Misquote the Person Above You {2016}

[MichaelinChina]

Really! Are you THAT bored?!

Not bored as much as totally fed up! (I am hungry actually, gotta go soon. great anecdote btw Uncle Tio)

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Not boned as much as totally fucked up! (I am hungry actually, gotta go soon. great anecdote btw Uncle Tio)

Maybe you should try therapy.

I'm off too, Michael. Enjoy your meal.

 

[MichaelinChina]

Maybe you should cry for that ape!

I'm off too, Michael. Enjoy your meal.

Oh I am, and I am cursing the inadequate fencing at the zoo and the inattention of the parents.

 

[Penuche]

I eat spam

Your poor tastebuds.

 

[MichaelinChina]

You're as boring as custard!

Well, that's the most inventive insult I have ever received. Thanks my little blancmange!

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Well, that's the most inventive insertion I have ever received. Thanks for my little mangeoire!

This one's for feeding birds, you fool!

 

[loquere]

Take a shower you stinky fool!

Showers are against my religion.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Whores are against my nether regions.

Is that "against" as in "opposed to" or as in "next to'" it makes a world of difference, you realize.

 

[MagicaPractica]

I'm against that kind of oppositional wrangling in general. Viva la difference!

I agree! The battle of the sexes is so passe.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

I agree! The bottle for sex is to be passed.

Yes! A toast to the pleasures of the flesh!

 

[MagicaPractica]

Yes! A toast to the pleasures of the plushies!

I confess, this is something that I have no interest in or understanding of.

 

[AlwaysSoaked]

I confess, this is something that I have no interest in or understanding of.

I confess, Magica's eyes are stunning. She is also kind.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

I profess that Magica's eyes are runny. She is so that kind.

Are you saying she's infectious and contagious? And uncaring about spreading her diseases?

By the way, Soaked, it isn't an "I confess" thread; it's a "misquote the poster" thread. Take a look at how the quotes are changed by the next poster.)

 

[MagicaPractica]

You're contagious! Stop sneezing on me!

It's just allergies!

 

[Tio_Narratore]

It's just surgery!

I think you may be downplaying it, Mrs. Bobbitt.

 

[MichaelinChina]

What's that in your hand, Mrs. Bobbitt?

Oh,,,, it's a carving knife...for the Sunday roast...and the thing in my other hand is not my husband's cock

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Oh,,,, it's a caring wife...with the Sunday roast...her husband's a cook

What a lovely scene of domestic affection!

 

[MichaelinChina]

A yeast infection?!

Yes, and I wonder who gave it to me.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Yes, and Wonder Woman does it for me.

Like the idea of being roped by the lasso of truth, eh?

 

[MichaelinChina]

Like the time I was groped by the lasses of Groote?

Oh you're familiar with the highly promiscuous women of Groote Eylandt then?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Oh you're familiar with the highly prominent women of Gortnahoe, Ireland then?

More familiar than their husband's would accept. Thank goodness it's a long way to Tipperary!

 

[MichaelinChina]

Trying to picture Axl Rose singing 'It's a Long Way to the Top If You Wanna Rock and Roll'..in a wheelchair!

Axl Rose will NEVER be as good as Bon Scott!

 

[loquere]

Axel Foley is a shit detective!

Hey jackass HE'S THE BEST DETECTIVE WHO"S EVER LIVED!!!!!

 

[Rollinbones]

CURSE MY DEFECTIVE LIVER!!!!!

I'll drink to that.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

I stink like a bat.

What do expect living in a guano-filled cave?