers, as this information would be a part of determining specific dosages for a chemo treatment.

As some kind of treatment will be necessary due to the size of the tumor (the result of some serious procrastination on his part), it's a choice between going nuclear or getting stabbed and poisoned twice. Radiation this young can mean some nasty long-term consequences that don't seem to be the case with the chemo treatment. Plus, chemo won't leave your scrotum looking like you left it out in the sun on the Fourth of July. Decisions, decisions.

Fortunately, he's in a pretty good frame of mind and is applying his engineering thinking cap to the whole thing. You always want to have things in common with your offspring; this isn't one I would have picked from a list beforehand but we seem to be doing okay with it anyway.
Click to expand...

Tough call. Stabbed and poisoned might be the route
 
midwestyankee said:
A quick update on my son with the cancerous dangly bit. He has now fully recovered from the surgery and it's time to decide about post-op treatment. We have spoken with a radiation oncologist and, today, the same medical oncologist who treated my exit ramp last year. After our consultation, he had the lab do a quick blood draw to see what the current levels are for the key tumor markers, as this information would be a part of determining specific dosages for a chemo treatment.

As some kind of treatment will be necessary due to the size of the tumor (the result of some serious procrastination on his part), it's a choice between going nuclear or getting stabbed and poisoned twice. Radiation this young can mean some nasty long-term consequences that don't seem to be the case with the chemo treatment. Plus, chemo won't leave your scrotum looking like you left it out in the sun on the Fourth of July. Decisions, decisions.

Fortunately, he's in a pretty good frame of mind and is applying his engineering thinking cap to the whole thing. You always want to have things in common with your offspring; this isn't one I would have picked from a list beforehand but we seem to be doing okay with it anyway.
Click to expand...
Im guessing he also has your sense of humor, which can go a long way.
I hope he makes a decision hes happy with in the long run.
Best wishes to him.
 
Niam1985 said:
Im guessing he also has your sense of humor, which can go a long way.
I hope he makes a decision hes happy with in the long run.
Best wishes to him.
Click to expand...

Thanks. It's not necessarily in his best interests to have inherited the snark gene, but in this case it could do him some good.
 
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