Questions on "let's just have sex" dating sites.

[RuzieD]

Hey all.

I'm in a new town. I'm single. I'd like to have sex more frequently if for no other reason than to get better at it.

I have a profile on a more relationship oriented dating site. I've had conversations, but no dates yet. I did meet some cool people on it during in the last city I lived in.

Thing is, I am not totally interested in being in a long term relationship. At least not now. I am a lot more interested in casual sex. I've thought about signed up for a website that's a bit more orientated to that.

There have to be people on this website that have done that kind of thing. I'm curious about it, but I've also felt like I've wasted money on dating sites. I am not sure how to approach such a site.

Is there any advice anyone can give or experience that you'd like to share?

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Hey all.

I'm in a new town. I'm single. I'd like to have sex more frequently if for no other reason than to get better at it.

I have a profile on a more relationship oriented dating site. I've had conversations, but no dates yet. I did meet some cool people on it during in the last city I lived in.

Thing is, I am not totally interested in being in a long term relationship. At least not now. I am a lot more interested in casual sex. I've thought about signed up for a website that's a bit more orientated to that.

There have to be people on this website that have done that kind of thing. I'm curious about it, but I've also felt like I've wasted money on dating sites. I am not sure how to approach such a site.

Is there any advice anyone can give or experience that you'd like to share?

Shouldn't you be in bed? There's school tomorrow.

 

[RuzieD]

Misanthrope indeed.

 

[CandiCame]

I've always been too chickenshit to try on-line dating. Scared I'll wake up without a kidney or something.

Maybe I watch too much Who the Fuck Did I Marry.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Misanthrope indeed.

You looked it up, didn't you?

 

[richard_daily]

Misanthrope indeed.

Yeah, old dudes are generally misanthropic.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Yeah, old dudes are generally misanthropic.

Give the boy some advice, learned one.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Way to go, Richard. You scared him away. Now he'll never learn how to have sex.

 

[richard_daily]

Way to go, Richard. You scared him away. Now he'll never learn how to have sex.

Is that why you keep making female profiles and coming on here getting veteman to cyber you?

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Is that why you keep making female profiles and coming on here getting veteman to cyber you?

Why? Are you needing someone to talk to?

 

[richard_daily]

Why? Are you needing someone to talk to?

I'm good, thanks. I'll be out with an actual woman in an hour...

You'll still be here trolling for dudes to cyber.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

I'm good, thanks. I'll be out with an actual woman in an hour...

You'll still be here trolling for dudes to cyber.

Isn't it way past your bedtime too or did you and Ruzie hook up? Reci will be jealous as hell.

 

[RuzieD]

I've always been too chickenshit to try on-line dating. Scared I'll wake up without a kidney or something.

Maybe I watch too much Who the Fuck Did I Marry.

Haha... Yeah... wake up without a Kidney.

It is not so bad if you met and vet someone in person. Still though, sites that a straight to the sex perhaps invite a whole different type of person.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Haha... Yeah... wake up without a Kidney.

It is not so bad if you met and vet someone in person. Still though, sites that a straight to the sex perhaps invite a whole different type of person.

Hey, you're back. I 'm glad you didn't hook up with Richard.

 

[Desiremakesmeweak]

Different around the world

RuzieD,

I believe it is acknowledged by those who know, that the outlooks and initial or outward behaviour of people is different from place to place around the world. The whole question you raise is not so crystal clear or clearcut a thing when you compare the social attitudes of various people, when taken generally as a particular group in their locations.

In fact, I would go so far as to say it is TOTALLY different - and this is going to have a lot of impact on fairly unconditional sex for money or just plain sex for sex.

There are places where I would regard the people as limited in their knowledge, yet who behave as if they know virtually everything (large parts of the USA), and there are those places where they literally behave as if they know nothing at all (and probably do know pretty much nothing!!). There are places that are very cold, sexually/socially and they will give you the impression there is something wrong with you - and there are other places that will make you feel you are a sex god!

There are those places where the general social warmth is obvious and there are a lot of social events and people have a confident and out-going manner (South Africa) and therefore where the concept of bought commercial sex implies normalcy problems of some type.

There are places where there is a definite social/sexual class mentality (Melbourne and Sydney) and where there are kind of 'sexual tribal' groupings (Melb and Syd again). There are huge sexual undergrounds there where opportunity for sex is fairly high, I would say.

"Lets just have sex" dating sites as far as the web is concerned is something that exploits the 'distance' in a physical sense and gets people to make positive presumptions that they might not in face-to-face circumstances.

Europe is highly diverse in that there are numerous strata of entirely different and unconnected 'styles' of sexual engaging by people - I don't think it is possible to link ALL the processes where money forms some component of sex into one simple case. I don't think there is enough space to go into THIS region's story right here and now...

However, all in all, I have one 'word of advice' as it were that I might offer to you - 'sex-for-money' or 'just sex via web connecting' misses one very very very important point that has to do with sex generally: people who are sex-ready, or sexually available just for the motivation of sex, or are sexually very self-confident such that they will contemplate a variety of partners, are easily discernible by other similar people. Whereas 'sex-for-money' is about people who are focussed on and interested in money.

If you desire sex and satisfying sex, you want to be sexually open-minded yourself firstly, and then have your eyes open to notice other people and what they want and what they are doing and signalling.

