Stockholm Syndrome

[Natural Born Eros]

I've just been reading for a course I'm studying (comparing Greek and Roman Crime and Law with the modern theories, if you can believe it), and I've been thinking about Stockholm Syndrome. In case you don't know, in 1973, four Swedes were held in a bank vault for six days during a robbery. They became emotionally attached to their captors. The thoery is, and I quote "People who are imtimidated, comtrolled, or made to suffer, begine to love, admite and even sometimes sexually desire their captors."

This has obvious links to sex, and I'm sure links between Stockholm Syndrome and BDSM, etc have already been done to death. My query is whether there is a value in incorporating these ideas into erotic literature. For example, the development of a multi-chapter story from BDSM to romance. Maybe any BDSM story from the subjected perspective should take these theories into account.

I'm no expert on either the Syndrome or BDSM, but I thought that the links were fascinating, and I immediately thought of you guys... I'd love to hear any thoughts you have, directly relevant or not.

Ramble ends.

Eros

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I think it's a sibling to the Florence Nightingale-syndrome, where the nurse fall for the helpless patient. I've also heard of women falling in love with their doctors because of this.

I think it's this thing about being small and helpless while the other one is strong and powerful.

Though I must say that this reminds me more about a parent - child - relationship than a man - woman - relationship.

 

[Weird Harold]

This has obvious links to sex, and I'm sure links between Stockholm Syndrome and BDSM, etc have already been done to death. My query is whether there is a value in incorporating these ideas into erotic literature.

No, the stockholm syndrome does NOT relate well to BDSM -- it's a non-consent sort of connection if anything -- see WhisperSecret's story Hostile Takeover for one example of a story that explores the change from victim to lover.

BDSM is often misunderstood because we 'nilla types can't understand that the subs want the domination/pain before theyenter into the relationship. The Stockholm Syndrome related to how people adapt the a situation they didn't ask for.

Other than WhisperSecret's story, I haven't seen any erotica that accurately explores this kind of situation.

Svenskaflicka said:
I think it's a sibling to the Florence Nightingale-syndrome, where the nurse fall for the helpless patient. I've also heard of women falling in love with their doctors because of this.

I tink there is actually very little the two syndromes have in common. FN synrome taps into the maternal instinct while Stockholm Syndrome taps into deeper and older instincts for preservation -- probably dating back to the days of raiding neighboring tribes for wives.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

I'd be careful of taking too casual a view of Stockholm syndrome. For one thing, a big companent of the victim's identification with the abductors is the fact that the victims see everything from the abductor's point of view and so naturally begin to identify with them. The police or authorities therefore become the enemy and the victims see their self-interest as being tied up with the abductors. It's not entirely an authority thing, otherwise you'd expect all prisoners to fall in love with their jailers, which is hardly the case.

Harold's right about BDSM. It is far more than just ordering someone around or beating them. Unless it's just an S&M relationship, BDSM involves a ritualization of trust and intimacy that actually has little to do with the kind of abuse and terror that abductees are esposed to.


---dr.M.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Re: Re: Stockholm Syndrome

I tink there is actually very little the two syndromes have in common. FN synrome taps into the maternal instinct while Stockholm Syndrome taps into deeper and older instincts for preservation -- probably dating back to the days of raiding neighboring tribes for wives.

But isn't the "preserve me, be gentle with me, don't harm me" - thing the helpless one's way of calling out to a stronger indiovidual to bring out the nurturing (not maternal, I think men also have this side) and protecting instincts in him/her?

 

[Weird Harold]

Re: Re: Re: Stockholm Syndrome

But isn't the "preserve me, be gentle with me, don't harm me" - thing the helpless one's way of calling out to a stronger indiovidual to bring out the nurturing (not maternal, I think men also have this side) and protecting instincts in him/her?

I'm not quite sure what you're asking.

In the Stockholm Syndrome ther are much greater levels of stress of the "Fight or Flight" type that can't be dealt with. I suspect that since Adrenaline is involved in both the "Fight or Flight" reaction and sexual arousal, there is some chemical or hormonal connection that applies there.

The Florence Nightingale syndrome, on the other hand, seldom occurs in the presence of the same kinds of stress. There may be some sort of chemical or hormonal link involved as well, but it's not the adrenaline reactions that Stockholm syndrome would be associated with.

 

[Pure]

A fine contributor, Weird Harold, opined,


No, the stockholm syndrome does NOT relate well to BDSM -- it's a non-consent sort of connection if anything -- see WhisperSecret's story Hostile Takeover for one example of a story that explores the change from victim to lover.

BDSM is often misunderstood because we 'nilla types can't understand that the subs want the domination/pain before theyenter into the relationship. The Stockholm Syndrome related to how people adapt the a situation they didn't ask for.


Natural Born Eros had asked of a connection between bdsm and the SS.

I think there are a number of connections-- with all due respect to WH.

There's a well known mechanism called "identification with the aggresor" and there's identification with the powerful figures in one's life, particularly if one's dependent.

Who fits this? Kids. Look how they may end up, for instance, having the same racial biases. Also abused kids in some cases become abusers, or identify with authority figures (i.e., become blind supporters of authority).

In my opinion, WH is correct, to some extent, about a situation one didn't ask for, i.e., one imposed. Note that that fits childhood, and arguably some of kids' 'love' for parents is of an SS character, esp. in the case of harsh or violent parents. Further, analysts say that even mild parents spur violent fantasies, e.g., of being killed.

