Sexless Marriages

[NickD635]

I've been reading stories here for a long time, but only just joined the site. And found this thread.
All I can say is me too, love my wife, but oh how I miss the sex.
Until now I was beginning to think there was something wrong with me, was I supposed to loose my sex drive as the menopause has robbed it from my wife ?
After reading the posts here, it seems not. My masterbation to the stories here is normal.

And I am not alone.

 

[ChattyMikey]

Because it's for health reasons on her part that we're now sexless, we have reached a friendly understanding and haven't become polarised or fallen out. But I wouldn't pretend that a sexless marriage is fun!

Yes, that's me.

 

[Windman1]

In So cal.

My story seems to be a common one here. Or I think it is. I’m a nice guy who’s wife has lost all interest in physical intimacy. That doesn’t make her a bad person. On the contrary, she is a wonderful person and I don’t want to change our relationship. Our children are grown And we enjoy every other aspect of our relationship.

If you are still with me, what I crave is intimacy. Menopause has taken that away for her. But I still have the desire. I’m not looking to change your relationships either. Maybe there is a woman out there that craves what I do.

 

[ccs29745]

I've been reading stories here for a long time, but only just joined the site. And found this thread.
All I can say is me too, love my wife, but oh how I miss the sex.
Until now I was beginning to think there was something wrong with me, was I supposed to loose my sex drive as the menopause has robbed it from my wife ?
After reading the posts here, it seems not. My masterbation to the stories here is normal.

And I am not alone.

No one ever alone in here. We're all strangers yet friends.

 

[Polranny]

No one ever alone in here. We're all strangers yet friends.

It's important that we hear from the ladies too.
LADIES, help get everything into perspective, its always good to hear from you

 

[IASFPWTF]

i miss the days where it seemed no matter what was going on around us, we just longed for each other.

I keep hoping someday it will come back. But more and more I am not hopeful.

Even if it is just an online romance, I wish I could find someone who longed for me as I them.

I hear you bro

 

[AnnieLit]

It's important that we hear from the ladies too.
LADIES, help get everything into perspective, its always good to hear from you

Ladies on Lit and wives that lost all desire for sex for whatever reason are not exactly the same people, so I am not sure our perspective will help you in any way. Well, besides confirming that women over 40/50/60 that still want sex do exist.

 

[30bandits]

Ladies on Lit and wives that lost all desire for sex for whatever reason are not exactly the same people, so I am not sure our perspective will help you in any way. Well, besides confirming that women over 40/50/60 that still want sex do exist.

send them my way will ya please...

 

[Polranny]

Ladies on Lit and wives that lost all desire for sex for whatever reason are not exactly the same people, so I am not sure our perspective will help you in any way. Well, besides confirming that women over 40/50/60 that still want sex do exist.

This thread is about sexless marriages, there should be no problem . It's just good to get to understand all the how, why and wherefors and solutions ( of which there are many)

 

[AnnieLit]

send them my way will ya please...

Starting a harem, aren't you?

 

[TTawhere]

Ladies on Lit and wives that lost all desire for sex for whatever reason are not exactly the same people, so I am not sure our perspective will help you in any way. Well, besides confirming that women over 40/50/60 that still want sex do exist.

I don't want to speak out of turn, but I think the implication is to hear from ladies on Lit who are experiencing the same issue of being sexless.

 

[TTawhere]

I've been reading stories here for a long time, but only just joined the site. And found this thread.
All I can say is me too, love my wife, but oh how I miss the sex.
Until now I was beginning to think there was something wrong with me, was I supposed to loose my sex drive as the menopause has robbed it from my wife ?
After reading the posts here, it seems not. My masterbation to the stories here is normal.

And I am not alone.

i miss the days where it seemed no matter what was going on around us, we just longed for each other.

I keep hoping someday it will come back. But more and more I am not hopeful.

Even if it is just an online romance, I wish I could find someone who longed for me as I them.

Yes, that's me.

Pretty much all of us.

 

[ccs29745]

Starting a harem, aren't you?

Damn, I go to work and we have harems starting. I miss all the good stuff. Lol

 

[Polranny]

I don't want to speak out of turn, but I think the implication is to hear from ladies on Lit who are experiencing the same issue of being sexless.

