new story

[icebaby]

younger man older b.b.w story
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=70978&page=1000


other stories by icebaby

http://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=155604

 

[damppanties]

Hi icebaby,

Major editing needed. Grammar not right - to start with. Need help?

 

[icebaby]

re feedback

Hi DP
i will E,mail u tonight thanks

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Your links don't work for me.


---dr.M.

 

[icebaby]

re links not working

Hi i can not understand why they are not working for you,
i just double checked them and they seem fine if anyone else has found a problem with the links can they let me know please


story can be found in mature

>> making a man of peter


thanks icebaby

 

[NoJo]

younger man older b.b.w story
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=70978&page=1000


other stories by icebaby

http://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=155604

Now your first link is
first link is alive, and so is your second link!

 

[dr_mabeuse]

The story's not literate. I'm not going to read it.

Someone should have told you that the comma's been invented.

---dr.M.

 

[damppanties]

The story's not literate. I'm not going to read it.

Someone should have told you that the comma's been invented.

---dr.M.

doc, perhaps you could have taken the trouble to help her with it instead of just 'wishing' someone else did. Try making your comments more helpful and less antagonistic. It would be a better place.

Another thing, her link would have worked if you'd copied and pasted it in your browser instead of just clicking on it. It worked for me.

icebaby, got your mail. I'll write back in one or two days.

 

[TheCount]

coulda been worse.....

At least what the good doctor said WAS useful, if not exactly helpful, unlike some people who just spew out useless psychobabble crap like, "distracting", "tedious", and (dare i say it?), "uninspiring".

I just went thru the first story and fixed the punctuation, leaving as much of the story itself intact as possible. It's not perfect, but it should help you get a better idea of how it should look, Icebaby.

Now if you could persuade DP to go over some of the rules of punctuation with you (hint ), you'd have an example in front of you to help you grasp it better.

Hope this helps you out.


TheCount ^o^

 

[icebaby]

re feedback

Hi thanks for feedback i am glad to say i have recived more good than bad, Thanks Dp look forward to hearing from you and to all who have sent e,mails all good i might add, thank you very much,

i am not to worried about some of the comments recived because
7716 views> 49 votes > and a rating of 4.33 in the 2 days it has been posted shows somebody must like it? thanks again all

 

[icebaby]

re new story

Hi the edited version of this story is now up and running I would like to say a big thanks to Damp panties and the Count for all their help, and to everyone who has sent such great feedback by e,mail
cheers guys

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=70978