Positive Vibrations

[Killishandra]

I read through the sequence of posts out of curiosity since this was revived a week or so ago, and I would like to offer a different perspective.

There have been about 15-20 people post to this, and about 12-15 have contributed positive thoughts about those who they enjoyed talking to here. And you know what? With a few outliers tossed in, most of the respondents are saying nice things about.... the other respondents.

Not especially unexpected, but think about it.

There was a survey a couple months ago about the chemistry here and why many people tend to stay away or not have much to say. While most everyone said things were pretty much OK and good, it was the people who DIDN'T respond because they weren't here that you should think about. Sort of the "Dewey Defeats Truman" result from doing an election survey among people who had telephones, when telephones were more of an upper-class luxury.

The "inner circle" focus of this forum is part of the reason for that.



And that's it exactly. Postive vibes are fine, but you should look at the larger picture, too. And moderators and high-volume posters who reinforce the "inner circle" image do everyone a disservice.


Sin.

I do expect to be chided about "if you can't stand the heat..." and about about being afraid to jump in the pool and swim, etc. for saying this, but I felt the elephant standing in the middle of the room was too big to ignore.

First of all, I tend to agree with Sir Winston in regards to why people who get mentioned in this thread tend to be the respondents... It has alot to do with mentioning who you're most familiar with, who you're close friends with. Who you have a good insight into and can say nice things about. In order for people to get to know you, you must post, and people who post are... the people most likely to respond to a thread (aka... posting. ) You and KC have a point in noticing that outsiders tend to get easily overlooked, although I must add that is normally somewhat time-limited. The more they post, the better their posts (as in thoughtful and well-written, not as in the "quality" of their opinions,) and the longer they stick around the MORE they will be noticed and paid attention to.

Alot of the people in this forum (and I exclude myself here, as I'm a relative newcomer) have been talking to each other for, literally, years. They call each other (in some instances,) they have each other on instant messanging, and they even fall in love and develop relationships beyond friendship and beyond the internet. You can't help but have somewhat of an "inner circle" when people are that close to each other and that committed to their friendships.

This is NOT to say that we as a group wouldn't benefit from paying more attention to new posters. I'm just stating some of the *reasons* these things happen... I'm not saying it's a good excuse for the behavior.

All that aside... I must point out that your post is a bit negative overall, considering this is the "positive vibes" thread. (Trying to make a funny... alright, just shoot me.

 

[serijules]

I was really hesitant about posting to this thread because I did feel it would create a sort of "clique" feel and I tend to try to avoid that or making others feel like that. Once I DID post, there were a bunch of people I mentioned but ended up erasing because while I noticed them and enjoyed their posts, I don't know them well enough to really put a finger on *why* I like them or what it is about them that I like and it seemed stupid to write a blurb about one person and then just say "so and so, um..i like your posts.". So thus, I stuck with the people I'm most familiar with for the most part. It was a lot harder than I thought it would be, and I really don't know a heck of a lot of people on here very well! I'm not really sure how everyone else gets to know each other better the way they do, I've missed that bus I think.

 

[jasonlf]

I was only mentioned once *cries*

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

catalina:because she has never been anything other than a well spoken, honest and forthright individual...which is hard to find in real life or the net...

Unca Rosco: the man who helped me focus when I was fucked up, He has listened to me whine, given great advice and been the perfect long distance friend in need...I miss Him...

the girls: snowy, shy, KC there have been times when my life has been less then perfect. Yet coming to the boards and seeing these ladies at their most outrageous eases the tenseness. I need that sometimes and they have never failed to provide. I wish I could have been lucky enough to have met any of the 3 in person and tried to make them Mine...

Netzach and Shadowsdream have always provided hours of serious reading. They are both extremely knowledgable, not to mention sexy as all get out. I aspire to have myself together as well as they do...one day soon

vixandra_si and cellis 2 women who have given me love and support from clear across the US...I don't know how I ever survived without em but I am so glad I have them now. I love you, both...

