role reversal

[rosebud5446]

on the complete other end of the spectrum from my other topic. i've always been the submissive person in the bedroom, but he wants me to be a little more dominant. he doesn't like pain like i do, but rough handling is good, but i really don't know what to say and do... i know he likes when i tug his hair, and he said ass slapping may be nice as long as it's not to hard, i just don't know how to be controlling. any ideas???

 

[midwestyankee]

on the complete other end of the spectrum from my other topic. i've always been the submissive person in the bedroom, but he wants me to be a little more dominant. he doesn't like pain like i do, but rough handling is good, but i really don't know what to say and do... i know he likes when i tug his hair, and he said ass slapping may be nice as long as it's not to hard, i just don't know how to be controlling. any ideas???

If you think that you might have a tough time ordering him around in what might seem like traditional dom/sub actions, maybe a softer start is in order. Consider telling him to pleasure you in whatever way you wish to be pleasured at the moment. Kiss me hard...please kiss my breasts now...mmm, lick my nipple...now the other one....stroke me....rub your cock here... I'm sure you get the idea. You don't have to make him do things that make you uncomfortable in order to take command. That's the beauty of having control: you get to tell him whatever you like. Later you can tell him to bark like a dog and beg for you when you spank him.

 

[TBKahuna123]

If you think that you might have a tough time ordering him around in what might seem like traditional dom/sub actions, maybe a softer start is in order. Consider telling him to pleasure you in whatever way you wish to be pleasured at the moment. Kiss me hard...please kiss my breasts now...mmm, lick my nipple...now the other one....stroke me....rub your cock here... I'm sure you get the idea. You don't have to make him do things that make you uncomfortable in order to take command. That's the beauty of having control: you get to tell him whatever you like. Later you can tell him to bark like a dog and beg for you when you spank him.

You know, something just hit me! I suddenly get what all these guys are asking for!

My wife is great and I wouldn't change anything about her, but she is naturally just wants me to decide what we're going to do, because she gets pleasure from anything we do. I love it when she tells me what she wants me to do, but that's not her standard opperating procedure, so to speak.

Could it be that when men ask their SO's to be more dominant, all they're really asking is for them to tell us what they want us to do to them? I mean come one, if there anything sexier than a woman telling you how and where she wants you to touch her? Hell in some ways, just hearing her say it is better than actually getting to do it!

Well, ok almost.

 

[Chicklet]

I'm submissive and I'm always the first to say "touch me here, hurt me here, tweak me here..." = p

Midwest has some good ideas there.

I'm thinking, maybe it'd really excite your guy if you put your hand in his hair while he was going down on you. Control his head, move him up and down to where you want to be licked... that could be a thrill for him. Maybe if he's on top of you during sex, you could wrap your legs around him and control the movement, squeeze his ass from that position, and smack it a little to speed or slow the thrusts.

Now I want sex. Damnit!

 

[Chicklet]

Also, maybe he'd like a collar for sex. It's a huge turn on to feel a collar tugged up or down or to the side, very gently, just a reminder that the control is there. Kissing him with your hand through a D-Ring, using it to guide his face to parts of your body. Some fun possibilities.

 

[KarenDee]

Hmmm, finally a topic I have some recent experience with! Yes, he's wanted me to do something very similar. I think you really have to experiment to see what works and what doesn't. Believe me, when you hit a "hot button" you will definitely know it!! I began by asking him to lie down and just let me please him, but the one rule I made was that he was not allowed to touch me. He had to let me do everything, my way, and at my pace.

I began by slowly kissing him all over. Don't dive right away for the strike zone, but spend lots of time on his feet, his legs, arms, tummy, well you get the idea...everywhere. If you want to see an intense state of arousal, purposely avoid touching him "there" and instead just work all around it. You will sense his body just shaking and burning for you to take him in your mouth or wrap your fingers around him. The longer you avoid this, and the more you tease, the greater the eroticism...for both of you. It will be hard (ooops...sorry!) to do but the rewards are unreal if you can hold off.

When you finally go in for the "kill" take it nice and slow here too. Lick him gently up and down...touching him with your tongue only. Nice, slow, even strokes, soft wet kisses, little noises that let him know what you're doing. Ask him to keep his eyes closed and tell him to "feel" instead of "watch." Do everything in slow motion, trying to delay things as long as possible. Depending on the situation, this may not happen. You might get him so wound up that he simply explodes in an orgasmic volcano. Yes!!! And you know what? He will be all over you with love and kisses and a declaration that you are absolutely the most wonderful lover he has ever known, that you are the keys to his heart, and that he cannot live without you. Quite a confidence boosting performance, to say the least!

Sorry I may have gotten a little carried away, but basically it boils down to using your imagination, taking some extra time, and learning make love to his mind instead of his body.

Good luck, and tell us it if works!