Strong opinions about nothing important

[slvjenn]

OK, I'm REALLY tired...I got like 4 hours sleep last night and for some reason I feel like ranting.

I can't put a finger on why this bothers me, but it does.

I often see submissives referring to themselves as "subs" and sometimes even "subbies" and I can't stand it. I don't know why but it's kind of like someone running his or her fingernails down a chalkboard.

Think about it. You are submissive, not a sub. A sub is a device for underwater travel.

For some reason I have no such button for Dominants who refer to themselves as Doms. I can't say why.

Another thing that seems to get on my nerves are submissives who talk in third person. I think this has to do with some book or something, but it really doesn't matter. To me, it just makes you sound like you are mentally deficient. <if you don't mind my ignoring Politically Correct terms, you sound like a moron.> IMO

Another thing I see once in a while is people either complaining about others NOT capitalizing *i* or capitalizing it when they feel it shouldn't be. Sometimes I do, and sometimes i don't. Deal.

Then there is the D/s and His and Him and He capitals. I don't quite get all this. I know what it all stands for and why it's done, but really, I feel it isn't needed since most everyone here is supposed to be "in the know" at least to some degree.

No one here should feel this is directed at them specifically as it actually mostly stems from other places.

I guess I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning, or maybe I am just in an overly rebellious mood. Just ignore me and it’ll all go away by my second cup of coffee.

 

[serijules]

The "online" language of D/s drives me mad too, and it's not something I follow, but I respect that others have a need for that kind of structure. However, I usually find myself avoiding conversing with those that over-use the lingo as I usually can't get past the annoyance of it.

I call myself a sub...usually only in typing though. I admit it, I'm lazy, I don't want to type out "submissive" every time I am referring to one, it sounds so stiff and formal. I have a much more casual style of typing than I do speaking...when speaking, I don't use "Dom" (it sounds like im saying dumb with my accent) I don't use "sub" (it sounds sounds so blunt when spoken). I don't say "I dunno" or "wanna", but I often type them. Just suits my casual mood and style.

Just my thoughts on the subject

 

[T.J. Jackson]

The "online" language of D/s drives me mad too, and it's not something I follow, but I respect that others have a need for that kind of structure. However, I usually find myself avoiding conversing with those that over-use the lingo as I usually can't get past the annoyance of it.

I call myself a sub...usually only in typing though. I admit it, I'm lazy, I don't want to type out "submissive" every time I am referring to one, it sounds so stiff and formal. I have a much more casual style of typing than I do speaking...when speaking, I don't use "Dom" (it sounds like im saying dumb with my accent) I don't use "sub" (it sounds sounds so blunt when spoken). I don't say "I dunno" or "wanna", but I often type them. Just suits my casual mood and style.

Just my thoughts on the subject

I think this post hits the nail on the head. Sometimes people are just lazy...sometimes they are just being casual with how they type. I'm just learning the "lingo" so I might use it too much or not in the "correct" way. It's interesting to see who uses what....and the context they use it in. You can learn so much from how people are online by looking at their words, but it doesn't always translate into how they are offline.

 

[Richard49]

A sub is something

I eat

 

[T.J. Jackson]

Re: A sub is something

I eat

LOL

 

[bunny bondage]

ok, here's my humble explinations:

1. i use the term "sub" because i'm just too damn lazy to type out "submissive" every time.

2. i capitalize "He" so everyone will know what kind of person i'm talking about, how they relate to me, and how they're involved in my life. it saves the trouble of typing out "the dom i'm currently seeing" every time. it's just easier.

3. as for refering to yourself in the third person....ok, i have no idea why people do that. it does make them sound as though they are refering to their alter-ego or something.

 

[Richard49]

3. as for refering to yourself in the third person....ok, i have no idea why people do that. it does make them sound as though they are refering to their alter-ego or something.

It is the protical of one of the many schools of BDSM

At one point the only school I knew of was the "old guard"
Now there are several and ther is room for all

Personally .... I no longer subscribe ot any of the schools
Maybe that is why I feel isolated so often

 

[M_Z]

slvjenn, I know how you feel. I had some experiences online that left me baffled. I think the "Gorean" school has had a lot of influence on the way people conduct themselves in BDSM situations online, or rather how they think they should conduct themselves.

I have a theory, or Not So Humble Opinion, that most of what has irritated you originates mostly from people that only engage in "online BDSM" - whatever that is.

Just do your thing, unless He says otherwise.

 

[Ebonyfire]

I personally do not see what the big deal is.

To each his or her own.

My subs do not care what I call them as long as I call them.

 

[Lancecastor]

I personally do not see what the big deal is.

To each his or her own.

My subs do not care what I call them as long as I call them.

Exactly.

It doesn't matter what I call her, as long as she cums on command.

 

[Ebonyfire]

I have a theory, or Not So Humble Opinion, that most of what has irritated you originates mostly from people that only engage in "online BDSM" - whatever that is.

