Opening lines

[StryWrter7]

No offense taken

Umm... no offense, but that's kind of creepy.
asenath
Really Experienced


^^^
I do agree with the group that the best way is to be yourself. Opening lines can be looked at as just a line.

Then again, first impression is usually one that sticks for awhile. A witty person seems to have a lot of great things to say, and someone who is shy - may not get up the nerve to say them.

It is funny. I don't ever remember giving the little card to my wife when I met her (20 years ago) - I was just myself.

I thought it was humorous, and perhaps a few women may have said something about the little card later on -- most of them remarked how clever it was to disguise the words in a poem. It was NOT written to pick up women. It was sent in a valentine card after I had dated a while.
I shared it with the group here, because I always seemed to get the right response from a woman. She didn't go to bed with me - but she did think it was original and funny. It broke the ice, and I didn't want to appear shy and insecure.
I guess it didn't hurt to be looked at as cute or clever verses awkward or shy.

Most of all -- whoever uses a line - or just introduces themselves .. they need to be comfortable in doing it - and it needs to be appropriate for the time and place.

 

[Hairgrip]

maybe nothing so complicated?

i always think that a pick up line is just too blatent, and it can suggest a tendency to use a line too often. so i think i would recomend saying something that compliments her, maybe you think her hair is beautiful and incredibly long... so 'excuse me i'm curious, how long have you been growing your hair for? it really shows your neck off well' or something. make a comment about where you are, what you are doing, about something you seem to both have an interest in...
i hate it when people try and pick me up in bars with corney lines, unless they say it in a really funky way. if you're shy then making an 'innane' comment about where you are or whatever (kinda along the lines of the classic 'i carried a water melon' in dirty dancing) is better than saying nothing at all and regreting it.
get to know them then move in for the kill, if that is what you want.
if you want an easy lay then i'd recomend your local meat market and a condom, your inside sleave filled with corney, blatent one liners...
pob luc
hope all goes well.
and DON'T try too hard!
Hx

 

[SonTzu]

I am being myself.
*tumble weeb rolls by*

 

[sirhugs]

Ahh.. such a dilema for shy people. More so when both parties are shy.

More often than not the opposite sex likes for potential partners to be bold and confident. I know I do.. but I am also very charmed by shy introverts. I have a very "loud" personality.. and can't ever imagine waiting around for someone to make a move. If I have even the slightest inclination that someone is interested, I will act upon it. Do I get rejected?? Well, I am a girl.. so the odds are low of that happening.. Personally I feel that if you can't be yourself and approach someone, then why bother? If they are a bitch and say something like.. "as if I care".. then you wouldn't want to go out with them anyway.

Have things changed for you Sir??

alas, I got married, thus destroying all chance for sex until I learn a more polite way to ask " do you date married men?"

 

[sirhugs]

I am being myself.
*tumble weeb rolls by*

you need to learn to project your best self. The "you" that got an "A"; hit a homerun; had the shiniest car in the lot.....whatever made you glow- its the confidence of the glow that we recreate behind a "line"- which is, after all, just a form of theatre. What the " be yourself" school misses is that all mating/dating is largely ritualized ( it helps to study anthropology). Women don't want the "real" you, they want you to match an idealized set of subconscious culturally dictated pstandards. "Lines" are just a part of the waltz- like bowing in the old French Court- showing you know the rules, therefore sare "in".

 

[lovetoread]

alas, I got married, thus destroying all chance for sex until I learn a more polite way to ask " do you date married men?"

That was funny.

 

[sirhugs]

yes, well, laughter keeps me sane (sort of).

it is also true, in my case. My wife is the sort who once she has a man, needs another. She's had me, so.....

 

[Manhunter]

Oops I posted here already

 

[RomanHans]

Oops I posted here already

(Manhunter clearly trying to get to post 100 by any means necessary...)