Exactly. It takes two to tango. It's good to hear things from the ladies' perspective: we men could learn something

 

[IASFPWTF]

Ladies on Lit and wives that lost all desire for sex for whatever reason are not exactly the same people, so I am not sure our perspective will help you in any way. Well, besides confirming that women over 40/50/60 that still want sex do exist.

Glad to hear that! thank you

 

[ccs29745]

Exactly. It takes two to tango. It's good to hear things from the ladies' perspective: we men could learn something

Always willing to learn. Just don't always remember what I learned.

 

[IASFPWTF]

Always willing to learn. Just don't always remember what I learned.

lol, I know how that is.....

 

[Crownvic]

I've been reading stories here for a long time, but only just joined the site. And found this thread.
All I can say is me too, love my wife, but oh how I miss the sex.
Until now I was beginning to think there was something wrong with me, was I supposed to loose my sex drive as the menopause has robbed it from my wife ?
After reading the posts here, it seems not. My masterbation to the stories here is normal.

And I am not alone.

Yes nick...it is normal..and your not alone..

 

[5by5]

i miss the days where it seemed no matter what was going on around us, we just longed for each other.

I keep hoping someday it will come back. But more and more I am not hopeful.

Even if it is just an online romance, I wish I could find someone who longed for me as I them.

I just want to reach through my phone and squeeze you as tight as i can. This hurts my heart so much and i dont even now you.

 

[LaurieB]

So what about marriages that aren't sexless, but are not enjoyable? I have struggled with the fact that my husband and I are two very different people sexually. He is perfectly satisfied with a 5-10 min., in and out thing while I lay there like a dead fish. It is not fun for me. I don't come anywhere close to an orgasm and yet he acts like everything is great. I suppose from his perspective it is, but from my perspective I want more. We've talked about what I want (a little rough sex, a little dirty talk, some kinkiness to spice things up), but he is physically incapable of doing any of that. He has tried, but it just comes across as fake and that kills the mood for me. I love him very much and am committed to staying with him, but geez....what do you do when you're just not compatible in one of the most important areas in a relationship?

 

[SgtSpiderMan]

So what about marriages that aren't sexless, but are not enjoyable? I have struggled with the fact that my husband and I are two very different people sexually. He is perfectly satisfied with a 5-10 min., in and out thing while I lay there like a dead fish. It is not fun for me. I don't come anywhere close to an orgasm and yet he acts like everything is great. I suppose from his perspective it is, but from my perspective I want more. We've talked about what I want (a little rough sex, a little dirty talk, some kinkiness to spice things up), but he is physically incapable of doing any of that. He has tried, but it just comes across as fake and that kills the mood for me. I love him very much and am committed to staying with him, but geez....what do you do when you're just not compatible in one of the most important areas in a relationship?

Maybe you need to rough him up a little first.....

 

[LaurieB]

Maybe you need to rough him up a little first.....

I think I'd be asked to get counseling and I've already been there and done that

 

[SgtSpiderMan]

I think I'd be asked to get counseling and I've already been there and done that

Sounds like your guy just isn't as fun as you'd like him to be. Sorry.

 

[AnnieLit]

Maybe you need to rough him up a little first.....

Sure, why not. The problem is, this is not going to make him a dominant all of a sudden, at best he likes and desides that is the way to go from now on. At worst he just shuts her down completely.

 

[ccs29745]

So what about marriages that aren't sexless, but are not enjoyable? I have struggled with the fact that my husband and I are two very different people sexually. He is perfectly satisfied with a 5-10 min., in and out thing while I lay there like a dead fish. It is not fun for me. I don't come anywhere close to an orgasm and yet he acts like everything is great. I suppose from his perspective it is, but from my perspective I want more. We've talked about what I want (a little rough sex, a little dirty talk, some kinkiness to spice things up), but he is physically incapable of doing any of that. He has tried, but it just comes across as fake and that kills the mood for me. I love him very much and am committed to staying with him, but geez....what do you do when you're just not compatible in one of the most important areas in a relationship?

Try to make or get him to go longer if possible. Making him might get rejection. Tell him you want multiple loads in you. Might take some coaxing, but see if he will.