Once More Into the Breach …

[Lifestyle66]

Let’s watch the Loving Wives troll-bashing fun yet again as Don Quixote charges the windmills of the denizens of LW, trying to teach them that other people think differently.

I clicked “publish” on my latest 11K+ story of my favorite swinger couple for the “extra-marital sex” category. This will be public within the next two or three days as “What Were You Thinking?” (“Husband discovers his wife’s deception.”)


As an aside, I realized that if you want more views for you story, try looking at the category you wish to use for your story, and look at the most popular tags for that category! Tags for this LW story: cheating, wife sharing, swingers, cuckold, slut, revenge, oral sex, blowjob, wife, cheating wife.


While my original next episode for my favorite swinger couple was to be an encounter with one of their friends leaning in a different sexual direction, I just wasn’t inspired to focus on that story line. I had the story outlined with 4k words, and I may continue writing it in the future. But after some exchanges here in the forums with others ref spouse sharing, swinger “rules”, open marriages, etc, I was inspired in a different direction and decided to sacrifice my favorite dedicated married swingers, throwing them to the BTB wolves.

Let’s see if the trolls appreciate a guy who decides to remain married for the sex and path-of-least-resistance, after he finds his wife breaking his ONLY unbreakable rule.

 

[Lifestyle66]

The LW story is published: "What Were You Thinking?" So far (after just 5 hours), it has over 5k views and more than 100 ratings for an average 2.81.

Not bad!

The only comments so far are critiquing my writing style and that the characters are "Lacking in emotion and ... I really didnt see any kind of love there."

I think even these well-intentioned comments are reading the story and missing the point. I tried going to great pains to show the MC's past to build him as an emotionless character (a geek). And the main character even explains "Ours might not be the handholding, fawning, cuddling, jealously protecting love others claim to feel. But it works for us."

This story was to show a marriage in which the husband might not "love" his wife in the same highly emotional way others do, but he also can't HATE her either. So, even with her deception which he sees as "cheating", his method of BTB is merely to even the score.

 

[lc69hunter]

The LW story is published: "What Were You Thinking?" So far (after just 5 hours), it has over 5k views and more than 100 ratings for an average 2.81.

Not bad!

The only comments so far are critiquing my writing style and that the characters are "Lacking in emotion and ... I really didnt see any kind of love there."

I think even these well-intentioned comments are reading the story and missing the point. I tried going to great pains to show the MC's past to build him as an emotionless character (a geek). And the main character even explains "Ours might not be the handholding, fawning, cuddling, jealously protecting love others claim to feel. But it works for us."

This story was to show a marriage in which the husband might not "love" his wife in the same highly emotional way others do, but he also can't HATE her either. So, even with her deception which he sees as "cheating", his method of BTB is merely to even the score.

You had him handle it like a man, not like some weak little fragile imitation thereof

 

[Lifestyle66]

You had him handle it like a man, not like some weak little fragile imitation thereof

Some of the comments indicate the readers didn't know what was meant by "no double standards".

 

[Handley_Page]

??

 

[oneagainst]

Vale. Godspeed re LW.

[gladatorial fist bang against chest salute]

 

[NoTalentHack]

So I read it, and I understand where you were coming from, but I also get why people don't like it.

You wrote (and keep writing with these two characters) a great character study of two interesting but almost wholly unlikable characters. I get that the two characters "love" each other, for a certain value of "love," but it reads more like codependence and inertia than love, especially in the most recent one. There's a pattern that keeps reoccurring: MMC sets a boundary, FMC either begs to break it, threatens to withhold sex until he relents, or (in this case) breaks it and offers a bunch of self-serving bullshit up along with threats and indignation when caught out.

The guy, on the other hand, is like "well, I keep getting sex... except that she uses it to manipulate me. But as long as I go along, I keep getting sex. And I don't want to have to break in a new girlfriend/wife." Which... dude, this one isn't broken in. She's broken him in; he finally showed a spine here to a limited extent, and it was just to do something she didn't like, as if "don't fuck this one specific person" is equivalent to "don't lie to me and sneak around on me."

