Suicidal thoughts = Suicidal?

[Quoll]

If you have suicidal thoughts does that mean you are suicidal or is it simply a coping mechanism that your mind creates when you feel you are in a situation with no apparent way out?
Are suicidal thoughts merely a safety valve or are they the precursor to something more final?
Does everyone have them at some stage in their life?
Any other thoughts or ideas are welcome.
Discussion topic, not cry for help.

 

[cinnamonstick]

Sometimes they are just thoughts. Time to worry is when you have a workable plan to kill yourself.

 

[EJFan]

i don't think that thoughts equal inclination in any situation. with something as serious as suicide or homocide or pedophelia, etc., it certainly is significant and should be addressed.

 

[silverwhisper]

i cannot add to EJ's wisdom.

ed

 

[bisexplicit]

They most certainly don't mean that you /are/ suicidal.

I cannot get upset without considering/pondering suicide. However, it's not a suicidal episode where I will attempt to overdose, or dwell on it. It's frustrating, however, when people don't see the difference - especially therapists.

 

[bandelero]

I would think that everyone who has ever felt hurt/rejected/overwhelmed by life has given at least a fleeting thought to suicide.
Unless it becomes a consistent train of thought I would imagine most people would get past the black moment and find many more reasons to live than not.
To anyone contemplating it I would recommend they set a review date 1 month from the time they first think of suicide. From personal experience I can categorically state that the way you feel even 1 day after first thinking "I can't face it anymore!" is a often whole lot different.

As an answer to the original question then I would say that suicidal thoughts do not definitely equal a suicidal person, but any that occur more than once or twice ought to be discussed with someone.
hope that doesn't sound too pompous

 

[bobsgirl]

If you have suicidal thoughts does that mean you are suicidal or is it simply a coping mechanism that your mind creates when you feel you are in a situation with no apparent way out?
Are suicidal thoughts merely a safety valve or are they the precursor to something more final?
Does everyone have them at some stage in their life?
Any other thoughts or ideas are welcome.
Discussion topic, not cry for help.

I've had them before, more than a few times. It's not so much about dying as it is about getting relief from the unrelenting pain of depression. I can remember driving along some road, and wondering what it would feel like to just drive the car into the nearest tree. I have hurt enough both physically and mentally, at times, that suicide seems to be the only way to stop hurting.

The thing to remember though, is that no matter how bad things are, and they can be pretty shitty, they will always get better. I've come through to the other side when I really thought I couldn't hold on for another minute.

 

[pleasteasme]

I've had them before, more than a few times. It's not so much about dying as it is about getting relief from the unrelenting pain of depression. I can remember driving along some road, and wondering what it would feel like to just drive the car into the nearest tree. I have hurt enough both physically and mentally, at times, that suicide seems to be the only way to stop hurting.

The thing to remember though, is that no matter how bad things are, and they can be pretty shitty, they will always get better. I've come through to the other side when I really thought I couldn't hold on for another minute.

bg

I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one that has had those types of thoughts every now and again.

 

[Recidiva]

The technical terms are "ideations" and then there are "plans"

If you're just thinking about it, it's a fantasy. If you're seriously making real-life plans as in "I have to buy some extra pills this weekend" that's different clinically. Yeah, first leads to second, but fantasizing about dying or murdering...very often is nto something people invest that much real energy in past "I wish I could die" and "I wish that person would drop dead" in various detached "watching a movie" ways.

I'd worry if you can't think about anything else or if you've progressed to plans.

 

[bobsgirl]

bg

I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one that has had those types of thoughts every now and again.

You most assuredly are not the only one.

If you're just thinking about it, it's a fantasy. If you're seriously making real-life plans as in "I have to buy some extra pills this weekend" that's different clinically. Yeah, first leads to second, but fantasizing about dying or murdering...very often is nto something people invest that much real energy in past "I wish I could die" and "I wish that person would drop dead" in various detached "watching a movie" ways.

