Scorpio

[BoyNextDoor]

Scorpio (October 23-November 21) week of May 7, 2015

In the coming weeks, you may be as alluring and intriguing and tempting as you have been in a long time. I suggest you capitalize on this advantage. Proceed as if you do indeed have the power to attract more of the emotional riches you desire. Assume that you are primed to learn new secrets about the arts of intimacy, and that these secrets will make you even smarter and more soulful than you already are. Cultivate your ability to be the kind of trusted ally and imaginative lover who creates successful relationships.

 

[Wings]

Do me now!

Sagittarius.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

Do me now!

Sagittarius.

I read "do me now" and had a moment there. And then i realized you wanted your horoscope ...

Sagittarius (November 22-December 21) week of May 14, 2015

Sagittarian Matt Stutzman competes in the sport of archery. He's the world's record holder for longest accurate shot, having hit a target 230 yards away. What makes his accomplishment so extraordinary is the fact that he was born without any arms. He holds each arrow in his mouth and grasps the bow with his right foot and the help of a chest harness. In the spirit of this armless archer, and in accordance with your current astrological omens, I invite you to initiate an attempt to triumph over one of your so-called disadvantages.

 

[Tryharder62]

Do me now.....Oh I'll just do it myself like usual.

Mars has begun its transit of your soul sector, dear Cancer, and will continue to transit this area of your solar chart until June 24th. It's a strong cycle for reflection, taking action on private matters, and recognizing frustrations that have been operating just under the surface of things but that you haven't truly acknowledged until now. A lot may be going on behind the scenes or on the inside that you're not ready to share with others. You can experience unusual but compelling attractions and desires. Today, there can be some hard to define anger issues rising, particularly related to a significant person in your life. Even so, there is good energy for strategy and planning.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

Do me now.....Oh I'll just do it myself like usual.

Just sit back and let me do you now

Cancer (June 21-July 22) week of May 14, 2015

In mythic terms, you should be headed for the winner's circle, which is inside the pleasure dome. The parade in your honor should follow the award ceremony, and let's hope you will be on the lead float wearing a gold crown and holding a real magic wand while being sung to by a choir of people you love and who love you. If for any reason you are not experiencing some version of these metaphors, I urge you to find out why. Or better yet, get busy on planning a homecoming or graduation party or award ceremony for yourself. From an astrological perspective, you have a mandate to be recognized and appreciated for the gifts you offer the world.

 

[butters]

capricorn with coffee?

 

[Jennifer]

Scorpio (October 23-November 21) week of May 7, 2015

In the coming weeks, you may be as alluring and intriguing and tempting as you have been in a long time. I suggest you capitalize on this advantage. Proceed as if you do indeed have the power to attract more of the emotional riches you desire. Assume that you are primed to learn new secrets about the arts of intimacy, and that these secrets will make you even smarter and more soulful than you already are. Cultivate your ability to be the kind of trusted ally and imaginative lover who creates successful relationships.

This sounds like I wont end up in the wood chipper. Yay!!

 

[BoyNextDoor]

capricorn with coffee?

I am afraid it will have to be Capricorn with warm milk before bed. Traveling today and should alight by late evening.

 

[butters]

I am afraid it will have to be Capricorn with warm milk before bed. Traveling today and should alight by late evening.

safe traveling

 

[Sunshine]

Do me! Aquarius

 

[BoyNextDoor]

safe traveling

Capricorn (December 22-January 19) week of May 14, 2015

Long before Lou Reed recorded the song "Walk on the Wild Side," Nelson Algren wrote a novel titled A Walk on the Wild Side. It depicts the luxuriant depravity of New Orleans' French Quarter in the 1930s. One of Algren's most enduring bits of spiritual advice goes as follows: "Never, ever, no matter what else you do in your whole life, never sleep with anyone whose troubles are worse than your own." What do you think of that, Capricorn? Even if you don't regard it as a universal rule that you should unfailingly obey, I suggest you observe it in the coming weeks. For the sake of your mental hygiene, be extra discerning about what influences you absorb -- not just in bed, but everywhere.

I can think of a tome or two I should have observed this rule. I think I will have to read A Walk on the Wild Side.

 

[glynndah]

Scorpio (October 23-November 21) week of May 7, 2015

In the coming weeks, you may be as alluring and intriguing and tempting as you have been in a long time. I suggest you capitalize on this advantage. Proceed as if you do indeed have the power to attract more of the emotional riches you desire. Assume that you are primed to learn new secrets about the arts of intimacy, and that these secrets will make you even smarter and more soulful than you already are. Cultivate your ability to be the kind of trusted ally and imaginative lover who creates successful relationships.

This is just a clever way to lull me into a false sense of security so I'll be more likely to post my tits, isn't it?

 

[butters]

Capricorn (December 22-January 19) week of May 14, 2015

Long before Lou Reed recorded the song "Walk on the Wild Side," Nelson Algren wrote a novel titled A Walk on the Wild Side. It depicts the luxuriant depravity of New Orleans' French Quarter in the 1930s. One of Algren's most enduring bits of spiritual advice goes as follows: "Never, ever, no matter what else you do in your whole life, never sleep with anyone whose troubles are worse than your own." What do you think of that, Capricorn? Even if you don't regard it as a universal rule that you should unfailingly obey, I suggest you observe it in the coming weeks. For the sake of your mental hygiene, be extra discerning about what influences you absorb -- not just in bed, but everywhere.

I can think of a tome or two I should have observed this rule. I think I will have to read A Walk on the Wild Side.

i always brain-floss

 

[DesEsseintes]

Meanwhile, Psychic Bob intones his wisdom.