Never does she actually apologize. The word "sorry" only appears when she apologizes for her behavior before the weekend away. She acts a little contrite without saying the words, gives him some sex (which seems to be her go-to apology), and says she wants to rebuild trust and not have double standards. That's all.

But there are still double standards; even if he doesn't specifically say "I'mma go fuck the woman you don't like," she knows he's going to exact some (incredibly small) revenge. She has to know what's going to happen when he goes to the cabin, even if not exactly who with. She broke his only big rule (which was also hers, another one of the self-imposed rules that she's broken), and his response is... to fuck someone else. Which is something he already does.

There's no BTB here. That would imply some level of revenge. Even the MMC knows that she has more to fear from divorce than she does, as pointed out with the splitting of the accounts. IF this was a point in time in their relationship and you showed afterwards that she was both contrite and changed her behavior, that would be one thing. But this just reads like spitting into the wind by the MMC; nothing's actually going to change on her end, except that she now knows there are no boundaries she can break without major consequences.

Your writing is good, as usual. But you're writing about two broken people in a broken relationship that act shitty towards each other, one more than the other. It's frustrating and unsatisfying for the majority of readers. There's no one to root for and, arguably, two people to root against.

The closest analogy I can think of is (super nerd alert) when playing a roleplaying game like D&D and someone brings their character that's a dark brooding loner that does whatever he wants, consequences be damned, then says "but I'm just playing my character!" Which... yeah, they are. but they made the character, and the players have said "you are making things less fun for us," and he keeps doing it.

Write these stories if they're fun for you; I wholly endorse that. God knows I have enough unlikeable characters in my stories. But don't also act surprised when people rate them low. The "table" doesn't like them, and you know that, and they've told you why. And, yeah, part of it is that they're swingers, but part of it is that they're also just... really unpleasant people. Or at least that's how they're written.

 

[SimonDoom]

As an aside, I realized that if you want more views for you story, try looking at the category you wish to use for your story, and look at the most popular tags for that category! Tags for this LW story: cheating, wife sharing, swingers, cuckold, slut, revenge, oral sex, blowjob, wife, cheating wife.

This is excellent advice. I try to do this myself, and I think it works.

 

[Lifestyle66]

So I read it, and I understand where you were coming from, but I also get why people don't like it.

You wrote (and keep writing with these two characters) a great character study of two interesting but almost wholly unlikable characters. I get that the two characters "love" each other, for a certain value of "love," but it reads more like codependence and inertia than love, especially in the most recent one. There's a pattern that keeps reoccurring: MMC sets a boundary, FMC either begs to break it, threatens to withhold sex until he relents, or (in this case) breaks it and offers a bunch of self-serving bullshit up along with threats and indignation when caught out.

The guy, on the other hand, is like "well, I keep getting sex... except that she uses it to manipulate me. But as long as I go along, I keep getting sex. And I don't want to have to break in a new girlfriend/wife." Which... dude, this one isn't broken in. She's broken him in; he finally showed a spine here to a limited extent, and it was just to do something she didn't like, as if "don't fuck this one specific person" is equivalent to "don't lie to me and sneak around on me."

Never does she actually apologize. The word "sorry" only appears when she apologizes for her behavior before the weekend away. She acts a little contrite without saying the words, gives him some sex (which seems to be her go-to apology), and says she wants to rebuild trust and not have double standards. That's all.

But there are still double standards; even if he doesn't specifically say "I'mma go fuck the woman you don't like," she knows he's going to exact some (incredibly small) revenge. She has to know what's going to happen when he goes to the cabin, even if not exactly who with. She broke his only big rule (which was also hers, another one of the self-imposed rules that she's broken), and his response is... to fuck someone else. Which is something he already does.

There's no BTB here. That would imply some level of revenge. Even the MMC knows that she has more to fear from divorce than she does, as pointed out with the splitting of the accounts. IF this was a point in time in their relationship and you showed afterwards that she was both contrite and changed her behavior, that would be one thing. But this just reads like spitting into the wind by the MMC; nothing's actually going to change on her end, except that she now knows there are no boundaries she can break without major consequences.

