Should she be allowed to orgasm?

[ToPleaseHim]

When someone posts an intimate message and then invites strangers into their relationship, they should be prepared for the responses to not all be positive affirmations.

Exactly this.

 

[MeekMe]

Like you Nezhul, I chose to be involved. Like you offered things they could do, I too offered a solution. OP asked for input, my input was that if she wants to have orgasms she could dump him and have all the orgasms she wants.

As part of the decision making party, I still stand by my suggestion. Hell, as partial decision maker I say she can have orgasms when, where and how she likes to. Have as many orgasms as you'd like mystery sub.

Good job, call us bitches and say we're mean some more. No one attacked anyone here but you, Nezhul. Being judgemental is frowned upon by you. I see it as something quite necessary and I'll continue to judge and make decisions for myself based on those judgments.

 

[Nezhul]

Like you offered things they could do, I too offered a solution. OP asked for input, my input was that if she wants to have orgasms she could dump him and have all the orgasms she wants.

This "solution" is as valid as saying she should tell him that she's edging but in reality cheat on him with other men.
Or telling him that HE should dump her because she begs too much.

In other words: not valid at all. You can "suggest" hundreds of so-called variants, ranging from simply ridiculous (like yours) to those ending in manslaughter. But the thing is - they are invalid. By definition what you "suggest" is nothing else but aggravated flood meant to hurt somebody. And yeah, I'm kinda aware this phrase there can be used against me, but my own "aggravated flood" is meant to stop people from acting like gods on the forums meant for relaxation and entertainment.

It's the second time in the past 2 weeks that I see someone (women) suggest the destruction of the relationship because she made judgment based on a forum post.
Read: the destruction of human lives and happiness is suggested like this is nothing.

Should I, in the same way, suggest you all make an abortion next time you are pregnant, because you are clearly all lousy mothers? I don't think so. But that's exactly what you are suggesting to others, and exactly that kind of judgment you are making and saying that this is "necessary".

Please think before you touch on serious topics. It's one thing to say the guy he's wrong and that his GF should have a discussion with him. It's another thing to deem people's lives and relationships as if they are toys in your hands, toys you can toss out if you think you see imperfection under a certain light.
Because next time you will suggest someone to break up, the girl will read this, get engaged by your comments and will do something stupid that she may regret.

 

[Nezhul]

Like you offered things they could do, I too offered a solution.

And one more thought.

Do you know a saying that it's better to teach a man how to catch fish than actually give him fish to feed him?

It's true. Fish is a solution to his problem, his hunger.
But fishing is an option he now can take to get a solution for his hunger.

What you suggest the OP (and everyone else reading) is a solution. It's not an option, because it's phrased very definitely.

The thing about solutions is that their wrongness is always in the opposite relation to the amount of information you have. And here - you have none.
The risk that your "solution" is a poison puffer-fish that you are offering is as high as it might get, and you are still offering it.

Instead, I advice you to take to making suggestions, not solutions. Variants, options. If you feel that the girl might be abused by the OP - cover that ground, pointing out openly what is wrong with what he's doing. But keep in mind that you don't know these people, so make an effort to suggest positive things too. Just in case, you know, that the dark picture that you have painted exists only in your head.

 

[aFairy]

Excuse me, ladies, but this is bullshit.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Another vote here for "don't make bystanders part of your sex play without first getting their consent, and being on a BDSM Talk board is not consent".

 

[Farawyn]

Did she cum?

 

[Nezhul]

Another vote here for "don't make bystanders part of your sex play without first getting their consent, and being on a BDSM Talk board is not consent".

But reading such thread does not mean someone involved you. If you dislike the idea - walk away. No consent broken.
Replying - is another thing. But that means you choose to be involved, in other words - give consent.

Otherwise any personal post sharing any personal experience - is in on itself involving everyone who had the misfortune to read it. Which is similar to saying that a man is guilty in murder by the fact of owning a gun.

 

[Titman69x]

Did she cum?

She did.

