One partner only

[qbert12345]

Have any of you out there only been with one person in your life and are married to that person? If so, have you ever wondered what it would be like to be with someone else? I fall into this boat and I always wonder what it would be like (although I know I never will.)

 

[SweetErika]

Just to clarify, you wonder what it would be like to have other partners besides your wife, because you're married and she's the only woman you've been with?

I'm not qualified to answer because I had experience before, and since we've been married. However, I will say I'm really thankful for that experience because it helped shape my sexuality and I haven't had too many thoughts of, 'What's out there? What might I be missing?' I suppose that's not really helpful to you though.

I'm sure some who are in your situation will come along shortly.

 

[Quoll]

First and only person I made love to was and still is my wife.
Have I ever thought about being with someone else? Sure.
If you mean sexually, I'm pretty sure just about everyone has thoughts or fantasies about being with someone else. In my case I could never cheat on my wife so it would have to be with her consent and even then I couldn't do it because it would mean she would be left out. I'll just stick with my fantasy of me my wife and her best friend. (It'll never happen but they both have fun teasing me about it anyway)
I don't see any harm in having these sorts of fantasies, particularly if you have no intention of fulfilling them.

 

[Bandit58]

I was married to my first sexual partner for nearly 24 years, from age 19 until 43. I missed out on a lot, including actually being loved I'm 47 now and I'm in a great relationship with a lovely guy

I admit that I thought about being with other people, but never acted on it until 3 months after I separated from my husband. I was with 3 men before I met Gil, and he is all I've ever wanted. I'm exploring my bisexuality now too which is something I kept way hidden for a very long time

 

[KarenDee]

I'm similar to Bandit. I got married at age 16 and then divorced at age 32. I'm now 35 and until just recently, my husband was the only man I ever had sex with. I don't think it's a case of "missing anything" since I was happy at the time (well until he started cheating), and I'm happy now with my new partner. I suppose for a lot of people there always will be that "greener grass on the other side of the fence" but I've never looked at it that way. I tend to live in the moment, and never seem to fantasize about someone else. In most cases there's nothing wrong with it, though I guess it all depends how strong your relationship is to start with.

 

[bobsgirl]

Have any of you out there only been with one person in your life and are married to that person? If so, have you ever wondered what it would be like to be with someone else? I fall into this boat and I always wonder what it would be like (although I know I never will.)

My husband and I were the firsts for each other. We've been married for 28 years. I've always wondered what being with someone else would be like. And I guess I do fantasize about it. But it would be trading the comfort and security of a longtime lover for the rush of a new experience. Not sure sometimes which is preferable. Actually, no, that's not true. The security and acceptance are very important to me.

But I still wonder...

 

[Guest]

 

[M's girl]

I've had a few long-lasting relationships and some shorter ones (and one one-night-stand that I intended for to last longer.... at the time ). I can't say I'm not happy about the different experiences. Still... most important to me has always been that there's a balance between your sexlife and the things that you do together outside the bedroom. If you are friends in the first place, if you can talk to each other about everything, feel secure and loved in the relationship ánd if you have a decent sexlife I would say you hit the jackpot! No need to look anywhere else.

My experience is that if you compare all the sexual encounters you ever had with different people, the overall outcome will be: average. I had two sexual partners who new their business and were very exciting. The rest was about average or plain crap in bed. So don't think you will always get better if you look further.

 

[TBKahuna123]

OK this is something I've thought about a great deal. I've been with other women than my wife before we were married, but I can honestly say I've never been with anyone better. The main reason is that she is always willing to try new things, explore ad grow our sex life. Quite frankly, in my crass opinion, one pussy feels like another. It's the heart and soul attached to it that makes a lover special. If you are with a woman who satisfies your needs and you continue to grow your sex life, then you aren't missing a thing.

The grass always looks greener on the other side, but I gotta tell ya, when you get there, you often learn just how thick and plush and well groomed the lawn was back at your house.

 

[Eilan]

The grass always looks greener on the other side, but I gotta tell ya, when you get there, you often learn just how thick and plush and well groomed the lawn was back at your house.

I didn't know this was a thread about pubes.

I was a bit of a late bloomer; I lost my virginity when I was 20. Until I met my husband, my ex had been my only partner. I'd never really spent a lot of time thinking about the fact that I'd had only one partner until I decided that I ready to start dating again. I was worried that I wouldn't be "good enough."

What I've discovered in the 4+ years since I've been with my hubby is that it's not about the number of partners that you have, it's about the type/quality of experiences that you have with them. Hell, if I wanted to, I could go out right now, with my hubby's blessing, and fuck anyone I wanted, but I'm not doing that because, while it's a nice fantasy, I prefer the touch of someone familiar.

 

[TBKahuna123]

I didn't know this was a thread about pubes.

I remember a story I heard about a gal that came into an ER with a burst appendix. When they stripped her they found that in addition to her punk hair, piercings, tattoos, etc. that she had died her bush green and had a tatto that said "Keep off the Grass!" Since they had to shave her for the operation they left her a note that said, "sorry we had to mow the lawn."

Now, back on topic...

What I've discovered in the 4+ years since I've been with my hubby is that it's not about the number of partners that you have, it's about the type/quality of experiences that you have with them. Hell, if I wanted to, I could go out right now, with my hubby's blessing, and fuck anyone I wanted, but I'm not doing that because, while it's a nice fantasy, I prefer the touch of someone familiar.

That's just it, quality. All it takes, IMNSHO, to make a quality experience is someone who is willing to explore and grow sexually with you, who cares about your pleasure and who is forgiving of any faux pas you might commit along the way. You take those bumps as fun and enjoyable, not detrimental. If you have a partner like that then forget looking for someone else. Once you find someone you are comfortable opening up to sexually, you won't ever find someone better. The sex will never be as good as it is with the perons you are the most open with.

 

[KarenDee]

The sex will never be as good as it is with the perons you are the most open with.

Can we make this statement "required reading" for everyone...experienced or not? Thanks TBK for saying it so succinctly. You'll be surprised how far you and your partner can go when communication is practiced with more enthusiasm than sexual techniques!

 

[ohiobiguy]

My wife and I have only been with each other and are exploring allowing each other to have same sex relationships, so we can each fully explore that side of our respectice sexualities.