Your writing is good, as usual. But you're writing about two broken people in a broken relationship that act shitty towards each other, one more than the other. It's frustrating and unsatisfying for the majority of readers. There's no one to root for and, arguably, two people to root against.

The closest analogy I can think of is (super nerd alert) when playing a roleplaying game like D&D and someone brings their character that's a dark brooding loner that does whatever he wants, consequences be damned, then says "but I'm just playing my character!" Which... yeah, they are. but they made the character, and the players have said "you are making things less fun for us," and he keeps doing it.

Write these stories if they're fun for you; I wholly endorse that. God knows I have enough unlikeable characters in my stories. But don't also act surprised when people rate them low. The "table" doesn't like them, and you know that, and they've told you why. And, yeah, part of it is that they're swingers, but part of it is that they're also just... really unpleasant people. Or at least that's how they're written.

Thanks for reading it and taking the time to give me your feedback.

I realized long ago that many people hate my characters. I wrote these two and built their dysfunctional personalities as a response to some other author/critics asking "why would she/he act that way?" I gave them dysfunctional personalities to explain their choice of the swinger lifestyle. And that lifestyle is a sore point with most readers in LW.

The wife's use of sex to manipulate men and never saying she's sorry is both a poke at feminists and a nod to my own wife's often use of similar tactics. I recognize that tactic in my wife, and she knows it doesn't really work on me. So, it becomes a joke between us, when I tell her "I'm only doing this (whatever she wanted) for the blowjobs." And in my experience, MOST people never really say they are sorry! They may obfuscate or say it with some condescending tone which indicates they don't really mean it or are somehow making a joke of it. And how many breakdown crying when they realize they done something wrong? To me that indicates they're looking for sympathy, and just sorry they got caught!

IMO, most married men fail to realize their wives' use of sex as a bargaining chip in their relationships. And over time, those men just become accustomed to less sex, and they grow older together with their "loving wife", claiming some higher spiritual love as the reason for remaining together. But in looking back at my own parent's long marriage and others, I realized many stayed together out of some misguided sense of obligation and knowing no other way (fear of) starting a new relationship. I realized in my parents' own comments to each other in front of us kids that there was a great deal of animosity between them. But they were the picture of a loving, dedicated couple.

So, I wrote my characters to be a caricature of a loving, dysfunctional couple for the Loving Wives "extra-marital sex" category. Their dysfunctional traits toward each other are there to set aside those deceptive traits I've seen in so many "real", loving couples. And I'm having fun providing entertainment for those dedicated readers on both of the fence there in LW.

As for the ratings, I don't complain. I've made it very clear here in the AH that the ratings mean so little to me that I'll even try seeing how low it can go.

This latest story currently (less than 36 hours since going live) has 36 favorites, 3.15 average with 729 votes and 54 comments from 34,777 views! I have touched quite a few people, with what amounts to an average story. And I'm an F-ing amateur, shitty writer! I'm learning!!!!

 

[Gamblnluck]

The LW story is published: "What Were You Thinking?" So far (after just 5 hours), it has over 5k views and more than 100 ratings for an average 2.81.

Not bad!

The only comments so far are critiquing my writing style and that the characters are "Lacking in emotion and ... I really didnt see any kind of love there."

One of the things that I like about LW is you get a massive number of reads. Yes, the readership is also more critical. When you see few react pro or con the story generally sucks. I get that same 'lack of emotional characters' comment often. A character wringing his hands, puking, pounding the walls etc does not make the story better. Mostly the emotion is in what the reader feels. Do the characters bother/anger them, amuse or are they just telling the story?

 

[lovecraft68]

There's so many factions there, and each bash the thing they don't like, is I wonder what it would take to get a good score and little trolling.

The category is supposed to be about 'adventurous wives" so the whole "I don't see loving wives here' remark I see on a lot of stories makes no sense. If you had a story of a happy loving monogamous couple then....what's the angle? It would go in romance.

