bluntforcemama
Aqua Vulva
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Why does it have to hurt so much? I was rejected because the person was afraid of being associated with me.
Rejection
- Thread starter bluntforcemama
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Willing and Unsure
Stuffed Animal Princess
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because rejecting you is someone's way of showing that they dont care for you the same way you care for them.
Marxist
Literotica Guru
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Myst said:
"Associated" what the hell does that mean? Was he looking to buy insurance or be a friend? Do you deal drugs, use drugs, eat poo, or work for Time Warner AOL? I'll be your friend as long as you're a kind, neat, considerate person.
Ok, you only have to be considerate.
MissTaken
Biker Chick
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I am sorry to hear that Myst. While I could make a variety of points including that anyone that shallow does not know you or deserve you, I know that it hurts nonetheless.
Why does rejection hurt? Well, for me, it sends me a resounding message that I am "not good enough." No one likes to feel that way. People like us try to be the best we can be, and when shunned, even for ridiculous reasons, take it to heart.
I wish I had the wisdom and words to make you feel better. I don't, but I do know that you are worthy and very special. You are plenty "good enough."
Take care and Hugs,
Miss T
Why does rejection hurt? Well, for me, it sends me a resounding message that I am "not good enough." No one likes to feel that way. People like us try to be the best we can be, and when shunned, even for ridiculous reasons, take it to heart.
I wish I had the wisdom and words to make you feel better. I don't, but I do know that you are worthy and very special. You are plenty "good enough."
Take care and Hugs,
Miss T
G
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bluntforcemama
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I see it as someone who doesn't want to be associated with me because I'm in touch with my own sexuality, and I'm not afraid to speak about taboo things, I suppose. Maybe I'm too forward. I'm too "hardcore." Understand, but at the same time, I can't accept it.
Juspar and I are fine. This is about my artwork and a dealer.
Juspar and I are fine. This is about my artwork and a dealer.
G
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Shy Tall Guy
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Phew! I am glad to hear that - although I imagine that probably 99% of the men on this board secretly lust after you and wish Juspar was out of the wayMyst said:
In that case, given the reasons - I would say the person is afraid of you and is acting in a cowardly manner because they value other's people opinions more than they value what is right. Or they could just be narrow minded themselves.
There are a lot of people in the world who are that way. Don't think of it as rejection, think of it as their minds and eyes being so closed that they can't see anything past their blinders. In the long run, it is their loss, not yours.
Like I always tell my daughter; continue on and ignore them, they are not worth your consideration. You are better than them, and the best revenge is doing well and rubbing their nose in it. When the world in general accepts you and gives you acclaim, they will kick themselves in the ass for not accepting you.
Now go out there and kick some ass yourself - show them how much better you are than they could ever imagine!
cymbidia
unrepentant pervert
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Myst, you're a wonderful woman.
You're charming and intelligent and open-minded.
You know it.
You're centered with that knowledge.
Others have their own issues, their own ideas of what';s good and right and acceptable as far as a partner goes. You won't fit their ideas all the time, just as they won't fit yours.
Such is life. You fucking well just wait for someone who will appreciate you for the undeniably strong and honest woman that you are. Don't settle.
When we put our hopes and dreams into someone or something and it doesn't work out, we hurt for the loss of those hopes and dreams. Let it hurt. Ride the hurt out until it begins to hurt less. Then start looking around again.
Like a pot in a kiln, Myst, we cannot be a whole person without some heat and pain to strengthen and temper us.
And a woman spoke, saying, "Tell us of Pain."
And he said:
Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the sun, so must you know pain.
You're charming and intelligent and open-minded.
You know it.
You're centered with that knowledge.
Others have their own issues, their own ideas of what';s good and right and acceptable as far as a partner goes. You won't fit their ideas all the time, just as they won't fit yours.
Such is life. You fucking well just wait for someone who will appreciate you for the undeniably strong and honest woman that you are. Don't settle.
When we put our hopes and dreams into someone or something and it doesn't work out, we hurt for the loss of those hopes and dreams. Let it hurt. Ride the hurt out until it begins to hurt less. Then start looking around again.
Like a pot in a kiln, Myst, we cannot be a whole person without some heat and pain to strengthen and temper us.
And a woman spoke, saying, "Tell us of Pain."
And he said:
Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the sun, so must you know pain.
cymbidia
unrepentant pervert
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Well, fuck, Myst.
And that was the most positive thing i've said all day, too.
Okay then...
Handling professional rejection is never easy. The most important thing to remember is to remain positive and believe that "one more rejection is one step closer to an acceptance". When the rejection is made by telephone or in person, ask the person you're talking to for the reason why your stuff was rejected.
- Listen carefully to every word they say.
- Don't get into an argument; the object is to learn about the negative perceptions that resulted in the rejection.
- After they finish, ask politely for another opportunity to show them your work, work that they might like better.
