Older Male Seeking Female Friends Who Can Tolerate "Dad Jokes"

[NCneedslove_18]

Why don’t oysters donate to charity?

Because they’re shellfish…

 

[NCneedslove_18]

When my wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo.

I had to put my foot down

 

[Deadbed1968]

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb?

One,
.

 

[Deadbed1968]

The past, present, and future walked into a bar,

It was tense…

 

[Deadbed1968]

What’s the dumbest animal in the jungle?

A Polar Bear!

 

[Deadbed1968]

I like to spend every day as if it was my last…


Staying in bed and calling for a nurse to bring me more pudding.

 

[Deadbed1968]

What did the Buddhist say to the Hot Dog vendor?


Make me one with everything.

 

[Deadbed1968]

My new thesaurus is terrible…


Not only that but it’s also terrible

 

[Deadbed1968]

Did you hear about the nationwide shredded cheese shortage?


It’s time to make America grate again!

 

[NCneedslove_18]

What did the momma cow say to her babies?

It’s pasture bedtime

 

[NCneedslove_18]

Why are cows such good dancers?

Because they have mooves
- yes that’s a loud groan