Michigan Lady?

[the_tom_cat]

Well...

the dreaming stops...

Let me know when the garden tub is installed and the dream will live again...

Dr King would be proud of me...

 

[rozezwild]

Roze be careful...that water, though not as cold as Lake Superior...now that's figid, could make your nipples SO hard that anything bumping against them may break them off!!!

I'm heading back to the Caribbean in a month, come go with me. Water is 83!


Tom...my bathtub wouldn't hold us both, I'm still waiting for my garden tub!

OH hell yeah -- i want 83 degree water

 

[the_tom_cat]

What a coincidence!!!

I want 83 women!!!

Just kidding Kendra…

I just want you…

Wish you worked in corrections because that is where I am headed right now on vacation…

See ya this evening..

Spiderman III tonight!!

Cannot wait for the dreams I will have…

You have red hair don’t ya???

 

[kendra1980]

OH hell yeah -- i want 83 degree water

Maybe I'll just pack you up in my suitcase, Roze, and take you with me.

Girls week away! I am so looking forward to this. Will help after all the hurting of late.

My friend told me she was showing up at the airport with a gallon of rum punch for us all.

 

[kendra1980]

I want 83 women!!!

Just kidding Kendra…

I just want you…

Wish you worked in corrections because that is where I am headed right now on vacation…

See ya this evening..

Spiderman III tonight!!

Cannot wait for the dreams I will have…

You have red hair don’t ya???

83 women? Well, I've always said, if you are going to dream, dream big. That is one freaking big dream, Tom!

You are going to corrections for vacation? Whatever for?

Enjoy the movie, Mary Jane has red hair in that movie. But here's the question, you will go to the movies to see Spiderman and have dreams of him? Sounds a wee bit homo erotic... Did *I* just antagonize you? Maybe you're right

I want to see Knocked Up. I liked 40 Year Old Virgin, and this movie seems to have the same vibe.

Have a good day, and I can't remember if this is when you head north (or is it tomorrow...see I don't catch it all either), if so, safe travels.

~K

 

[rozezwild]

Maybe I'll just pack you up in my suitcase, Roze, and take you with me.

Girls week away! I am so looking forward to this. Will help after all the hurting of late.

My friend told me she was showing up at the airport with a gallon of rum punch for us all.

WOOOHOOOOOOO rum punch is good

baby go and have fun and relax that is what you need

 

[the_tom_cat]

Kendra baby cakes...

TOMorrow morning I split... and there is NO WAY I am going to go to work until Monday... of course I am vacation till the next Thursday... butt money is what keeps my toys in the garage...

 

[the_tom_cat]

Laptop...

btw, I take my laptop everywhere.... Well, not on the Ausable butt will be in the hotel... I will be out of touch much of Thursday butt I will get ya back on Friday...

homophobic?? me??

I believe in gay rights... they all have the right to see a psychiatrist...

 

[rozezwild]

btw, I take my laptop everywhere.... Well, not on the Ausable butt will be in the hotel... I will be out of touch much of Thursday butt I will get ya back on Friday...

homophobic?? me??

I believe in gay rights... they all have the right to see a psychiatrist...

Lord you are bad

 

[the_tom_cat]

I prefer....

To say I am good... quite good...

Just bed in behavior butt good all other ways...

 

[the_tom_cat]

Yes ladies...

I am still out here!!!



This aught to get even the "stick up your ass" types a giggle...


http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=922226162

 

[the_tom_cat]

Kid brother...

http://www.winthelotto.net/littlebrother.wmv

 

[the_tom_cat]

One more for my Harem...

http://www.winthelotto.net/dog_video_1.wmv

 

[the_tom_cat]

2029

Headlines from the year 2029!

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California .


White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Baby conceived naturally - - scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica .

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays on ly.

85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.



Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.

 

[the_tom_cat]

I must of killed all the babes with laughter...

So how is my World Wide Harem doing???

Babes??? come out and play!!!

