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Squirrelly extraterrestrial bipod has been trying to avoid me like I’m a bill collector.
Dashes away from Martians and claims they are hiding.
He's the Martian version of Typhoid Mary, exiled to Earth. Is he contagious to humans? He doesn't know and doesn't care.
His great-great-great aunt was the mistress of the brother of the guy who once worked at a deli with the third cousin (once removed) of J Robert Oppenheimer.
Cross my heart.
His website says he invented the internet.
His great-great-great aunt was the mistress of the brother of the guy who once worked at a deli with the third cousin (once removed) of J Robert Oppenheimer.
Cross my heart.
Actually, my father claims to have met Robert Oppenheimer in New Mexico in the late 30's.
Thinks his father met a guy whose third cousin (once removed) once worked at a deli with a guy whose brother had an illicit trust or two (or eight) with his great-great-great-aunt.
Thinks he saw Elvis taking a piss at an Interstate rest stop in Missouri.
Makes giant mosaics out of dead bugs, sells them on ebay as ancient native art.
His dream vacation is a one-way ticket to Walla Walla, Washington.
Confuses Walla Walla with Nano Nano and comdom use.
She was born with only 7 toes - six on one foot and one on the other. But it's worked well for her - she hasn't had to worry about those nasty pervs that have a foot fetish.
Lobbied for a silly walk curriculum to be part of Common Core.
Recruited as a tight end but failed the finger wave.
Sells crotchless golf pants on Etsy
Puts out after "Hello"
Writes love letters to Jane Goodall.
Writes love letters to Jane Goodall.
Writes love letters to Jane Goodall.
Writes love letters to Jane Goodall.
*My apologies to the 9:35 posts but I can't straighten that out*
Raises cocks fir fighting, even has her own cockpit in her back yard.
Was arrested for cock fighting, had the biggest pecker in the ring