New sub Haven

*chuckles*

thanks, i think..

And we would welcome you at Lit chat anytime.. it isn't such a bad place if you have a good sense of humor.. I believe you have probably met kayte, dragonlace and some of the other regular D/s room chatters..

Stop in, anytime..
 
His_sugar said:
*chuckles*

thanks, i think..

And we would welcome you at Lit chat anytime.. it isn't such a bad place if you have a good sense of humor.. I believe you have probably met kayte, dragonlace and some of the other regular D/s room chatters..

Stop in, anytime..

There's a Lit chat?
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: aaaaaaaawwwwwwww

Johnny Mayberry said:
LOL, I think I will...how bad can it be?

Well it really depends on how susceptible to flattery you are.
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: aaaaaaaawwwwwwww

Johnny Mayberry said:
Not very...chat is not for me, it is all too hollow.

Chat Rooms bring out the "evil bitch Domme" in Me.
 
The thing is...even with as little as I know about you, JM, I think you'd be much more terrifying dominating real life than online. Easy to have no limits when we're online, y'know?
 
Quint said:
The thing is...even with as little as I know about you, JM, I think you'd be much more terrifying dominating real life than online. Easy to have no limits when we're online, y'know?

LOL, I am pure fun in real life....if evil=fun, that is!
 
I have decided that this is the most important thread on this board. Here, new submissives will hopefully see the truth. Unlike the smoke that some of the regulars blow up their ass, not all relationships are good, it is NOT alright to ruin your family because you are horny...and no matter what anyone tells you, if you feel like you are being abused, YOU ARE BEING ABUSED. Some people around here think it is ok for a Dom to make a sub feel useless...hopefully no one listens to them, but I'm sure some do.
 
Johnny Mayberry said:
Some people around here think it is ok for a Dom to make a sub feel useless...hopefully no one listens to them, but I'm sure some do.

I feel compelled to say that no Dom/me has the power to make you feel useless, unless:

a) you already feel that way

b) you allow it.

If you are an adult, you must take responsibility for yourself. We only get one set of parents in this life.
 
Ebonyfire said:
I feel compelled to say that no Dom/me has the power to make you feel useless, unless:

a) you already feel that way

b) you allow it.

If you are an adult, you must take responsibility for yourself. We only get one set of parents in this life.

See, Eb, what I think happens is that some submissives think that they have to allow themselves to be abused, or it is 'cheating', you know? I'm here to set the record straight.
 
I go away for a long weekend and miss all the fun!!! This was hysterically funny. Thank you JM and the rest of you for one of the best reads in a long time... :D

And since it has taken on a serious tone in the last page, I'd like to add something on subs thinking they have to put up with being abused.

IMHO it boils down to a submissive knowing who s/he is and what s/he needs. REALLY understanding h/er needs. Of course most submissives mold themselves in order to please a Dominant, healthy ones mold themselves within the context of their own needs.

Unhealthy ones, have difficulty setting limits and boundaries and therefore cannot adequately inform the Dominant regarding his/her boundaries.

In the (hysterically funny because they are oh so true) examples...

Pushing for a telephone number because a Dominant needs to reassure himself that the person on the other end is indeded a female is a ligitimate rationale and that's why it works so often. But, it pales compared to giving up real life information to a total stranger who needs to feel better about who he is talking to and is an inability to set boundaries for one's own safety.

Pushing for a webcam exchange, is often presented in exaclty the same manner, and the submissive feels she has to prove who she is... But it pales compared to the very real possibility and probablity that it is a live feed on a porn site.

The Interent is a playground of instant cyber-gratification and many, many people play into that. What I have seen, expereinced and been told, leads me to believe that one of the primary reasons submissives are 'easy targets', is because of the unfocused (as opposed to a focused one) need to please..... please anyone! Using the need to serve against the submissive in order to obtain that instant cyber gratification. And unfortunately it works all too often.

One of the reasons this was soooooo funny is because we have all experienced at least one of those 'demands' and lived to tell the tale.

FWIW, IMHO D/s is all about time, development, and trust. Trust cannot be asked for and delivered in a 10 minute chat, a MB or a pm for that matter, it evoles over time and experience. While one of the hardest things for most to do is wait, besides a soul of service, it is the one true gift of the submissive, the gift of patience, the ability to endure and to wait.

I'd urge anyone, Dom/me or submissive, to use time wisely even on line... It is the stuff that allows for real trust to develop.. Nothing else does this. Time allows for actions to speak for both D & s, time allows for promises to be kept, time allows for warts to appear, time allows for respect to be given, accepted and understood, time allows for consistency, time allows for it all to happen on its own.

Take your time, learn, discover, enjoy each step along the way.. there is no door prize for Dominating in 10 minutes or less, or submitting in 10 minutes or less... Honest!

Just my 2 cents....

~ Cait
 
Thanks Caitlynne, and I am glad you enjoyed the thread!

