Ten things you'll never hear a man/woman say

[Bindii]

I'm bored! (can you tell?)


Ten Things You'll Never Hear A Man Say

10. Here honey, you use the remote.
9. You know, I'd like to see her again, but her breasts are just too big.
8. Ooh, Antonio Banderas AND Brad Pitt? That's one movie I gotta see!
7. While I'm up, can I get you anything?
6. Honey since we don't have anything else planned, will you go to the
wallpaper store with me?
5. Sex isn't that important; sometimes, I just want to be held.
4. Why don't you go to the mall with me and help me pick out a pair of shoes?
3. Aww, forget Monday Night Football, let's watch Melrose Place.
2. Hey let me hold your purse while you try that on.
1. We never talk anymore.

Ten Things You'll Never Hear A Woman Say

10. What do you mean today's our anniversary?
9. Can we not talk to each other tonight? I'd rather just watch TV.
8. Ohh, this diamond ring is way too big!!
7. And for our honeymoon we're going fishing in San Diego!!!!
6. Can our relationship get a little more physical? I'm tired of being "just
friends."
5. Honey, does this outfit make my butt look too small?
4. Aww, don't stop for directions, I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how
to get there.
3. Is that phone for me? Tell 'em I'm not here.
2. I don't care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer
dress.
1. Hey, pull my finger!

 

[Cotedebeaune]

bump

 

[Bindii]

bump

and grind

 

[metal_minx]

3. Is that phone for me? Tell 'em I'm not here.


i've said that plenty of times....damn bill collectors

 

[huskie]

From woman:
"Hey, I'll bet I can drink more beer than you."

From the man:
"Honey, can I go to that scapbook meeting with you?"

 

[Throbbin_Rod]

From a man:

"Honey does my ass look fat in these jeans?"

 

[Bindii]

From a man:

"Honey does my ass look fat in these jeans?"

Yes, but it detracts from your face!

 

[Velius]

3. Aww, forget Monday Night Football, let's watch Melrose Place.

Personally, I don't like football, but I wouldn't watch Melrose Place either. It would be more like, "Ahhhh!! Monday Night Football!! Change it."

 

[Cotedebeaune]

"does this dress make my arse look fat?"
"no. Your arse makes your arse look fat!"

 

[Bindii]

"does this dress make my arse look fat?"
"no. Your arse makes your arse look fat!"

Does your av look fat in this?

 

[naudiz]

Keeping in mind I'm not exactly the most delicate flower of womanhood out there...

10. What do you mean today's our anniversary? -- Shit, I still can't remember when it is.

9. Can we not talk to each other tonight? I'd rather just watch TV. -- Usually it's, "What? I wasn't listening. Someone online said something funny."

8. Ohh, this diamond ring is way too big!! -- Don't care much for diamonds. Now my mood ring? That's cool.

7. And for our honeymoon we're going fishing in San Diego!!!! -- San Diego? The best fishing is in Oregon!

6. Can our relationship get a little more physical? I'm tired of being "just friends." -- Heh heh heh. At that point, I usually don't talk. I pounce.

5. Honey, does this outfit make my butt look too small? -- Okay, I've never said that.

4. Aww, don't stop for directions, I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how to get there. -- I don't need no steenkin' directions. I never get lost! I just like to take the scenic route.

3. Is that phone for me? Tell 'em I'm not here. -- Constantly.

2. I don't care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer dress. -- When would I buy a designer dress?

1. Hey, pull my finger! -- I plead the fifth. Then I drink it.

 

[brokenbrainwave]

From woman:
"Hey, I'll bet I can drink more beer than you."

apparently you've never encountered my wife at a bar. one week to the day after having our first son, she came to the bar I was managing at the time and proceeded to pick up where she left off 9 months earlier...leaving guys in the dust chugging draft beer.

 

[InnocentAngel81]

I'm bored! (can you tell?)




Ten Things You'll Never Hear A Woman Say

3. Is that phone for me? Tell 'em I'm not here.
2. I don't care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer
dress.
1. Hey, pull my finger!

i've said that alot

 

[Sillyman]

I think Melrose place sucks, but I think football sucks too. Couldn't we watch cartoons or better yet just turn the damn thing off and snog?

I hand over the remote all the time. I don't want the damn thing.

I would want help with the shoe shopping too. I get tired of my feet looking ratty all the time.

 

[APhil]

10. Here honey, you use the remote.

I can't find anything good on TV.

9. You know, I'd like to see her again, but her breasts are just too big.

They distract me from reading her lips.

8. Ooh, Antonio Banderas AND Brad Pitt? That's one movie I gotta see!

'Cause they gotta be havin' a hot chick in there somewhere!

7. While I'm up, can I get you anything?

So I don't have to get up for you to get it later?

6. Honey since we don't have anything else planned, will you go to the wallpaper store with me?

So YOU can determine what the kitchen is gonna wind up lookin' like?

5. Sex isn't that important; sometimes, I just want to be held.

Yeah, like after sex, when I'm almost asleep.

4. Why don't you go to the mall with me and help me pick out a pair of shoes?

'Cause apparently the people at the shoe store have no idea what the words "work boot" mean.

3. Aww, forget Monday Night Football, let's watch Melrose Place.

... (The show sucked since Heather Locklear and Hunter Tylo left.)

2. Hey let me hold your purse while you try that on.

'Cause you're gonna ask me to anyway.

1. We never talk anymore.

Rather, I never talk to you anymore. You seem to know everything that's wrong with me and how to fix it. First step: removing my nuts.

 

[YourSweetOne]

Actually my brother asked me to go to the mall with him today to buy sandles lmao....he knows he cant pick them out himself! and he needed me to drive his sorry ass around lol.

And oh no us girls do say "this diamond ring is way to big!" the problem issssssssss.......we dont mean it! lmao....we say it cause we are supposed to be modest and all cutsie saying no no dear a small one is good enough for me i know you know me....but thats crap! we want and love big old diamonds! lol

ok sorry had to say it lol

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

lol Waaaaa what? it makes sense to me.....but as is pointed out to me so often....my logic is totally screwed up!!!!!! lmao...dont ask me.

 

[freakygirl]

Whaaaa??

Emerald eyed, When you figure it out could you PM me please?

thanks