- It is very important to remain extremely professional.
If the person declines, don't get discouraged, at least you had the gumption to ask. Congratulate yourself for that. However, the gallery owner (or whoever) will probably be impressed with your "guts" in the face of rejection, and may well yes. If this is the case, make sure you do your homework and prepare to show them something they really want to see.
Maybe you need to polish your presentation skills, be more proactive, relaxed or communicate clearer or slower. You cannot expect your work to always speak for you.
And that was the most positive thing i've said all day, too.
Okay then...
Handling professional rejection is never easy. The most important thing to remember is to remain positive and believe that "one more rejection is one step closer to an acceptance". When the rejection is made by telephone or in person, ask the person you're talking to for the reason why your stuff was rejected.
- Listen carefully to every word they say.
- Don't get into an argument; the object is to learn about the negative perceptions that resulted in the rejection.
- After they finish, ask politely for another opportunity to show them your work, work that they might like better.
- It is very important to remain extremely professional.
If the person declines, don't get discouraged, at least you had the gumption to ask. Congratulate yourself for that. However, the gallery owner (or whoever) will probably be impressed with your "guts" in the face of rejection, and may well yes. If this is the case, make sure you do your homework and prepare to show them something they really want to see.
Maybe you need to polish your presentation skills, be more proactive, relaxed or communicate clearer or slower. You cannot expect your work to always speak for you.
bluntforcemama
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Polishing those people skills...
Well, I know I can be scathing at times, but I thought I was quite charming. Maybe I was rejected because in the wake of conservativism, I'm controversial. The art is so limited out here in cowboy land. I should probably get further away and into a more liberal part of the country. But I'll keep the "obediant" attitude in mind and be sure to polish those people skills some more.
Well, I know I can be scathing at times, but I thought I was quite charming. Maybe I was rejected because in the wake of conservativism, I'm controversial. The art is so limited out here in cowboy land. I should probably get further away and into a more liberal part of the country. But I'll keep the "obediant" attitude in mind and be sure to polish those people skills some more.
YogiBare
Not Your Average Bare
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Myst, this is a no brainer ...
Your experience is what happens to artists (and scientists and politicians and ...) who push the envelope of public acceptability and who are ahead of the curve. Remember - the feedback wasn't that your work is no good - or even that it wouldn't sell. The public's willingness to embrace avante garde artistic sexuality is increasing all the time. This person was a bad match for you. You'll find a dealer with vision and courage who will back you all the way. Find that person.
Can I get your autograph tattooed on my rear end?
Your experience is what happens to artists (and scientists and politicians and ...) who push the envelope of public acceptability and who are ahead of the curve. Remember - the feedback wasn't that your work is no good - or even that it wouldn't sell. The public's willingness to embrace avante garde artistic sexuality is increasing all the time. This person was a bad match for you. You'll find a dealer with vision and courage who will back you all the way. Find that person.
Can I get your autograph tattooed on my rear end?
LordMagicMan
Lord of the Morning
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Defently need to get out of cattle country if you want to be a liberal artist... Its harder times we live in, maybe he wanted to say that rather then they couldnt afford you.. Not sure why but hay some people dont think before they speak.
sexy-girl
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i agree with what people have been saying really but wanted to add
rejection is a two way street ... if he rejected you then he's not right for you .... you are a excellant artist and im sure having a unique style will help you in the long run because there are quite a few artists out there i imagine ... maybe because of your unique style you might suffer a few rejections
but when you find this art dealer that is right for you ... you'll just shine i know it
rejection is a two way street ... if he rejected you then he's not right for you .... you are a excellant artist and im sure having a unique style will help you in the long run because there are quite a few artists out there i imagine ... maybe because of your unique style you might suffer a few rejections
but when you find this art dealer that is right for you ... you'll just shine i know it
G
Guest
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Ah, rejection. My biggest fear.
Myst, you dear, are brave. You take the risks. Don't worry. The perfect fit will find you( good thoughts sexy-girl). Until then, don't let go of who you are. Never settle.
I wish I had your balls. I won't even attempt the risk.
Myst, you dear, are brave. You take the risks. Don't worry. The perfect fit will find you( good thoughts sexy-girl). Until then, don't let go of who you are. Never settle.
I wish I had your balls. I won't even attempt the risk.
Shy Tall Guy
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Come back to Seattle where "liberal" artists thrive. If I am not mistaken you would be closer to Juspar when he comes back to BC.Myst said:
Cheyenne
Ms. Smarty Pantsless
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Myst, I'm not an artist so I'm just guessing. I do buy artwork though. Is it maybe not so much a case of you being rejected as it is that the dealer just has different taste than you?
If I'm buying art, no amount of people skills or presentation packaging is going to make me fall in love with something that just isn't my taste in art. It's an emotional connection that is there, or it's not. Or is that just me? I have to fall in love with a piece and really really want it before I'll buy it.