 

[Gamblnluck]

The LW story is published: "What Were You Thinking?" So far (after just 5 hours), it has over 5k views and more than 100 ratings for an average 2.81.

Not bad!

The only comments so far are critiquing my writing style and that the characters are "Lacking in emotion and ... I really didnt see any kind of love there."

I wrote a reply but it disappeared. I like writing in LW. You will get more reads in a short time than almost any other category. You will also get more comments. Some of those comments will actually help as an author. Plot holes, stupid assumptions/contrivances (MC took a shotgun blast to the head and walked away with a headache) etc. are not going to pass getting called out on.
I read your story wondering why I'd ignored it. You started well and then you went to the open marriage thing or rather the sharing parties. I probably stopped right there. That just happens to one of those things I do not like.
I had a little trouble figuring what the MC was really upset about. Was it the wife did not talk to him first? Or that she took her playing out of the 'just during parties'? Yes the no double standards but that seemed to be his ONLY hard line. Not only was he unemotional, but his angst was not really defined.
And your 'revenge' tag.... There was none. The wife might be upset when she sees who he invited but not much. She'd be more concerned she'd lost her control.
Get a beta reader or a few of them. People you trust to tell you that you missed the boat and how. A few of mine tell me, 'not my cup of tea but...' Or they tell me it a certain area does not flow. It helps.

 

[Gamblnluck]

As for the ratings, I don't complain. I've made it very clear here in the AH that the ratings mean so little to me that I'll even try seeing how low it can go.

One thing about ratings is if you continually get low ratings your readership will also decline. There are so many stories to read, I generally do not even read stories with a rating below 3.5 unless the title or description intrigues me or I know the author. I figure if others hate a story, I probably will also. Unless you want to write for a relative few, try to get decent ratings. By that I do NOT mean pander to readers. Figure why your ratings are low.

 

[Lifestyle66]

One thing about ratings is if you continually get low ratings your readership will also decline. There are so many stories to read, I generally do not even read stories with a rating below 3.5 unless the title or description intrigues me or I know the author. I figure if others hate a story, I probably will also. Unless you want to write for a relative few, try to get decent ratings. By that I do NOT mean pander to readers. Figure why your ratings are low.

If you're reading just those LW stories which are rated over 4, then you will miss most stories of swingers which don't end in divorce.

My stories rate under 4 because (besides being a shitty writer), the story line has swingers having fun with extra-marital sex. There are those readers in LW who appreciate such stories and rate them a 5. But the majority of LW readers HATE any story in which a wife has fun with extra-marital sex and the husband allows it without some type of revenge.

...
I read your story wondering why I'd ignored it. You started well and then you went to the open marriage thing or rather the sharing parties. I probably stopped right there. That just happens to one of those things I do not like.
I had a little trouble figuring what the MC was really upset about. Was it the wife did not talk to him first? Or that she took her playing out of the 'just during parties'?

You didn't ignore my story. You read it and commented on July 10th. The MC said her deception and the fact she didn't own up to it when he first confronted her was the one thing he couldn't accept. She changed their trusting relationship.

Yes the no double standards but that seemed to be his ONLY hard line. Not only was he unemotional, but his angst was not really defined.
And your 'revenge' tag.... There was none. The wife might be upset when she sees who he invited but not much. She'd be more concerned she'd lost her control.

Yes, the wife is upset that she lost her control over him. She eventually explained to him that she just felt she needed to spend the weekend fucking without asking him, and that she didn't want him doing the same thing. She wanted to continue with her "same room" rule controlling her husband, and the only way to do that and to have her fun weekend was to hide it from him.

His "revenge" is to separate their bank accounts in the future, leaving her without the ability to add to HER retirement savings or she'd have to change and rein in her spending. And he also ensured she understood that she no longer had control over him.

Get a beta reader or a few of them. People you trust to tell you that you missed the boat and how. A few of mine tell me, 'not my cup of tea but...' Or they tell me it a certain area does not flow. It helps.