So, to complete the argument. Though some folks are legal adults, they long for alliance with a strong figure who'll protect.
That needn't be bdsm, but just old fashioned, old testament, patriarchal marriage. Of course both bdsm scenes and marriages in the West are 'consensual', yet it's pretty clear that childhood scenes and fantasies are involved, i.e., as motivational elements.

As to examples, a careful reading of the Story of O shows many of these elements, partly because the fantasy type of SM shown, has only overrall and periodic consent: she's there voluntarily and returns to the 'chateau'. But in the midst of an SM scene, like a whipping, she's not free to gain immediate release. In short, there's enough helplessness and dependence to trigger some interesting reactions that partake of SS and sadomasochism. This is a gray area 'consensual non-consent' that, it seems, WH did not address.

These are just some thoughts and speculations. Would like to hear comments.

J.

 

[Weird Harold]

A fine contributor, Weird Harold, opined,


BDSM is often misunderstood because we 'nilla types can't understand that the subs want the domination/pain before they enter into the relationship. The Stockholm Syndrome related to how people adapt the a situation they didn't ask for.


I think there are a number of connections-- with all due respect to WH.

There's a well known mechanism called "identification with the aggressor" and there's identification with the powerful figures in one's life, particularly if one's dependent.

...
In short, there's enough helplessness and dependence to trigger some interesting reactions that partake of SS and sadomasochism. This is a gray area 'consensual non-consent' that, it seems, WH did not address.

There are some parallels between BDSM and the Stockholm Syndrome, especially in that gray area of 'consensual non-consent.' There are also similar mechanisms at work in the relationship of abusive parents and children.

However, the Stockholm Syndrome addresses a very limited sub-set of control/domination relationships and, from what I've read, is independent of any prior inclination or experience with dominant relationships.

Patty Hearst is one well known example of the Stockholm Syndrome at work -- there seems to very little of the "submissive" in her relationship with the SLF after her kidnapping and "conversion." She seems to have been a pampered and protected "Princess" before her kidnapping and a dedicated and active revolutionary after.

I think the Romance novel cliche, of abeautiful woman kidnapped by a handsome pirate or outlaw, bears more relationship to the Stockholm Syndrome than BDSM does. There is often no coercion or non-consent involved in those stories. The heroine simply comes to realize that her sympathies lie with the hero who is fighting the gallant fight against oppression and/or injustice. (Of course, the hero's fantastic body and animal magnetism has nothing to dowith her conversion.

 

[TheEarl]

Stockholm Syndrome (as I understand it) is based on the theory that the kidnapper has control over the captive's every action. The captive is provided for by the kidnapper and therefore needs to rely on them for their needs. The captive tries to ingratiate themself with the captor to try and get better treatment and often a bond forms, sometimes to the extent where the kidnapper can refuse to kill his captive because he considers them a friend.

SS wouldn't transfer well to BDSM because (AFAIK) the bond isn't violent, but a misplaced feeling of camaraderie (No, he playsfor Everton - No-one from America will get that, and very few from England) and trust.

Try reading The Danger by Dick Francis: very good (fiction) book about kidnapping and its results on victims.

The Earl

 

[jon.hayworth]

I thought that SS was caused by the fact that during the seige / hostage situation. Both hostage takers and hostages have shared experiences.

The hostages are told that their lives / freedom depends on the authorities acceeding to the hostage takers demands. Therefore the prevarication by the authorities during negotiation is percieved by the hostages as a life threatening action.

The longer the situation continues the closer the hostages and takers aims become - ie both groups want to get out of the situation - alive. The opposition to that are the actions of the authorities.

And as has been said this bares no relationship to the dom / sub relationship that is based upon consent - and what you Vanilla types never realize is that it is the sub who calls the shots. The sub has the safe word. During the pre-sex negotiation the sub prescribes and more importantly proscribes activities. So Top is Bottom and Bottom is Top - it is all a game.

jon

 

[TheEarl]

SS is actually a definite bond. People who have been kidnapped have often voluntarily appeared in their kidnapper's defence at trials, written to them in prison or even assisted the kidnapper to get away from the police.

The Earl

 

[Diane Marie]

Originally posted by Weird Harold
No, the stockholm syndrome does NOT relate well to BDSM -- it's a non-consent sort of connection if anything -- see WhisperSecret's story Hostile Takeover for one example of a story that explores the change from victim to lover.

I really think you’ve got this wrong Weird Harold, Hostile Takeover was not related to the Stockholm Syndrome.

WhisperSecret’s story was more about a change in the abuser then it was about a change in the victim. The victim’s part of the story was more about her self discovery, not her changing. She, of course, did fall in love with her abuser but not the him who first took her virginity that night, he’d grown and changed by the time she felt love for him.

I’m not much for non-consent stories, I guess I would have rather had her make it a little more slippery consent. In a way it was, at the very least WhisperSecret is a good enough writer to have let me interpret it that way. I’m not at all sure that what happened in her story could really ever happen but I loved the way it turned into a love story.

 

[Weird Harold]

I really think you’ve got this wrong Weird Harold, Hostile Takeover was not related to the Stockholm Syndrome.

Possibly not, which is why I said, "a story that explores the change from victim to lover," instead of " story that explores the Stockholm syndrome."

I do know that WhisperSecret was aware of the Stockholm Syndrome when she wrote that story; we discussed it briefly during the editing process.

 

[M.A.Thompson]

I think it's a sibling to the Florence Nightingale-syndrome, where the nurse fall for the helpless patient.

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=65623


Please forgive this self-serving post; it’s just the mood I am in!!!