It's all too easy for someone with a vast amount of worldy experience to say 'go here' or 'contact here' or whatever - and that seems like being mean to say this, but, you will find that in an important sense it's not about experience at all, it is all about your own personal outlook.

I can tell you this much - I have never, NEVER, met anyone inside the professional or let's say skilfully sex-active scenes anywhere, who is/was not a really really nice person, even if they might have had flaws of one kind or another, and who did not have an immensely caring and decent attitude towards other people.

If you are a really nice person, who cares about others, and is sensitive to their needs, wants, and desires, and that also means I guess the ability to be and remain discreet in certain cases, YOU ARE GOING TO GET LAID.

Start out from that attitudinal base, and you will find that you can answer your own questions with your own mindset.

DMMWk.

 

[Sinny]

I used one site briefly when I was in a weird place, post divorce, but not quite ready to dip back into the dating game, so to speak. I never wound up doing anything casual, I actually met someone and we had a brief, but committed, relationship and then I entered a very successful LTR. Still, I met several men, vetted them and was pretty serious about the whole process. Here are the rules I established for myself:

* Don't fuck married men. Bad idea. Be careful about your process. MANY of them lie and say they are single. No cell phone number = married. Inability to talk in the evening = married. Do NOT fuck a married man, it will be awful for everyone involved. You may want a casual thing, but you need to make sure it doesn't come with nuclear level drama.

* Get their first and last name and a phone number, an approximate birth date if you can. If they won't supply that, you are entering a risky situation, in my opinion. Public records are your friend. You can find arrest records and basic criminal information, or, hey! marriage records. If you are inviting someone into your home and fucking them, you need assurance they aren't going to beat and rape you. Remember that.

* Be honest that you don't want a ltr. They need to know the relationship comes with an expiration date and it is only sex.

* Get tested. Get a full panel of everything. Do not risk your health for some dumb guy. Use condoms and take the pill. Getting pregnant will suck. Bad. But you already knew that.

Be safe, good luck. Think it through.

 

[Colonel Hogan]

You live in Vegas and can't get laid? Man, you really DO need to get better at it!

 

[RuzieD]

You live in Vegas and can't get laid? Man, you really DO need to get better at it!

I've lived here less than a month, and my crap is still in boxes. Didn't even have a proper bed until last week. Hard to get laid if you don't have a bed.

 

[IrezumiKiss]

I used one site briefly when I was in a weird place, post divorce, but not quite ready to dip back into the dating game, so to speak. I never wound up doing anything casual, I actually met someone and we had a brief, but committed, relationship and then I entered a very successful LTR. Still, I met several men, vetted them and was pretty serious about the whole process. Here are the rules I established for myself:

* Don't fuck married men. Bad idea. Be careful about your process. MANY of them lie and say they are single. No cell phone number = married. Inability to talk in the evening = married. Do NOT fuck a married man, it will be awful for everyone involved. You may want a casual thing, but you need to make sure it doesn't come with nuclear level drama.

* Get their first and last name and a phone number, an approximate birth date if you can. If they won't supply that, you are entering a risky situation, in my opinion. Public records are your friend. You can find arrest records and basic criminal information, or, hey! marriage records. If you are inviting someone into your home and fucking them, you need assurance they aren't going to beat and rape you. Remember that.

* Be honest that you don't want a ltr. They need to know the relationship comes with an expiration date and it is only sex.

* Get tested. Get a full panel of everything. Do not risk your health for some dumb guy. Use condoms and take the pill. Getting pregnant will suck. Bad. But you already knew that.

Be safe, good luck. Think it through.

This needs to be a sticky.

I've lived here less than a month, and my crap is still in boxes. Didn't even have a proper bed until last week. Hard to get laid if you don't have a bed.

Not really. If you're giving up the sweet stuff, a guy will be proactive in his lust to bone you and bring a blanket and throw pillows to lay down on the floor.

 

[lovetoread]

I used one site briefly when I was in a weird place, post divorce, but not quite ready to dip back into the dating game, so to speak. I never wound up doing anything casual, I actually met someone and we had a brief, but committed, relationship and then I entered a very successful LTR. Still, I met several men, vetted them and was pretty serious about the whole process. Here are the rules I established for myself:

* Don't fuck married men. Bad idea. Be careful about your process. MANY of them lie and say they are single. No cell phone number = married. Inability to talk in the evening = married. Do NOT fuck a married man, it will be awful for everyone involved. You may want a casual thing, but you need to make sure it doesn't come with nuclear level drama.

* Get their first and last name and a phone number, an approximate birth date if you can. If they won't supply that, you are entering a risky situation, in my opinion. Public records are your friend. You can find arrest records and basic criminal information, or, hey! marriage records. If you are inviting someone into your home and fucking them, you need assurance they aren't going to beat and rape you. Remember that.

* Be honest that you don't want a ltr. They need to know the relationship comes with an expiration date and it is only sex.

* Get tested. Get a full panel of everything. Do not risk your health for some dumb guy. Use condoms and take the pill. Getting pregnant will suck. Bad. But you already knew that.

Be safe, good luck. Think it through.

Entering LTR should always be a thorough process...

 

[BotanyBoy]

"Get tested. Get a full panel of everything. Do not risk your health "

That's pretty much it right there for me.

Healthy and horny people should totally fuck for sport.