I like the way you put this. I've not ever put any real energy into making actual plans. That's why the "running into a tree" thought scared me. I knew then it was time to ask for help.

 

[lovingdreamer]

Suicide comes close to my heart. I had a sister take her life 14 or 15 years ago. She was depressed for a long time, had lots of problmes with asthma and allergies on top of the depression. She had tried to kill herself several times. Always telling one day she would get it right. And one day she did handgun to the head. It was very very hard on my family. She was done suffering, but my family just started. It is still very hard on my mom to this day.
If you are thinking about suicide remember that it is a total end and you can not take it back. You leave those who love you to cry and be scared and ask questions that you will not be able to answer. if you really wonder about suicide and play around with the idea, please also think about those who you will leave behind.

 

[bobsgirl]

Suicide comes close to my heart. I had a sister take her life 14 or 15 years ago. She was depressed for a long time, had lots of problmes with asthma and allergies on top of the depression. She had tried to kill herself several times. Always telling one day she would get it right. And one day she did handgun to the head. It was very very hard on my family. She was done suffering, but my family just started. It is still very hard on my mom to this day.
If you are thinking about suicide remember that it is a total end and you can not take it back. You leave those who love you to cry and be scared and ask questions that you will not be able to answer. if you really wonder about suicide and play around with the idea, please also think about those who you will leave behind.

I'm very sorry for your family's loss.


Edited to add: Welcome to Lit, BTW.

 

[Straight-8]

Suicidal 'thoughts' are natural; but it always a question of degree. Everybody feels sorry for themselves and/or wants to 'show' somebody how sorry they'll feel when they are gone. It is the ultimate selfish act and people are inately selfish.

But if the suicidal thoughts are persistent or involve planning of any type, get help.

I always thought (idly) that if I had a terminal disease I would try and find the right time to take the quick way out...until one of my friend's parents did just that. He was a rancher and did the old west thing of giving his saddle away and then shot himself. I can understand his state of mind but when I see what it did to his daughter I can't forgive him. He should have had the courage to tough it out for her. But maybe his problem was just that we don't live in a civilized enough society to allow us to discuss these kind of choices in the end game.

 

[Quoll]

Thanks everyone for your responses so far, I started this thread because it was something that I kept seeing or hearing about in the last few weeks and it seemed to need discussing.
I will post my thoughts later when I am in a more cognisant frame of mind ie:awake.

 

[human_male]

I had them for most of the years between eighteen and twenty-fiveish. I tried twice. Once seriously, once half-assed. I think someone might have suicidal fantasies and not actually be suicidal. And I certainly regarded it as a kind of safety net. I'd tell myself if things get too bad I can always pop myself. Now I'm older it no longer seems like a viable decision and it's actually kinda scary.

I think everyone probably has those kinds of thoughts now and again. I agree with the comment that if you actually have a plan, or consider it a viable remedy to a situation, like "ok, if things get any worse, then I'm just gonna do it." then you should probably think about talking to someone. That doesn't always help but it's a step in the right direction.

 

[bobsgirl]

I had them for most of the years between eighteen and twenty-fiveish. I tried twice. Once seriously, once half-assed. I think someone might have suicidal fantasies and not actually be suicidal. And I certainly regarded it as a kind of safety net. I'd tell myself if things get too bad I can always pop myself. Now I'm older it no longer seems like a viable decision and it's actually kinda scary.

I think everyone probably has those kinds of thoughts now and again. I agree with the comment that if you actually have a plan, or consider it a viable remedy to a situation, like "ok, if things get any worse, then I'm just gonna do it." then you should probably think about talking to someone. That doesn't always help but it's a step in the right direction.

May I just say that it's a very good thing that both attempts were unsuccessful. I tried it once (I admit not a very serious attempt) when I was in my late teens. Like you, the idea of it now is vaguely frightening to me. A very permanent fix for temporary problems in most cases, and if it's successful, you can't ask for a do-over.