Newest additions

Marquis The thing about this man is simple...he is upfront and blunt if he has a problem with somthing that is written by another poster. He also has a killer sense of humor and a hot bod..what's not to like?

Killi One of my favorite people, not because she is witty or hawt..(though she is) but because she is caring and quite sensitive to the needs of others. She dropped a few PM's when I was down. I will never ever forget that.

Sir Winston I remember how quick this man is to speak his piece in defense of those he respects. I also recall how much I have enjoyed reading his posts. A stand up guy and all around good Dominant male. *doffs hat and curtsies*. You rock!!

A few posters I don't really conversate with but enjoy nonetheless for the truth they bring to the boards: Etoile, Singularity, Aeroil, ownedsubgal, ADR, Writer Dom, Francisco, anelize. I am sure there are more but for the life of me, I can not remember names....

Luna

*nother addition: canadiancutie...she gives me grins...even when I am not looking for em....

 

[canadiancutie]

I was only mentioned once *cries*

maybe you would get mentioned more if you were a nice person... Oh well, positive vibes to you, you'll need them

 

[O'Mac]

I was only mentioned once *cries*

I would have mentioned you.....but I kinda forgot.

Sorry. You're posts are usually quite interesting as well. It's just my bad memory and no negativity towards you.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

Let's see - a few of the "newer" folks here (at least to me... that may mean they've been here a while but I didn't notice them til recently, lol). Since I don't know them as well, comments may be a little shallow.

Aeroil - pretty sharp mind and some interesting points of view for such a youngster, and gives me a little hope for the future of BDSM. (Even if he does confuse the hell out of me sometimes w/ that comic book stuff.)

canadiancutie - very sharp tongue, sometimes hard to tell when you're kidding/teasing, but I tend to think you kid more than you flay... I hope. Another of the young folks that gives me hope for BDSM - and even the world. (Even if you are vegan/vegetarian.

chris9 - laughs at my bad jokes. Another of the bright young'uns. There is hope.

killishandra - learned quickly that there is a mind behind that eye candy exterior, and learned lately that there is a good heart there, as well as a very gracious human being. If you were a few thousand miles closer, you'd make a great daughter (if I'd ever had one).

serijules - some very interesting points of view, and articulate in expressing them.

tealsphynx and dragon - young (to me, at least) couple with some interesting viewpoints and a sense of humor. Not always my sense of humor, but still often amusing.

Xelebes - Like Aerhead... I mean, Aeroil... a sharp mind and quick wit, and often presents things in a way I wouldn't normally come up with myself. (Is that saying he has a skewed POV? Well, he does. They both do. Hell, *most* of us do!)

That's all for now. Bedtime for the grumpy ol' fart.

 

[Killishandra]

*gives grumpy his bedtime kiss* night-night Sir W.

 

[canadiancutie]

Let's see - a few of the "newer" folks here (at least to me... that may mean they've been here a while but I didn't notice them til recently, lol). Since I don't know them as well, comments may be a little shallow.

Aeroil - pretty sharp mind and some interesting points of view for such a youngster, and gives me a little hope for the future of BDSM. (Even if he does confuse the hell out of me sometimes w/ that comic book stuff.)

canadiancutie - very sharp tongue, sometimes hard to tell when you're kidding/teasing, but I tend to think you kid more than you flay... I hope. Another of the young folks that gives me hope for BDSM - and even the world. (Even if you are vegan/vegetarian.

chris9 - laughs at my bad jokes. Another of the bright young'uns. There is hope.

killishandra - learned quickly that there is a mind behind that eye candy exterior, and learned lately that there is a good heart there, as well as a very gracious human being. If you were a few thousand miles closer, you'd make a great daughter (if I'd ever had one).

serijules - some very interesting points of view, and articulate in expressing them.

tealsphynx and dragon - young (to me, at least) couple with some interesting viewpoints and a sense of humor. Not always my sense of humor, but still often amusing.