If I'm buying art, no amount of people skills or presentation packaging is going to make me fall in love with something that just isn't my taste in art. It's an emotional connection that is there, or it's not. Or is that just me? I have to fall in love with a piece and really really want it before I'll buy it.
erosman
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amazed
I continue to be amazed, that I'm amazed at the incredible insight and responsiveness of this place.
Myst,
I don't know your art, but your choice of friends is outstanding.
If your art is a reflection of your soul, and I would guess that it is, just focus on reflecting with a passionate accuracy. The art is what flows from inside. It's not fabricated. It's an extension of your thoughts, ideas, passions, emotions, etc. Your call is to be true and veritable in your expression of all that you are. It's your unique design...your signature!
This dagger of disappointment that is cutting you so deeply has another edge as well. The emotional pain can expose you to new heights of self-consciousness, and the result can be a deeper well of experience to draw from as you compose.
As for the rejection, it's an artist's lot. When you expose yourself in artistic expression, you scare the hell out of comfortable, static people. It's universal.
I think Stephen Covey is credited with saying, "Every no brings you closer to the yes." Relish the no's. Let them make you better...not bitter.
I continue to be amazed, that I'm amazed at the incredible insight and responsiveness of this place.
Myst,
I don't know your art, but your choice of friends is outstanding.
If your art is a reflection of your soul, and I would guess that it is, just focus on reflecting with a passionate accuracy. The art is what flows from inside. It's not fabricated. It's an extension of your thoughts, ideas, passions, emotions, etc. Your call is to be true and veritable in your expression of all that you are. It's your unique design...your signature!
This dagger of disappointment that is cutting you so deeply has another edge as well. The emotional pain can expose you to new heights of self-consciousness, and the result can be a deeper well of experience to draw from as you compose.
As for the rejection, it's an artist's lot. When you expose yourself in artistic expression, you scare the hell out of comfortable, static people. It's universal.
I think Stephen Covey is credited with saying, "Every no brings you closer to the yes." Relish the no's. Let them make you better...not bitter.
Lost Cause
It's a wrap!
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Myst,
Rejection happens when things don't work out to our expectations. You should congratulate yourself by just taking the risk to start a friendship/relationship. That is the hardest thing any human (or sub species) has to initiate.
It hurts inside because you know how great and enjoyable it would be, but the other doesn't want risk it.
Sounds like they are influenced more by what others think. That makes them live their life for the opinion of the others. Woe to them for ignoring the chance of a great thing, for the fleeting approval of people that do not think that person can live life for it's richness, and joy.
Keep on being you.
Rejection happens when things don't work out to our expectations. You should congratulate yourself by just taking the risk to start a friendship/relationship. That is the hardest thing any human (or sub species) has to initiate.
It hurts inside because you know how great and enjoyable it would be, but the other doesn't want risk it.
Sounds like they are influenced more by what others think. That makes them live their life for the opinion of the others. Woe to them for ignoring the chance of a great thing, for the fleeting approval of people that do not think that person can live life for it's richness, and joy.
Keep on being you.
MissTaken
Biker Chick
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- Jun 30, 2001
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Not only is rejection of our creative skills far more hurtful because it is an extension of our selves, the passing of judgment over our work is subjective.
Frankly, whomever said and did this to you in all likelihood lacks an openess of mind and was crass in his/her personal assault ...."association with you".
Again, I am sorry that you had to feel this way, but he/she doesn't sound like someone who truly understands the creative process.
Perhaps off the topic, perhaps not, it is unfortunate that today, there are times when those who are responsible for selling/dealing/promoting artwork, try to take the work and make it fit into a set of expectations and guidelines. Is it really art if we do so. An example: my mother wrote a children's story in which the main character was experiencing conflict. The story ends with the teen and her mother working together. The story was turned down and she was told to resubmit with the teen solving the problem herself or with her peers. Sounds silly.....but......
I digress.
Take care Myst!
Frankly, whomever said and did this to you in all likelihood lacks an openess of mind and was crass in his/her personal assault ...."association with you".
Again, I am sorry that you had to feel this way, but he/she doesn't sound like someone who truly understands the creative process.
Perhaps off the topic, perhaps not, it is unfortunate that today, there are times when those who are responsible for selling/dealing/promoting artwork, try to take the work and make it fit into a set of expectations and guidelines. Is it really art if we do so. An example: my mother wrote a children's story in which the main character was experiencing conflict. The story ends with the teen and her mother working together. The story was turned down and she was told to resubmit with the teen solving the problem herself or with her peers. Sounds silly.....but......
I digress.
Take care Myst!
Cheyenne
Ms. Smarty Pantsless
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Any chance you could post some of your artwork here for us to see/enjoy like Starfish and a few others do? I enjoy seeing the creative side of the members. I can't draw a straight line, so I'm always amazed at artistic talent in others.
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