The 'ALT' Thread

[IloveClowns]

No please notice that pic as taken prior to me finding the product Nair. It is an amazing product. See how smooth I am now:

http://i55.tinypic.com/28k4uao.jpg

And like I said before. No razor stubble Nair is such a wonderful product

 

[imnauti]

Welcome to the playground IloveClowns. I see that you and IhateClowns have gotten off to quite a good start. I'm surprised the two of you haven't discussed the amazing coincidence that both of you have rather strong feelings towards Clowns. Do you think this might become a problem or is it possible that opposites really do attract?

 

[IhateClowns]

I love our PM chats togther. I agree that there are some people on these boards that are no who they say they are. I am glad I have finally met one that fulfills my needs and desires the way that you do. So you still don't have a cam do you? LOL I am just kidding it doesn't matter. I trust you implicitly.

So I have a few questions. Maybe you can fill me in on. I have a Dear Clowns thread that I help the needy with, but I have a question about women and I would love your take on them if you don't mind. I really would love a woman's perpspective ona few things.

I will start off with the an age old question:

What do you women discuss when you go to the bathroom together? I always have wondered why you go in pairs. Do you need help with the combination to the stalls?

 

[IloveClowns]

Welcome to the playground IloveClowns. I see that you and IhateClowns have gotten off to quite a good start. I'm surprised the two of you haven't discussed the amazing coincidence that both of you have rather strong feelings towards Clowns. Do you think this might become a problem or is it possible that opposites really do attract?

Oh WOW *slaps head* *bites tongue* *starts bleeding* *may need stitches* *but stilll manages a giggle* I never realized that. I knew his name but I didn't realize it was opposite of mine. Silly me *sigh*

I suppose opposites do attract. Ever since he sent me that picture of his bushy taint I have been absolutely smitten. I keep picturing him in a thong making him walk away from me and watch the view. I have it pictured in my head that it would be like a bushy tailed squirrel trying to climb out of his thong. *he he* *snort* *giggle* *roflmao*

 

[Ravi_64]

Typical woman play so hard to get - give me a chance?

 

[Sensualdreamer]

Desperation at it's finest

 

[IloveClowns]

I love our PM chats togther. I agree that there are some people on these boards that are no who they say they are. I am glad I have finally met one that fulfills my needs and desires the way that you do. So you still don't have a cam do you? LOL I am just kidding it doesn't matter. I trust you implicitly.

So I have a few questions. Maybe you can fill me in on. I have a Dear Clowns thread that I help the needy with, but I have a question about women and I would love your take on them if you don't mind. I really would love a woman's perpspective ona few things.

I will start off with the an age old question:

What do you women discuss when you go to the bathroom together? I always have wondered why you go in pairs. Do you need help with the combination to the stalls?

*he he* *giggle* *juicy fart* *lactating nipple* Wouldn't you like to know what we talk about. Well guess what we don't talk at all. We just walk in the door and there is always a full on girl girl orgy in the bathroom. We go in there in pairs so we can eat each other out. It is crazy fun. Why do you think we always come back to the table with a smile

 

[IloveClowns]

Typical woman play so hard to get - give me a chance?

I have heard a lot of creepy things about you about you. Why should I give you a chance? Although i do like creepy

 

[Sensualdreamer]

*he he* *giggle* *juicy fart* *lactating nipple* Wouldn't you like to know what we talk about. Well guess what we don't talk at all. We just walk in the door and there is always a full on girl girl orgy in the bathroom. We go in there in pairs so we can eat each other out. It is crazy fun. Why do you think we always come back to the table with a smile

Hmmm wondering if you weren't one of the former Carolina Panther Cheerleaders that was arrested in Florida for having bathroom sex

 

[IloveClowns]

Desperation at it's finest

I am desperate? That stings SD. I promise to PM you back asap

 

[IloveClowns]

Hmmm wondering if you weren't one of the former Carolina Panther Cheerleaders that was arrested in Florida for having bathroom sex

Nope but she was a sorority sister of mine. She taught us all what public bathrooms are really for

 

[IloveClowns]

Oooops

 

[IhateClowns]

Fuck even I can't keep them straight

I am really upset. I just received a farewell PM from Secretia (IloveClowns). She is hurt by the accusations that she is not a woman. No matter how many pics and how hard she tried to fit in you guys just wouldn't accept her. Then some Ravi guy started harassing her and she said "fuck this shit"

I am really upset. Really sad. First Mildred and now Secretia. Come back my love.

Secretia! Secretia! Secretia!!!

I love you baby. Call me!!!!!!

Thanks everyone for helping her break my heart!!!!

 

[blade_rocknut]

Fuck even I can't keep them straight

I am really upset. I just received a farewell PM from Secretia (IloveClowns). She is hurt by the accusations that she is not a woman. No matter how many pics and how hard she tried to fit in you guys just wouldn't accept her. Then some Ravi guy started harassing her and she said "fuck this shit"

I am really upset. Really sad. First Mildred and now Secretia. Come back my love.

Secretia! Secretia! Secretia!!!

I love you baby. Call me!!!!!!

Thanks everyone for helping her break my heart!!!!

Shoulda jumped in and cornholed her when I had the chance......

 

[Sensualdreamer]

Fuck even I can't keep them straight

I am really upset. I just received a farewell PM from Secretia (IloveClowns). She is hurt by the accusations that she is not a woman. No matter how many pics and how hard she tried to fit in you guys just wouldn't accept her. Then some Ravi guy started harassing her and she said "fuck this shit"

I am really upset. Really sad. First Mildred and now Secretia. Come back my love.

Secretia! Secretia! Secretia!!!

I love you baby. Call me!!!!!!

Thanks everyone for helping her break my heart!!!!

