Story within a story

[AnnieMiller]

Hi Folks

What is the correct way grammar wise to write a character in a story telling a story, does everything the character say need to be in puntuation marks or in italix or do I just put a new title underlined and write as normal from there, its quite a long story and is the basis for the chapter. Any help appreciated !

 

[PennLady]

There is no one correct way to do this and it depends a lot on how your story is put together, what POV you're using (first or third), and things like that. I would also caution about putting a long story within a story -- that can make readers impatient to get back to the original story and if you take too long, they may click off.

So, that said, here are some suggestions.

If the story within a story (SWAS) is short, you could simply have the character relate it, simply, and perhaps without dialogue.

If the SWAS has some length, and I imagine this does since you said it's the basis for a chapter, then you might want to break off into a flashback, or at least a separate section. If it's first-person, for example, you could go for a flashback and just set it off with a line break or whatever your scene break is, like this:

I motioned John to sit down. I had to tell him everything, and now was the time.

* * * * [scene break]
{flashback}
When I was younger... (tell story)

* * * * [scene break]
{back to story}
John didn't react right away, and I held my breath, wondering what he would say.

You could also do this with a third-person story. Either way, you'd punctuate, etc., as usual.

I think the important thing is that you come up with something that doesn't interrupt the flow too much, and doesn't take too long to get back to the original story.

 

[sr71plt]

I hit that dilemma just the other day in reviewing a story for inclusion in an anthology. I had put the interior story in quotes (open quote in all paragraphs and end quote only at the end of the last one) because a character was speaking it. I wasn't sure that was the best way. I looked at it as a separate section (without the quotes), but since I had gone straight into the story as dialogue without any sort of transitional slug to a separate and didn't really want to change it, I kept the quoted spoken monologue treatment.

(Try to resist putting anything of multiple paragraphs in italics, which might be your urge here. That's losing ground as being acceptable.)

 

[oggbashan]

This is how NOT to do it: http://www.literotica.com/s/the-worst-chain-story-ever-ch-01

 

[Weird Harold]

I used a "bar tale" framing story thusly:

From How I Met My Wife:

...

Butch turned his attention back to Byron's problem and put his interest in the woman out of his mind. Butch noted the strange look Kaitlin gave Byron when she delivered the coffee, but soon forgot about it when Byron began his story.

"I guess it's just as much fate that you're making me tell this story today, because it is a story about Kismet. That's the only thing even close to logical I can think of to explain how this whole thing is possible. Not that there's anything logical or rational about believing in predestination or fate. Anyway, it was one year ago today...

***

It had been a beautiful day, and a fine evening. I had spent all afternoon, and most of the evening, girl-watching in the amusement park and along the pier. Now, it looked like the only girl watching I'd be doing for the rest of the night was my collection of adult videos.

...

 

[slyc_willie]

I hit that dilemma just the other day in reviewing a story for inclusion in an anthology. I had put the interior story in quotes (open quote in all paragraphs and end quote only at the end of the last one) because a character was speaking it. I wasn't sure that was the best way. I looked at it as a separate section (without the quotes), but since I had gone straight into the story as dialogue without any sort of transitional slug to a separate and didn't really want to change it, I kept the quoted spoken monologue treatment.

This is how I've usually done it, making it an active conversation in the story. That really works best for short anecdotes, though (in my opinion). A full-fledged story within a story, I think, would need clear demarcation like PL suggested.

 

[PennLady]

This is how I've usually done it, making it an active conversation in the story. That really works best for short anecdotes, though (in my opinion). A full-fledged story within a story, I think, would need clear demarcation like PL suggested.

I do think the length of the story-within-a-story will dictate how it's told to the reader, at least it'll be a big factor.

And I have to say that story-within-a-story is one of the two biggest reasons I stopped reading Anne Rice. If you're story is that long, put it in a separate book. But flashbacks and anecdotes, done right, can do a lot to advance the main story line.

 

[StrangeLife]

In one of my stories I had the guy ending up in a hospital bed pretty early and most of the story about how he got to that point was told in conversations with other characters who visited him. If you like writing dialogue (which I do) it's an good way of doing it.

Otherwise the "scene break" as suggested by PennLady is probably the best way. I've read a few stories using this method and it works fine.

 

[AnnieMiller]

This is great folks. Thanks so much for all your help and I think I know what im doing now. I hope the story within the story works as it is pretty much the only content in the chapter, just a conversation leading to the story then some fired up sex at the end which is the best possible outcome from a good story!

Thanks Again

AM