Petty Pet Peeves

[liliput1]

Those small continuity breaks and physics-defying acrobatics in otherwise brilliant writing that leave you muttering a bit.

I will offer two:

I know my neck is a little stiffer than most people's, but french kissing your partner in the middle of hands-on-hips doggy style? Have I seen that on pornhub? Yes. Was the bottom an ex gymnast or yoga expert? Also yes. Every single time.

The author chooses a Big/little pairing and forgets partway through that one partner is over a foot taller than the other and therefore in a 69 some things will be out of reach. Unless it's really, really long. Which they haven't mentioned so far.

Given the title, please feel free to go downhill from here. Those are just the two I thought of and today I am in the mood for alliteration.

 

[Kelliezgirl]

Good point on big/little. The current fascination with 6ft plus tall men escapes me. Having dated someone more than a foot taller than me it can create some very odd dynamics when you make the beast with two backs.

 

[anthrodisiac]

Good point on big/little. The current fascination with 6ft plus tall men escapes me. Having dated someone more than a foot taller than me it can create some very odd dynamics when you make the beast with two backs.

I'm currently writing a story where the height difference is a foot-and-a-half. But damn, that utahraptor going to town on lil' ol' me...

I'mma be sore in the morning, but worth it.

 

[dirk2024]

I know my neck is a little stiffer than most people's, but french kissing your partner in the middle of hands-on-hips doggy style? Have I seen that on pornhub? Yes. Was the bottom an ex gymnast or yoga expert? Also yes. Every single time.

Agreed. It pulls me out of the story when the author loses track of the various appendages, where they've been and where its possible - and impossible - to go.

 

[OralAllOver]

We should swell with empathy for the writers of Octopus Erotica

 

[EmilyMiller]

Those small continuity breaks and physics-defying acrobatics in otherwise brilliant writing that leave you muttering a bit.

Apparently calling these out is a major part of my beta-reading

 

[anthrodisiac]

We should swell with empathy for the writers of Octopus Erotica

I have a cuttlefish coming up, I'll be sure to pay extra attention.

 

[dirk2024]

I have a cuttlefish coming up, I'll be sure to pay extra attention.

A cuttlefish? Sounds like a sex toy.

 

[anthrodisiac]

A cuttlefish? Sounds like a sex toy.

Tentacles, alls I'm sayin'.

That's not true, I'm also saying they're really nifty and cute

 

[Kelliezgirl]

Agreed. It pulls me out of the story when the author loses track of the various appendages, where they've been and where its possible - and impossible - to go.

If you haven't maneuvered your partner into a particular position because you are double checking how things fit, are you really a serious Lit author?

 

[liliput1]

Agreed. It pulls me out of the story when the author loses track of the various appendages, where they've been and where its possible - and impossible - to go.

I made a joke the other day about knees being a huge problem during threesomes that fell about as flat as week old soda. But it’s kinda true. There’s a gimmick mattress out there that has a slot for the extra arm so people can cuddle.

 

[liliput1]

If you haven't maneuvered your partner into a particular position because you are double checking how things fit, are you really a serious Lit author?

“Are we going to fuck or what?”

“Research”

“What?”

“Two minutes, okay?”

 

[liliput1]

We should swell with empathy for the writers of Octopus Erotica

stupid sexy tentacles

 

[EmilyMiller]

We should swell with empathy for the writers of Octopus Erotica

Someone say my name?

 

[NuclearFairy]

We should swell with empathy for the writers of Octopus Erotica

I could quote a part of one of my stories here, but eh, lazy.

 

[anthrodisiac]

I could quote a part of one of my stories here, but eh, lazy.

*Nuc frantically looking over all her tentacle stories* "Which one do I even mention????"

 

[anthrodisiac]

I made a joke the other day about knees being a huge problem during threesomes that fell about as flat as week old soda.

It's why lamia are so great at threesomes.

 

[dirk2024]

*Nuc frantically looking over all her tentacle stories* "Which one do I even mention????"

The one about the houseparty.

 

[liliput1]

Someone say my name?

you hush.

 

[SmilingLez]

Tentacles, alls I'm sayin'.

Hopefully there are some suction cups in assorted sizes attached

 

[EmilyMiller]

you hush.

 

[anthrodisiac]

Hopefully there are some suction cups in assorted sizes attached

No comment.

 

[NuclearFairy]

*Nuc frantically looking over all her tentacle stories* "Which one do I even mention????"

What he said.

The one about the houseparty.

Yeah, the bit where she discovers he has tentacles is what I was thinking of. But, too lazy to go digging it up.

 

[liliput1]

Good point on big/little. The current fascination with 6ft plus tall men escapes me. Having dated someone more than a foot taller than me it can create some very odd dynamics when you make the beast with two backs.

My first was so short and I thought I was an exceptionally clever boy for figuring out that making out on stairs saved my neck. Probably hers too.

You can do the grab the shirt, tippy toes head back for a brief time but you’re not making out that way. Gotta sit down, lay down, or stairs. love me some stairs.

 

[dirk2024]

What he said.



Yeah, the bit where she discovers he has tentacles is what I was thinking of. But, too lazy to go digging it up.

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-party-225

he asked me a question, "Do you like tentacle porn?"

"Yes..." I groaned out huskily as I tried to wiggle the small of my back into his crotch.

"What's your favorite part?" He continued his whispering queries, "Is it the unwillingness or the tentacles?"

"Oh god yes both," I blurted out before nervously fisting his shirt into my hands and further explaining, "But it's mostly the organic bondage and the multiple penetration with one partner."

He let out a soft pleased rumble as he kissed along my ear and neck. After a moment he spoke up once more, "We don't know each other well enough to play with cnc just yet," then his fingers slipped up my short sleeve to rub my bare shoulder as he spoke the next part, "But I can certainly do the rest for you."

I moaned in anticipation as I pressed my whole body back into him. Then I stilled as realization hit me, he's too tall to comfortably wrap his arms that low on my waist, it feels like two limbs, and he has a hand on my shoulder. My breath quickened excitedly as I looked down to see two shiny black boneless limbs wrapped around my waist. As I gazed down the tentacles slowly loosened their hold so I quickly grabbed ahold of them as I rapidly spoke, "My room is the last door on the right!" Then I spun around and saw where the tentacles were poking out from the bottom of his t-shirt. I briefly ran my hands up their exposed length before eagerly tugging up his shirt.

Giving me a lusty look he quickly took over and yanked his shirt off. Allowing me a brief look at his four other tentacles coming into the fray before the six were pulling me up so he could thread his fingers into my hair as he took my lips in a soul searing kiss.