 

[tairaruth]

I vote she dump you and go have as many orgasms as she'd like.

Where would be the fun in that? ^ ^ lol

 

[tairaruth]

My response has nothing to do with whether she enjoys it or not. I wouldn't give control to someone that felt they needed to poll a group of strangers to make a decision for him.

Perhaps, just perhaps, that's part of their 'thing'. It isn't my business and not mine to judge. To each their own.

 

[tairaruth]

I third this suggestion.

I'm sure this seems like a really fun idea, Hot for the two of you, but many people would not choose to be part of your kink. Getting permission from strangers requires involving strangers in your sex life without their permission.

Surely, we as individual readers have the choice to read or skip if we don't like or approve of something. I mean, sure, we have the choice to comment negatively as well, but .. I don't know .. just seems a bit harsh to me. It isn't as if we aren't 'made privy to all sorts of stories/situations/etc', so why complain about 'this' one?

 

[tairaruth]

Like you Nezhul, I chose to be involved. Like you offered things they could do, I too offered a solution. OP asked for input, my input was that if she wants to have orgasms she could dump him and have all the orgasms she wants.

As part of the decision making party, I still stand by my suggestion. Hell, as partial decision maker I say she can have orgasms when, where and how she likes to. Have as many orgasms as you'd like mystery sub.

Good job, call us bitches and say we're mean some more. No one attacked anyone here but you, Nezhul. Being judgemental is frowned upon by you. I see it as something quite necessary and I'll continue to judge and make decisions for myself based on those judgments.

MeekMe is not so meek LOL . I will nickname the unmeek Meekme!

 

[tryn2Bgood]

I would just like to say that this is my very first day as a member on this site and, from reading some of the comments on this thread, it isn't leaving me with a very good 'first impression'. Note: I am not so vain that I think my opinion is superior to everyone else's, but I don't see any problem at all with the OP. In fact, I kind of liked it. It seems like an innocuous and fun part of their 'play'. I don't think they actually involved anyone in their sex life. (What happens in a forum when someone is actually seeking advise? If you give your advise or suggestions, aren't you involving yourself in their sex life? And if you don't want to get involved, don't give your opinion!) I also don't feel like her privacy was violated by him posting something personal. Does anyone actually know who these people are? No matter . . . It is their business to decide if they wanted to post that. And it's everyone else's decision to help out or ' involve' themselves or not. Aaaaand....now I sound like an asshole for pointing all this out . Maybe this forum stuff isn't really something I should be getting involved in. I just wanted to say to the lovely couple (who, I'm sure, never intended to create such a fuss), "Keep doin' whatcha do and HAVE FUN!" I'd also like to mention that one or two of the commenters actually gave some good advise/sugestions.

 

[SteelieRod]

I would make her wait, then give her a mind blowing orgasm.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[slavemelanie]

The most important underlying fact that people are missing is that she succeeded in the task set before her. The mindset of a sub is that the most important purpose is to please and been seen as pleasing...each action on her part has an equal or greater reaction from her Dominant....she should be proud and excited that she did so. Now the reacting reward should be given to her. Do they both get off sharing this in a public way?...asking a group of people is she should be allowed?....apparently so, and I can associate with that. It's whatever two consenting adults agree to....why is that an issue?

As far as edging, it's absolutely a leaned skill and not as easy as I thought it would be, yes, I've have many failure in attempting this task, did I feel badly. guilt, shame?...yes, absolutely....but that is the point...to learn and experience success and failure and not be afraid to put yourself out there for your Dominant. We submit because we choose to.

just some of ideas that came to mind in reading this subject

enjoy, melanie

 

[slavemelanie]

Oh and btw, she asks out of physical want, but deep inside she wants whatever pleases Him, if the bond is deep.

 

[Primalex]

It seems like an innocuous and fun part of their 'play'.

Yes. And there are places for that.

This is a discussion forum, not a "Look at me, I have a submissive woman! NOW LOOK GODDAMN!" forum.