I've tried beta-readers with some stories in the past. They help sometimes. But other times, they want the story to go in a different direction. And if you don't like such swinger sharing stories, then your beta-reader suggestions would likely try to lead me away from writing such things.

As of today, that story "What Were You Thinking" has almost 72K views and over 1,100 votes with an average rating of 3.29. But 55 people have added it to their favorites!

I wrote a follow-on sequel to that story a month later "What Were You Thinking - Therapy" which goes into more detail of the wife's reaction when he returns from his weekend, and they discuss extra-marital sex with a therapist.

I used both of these stories to give the "monogamy-only" Burn the Bitch crowd something to think about. In the sequel, the husband explains how much he needs and appreciates his wife for their routines and why he's so unemotional.

 

[Gamblnluck]

've tried beta-readers with some stories in the past. They help sometimes. But other times, they want the story to go in a different direction. And if you don't like such swinger sharing stories, then your beta-reader suggestions would likely try to lead me away from writing such things.

The trick is to find readers who like that thing. Swinging is okay in some cases. I definitely do not like the stories where the guy sits at home while the wife plays with everybody and he then licks her out after. Big difference from a mutual play scenario. But both going out to find lovers can be risky. Personally I think it can leave to divorce because the playing is unbalanced. I'm sure you see those stories that wind up this way. The woman finds herself out virtually every night, the man stays home perhaps watching the kids if they live at home. The guy gets tired of doing all the work while the wife gets all the play. He leaves and she is shocked claiming he agreed originally. That becomes almost a mild BTB story. It all depends on the story how I react to the playing around. Is it cheating or playing?
I personally can not write one of those stories. I could not fathom letting my wife go fuck whoever, whenever. Especially, I would not fuck nor do oral sex on her after.
I am trying to hit a few different categories. Many I could not because I cannot even get my mind into how the characters should respond.
I just submitted a nonconsent story told in the third person. It started telling how the characters thought. Then I realized most of their reaction was through dialog.
I'd changed how the story was told subtly. I'll wait and see how readers comment. Many of my stories are first person, even some kinkier ones. I try to get into the mind of my MC.
If you ever want to discuss a story, email me.

 

[Lifestyle66]

The trick is to find readers who like that thing. Swinging is okay in some cases. I definitely do not like the stories where the guy sits at home while the wife plays with everybody and he then licks her out after. Big difference from a mutual play scenario. But both going out to find lovers can be risky. Personally I think it can leave to divorce because the playing is unbalanced. I'm sure you see those stories that wind up this way. The woman finds herself out virtually every night, the man stays home perhaps watching the kids if they live at home. The guy gets tired of doing all the work while the wife gets all the play. He leaves and she is shocked claiming he agreed originally. That becomes almost a mild BTB story. It all depends on the story how I react to the playing around. Is it cheating or playing?
I personally can not write one of those stories. I could not fathom letting my wife go fuck whoever, whenever. Especially, I would not fuck nor do oral sex on her after.
I am trying to hit a few different categories. Many I could not because I cannot even get my mind into how the characters should respond.
I just submitted a nonconsent story told in the third person. It started telling how the characters thought. Then I realized most of their reaction was through dialog.
I'd changed how the story was told subtly. I'll wait and see how readers comment. Many of my stories are first person, even some kinkier ones. I try to get into the mind of my MC.
If you ever want to discuss a story, email me.

I agree on the type of preferred content, sharing without the cuck/humiliation. My other stories are that way. But I finally felt compelled to try writing MY version of a BTB/cheating story with my two MCs to address the nay-sayers. Thats' why it's not really a "BURN the bitch", but a more subtle "there are some consequences" when one steps too far out of bounds. I wrote the follow-on "What Were You Thinking - Therapy" as a means of trying to patch things up between them.

And we're the same in that I don't care for the guy eating her out afterwards. If you read my story "My Wife Wants a Hall Pass", you'll see the husband finding out her old boyfriend is BI/more gay-leaning and he tells the guy "I don't lean that way." Even in the chapter when they first meet Rodger, the husband is standing by the bed watching them fuck until Rodger cums in her, then the husband hands her a box of tissue to clean herself.

