PM asshattery

[HellBenttoo]

Yesterday I received a pm from a gentleman. His message merely said "is your wife hairy?" I was quite excited since I receive very few pm's, so I responded quickly and succinctly , "Is your cunt wet?" Sadly the rude bastard never responded.

 

[vanillyicecream]

A couple of months ago I was threatened to be "called out" by some illiterate dweeb because I basically...called him an illiterate dweeb. Never happened, and if does...oh well...

Some of the most moronic PMs, and he sent the same one like four times over a span of several months.

Here was his final diatribe:

Are you for real! I can see why your no longer married, I'll make ya a deal I'll call you out on here in a blink of an eye, I came on here to chat and find out what your about you went off the Handel. I am guessing your some 14 year old pimple face kid that should be doing homework. I read through your posts and your calling people out on the threads, it's my turn to do the same, I'll call you out so others know what your like, I came asking you how things are going basicly and what your doing and you come back with this cunty attatude!
Shut your pie hole and loose my messages!

I laughed for hours. I can play keyboards, and I suppose at times I flew off the Handel. And basicly, I guess I really do have a cunty attatude. But I did take his advice and did loose some of his messages, but saved this gem.

 

[WhipLuvr]

Here's a few of mine....

ghhg
________________________________________
i brandish the whip

That's literally all he wrote

i want to punish you for being a whip lover.
Put an ice cube into that horny pussy and spank your nipples, puss 50 times .Now take a photo for me with your legs soared open wide.
Slut, do it now.

Oh HELL no!


This next one's just random babble, as my side os lost to the Web. But see if you can't find a common thread.....

If u are real get back asap!
Lets see what u look like
So u are fake? You can see me, so what are you hiding cunt?
Where are u located?
This would be the best situation for you
So what do you wanna do? Just play games? I thought you want to meet a real dom?
I was gonna introduce you to a dom, i know..so u didnt ahve to waste time with losers on here cunt
I know there are a lotof fakes on here, and i know you need a real master like i have, somwonw who could train you the right way.. But what i dont like is games

 

[Teresa12]

Why oh why!

Seriously, why?

"Hello Teresa, how are you?

Would you like to chat while I stroke with my sisters panties?"

I'm now going to get into a very hot shower and scrub until I don't remember this any more

 

[Saucyminx]

Seriously, why?

"Hello Teresa, how are you?

Would you like to chat while I stroke with my sisters panties?"

I'm now going to get into a very hot shower and scrub until I don't remember this any more

Imagine how his poor sister must feel.

 

[DesEsseintes]

I miss the days when I used to get dirty PMs from men - before I was using a selfie as an AV I was included on a lot of the round robin type porn spam, since to the illiterate and ill-read my username might be female. I used to enjoy feeling superior to the sort of mouth-breathers that would do that.

Now I just get gorgeously written, thoughtful PMs from beautiful women.

Sucks to be me, I guess.

 

[bailadora]

<snip> since to the illiterate and ill-read my username might be female.

*hangs head in shame*

I wasn't aware there is a literary connection with your username. I had to google it.

 

[Emerson40]

*hangs head in shame*

I wasn't aware there is a literary connection with your username. I had to google it.

Now, now. I'm certain this is something easily remedied by a few redemptive, gorgeously written PMs to DesEsseintes.

Say something beautifully filthy in French, all will be forgiven.

 

[DesEsseintes]

*hangs head in shame*

I wasn't aware there is a literary connection with your username. I had to google it.

My dear bailadora, of course I did not include you in my criticism. Unless by some chance you have an alt called bgck4U or similar? It is a fairly obscure book: the real pain was the assumption that I was remotely interested in them or their squalid, suburban fantasies.

 

[DesEsseintes]

Now, now. I'm certain this is something easily remedied by a few redemptive, gorgeously written PMs to DesEsseintes.

Say something beautifully filthy in French, all will be forgiven.

Ne'er a truer word spoken, sir!

 

[Aphro]

I miss the days when I used to get dirty PMs from men - before I was using a selfie as an AV I was included on a lot of the round robin type porn spam, since to the illiterate and ill-read my username might be female. I used to enjoy feeling superior to the sort of mouth-breathers that would do that.

Now I just get gorgeously written, thoughtful PMs from beautiful women.

Sucks to be me, I guess.

You poor dear. life is so tough.

 

[bailadora]

Now, now. I'm certain this is something easily remedied by a few redemptive, gorgeously written PMs to DesEsseintes.

Say something beautifully filthy in French, all will be forgiven.

Unless ballet terms rock his world, I'm afraid Des is out of luck. I'm not sure how one would make ronde jambe, glissade, or pas de chat sound even remotely filthy.

My dear bailadora, of course I did not include you in my criticism. Unless by some chance you have an alt called bgck4U or similar? It is a fairly obscure book: the real pain was the assumption that I was remotely interested in them or their squalid, suburban fantasies.

