Men's Guide on Women.

[Greyface]

First thing one should realize is that female version of the species isn't the most rational of creatures; they are not only moody but have a very poor grasp of logic and have a tendency to alter their opinion of any given situation almost without warning. As such, one should never attempt to reason with them on a level above their capacity.

Talk down to their level, speak slowly, and make sure that they understand what you are saying before you move on to the next concept. If a female is upset, stop; it will only complicate matters if you continue to reason with them. If they become too upset to control or contain, it is best just to slip them some type of sedative.

Some women, however, will take the sedatives themselves, if you convince them it's in their best interest, as I have done for my wife.

The *most* important thing to realize about women is that they love sex. I know what you are thinking, "Sex is only for procreation; one must not over do it." While this is true, most women do not think this is true; they falsely believe that sex is a sign of some type of emotional sincerity. As such, it is best to have sex with them at least once a month, preferably before their period.

If you take my advice seriously, you will surely learn how to better control and communicate with your significant other. Seriously.

 

[lisalove]

Finally! A man who understands women.

 

[Greyface]

I'm glad you see that; it's very rare indeed to fine a lady whom is willing to admit the faults of their own sex.

 

[CarolineOh]

First thing one should realize is that female version of the species isn't the most rational of creatures; they are not only moody but have a very poor grasp of logic and have a tendency to alter their opinion of any given situation almost without warning. As such, one should never attempt to reason with them on a level above their capacity.

Talk down to their level, speak slowly, and make sure that they understand what you are saying before you move on to the next concept. If a female is upset, stop; it will only complicate matters if you continue to reason with them. If they become too upset to control or contain, it is best just to slip them some type of sedative.

Some women, however, will take the sedatives themselves, if you convince them it's in their best interest, as I have done for my wife.

The *most* important thing to realize about women is that they love sex. I know what you are thinking, "Sex is only for procreation; one must not over do it." While this is true, most women do not think this is true; they falsely believe that sex is a sign of some type of emotional sincerity. As such, it is best to have sex with them at least once a month, preferably before their period.

If you take my advice seriously, you will surely learn how to better control and communicate with your significant other. Seriously.

Huh? I'm not sure I'm following you.

 

[Ice Cold]

Ahhh... but arne't they ever so pretty to look at...

 

[Wiggles]

Wow, you should write relationship manuals.

What a genius!

 

[unclej]

my, my, my......i believe i'm just gonna ease on outta here before the shit starts flying

 

[Sillyman]

So kind of like small children except without the sex part?

 

[Greyface]

Re: Re: Men's Guide on Women.

Huh? I'm not sure I'm following you.

That post was for the men, sweetie. Go back to cooking, and don't worry you're little head about it. I promise, it will be alright.

 

[CarolineOh]

Wow, you should write relationship manuals.

What a genius!

Hey Wiggles, your av is really hot. And I'm not just saying that because someone slipped me sedatives either.

 

[Greyface]

So kind of like small children except without the sex part?

Exactly!

 

[Galileo's Cat]

"If you take my advice seriously, you will surely learn how to better control "

Why would you want to CONTROL somebody? and by the way yes women have faults but then again men do too! i think your a cheese head.

 

[Wiggles]

Hey Wiggles, your av is really hot. And I'm not just saying that because someone slipped me sedatives either.

Hey! Yours too!

But what are we doing in this 'mens thread'? Let's get back to knitting little booties.



Thankyou!

 

[Sillyman]

"If you take my advice seriously, you will surely learn how to better control "

Why would you want to CONTROL somebody? and by the way yes women have faults but then again men do too! i think your a cheese head.

Hey! Don't compare me to him!

 

[sacremento]

I'm with you unclej

But I will come back in to watch if I can find a clean corner to sit in

 

[Greyface]

"If you take my advice seriously, you will surely learn how to better control "

Why would you want to CONTROL somebody? and by the way yes women have faults but then again men do too! i think your a cheese head.

I think, sir, that you are not taking me seriously enough. What does it take for a man of good standing to gain some respect around here; it isn't like I've said any thing nasty to anyone who didn't deserve it, except Dillinger, although he deserved it.

You must be one of those discordians who abhor law and order. Well hear me; I am a pillar of this community, and I will not abide well by you calling me a "cheese head." You, sir, are not deserving of my attention any longer.

 

[CarolineOh]

Hey! Yours too!

But what are we doing in this 'mens thread'? Let's get back to knitting little booties.



Thankyou!

Well, if we leave, who's going to clean up the mess behind them?

 

[perks]

I want to cook for you, greyface.

 

[Galileo's Cat]

sillyman...i apologize... but don't i have you on paperback some where??? so he's not a cheesehead, he is an empty trashcan that no one goes near because it smells to bad.

 

[CarolineOh]

I want to cook for you, greyface.

I want to take handfulls of sedatives and have emotionally sincere sex with him just before my period.

 

[Wiggles]

Well, if we leave, who's going to clean up the mess behind them?

*Gasp!* You're right!

Let's go sit in the corner quietly with our heads bowed politely.

(Quick! Your ankles uncovered Caroline, they'll think you're a whore!)

 

[Greyface]

I want to take handfulls of sedatives and have emotionally sincere sex with him just before my period.

I am married; the very thought of having sex with another woman besides my wife is repulsing.

 

[CarolineOh]

I am married; the very thought of having sex with another woman besides my wife is repulsing.

Well, since you are only doing her once a month, maybe me and her can hook up.

 

[christophe]

this is a joke thread...right? if its not I am getting the hell out of here

 

[Guest]

Ok, no sex. Just fucking eat me, k?