ULTIMATE FEMALE JOKE

It has long been contended that there are male jokes and
there are female jokes, and there are unisex jokes.
Here is a joke I consider a true female joke. I offer it to you in the
hopes that women will love it and men will pass it along to a
woman who will love it.

A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after work cocktail with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy, middle-aged man entered.
He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes off him. The young-at-heart man noticed her overly attentive stare and walked directly toward her.
Before she could offer her apologies for staring so rudely,
he leaned over and whispered to her, "I'll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $20.00......on one condition."

Flabbergasted, the woman asked what the condition was. The man
replied, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words."

The woman considered his proposition for a moment, and then slowly removed a $20 bill from her purse, which she pressed into the man's hand along with her address.
She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly and meaningfully said....

"Clean my house."

 

[the_tom_cat]

Rodney...

Why we miss Rodney Dangerfield




WE MISS RODNEY DANGERFIELD, BECAUSE . . ..

He said . .. .

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me to
time an egg.

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she
won't drink from my glass!

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy
negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home.

A girl phoned me and said, "Come on over. There's nobody home."
I went over. Nobody was home!

A hooker once told me she had a headache.

I went to a massage parlor. It was self service.

If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.

I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you
going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate mys elf
now."

I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's when
you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head comes off.

I knew a girl so ugly, they use her in prisons to cure sex offenders.

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the
roaches hang themselves.

I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.

The other day I came home and a guy was jogging, naked. I asked him,
"Why?"
He said, "Because you came home early."

My wife's such a bad cook, the do g begs for Alka-Seltzer.

I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the
Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal.

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex; she called me from
Chicago last night.

My family was so poor that if I hadn't been born a boy, I wouldn't of
had anything to play with

 

[the_tom_cat]

You gotta love me... ( please.... )

Subject: INNOCENCE IS PRICELESS




Sunday morning, the priest noticed little Alex standing in the foyer
of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names

and had small American flags mounted on either side of it.



The seven year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the
priest walked up, stood beside the little boy,and said quietly:"Good
morning, Alex."

"Good morning, Father, what is this?" he asked the priest .

He answered, "Well, son, it's a memorial plaque to all
the young men and women who died in the Service."

Soberly, they just stood together, staring at the large plaque.
Finally, little Alex's voice, barely audible and trembling with fear,
asked .........






"Which service, the 8:30 or the 10:45?"

 

[the_tom_cat]

Subject: High Urinals

Subject: High Urinals

High Urinals
A group of 3rd, 4th and 5th graders, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to the local racetrack (Churchill Downs) to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry (Bourbon), but mostly to see the horses.



When it was time to take the children to the bathroom it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.



The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's room when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal.



Having no choice, she went inside, helped the boys with their pants, and began hoisting the little boys up one by one, holding on to their "wee-wees" to direct the flow away from their clothes. As she lifted one, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed.



Trying not to show that she was staring the teacher said, "You must be in the 5th grade."
"No, ma'am", he replied. "I'm the jockey riding Silver Arrow in the seventh race, but I appreciate your help."

 

[the_tom_cat]

Ladies....

I am honestly a romantic...

I open doors...

I put your coat on and take it off...

YET this is still one of the funniest videos I have seen in a while...

http://www.winthelotto.net/romance_is_dead.mpg

 

[the_tom_cat]

Suprised...

I did not get any hate mail over that....

There has to be one local hottie out there with a married man fetish...

 

[comeout2play]

Good lord. Nice socks on that man!

 

[the_tom_cat]

I just wonder...

How they came up with the idea?

I still thinking plugging her nose is hilarious...

 

[the_tom_cat]

Still working on lotto data...

that I can't win with...

Yet for some odd reason people pay me for....

Hope ya like the pic!!!

 

[the_tom_cat]

Sure would be easy too be...

an internet stalker around here....

Fatal Attractions scare the piss out of me...

 

[the_tom_cat]

Miss ya guys...

Been busy in my "free time" fixing computers...

Hopefully being on day shift M-W this week I can come by and harass, I mean make more comments and answer some questions...



I never forget....