Not that I've had any success in picking up women spontaneously, but I imagine that a lot of it depends on approaching a woman who's in the mood to be 'picked up.' That's where I have the most trouble--I realize that the game has low percentages, and I'm not very good at withstanding serial rejection.

 

[tonyzee23]

Seriously... what kind of opening lines would you say to get a girls attention.

I always liked "nice shoes, wanna fuck" right to the point.. lol
never worked though, but when it does, woohoo

try, hi my name is.. what's yours and work on small talk...

 

[Guest]

hmmm

This is always a fascinating question. Frankly, if she thinks you are cute and is interested in being chatted up at the bar, supermarket, etc. and isn't attached (let's be honest. most are) then as long as you don't come off like a moron you may have a shot. I think this be yourself business is something women honestly believe is true. But my feeling is if we were truely ourselves around women, especially initially, then they wouldn't even stop to say goodbye. They want the best version of yourself. Confident, exciting, funny, thrilling. I think the line is irrelevant. It's the conversation afterwards. That was I hate. It's like some form of small talk (which is excrucaiting in any form) that still has to be witty, smart and fun. I know like 2 guys who can do that. If you could actually talk to a girl about real things and get past the resume of crap that passes for conversation then two people could make a connection. Doing this initially seems too forward and women are (rightfully so) guarded initially so I think many miss out because they are reluctant to have a real conversation (and sadly depending on the bimbo, incapable). That's why I met some wonderful (and gorgeous) women on the net. You get past the awkward stage and talk about each other. Plus she doesn't notice you staring at her breasts the whole time. The truth is guys, if she digs you she will let you know one way or the other. It's worth a shot always. ALWAYS. But be prepared for it not to happen. Get over the rejection. If more women had capricious's attitude then everyone would be more happy. But really, most expect you to do the work. It's not mean. If you could wait for hot girls to come up to you, wouldn't YOU?

 

[timmaah]

SIRC Guide to Flirting

Got about 20 minutes to kill, ths is an interesting read...

SIRC Guide to Flirting
http://www.sirc.org/publik/flirt.html

According to them, the opening line doesn't matter that much...

>>
When you first meet new people, their initial impression of you will be based 55% on your appearance and body-language, 38% on your style of speaking and only 7% on what you actually say.
<<

Tim

 

[SonTzu]

Then this thread is useless

 

[n43hs]

Well I don't know much about lines the I picked up the now almost ex ( counting in days now ) with " have a seat " ( this was on the back of my flatbed 1 ton ) country girls really are more fun sometimes even if they do break your heart

Thats about the only line I can remember ever using I got asked last week by someone when if I was there to pick her up for a date ( knew her for a few weeks and it was at her work I thought she was kidding until her coworker said something to me about it ps she was way out of my league totally hot but she also was just not my type too girly and immature but what an ego boost it felt great for a while )

Other than that be honest and remember don't judge anyone until you know them sometimes the most remarkable people I have met I initally thought were strange or weird but then I took a look in the mirror.

 

[phatcat]

it baffles me

when girls beat the cliche to death about "being yourself"... if you're shy, then being yourself will get you nowhere. If you tend to talk refrences all the time, and kill your friends with hilarious jokes about subjects they are familiar with, this won't work on a total stranger: she'll be going "wha?" So being yourself isn't the best advice.

I find the best advice is to assume that the person you want to ask is interested in you and they are just looking for an excuse to get to know you. You job, then is quite simple: give them an excuse. The killer after any opening line is getting self-concious or thinking about yourself. The moment that happens, stop, and think about the person you are talking to - look at them - pick out anything that jumps out at you (don't get obscene obviously) and continue the conversation. Ask questions if you get stuck. Point out ironies. Remember, if they are looking for the excuse (and we have decided they are then even stupid jokes will prevail (don't over do it though). Don't rush. Smile. If you are in the supermarket or in a store, you have tons of props to work with.

And with that, go get 'em.