 

[butters]

Meanwhile, Psychic Bob intones his wisdom.

Capricorn (22 DEC-19 JAN)
No word from Channel 4 about your documentary series 24 Hours With A & E about a drug-fuelled marathon of uncomfortable sexual practices.


hahahahahaha

 

[Recidiva]

I'm a Pisces with a Gemini rising, which has always described me fairly well. Had a chart done once for fun by a friend.

My favorite Horoscope from "Good Omens" by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett

Based on speculation on the creation of the Earth:

"The Earth's a Libra.

The astrological prediction for Libra in the “Your Stars Today” column of the Tadfield Advertiser, on the day this history begins, read as follows:

LIBRA. 24 September.. 23 October.

You may be feeling run down and always in the same old daily round Home and family matters are highlighted and are hanging fire. Avoid unnecessary risks. A friend is important to you. Shelve major decisions until the way ahead seems clear. You may be vulnerable to a stomach upset today, so avoid salads. Help could come from an unexpected quarter.

This was perfectly correct on every count except for the bit about the salads."

 

[BoyNextDoor]

Scorpio (October 23-November 21) for week of June 25, 2015

The taskmaster planet Saturn wove its way through the sign of Scorpio from October 2012 until the end of 2014. Now it has slipped back into your sign for a last hurrah. Between now and mid-September. I urge you to milk its rigorous help in every way you can imagine. For example, cut away any last residues of trivial desires and frivolous ambitions. Hone your focus and streamline your self-discipline. Once and for all, withdraw your precious energy from activities that waste your time and resist your full engagement. And if you're serious about capitalizing on Saturn's demanding gifts, try this ritual: Write either "I will never squander my riches" or "I will make full use of my riches" twenty times -- whichever motivates you most.

I will make full use of my riches ... X-20

http://d3rm69wky8vagu.cloudfront.net/article-photos/large/1.157815.jpg
Yeah, BABY!

 

[Conager]

I read "do me now" and had a moment there. And then i realized you wanted your horoscope ...

That's how I read it. I assumed that she succumbed to your "alluring and intriguing and tempting" new vibe.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

Do me now!

Sagittarius.

Sagittarius (November 22-December 21) for week of June 25, 2015

The advanced lessons on tap in the coming days are not for the squeamish, the timid, the lazy, or the stubborn. But then you're not any of those things, right? So there shouldn't be a major problem. The purpose of these subterranean adventures and divine interventions is to teach you to make nerve-racking leaps of faith, whether or not you believe you're ready. Here's one piece of advice that I think will help: Don't resist and resent the tests as they appear. Rather, welcome them as blessings you don't understand yet. Be alert for the liberations they will offer.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

Do me now.....Oh I'll just do it myself like usual.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

In its early days, the band Depeche Mode had the infinitely boring name Composition of Sound. Humphrey Bogart's and Ingrid Bergman's classic 1942 film Casablanca was dangerously close to being called Everybody Come to Rick's. And before Charles Dickens published his novel Bleak House, a scathing critique of the 19th-century British judicial system, he considered eleven other possible titles, including the unfortunate Tom-all-Alone's. The Solitary House that was always shut up and never Lighted. I bring this to your attention, Cancerian, as the seeding phase of your personal cycle gets underway. The imprints you put on your budding creations will have a major impact on their future. Name them well. Give them a potent start.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

This is just a clever way to lull me into a false sense of security so I'll be more likely to post my tits, isn't it?

Yes

 

[BoyNextDoor]

Scorpio (October 23-November 21)
I'm a big fan of science and logic and objective thinking. Most of us need more of that good stuff. The world would be a saner, safer place if we all got regular lessons on how to be more reasonable and rational.

But in the immediate future, Scorpio, I'll steer you in a different direction. I believe you will benefit from injecting your imagination with primal raw crazy wild mojo. For example, you might read utopian science fiction and fairy tales about talking animals and poetry that scrambles your intellectual constructs. You could remember your dreams and ruminate about them as if they were revelations from the Great Beyond. You may also find it healthy to fantasize profusely about forbidden and impossible and hilarious adventures.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

Scorpio Horoscope for week of July 9, 2015

Verticle Oracle cardScorpio (October 23-November 21)

Between now and July 22, your password and mantra and battle cry is "serendipity." To make sure you are clear about its meaning, meditate on these definitions: a knack for uncovering surprising benefits by accident; a talent for stumbling upon timely help or useful resources without searching for them. Got that? Now I'll provide clues that should help you get the most out of your lucky breaks and blessed twists: 1. Be curious and receptive, not lackadaisical and entitled. 2. Expect the unexpected. Vow to thrive on surprises. 3. Your desires are more likely to come true if you are unattached to them coming true. But you should formulate those desires clearly and precisely.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

And this one is eerily appropriate.

Scorpio (October 23-November 21)
The poet Mary Ruefle describes reading books as "a great extension of time, a way for one person to live a thousand and one lives in a single lifespan." Are there other ways to do that? Watching films and plays and TV shows, of course. You can also listen to and empathize with people as they tell you their adventures. Or you can simply use your imagination to visualize what life is like for others. However you pursue this expansive pleasure, Scorpio, I highly recommend it. You are set up to absorb the equivalent of many years' experience in a few short weeks.

Of necessity, I must 'absorb the equivalent of many years' experience in a few short weeks' from over 200 people before Labor Day. Suggestions on how to do that welcomed and appreciated.

 

[SuprSalor]

Thought you were gonna talk about this guy..

http://elcondensadordefluzo.blogs.fotogramas.es/files/2014/09/Scorpio_with_Bont.png