No alt. I don't think. I'm afraid I'm not talented enough for that, as it's enough for me to keep track of what I've written under this name!

 

[unregistered]

 

[bailadora]

^^ *snorts*

Unless I did one in my sleep? Is there such a thing as sleep-posting?

 

[unregistered]

 

[midwestyankee]

^^ *snorts*

Unless I did one in my sleep? Is there such a thing as sleep-posting?

Are you sure you want to know, you slacker?

 

[Emerson40]

Unless ballet terms rock his world, I'm afraid Des is out of luck. I'm not sure how one would make ronde jambe, glissade, or pas de chat sound even remotely filthy.

Oh, I don't know... Perhaps if you said them on Skype, dressed only in ballet slippers, on a bed covered in ribbons of implications and promise.

Yeppers.

I reckon anything even remotely French sounding would do the trick then.

 

[xtinelauren1]

I was just reading through/deleting some of my pms and remembered this gem. Basically this guy messaged me MULTIPLE times never getting a response from me. Finally I told him to leave me alone which brought this on. I added italics to make it more dramatic:

"Now what did I do you you, that made me deserve to be addressed in the rude, rude manner that you just did? Why in the world would you fuck your Karma up by doing that? I wasn't rudely you, and never spoke to you before.

D you believe in Karma? If not, this is how it works.: unless you apologize, the next bad thing that happens to you, whether large or small, will be a direct result of your negative note to me, unless of course... you apologize. If you don't, not only will Bring bad energy/karma towards you, but I will also feel very comfortable express what you've done on every thread and blog of yours. See, I have nothing to hide. And if you do, eventually, my friends on 4chan will find out who you are. Think I'm lying? Go on, say something rude again.

Think hard, before you let the bitch out again.

I'd apologize if I were you. Of course... I'm not you.

Good luck... "

Then he went on to tell me what I'm missing out on and not to message him again unless it's to apologize (because I should be nice to creeps obv.) and told me my blogs suck lol. He needs to stay on reddit with all that karma bullshit he's talking about.

 

[bailadora]

(We're you the one sending Des the PMs?)

(Maaaayybeee)

Are you sure you want to know, you slacker?

I dunno. Do all the cool kids have one? I wanna be a cool kid.

Oh, I don't know... Perhaps if you said them on Skype, dressed only in ballet slippers, on a bed covered in ribbons of implications and promise.

Oh honey, Des'd need a ton of brain bleach and ain't nobody got time for that!

Yeppers.

I reckon anything even remotely French sounding would do the trick then.

I know you're talking about French, but somehow that made me think of this:

Gru: [to Miss Hattie] You are a beautiful woman. Do you speak Spanish?
Miss Hattie: Do I look like I speak Spanish?
Gru: You have a face... Como un burro.
Miss Hattie: Oh! Well, thank you!

Lauren, I don't know why, but the level of fuckwittery on this site continues to astonish me.

 

[Eilan]

No alt, homeboy?

HA!!

 

[Eilan]

This didn't happen on Lit, nor did it happen on the site on which I encountered my FB friend:

Yesterday
Asshat: wow your hot

Today
Asshat: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I want to taste you all of you

Me: Wow, that's really creepy.

Asshat: not ment to be but you look sweet as hell

Asshat: what are you looking for

Me: *blocked*

Wasn't in the mood to engage.

 

[fire_breeze]

This didn't happen on Lit, not did it happen on the site on which I encountered my FB friend:

Yesterday
Asshat: wow your hot

Today
Asshat: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I want to taste you all of you

Me: Wow, that's really creepy.

Asshat: not ment to be but you look sweet as hell

Asshat: what are you looking for

Me: *blocked*

Wasn't in the mood to engage.

The grammar and spelling alone is revolting. Coupled with the content, I'm surprised you didn't vomit

 

[Eilan]

This wasn't on Lit. I understand that there are lots of fake female profiles on Internet dating sites, but accusing people of being fake in the first message probably isn't the best approach to successful online dating.

Asshat: How close is relatively close? Or is this just fake?

Me: FYI: calling someone a fake is a good way not to get a positive response. Did it ever occur to you that I have reasons for wanting to protect my privacy? You. Are. Dismissed.

 

[Blase]

Asshat: How close is relatively close? Or is this just fake?

Me: FYI: calling someone a fake is a good way not to get a positive response. Did it ever occur to you that I have reasons for wanting to protect my privacy? You. Are. Dismissed.

Let me get this straight... You messaged him and said you were "relatively close", and he all but accused you of being fake?

Pros don't do that: They just have autoresponders that direct you to their websites.

Let's hope that Mr Smooth really isn't as dumb as he sounds...

 

[Eilan]

Let me get this straight... You messaged him and said you were "relatively close", and he all but accused you of being fake?

Pros don't do that: They just have autoresponders that direct you to their websites.

Let's hope that Mr Smooth really isn't as dumb as he sounds...

No, he messaged me. I don't reach out to people. He was responding to something in my profile.