Instant gratification can often lead down a dangerous path. I hope some of what I posted on the first few pages helps the new subs not get trapped. I have no illusion that online Doms will get the message, though.
 
Johnny Mayberry said:
Thanks Caitlynne, and I am glad you enjoyed the thread!

Instant gratification can often lead down a dangerous path. I hope some of what I posted on the first few pages helps the new subs not get trapped. I have no illusion that online Doms will get the message, though.

An interesting qualification!!
 
Caitlynne said:
I go away for a long weekend and miss all the fun!!! This was hysterically funny. Thank you JM and the rest of you for one of the best reads in a long time... :D

And since it has taken on a serious tone in the last page, I'd like to add something on subs thinking they have to put up with being abused.

IMHO it boils down to a submissive knowing who s/he is and what s/he needs. REALLY understanding h/er needs. Of course most submissives mold themselves in order to please a Dominant, healthy ones mold themselves within the context of their own needs.

Unhealthy ones, have difficulty setting limits and boundaries and therefore cannot adequately inform the Dominant regarding his/her boundaries.

In the (hysterically funny because they are oh so true) examples...

Pushing for a telephone number because a Dominant needs to reassure himself that the person on the other end is indeded a female is a ligitimate rationale and that's why it works so often. But, it pales compared to giving up real life information to a total stranger who needs to feel better about who he is talking to and is an inability to set boundaries for one's own safety.

Pushing for a webcam exchange, is often presented in exaclty the same manner, and the submissive feels she has to prove who she is... But it pales compared to the very real possibility and probablity that it is a live feed on a porn site.

The Interent is a playground of instant cyber-gratification and many, many people play into that. What I have seen, expereinced and been told, leads me to believe that one of the primary reasons submissives are 'easy targets', is because of the unfocused (as opposed to a focused one) need to please..... please anyone! Using the need to serve against the submissive in order to obtain that instant cyber gratification. And unfortunately it works all too often.

One of the reasons this was soooooo funny is because we have all experienced at least one of those 'demands' and lived to tell the tale.

FWIW, IMHO D/s is all about time, development, and trust. Trust cannot be asked for and delivered in a 10 minute chat, a MB or a pm for that matter, it evoles over time and experience. While one of the hardest things for most to do is wait, besides a soul of service, it is the one true gift of the submissive, the gift of patience, the ability to endure and to wait.

I'd urge anyone, Dom/me or submissive, to use time wisely even on line... It is the stuff that allows for real trust to develop.. Nothing else does this. Time allows for actions to speak for both D & s, time allows for promises to be kept, time allows for warts to appear, time allows for respect to be given, accepted and understood, time allows for consistency, time allows for it all to happen on its own.

Take your time, learn, discover, enjoy each step along the way.. there is no door prize for Dominating in 10 minutes or less, or submitting in 10 minutes or less... Honest!

Just my 2 cents....

~ Cait

A very wonderful post!
 
Johnny Mayberry said:
See, Eb, what I think happens is that some submissives think that they have to allow themselves to be abused, or it is 'cheating', you know? I'm here to set the record straight.

I think this thread does that very well, don't you?
 
Johnny Mayberry said:
Come to Me, My little newbie subbies. Come, kneel at My feet, and let a powerful Dom like Myself train you in the ways of submission. Gather around, slaves, subs, pets...let Me teach you, guide you through your journey. Submit to my words, allow yourself to be led by Me. I will show you such marvelous things, like how to pick out a slave name, how to attract online predators, and good advice on how to leave your husband for a complete stranger who lives 1000+ miles away. Yes, My little ones, let Me show you the P/proper W/way T/to P/post messages on a board. Yes, and I will even show you how to sign your life away to an abusive 'Dom', in some foolish 'contract', that you just know you have to have because you read about it in a story. Come, let Me collar you all, and then make you regret it for years to come.

Lemme get a piece of the action, Johnny......
 
Cait~ I must say that was wonderfully well put.

Johnny even while we had fun , mainly you just me enjoying a little portion of it. I also think that a lot of valid points were made. This could hopefully be a thread where stupid things we all see happen will prevent others from making that mistake.
 
Can JM come out and play?

I need to laugh... missing the Master of Masters JohnnyOnlineDom.

:D
 
This should be required reading for anyone having a bad day. If you can't get a laugh out of this (and some serious thought!) you just can't be helped...........
 
Master_Vassago said:
Cait~ I must say that was wonderfully well put.

Johnny even while we had fun , mainly you just me enjoying a little portion of it. I also think that a lot of valid points were made. This could hopefully be a thread where stupid things we all see happen will prevent others from making that mistake.

One can only hope that a miracle can happen, and subs find out the TRUTH.
 
lassarina said:
This should be required reading for anyone having a bad day. If you can't get a laugh out of this (and some serious thought!) you just can't be helped...........

I was hitting both angles, wasn't I?!!
 
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