LoL I'll call you but my name's not Secretia

 

[Sensualdreamer]

I am desperate? That stings SD. I promise to PM you back asap

Nahh that was for your admirerer "Ravi"

Nope but she was a sorority sister of mine. She taught us all what public bathrooms are really for

Oh and you're not gonna elaborate huh? I bet you've just disappointed IHC - thought you 2 were soul mates

 

[IloveClowns]

Nahh that was for your admirerer "Ravi"



Oh and you're not gonna elaborate huh? I bet you've just disappointed IHC - thought you 2 were soul mates

I don't like to tie myself down. He is a nice guy and all, but I am here to meet as much young studly men as I possible can. I just took a shower with just a thin white t-shirt on and nothing else. My nipples are so hard for you. No that isn't a third nipple, that is my outtie belly button.

So ladies who are the hot men I should go after in the playground????

 

[IhateClowns]

I don't like to tie myself down. He is a nice guy and all, but I am here to meet as much young studly men as I possible can. I just took a shower with just a thin white t-shirt on and nothing else. My nipples are so hard for you. No that isn't a third nipple, that is my outtie belly button.

So ladies who are the hot men I should go after in the playground????

First off the fact that you called me a nice guy makes me forgive you for the way you left this place without saying goodbye to me. It broke my heart. I was sad for like 3 whole hours. I ate a pint of Hagen-Daz and then went to the mall, broke into the kiosk and ate 2 double doozy cookies. Now my jeans are so tight you can tell what religion I am through them.

I forgive you though. Welcome back.

 

[Morrigu]

I don't like to tie myself down. He is a nice guy and all, but I am here to meet as much young studly men as I possible can. I just took a shower with just a thin white t-shirt on and nothing else. My nipples are so hard for you. No that isn't a third nipple, that is my outtie belly button.

So ladies who are the hot men I should go after in the playground????

It's always better to have someone else tie you down

 

[availableslave2u]

*stands in line to be tied down*

 

[trisquel_astur]

ropes are ready!

 

[IloveClowns]

Hello again. Sorry I haven't been around much. I have spent the last 6 months trying to be good because Anjolina Jolie is my hero so I have been in the Sudan trying to steal a baby away. Unfortunately I got caught. So I spent 6 months in a Sudanese prison waiting for the US Embassy to help me out. Finally after 6 months President Jimmy Carter came to my rescue and got me out of there.

I am so grateful to him. I can tell you that prison life is the worst. It really is hard on you. It changes as person. This is my new pic from my release party:

http://img1.imagehousing.com/72/b4b34632837e9bd2cb4431b63c03d5ce.jpg

I have hired a personal trainer, a nutritionist and the best yoga instructor to get me back to my normal self as soon as possible.

I have heard that the men of lit are not egotistical and love all shapes and sizes of women. I am in dire need of some word lovin.

Care to help me feel like a woman again?

 

[IloveClowns]

I am so glad to be free once again. I am unsure of what i want to do first. I am thinking I want a big sundae from Marble Slab, but I need to work off this prison weight.

I also want to meet a lovely woman. Prison taugt me that I am a lesbian. My cell mate Ming Li would go have me go down on her all the time. At first my tears were muffled by the mound of chewbacca fur that grew from the sides of her prison shorts. Soon after though those tears were because I always had something foreign stuffed in my heiny. When I volunteered to be a "mule" I thought it meant something else. I was just trying to fit in.

So now I need to find a woman who doesn't mind shoving foreign things up my heiny. She has to do it while I am in the fetal position whmpering. Please understand that the whimpering is for me as it brings me back to my first vagina love, Ming Li.

Lemme tell you that woman sure knew how to be tender with me. She always spit on it prior to inserting anything in me. That is love. I will need the same from you. Are you my freedom lover? I sure hope so.

Please realize that there is some residual effects from being in a Sudanese prison for 6 months. I like to sleep on the floor, I pee standig up now, and the screams will die down after 5 minutes. Please be understanding.

I look forward to any PM's from you lovely women. I am apparently a submissive woman. If you wanna dominte me I will feel most at home with you.

 

[IhateClowns]

I think you are full of shit personally. Sudanese prison? Why haven't I seen you on Nancy Grace then? That bitch will cover any story to get her pie hole on the air.

Until I have seen you on Nancy Grace as far as I am concerned you have never been to prison. Because lemme tell you. There is NOTHING more dramatic in this entire world then Nancy Grace while discussing a triple murder plot, somehow bringing her twin babies into the discussion and how she is terrified that her little twins will grow up in a world like it is today.

Honestly there is nothing that brings more tears to my eyes besides Ty Pennington and his bullhorn.

 

[IloveClowns]

I think you are full of shit personally. Sudanese prison? Why haven't I seen you on Nancy Grace then? That bitch will cover any story to get her pie hole on the air.

Until I have seen you on Nancy Grace as far as I am concerned you have never been to prison. Because lemme tell you. There is NOTHING more dramatic in this entire world then Nancy Grace while discussing a triple murder plot, somehow bringing her twin babies into the discussion and how she is terrified that her little twins will grow up in a world like it is today.

Honestly there is nothing that brings more tears to my eyes besides Ty Pennington and his bullhorn.

Oh God not you again! Please leave me alone. What part of cunny licker do you not understand? I don't want you and your tiny penis anymore. I have had so many large foreign objects stuck up my private parts you would have to fuck me sideways for me to feel that tiny little thing. It would look like a bell clapper from the inside.

As for not being on Nancy Grace I declined the in prison interview because I knew I wasn't going to get a word in edge wise. So I did my interview with Geraldo Rivera. I like his mustache, but not enough to switch from pussy. I love pussy.

So please leave me alone. Go bug someone else. This thread is for women only please. If you have a penis you are not allowed on here anymore. Don't make me block you.