Well you have got a very good point there.

 

[zipman]

I personally do not see what the big deal is.

To each his or her own.

My subs do not care what I call them as long as I call them.

LOL

You have such a great ability to see what's truly important!

 

[Ebonyfire]

LOL

You have such a great ability to see what's truly important!

I realized that slvjenn is frustrated, I can certainly identify with her in that respect. We just seem to get caught up with labelling, when we just need to just get on with it, labels be damned!

 

[bunny bondage]

I have a theory, or Not So Humble Opinion, that most of what has irritated you originates mostly from people that only engage in "online BDSM" - whatever that is.

Just do your thing, unless He says otherwise.

actually, this board is the extent of my "online bdsm" experience, and i figured using "He" would help the lot of you understand who i was talking about!

 

[slvjenn]

My subs do not care what I call them as long as I call them.

That's actually understood, but i'm sure most submissives here have been called worse in various situations. At the same time it is different than refering to yourself in those terms while engaged in general writing and/or conversation.

Anyway, it was only a rant

 

[Richard49]

I realized that slvjenn is frustrated, I can certainly identify with her in that respect. We just seem to get caught up with labelling, when we just need to just get on with it, labels be damned!

I need someone to get it on with <pout>

 

[lark sparrow]

I prefer submissive but also use sub as shorthand sometimes. I don't like "subbie" either - it's too cutsie for me personally - I never use it and I don't respond to it. I have another one too, honestly - people who who use the term slave lightly.

I agree that third person speech does make one sound a bit mentally off - that's how I received my orders to start speaking in it from Mistress, poking fun at those who do - most can only maintain it a few lines and then break into regular speech anyhow. It really does take a bit of discipline to consistently use it - and reinforces (if someone has told you, you must speak that way) their control over your very words and expression of yourself. At first I found it very embarrassing to talk like a "moron", which was part of the lesson. Another part being that to some it indicts that a submissive (or slave) is a Dominant's possession, no longer able to possess anything themselves.

Whether you like it or hate it (I was in the former category previously) if a submissive or slave is doing it expressly for their Dominant under orders and it is an online (read written) expression of D/s, as well as an extra effort that the submissive must put into fulfilling their role, then no one else's opinion matters. I rallied against it for quite some time in asking Mistress if I could stop doing it any place nicely every so often, but came to understand that She simply enjoys it - and that's what matters. I don't ask anymore, I just do it, and happily as it pleases Her. I agree that there isn't much place for for third person speech here on this discussion board as it is confusing to those reading. Obviously I gained permission not to do it here, and She agreed.

I use "Her" to easily indicate Her role in our D/s relationship when writing, helps as we are both female too, as well as to "honor" Her personally as my Dominant. Mistress is worth all the extra keystrokes She wants! I will also cap any Dominant who caps themselves out of respect for their preference. I can deal either way. Captializations aren't used (or perhaps "shouldn't" be used) to impress others or specifically to clue in the clueless. I use them because it is my Mistress' preference in my writing - it's that simple.

I also find it somewhat irritating and/or confusing when people consistently can't spell correctly, use written words incorrectly (their/there), or chose not to (grinz, etc.) but I deal by accepting their expression as is, quietly, usually.

 

[rosco rathbone]

Right there with you on the "nails on the chalikboard" quality of term "sub" and all other terms.

 

[fallon2]

opinion

Everybody is different, Those who want to capitalize I do so and those who don't simply use i for their own purposes and reasons. Subs Do get tired of saying the word submissive repeatedly. Oh, take two aspirin and e mail me in the morning!

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: opinion

Oh, take two aspirin and e mail me in the morning!

LOL

 

[s'lara]

Interesting

As i am still green to the board, i'll just say the following:

The amount of derisive commentary is surprising. But that aside, there are options for dealing with how a "sub" writes in this forum.

Option one - Read it and mentally glaze over the irritants to get to the point being made and not how it is delivered.

Option two - At the first sighting of a "He", "She" or "sub/subbie" in a post, close it and move on.

 

[Impish]

Re: A sub is something

I eat

You just made my night Richard. Thank you.

 

[Richard49]

Re: Re: A sub is something

You just made my night Richard. Thank you.

you are welcome

 

[James G 5]

Re: Interesting

As i am still green to the board, i'll just say the following:

The amount of derisive commentary is surprising. But that aside, there are options for dealing with how a "sub" writes in this forum.

Option one - Read it and mentally glaze over the irritants to get to the point being made and not how it is delivered.

Option two - At the first sighting of a "He", "She" or "sub/subbie" in a post, close it and move on.

Amen!

 

[WynEternal]

1) I wish I had Eb's way with words.

2) Depending on what mood I'm in I will use each of the three words. When I'm speaking formal, it's usually submissive or slave. When I'm in a hurry, I'll shorten it. And when I'm being a brat (gasp!) I'll refer to myself as a subbie.