I'm taking a short break from writing for a week or two to prioritize other life events. But I'll contact you when I get further along with my next one.

 

[Lifestyle66]

Okay, I did it again.

My latest in Loving Wives, A Dare at the Nude Resort, was another attempt to write a story with enough character building to answer the critics.

And of course, some critics ignore the details and throw out their comments based on their own prejudices.

One Anonymous comment said: "For me her saying that she will just lay there and you can use me any way you want is a real downer. So for her husband she is just a piece of meat. No way."

In the story, just one very short paragraph later after the husband fucked his wife, she says: "You're my only lover," Jan replied, as she looked into my eyes and wrapped her arms over my shoulders. Then she glanced over at Matt. "But you're a fantastic stunt cock," she cheerfully added."

Now in all fairness, the wife treats other men as "a piece of meat"! But that seems to be missed by the feminist commenter.

 

[NoTalentHack]

Okay, I did it again.

My latest in Loving Wives, A Dare at the Nude Resort, was another attempt to write a story with enough character building to answer the critics.

And of course, some critics ignore the details and throw out their comments based on their own prejudices.

One Anonymous comment said: "For me her saying that she will just lay there and you can use me any way you want is a real downer. So for her husband she is just a piece of meat. No way."

In the story, just one very short paragraph later after the husband fucked his wife, she says: "You're my only lover," Jan replied, as she looked into my eyes and wrapped her arms over my shoulders. Then she glanced over at Matt. "But you're a fantastic stunt cock," she cheerfully added."

Now in all fairness, the wife treats other men as "a piece of meat"! But that seems to be missed by the feminist commenter.

I didn’t take that as a feminist critique; it read more as “oh, you’ll actively fuck him, but then you’re just gonna starfish for me? Pass.”

 

[OverconfidentSarcasm]

One Anonymous comment said: "For me her saying that she will just lay there and you can use me any way you want is a real downer. So for her husband she is just a piece of meat. No way."

I have to admit... I also understood that line as "You can have your fun with my body, but you're gonna have to do it yourself. I'm not gonna participate beyond being here."

Maybe it's because of the general theme of the story, I don't know...

 

[Lifestyle66]

I have to admit... I also understood that line as "You can have your fun with my body, but you're gonna have to do it yourself. I'm not gonna participate beyond being here."

Maybe it's because of the general theme of the story, I don't know...

It is. But that's the attitude of the MFC: "It's all about ME, but I'll still take care of my husband."

 

[NoTalentHack]

It is. But that's the attitude of the MFC: "It's all about ME, but I'll still take care of my husband."

Right, which is… kind of selfish? And I get that, especially in the context, but it’s one of those “show, don’t tell” things. Earlier in the story, you say that there are times where she’ll focus completely on him, but we don’t actually see that. We only see her being selfish.

I think it could have been structured a little differently. If it had instead been him saying, “I want you, but not if you’re too tired.” And her saying something like “never too tired for you,” and him seeing she was too exhausted to be an active participant and then him saying “shh, just enjoy yourself,” it would have gone off more as two lovers in tune with each others’ needs.

I get what you’re going for. It’s hot and sweet IF one is actively trying to read it that way. But if they’re not, it comes off as less-so.

ETA: FWIW, I really liked this one.

 

[Lifestyle66]

Right, which is… kind of selfish? And I get that, especially in the context, but it’s one of those “show, don’t tell” things. Earlier in the story, you say that there are times where she’ll focus completely on him, but we don’t actually see that. We only see her being selfish.

I think it could have been structured a little differently. If it had instead been him saying, “I want you, but not if you’re too tired.” And her saying something like “never too tired for you,” and him seeing she was too exhausted to be an active participant and then him saying “shh, just enjoy yourself,” it would have gone off more as two lovers in tune with each others’ needs.

I get what you’re going for. It’s hot and sweet IF one is actively trying to read it that way. But if they’re not, it comes off as less-so.