And all this is written in the fucking sticky topic at the fucking top of the screen:

"We are not a BDSM chat room, nor do we encourage posting 'in role' here. Our aim, as explained above, is to discuss BDSM etc., as an interest or lifestyle, not play it out on the forum. "

What happens in a forum when someone is actually seeking advise?

Then they are right here and get advice.

Disclaimer:
Of course, there are a lot of places to get advice from and this one place is the "free-speech-place", which means people can be nice or mean for whatever or no reason. It is okay to not like this. There are zillions of forums to get advice from which enforce a "be nice" policy, so like in all things, the Internet allows you to choose your preference.

No matter . . . It is their business to decide if they wanted to post that.

Sure. It's just that there are good and bad decisions.

 

[Primalex]

It's the second time in the past 2 weeks that I see someone (women) suggest the destruction of the relationship because she made judgment based on a forum post.

Please think before you touch on serious topics. It's one thing to say the guy he's wrong and that his GF should have a discussion with him. It's another thing to deem people's lives and relationships as if they are toys in your hands, toys you can toss out if you think you see imperfection under a certain light.
Because next time you will suggest someone to break up, the girl will read this, get engaged by your comments and will do something stupid that she may regret.

Please kill yourself.

(Please choose a method that involves as few people as possible.)

 

[Nezhul]

Please kill yourself.

(Please choose a method that involves as few people as possible.)

wow.
just so mature.

simply wow.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Do they both get off sharing this in a public way?...asking a group of people is she should be allowed?....apparently so, and I can associate with that. It's whatever two consenting adults agree to....why is that an issue?

It's an issue because they chose to involve other people who hadn't consented to be part of their exhibitionist games.

 

[Nezhul]

I hadn't consented to read your posts, bramblethorn. Please don't post on any forums anymore, just in case I might see you.

Again, simply reading this thread doesn't get you involved. If people don't want to get involved - don't answer such topics, and you are fine and well.

All the shit started because "an awful inconsiderate dom" posted "a private feeling of an innocent naive sub" without her consent, and thus he's by default so shitty that we should start wishing him for his relationship to be broken.

It's only when it was clarified that the consent was actually there, people realized the stupidity of their initial postings and started shifting the focus to "involving them into sex play", so as to justify their initial toxic behavior.

 

[bdsmluv]

I disagree

I vote she dump you and go have as many orgasms as she'd like.

I think you she is happy with her Dom and I would do the same as her in her position god knows how much it would hurt me being a guy but there's pleasure in pain especially then your following orders from a master or mistress is I am straight

 

[bdsmluv]

Great answer

wow, these responses. Had it ever occurred to you that she may actually love this kind of relationship? This submission?

Yeah, the poor thing indeed. But oh, such a lucky thing too.

What I'd do, I'd make her wait just a bit longer, push her just a bit harder. Then give her a really, really good orgasm experience that would blow her mind away.

Don't push too hard just in case she loses her focus and decides to cheat. A few more hours, or a night - is enough. Let her cum no later than the next morning.

In training your sub, it's important to provide her with a reward for a job well done. Her job is clearly done excellent. Think your reward through.

Also you can entice her with the "chance" to orgasm, even if you've already decided it's a 100% chance. Meet her, or if you are long distance - call her. Make her edge for you, hinting that you probably want to make her wait longer. Then let her orgasm in the end.

It's also worth nothing that this is my take. I don't really enjoy long-term denial, where people go weeks and months without orgasms. And I like watching women cum way too much to do that. A day or two is what I feel to be the limit to being fun.
But at the same time I know that some people enjoy this lifestyle immensely.
Only you can tell what's your situation. If you want to let her cum or let her suffer some more.

p.s. Also as far as denial goes, the good technique is to give her a week or two of orgasms. Lots of them. Make her cum several times a day.
After that, when you put her on denial, it will be twice as frustrating, because her brain got used to getting off regularly and will starve for that pleasure.
Never did it, but I've read people who did describe it.

I really like your answer to this and agree with you completely. this is fun for a day or 2 MAX but its to much and to painful if it lasts any longer