Xelebes - Like Aerhead... I mean, Aeroil... a sharp mind and quick wit, and often presents things in a way I wouldn't normally come up with myself. (Is that saying he has a skewed POV? Well, he does. They both do. Hell, *most* of us do!)

That's all for now. Bedtime for the grumpy ol' fart.

positivity to you too you seem like a cool kid

 

[Private_Label]

I was only mentioned once *cries*

*pats jasonlfon the back*

I'm sorry, I just don't know many people all that well yet.

*hugs*

 

[serijules]

serijules - some very interesting points of view, and articulate in expressing them.

Thank you You were one of the people I was going to mention in my thread but didn't know enough about you yet to really put a finger on why I like your posts so much.

I do know I perv your AV often, if that is you in it. And for a bi/lesbian type with little interest in men, me finding any guy hot is a rarity, but dang, I'd, well, um...never mind.

Some others that stand out to me but I can't really put a finger on why are Luna (well, ok, being sexy as hell is one reason...) snowy ciara, graceanne, DVS, ghosst_K&H, Killi, O'Mac, WriterDom, Rosco, Richard49, CroctDen, Desdemona, Pure, s'lara, Hectate...and many more I can't think of their names, just their AVs lol (I'm very visually oriented. I hate when people change their AVs). People that really put effort into their comments and can discuss things without getting defensive or constantly flirting are people that I really enjoy reading. I love discussion and respect those that have the ability to discuss, not just...reply.

 

[graceanne]

I was only mentioned once *cries*

Sorry. I like you, but I just don't have anything specific to say that I like about you. You're just too new. *hugs*

 

[jasonlf]

I like you

I like me too.


Er, I mean, you... I like you too!

 

[graceanne]

I like me too.


Er, I mean, you... I like you too!

Well, you should. *scowls* Didn't you read what everyone said? I'm sweet! So there. lol

 

[Sir Quam]

I read through the sequence of posts out of curiosity since this was revived a week or so ago, and I would like to offer a different perspective.

There have been about 15-20 people post to this, and about 12-15 have contributed positive thoughts about those who they enjoyed talking to here. And you know what? With a few outliers tossed in, most of the respondents are saying nice things about.... the other respondents.

Not especially unexpected, but think about it.

There was a survey a couple months ago about the chemistry here and why many people tend to stay away or not have much to say. While most everyone said things were pretty much OK and good, it was the people who DIDN'T respond because they weren't here that you should think about. Sort of the "Dewey Defeats Truman" result from doing an election survey among people who had telephones, when telephones were more of an upper-class luxury.

The "inner circle" focus of this forum is part of the reason for that.



And that's it exactly. Postive vibes are fine, but you should look at the larger picture, too. And moderators and high-volume posters who reinforce the "inner circle" image do everyone a disservice.


Sin.

I do expect to be chided about "if you can't stand the heat..." and about about being afraid to jump in the pool and swim, etc. for saying this, but I felt the elephant standing in the middle of the room was too big to ignore.

Thank you for this cogent and well placed observation.

I too have noticed this penomenon. As you can see, I have nearly 40 posts now and was offered no recognition in this thread at all.

Your Dewey v. Truman analogy was well taken. There are some that might say that we all have an equal ability to post whatever and whenever we want, but they aren't thinking of those Litizens without the luxury of the Internet. What of those poor Literotica fans who are forced to ask their friends with Internet access to print page after page of BDSM talk and cafe so they can follow these threads themselves? Are their opinions to be discounted merely because they are not available for us to read?!

You should all be ashamed of yourselves!

 

[chris9]

Thank you for this cogent and well placed observation.

I too have noticed this penomenon. As you can see, I have nearly 40 posts now and was offered no recognition in this thread at all.