ETA: FWIW, I really liked this one.

I have to admit... I also understood that line as "You can have your fun with my body, but you're gonna have to do it yourself. I'm not gonna participate beyond being here."

Maybe it's because of the general theme of the story, I don't know...

Earlier in the story, the husband/MC says neither he nor his wife view sex as love, but just as a physical release.

In that scene, he shows her his need (hard-on at a nude resort), and she recognized his role in setting her up for her release with the boy-toy. So, she willingly agreed to take care of it,but she was just basking in her own afterglow. He didn't use her mouth or ass. He took "sloppy seconds", in deference to her minimal effort.

But as we're finding even here in our own back & forth, we each go into these stories with our own perceptions and expectations. So, we each interpret a scene in our own way.

 

[NoTalentHack]

Earlier in the story, the husband/MC says neither he nor his wife view sex as love, but just as a physical release.

Sure, but even in that very scene, she refers to him as “her only lover.” There’s a disconnect there, at least to me. They may not view sex AS love, but clearly they at least tacitly admit that there’s sex WITH love and sex without, which brings us back to “this seems kind of selfish in that context.” It’s very easy to read that, instead of “just a release” as “I’ll put the effort in for a new fuckbuddy, but not for you.”

Again, like you said, different viewpoints. And these characters, as you’ve said before, are kind of broken, but their broken pieces fit together. There’s an inherent storytelling issue with that, though: they fit with each other, but maybe not the reader.

They both (especially the husband) read as very neurodivergent. And as someone who is, too? It’s very hard to make ND folks make sense to neurotypical people.

 

[OverconfidentSarcasm]

He took "sloppy seconds", in deference to her minimal effort.

Great! So, neither I nor that commenter misunderstood that line.

I mean, disassociating sex from love is fine with me. But then also not caring about your husband's fun because she's too consumed by enjoying her own, also disassociates the love from every other aspect of their marriage. It's like telling your beloved spouse that there's a TV Dinner in the microwave before leaving to visit a steakhouse yourself. It doesn't exactly spell "I care for you".

Now, in the grand scheme of their marriage, this very well may be an isolated incident that is usually offset in their regular love life, but we don't know anything about their regular love life apart from that one fleeting sidenote you added at the beginning. As far as we can see, this is how these two people usually are. And, for many people, it's just... sad.

 

[Lifestyle66]

Great! So, neither I nor that commenter misunderstood that line.

I mean, disassociating sex from love is fine with me. But then also not caring about your husband's fun because she's too consumed by enjoying her own, also disassociates the love from every other aspect of their marriage. It's like telling your beloved spouse that there's a TV Dinner in the microwave before leaving to visit a steakhouse yourself. It doesn't exactly spell "I care for you".

Now, in the grand scheme of their marriage, this very well may be an isolated incident that is usually offset in their regular love life, but we don't know anything about their regular love life apart from that one fleeting sidenote you added at the beginning. As far as we can see, this is how these two people usually are. And, for many people, it's just... sad.

The problem I've realized in writing these stories is that regardless of the effort I take to portray the character in a way to address such critics, the critics will always skip over the details and react with their preconceived notions.

For example, in this particular story, to address your criticism of she's not caring for her husband's fun and too consumed with her own, the husband explained in the prologue:
"And she knew how to make every time with me seem special, learning new techniques or finding the best sensitive spots on my body. Sometimes, she would just focus on sucking my cock, as if to say, 'This is all about YOUR pleasure tonight!'"

This is how they love each other, giving each other what they see the other needs at the time. In this story at the resort, the husband saw his wife's lust for a guy she thought was unapproachable (since his wife wasn't there), so he prodded her to go for it outside of their own usual rules together. And the wife told her husband to use her anyway he wanted afterwards, because she realized what he did with his texts to give her the experience she craved.

The commenter saying the husband treated her like a piece of meat ignored her treatment of men with her flirting ways and missed that part of both of them viewing sex as just a physical release, but always willing to take care of each other.