Respond with Monty Python

Kevin-Philips Bong. You polled no votes at all. Not a sausage. How does that make you feel?
 
Kevin-Philips Bong. You polled no votes at all. Not a sausage. How does that make you feel?

Not at all. As I always say
Climb every mountain
Ford every stream,
Follow every by-way,
Till you find your dream.
 
Democracy stems from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
 
Not at all. As I always say
Climb every mountain
Ford every stream,
Follow every by-way,
Till you find your dream.

👏👏

Pointed stick? Oh, oh, oh. We want to learn how to defend ourselves against pointed sticks, do we? Getting all high and mighty, eh? Fresh fruit not good enough for you eh? Well I'll tell you something my lad. When you're walking home tonight and some homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don't come crying to me! Now, the passion fruit. When your assailant lunges at you with a passion fruit...
 
How to defend yourself against a man armed with a banana...
First you force him to drop the banana. Next, you eat the banana., thus disarming him. You have now rendered him helpless!

(follow-up to Taten's post :cattail:)
 
How to defend yourself against a man armed with a banana...
First you force him to drop the banana. Next, you eat the banana., thus disarming him. You have now rendered him helpless!

(follow-up to Taten's post :cattail:)

Love it!

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition. Our chief weapon is surprise; surprise and fear. Our two chief weapons are surprise and fear and ruthless efficiency. Our three main weapons are surprise, dear, ruthless efficiency and an almost fanatical devotion to the pope. Damn it!
 
Customer: I've definitely had enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not half an hour ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it being tired and shagged out following a prolonged squawk.

Shop Owner: Well, he's...he's...ah...probably pining for the fjords.
 
"Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries...I fart in your general direction."
 
Follow me. Follow me. That's good, that's good! A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat!
 
Stan: I want to be a woman. From now on I want you all to call me Loretta.
Reg: What!?
Stan: It's my right as a man.
Judith: Why do you want to be Loretta, Stan?
Stan: I want to have babies.
Reg: You want to have babies?!?!?!
Stan: It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
Reg: But you can't have babies.
Stan: Don't you oppress me.
Reg: I'm not oppressing you, Stan -- you haven't got a womb. Where's the
fetus going to gestate? You going to keep it in a box?
(Stan starts crying.)
Judith: Here! I've got an idea. Suppose you agree that he can't actually
have babies, not having a womb, which is nobody's fault, not even the
Romans', but that he can have the *right* to have babies.
Francis: Good idea, Judith. We shall fight the oppressors for your right to
have babies, brother. Sister, sorry.
Reg: (pissed) What's the *point*?
Francis: What?
Reg: What's the point of fighting for his right to have babies, when he
can't have babies?
Francis: It is symbolic of our struggle against oppression.
Reg: It's symbolic of his struggle against reality
 
Minister: It's not particularly silly, is it? I mean, the right leg isn't silly at all and the left leg merely does a forward aerial half turn every alternate step.

Mr. Pudey: Yes, but I think that with Government backing I could make it very silly.
 
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