Your Dewey v. Truman analogy was well taken. There are some that might say that we all have an equal ability to post whatever and whenever we want, but they aren't thinking of those Litizens without the luxury of the Internet. What of those poor Literotica fans who are forced to ask their friends with Internet access to print page after page of BDSM talk and cafe so they can follow these threads themselves? Are their opinions to be discounted merely because they are not available for us to read?!

You should all be ashamed of yourselves!

You're back! I did start thinking you had left us because we were so rude... But you truely are a wonderful master you (hopefully) would never deny us you're wise words of reproach.

Sorry, people, I couldn't help feeding it, it's so much fun to have around...

 

[Sir Quam]

You're back! I did start thinking you had left us because we were so rude... But you truely are a wonderful master you (hopefully) would never deny us you're wise words of reproach.

Sorry, people, I couldn't help feeding it, it's so much fun to have around...

May I ask your gender please?

 

[graceanne]

May I ask your gender please?

She's a girl. And as for not being mentioned, I shouldn't have to. I've been very vocal of my enjoyment of your posts. Are you gonna get me laughing again tonight?

Beyond that, woo-hoo, you have 40 posts. You and most lurkers around here.

 

[chris9]

May I ask your gender please?

May I ask why you want to know?

 

[sincerely_helene]

Thanks, jasonlf. It was very sweet of you to include me into the mix even though I don't post in this section much; you're a wonderful person yourself.

 

[graceanne]

May I ask why you want to know?

Cause if you're a woman then he can do that little condesending thing he does. You know "I am man, and therefor dom, and if you were mine . . . ' like he did to CC. (I hope he does, it's hilarious.)

 

[chris9]

Cause if you're a woman then he can do that little condesending thing he does. You know "I am man, and therefor dom, and if you were mine . . . ' like he did to CC. (I hope he does, it's hilarious.)

Yes, hopefully...
Man, I would laugh so hard!

 

[Aeroil]

Thank you for this cogent and well placed observation.

I too have noticed this penomenon. As you can see, I have nearly 40 posts now and was offered no recognition in this thread at all.

Your Dewey v. Truman analogy was well taken. There are some that might say that we all have an equal ability to post whatever and whenever we want, but they aren't thinking of those Litizens without the luxury of the Internet. What of those poor Literotica fans who are forced to ask their friends with Internet access to print page after page of BDSM talk and cafe so they can follow these threads themselves? Are their opinions to be discounted merely because they are not available for us to read?!

You should all be ashamed of yourselves!

I believe Marquis mentioned you.

 

[Marquis]

Thanks, jasonlf. It was very sweet of you to include me into the mix; you're a wonderful person yourself.

I can't believe I forgot you!

Sincerely Helene: Awesome knockers. Great for cyber, a little too easy though. Being serious, she has a lot of class and style. A keen wit and a mastery of the language that I always appreciate, and isn't afraid to say some really weird shit, although I suspect there's a lot more really weird shit she doesn't say.


SirWinston54: Cool guy. Confidently dominant without having to whip his dick and a ruler out every ten minutes. Quite knowledgable, and my sense is that he is trustworthy and respectable without being a square.

DVS: Very witty, great sense of humor. Interesting writing style. His obsession with anal makes me seem almost normal, which is pretty great because I used to feel really guilty about wanting to fuck girls in the butt so bad.

JasonLF: Mild mannered, even tempered, always positive. I know there is a tiny voice inside of you that tells you that you are doing the right thing, and that others who are crazy and all over the place deep down wish they could be more like you. Believe that voice.

LunaWolf: Sexy as hell. Very friendly, and keeps it real. Did I mention she's sexy?

 

[jasonlf]

Thanks, jasonlf. It was very sweet of you to include me into the mix even though I don't post in this section much; you're a wonderful person yourself.

Now that I've got you fooled into thinking I'm a friend.... TIME FOR TEH SECKS!!!!

(hehe, reference to another thread, move along)