 

[horny_giraffe]

Re: it baffles me

For my opening, I sometimes make up some pretense to talk to someone I wish to meet (and talk to.) I try to observe them and ask them about stuff. Like, do they like the music (that's playing) or what they are reading and what other things do they like to read or even ask for directions or the time of day. If they won't give me the time of day, well...I guess that's kind of a lost cause, then--isn't it?

Most people, if they're in the mood to talk all they need is an easy opening, anyway--just some simple excuse. If they don't want to talk to me, all I can do is shrug and move on. Plenty more where they came from.

 

[Guest]

begging question?

Begs the question, because, if you say " hi", you still need a follwup, after she say " hi, I'm bridget..."

SirHugs-
You got me there... except, it gives you a chance to measure my response... did I smile when I responded? did I make positive eye contact? It gives both parties a chance to withdraw gracefully if they want to...

Unless a guy is really offensive... using the words "fuck" or "ass" in the first line would definitely qualify... I always tried to put a guy at ease... just being polite..( alas, I am very married now and usually respond now by flashing my large diamond and bringing up my kids, trying to communicate that I am friendly, but not available).. following up with a general topic of conversation... "What do you do for a living?" or something relevant to the setting, "Why are you at this conference?", usually worked with me to get the ball rolling.

Like attracts like, usually, so if you are looking for a quick roll then use the edgier lines.. it will quickly sort through the "candidates"..

If you are looking to having more, start out as you want to go on be interested in her and she will be interested in you.

-b

 

[sirhugs]

"be interested in her and she will be interested in you. "

I agree, even if only looking to live the next few hours as if they are our last. I disagreed ( cringed?) when another poster said " talk about yourself" . I think that's deadly. Do you agree?

A lot of it of coourse, can be situational, as you alluded top in your conference example:

bar " what are you drinking?"
art gallery " do you like this painting?"
park " nice dog"
grocery " can you help me pick a ripe cantelope" ( ok, that's a bit risky)
bookstore/library " can you recommend a good book on..."
music store " what type of music do you like?"

 

[capricious_chic]

SirHugs...

Do you have an open marriage then??

 

[SkyBluAngelEyes]

"Hi, how are you?" or "Can I buy you a cup of coffee?" works best on me... I don't go for the awful pickup lines. i

 

[HoldenMcCrank]

Hello

My name is Holden McCrank. Would you like to be Mrs Holden McCrank! LOL

I couldn't resist!

 

[sirhugs]

SirHugs...

Do you have an open marriage then??

I prefer to think of it as an honest marriage. We have forsaken possessiveness, but I hesitate to call it open as long as my life remains entirely theoretical.

 

[capricious_chic]

I prefer to think of it as an honest marriage. We have forsaken possessiveness, but I hesitate to call it open as long as my life remains entirely theoretical.

Many well wishes. I don't think I could ever forsake possessiveness, as I have a very possessive nature. I might.. uhm.. share or be shared, but I couldn't even imagine not having a choice in it.

 

[RomanHans]

Re: SIRC Guide to Flirting

Got about 20 minutes to kill, ths is an interesting read...

SIRC Guide to Flirting
http://www.sirc.org/publik/flirt.html

According to them, the opening line doesn't matter that much...

>>
When you first meet new people, their initial impression of you will be based 55% on your appearance and body-language, 38% on your style of speaking and only 7% on what you actually say.
<<

Tim

If you want a somewhat twisted and less academic view of the topic, check out the folks who used to post on the USENET group alt.seduction.fast...I think they migrated to a new site at http://www.fastseduction.com. A bunch of self-described 'players' who use psycho-babble and other techniques to 'bag' women in bars and other settings.

Definite a group worth checking out as a subject of fascination, disgust, or all of the above.

Roman

 

[lovetoread]

Re: Hello

My name is Holden McCrank. Would you like to be Mrs Holden McCrank! LOL

I couldn't resist!

Do we know each other well enough?

Heh...