Marriage success

[WriterDom]

Is it better to marry someone who you've grown to love as a friend for a long time.

Or someone you fell in love with at first sight and had/have incredible sex with.

Or is it just some big crap shoot.

 

[Weevil]

Is it better to marry someone who you've grown to love as a friend for a long time.

Or someone you fell in love with at first sight and had/have incredible sex with.

Well, I've only been married the once so i can't compare. My relationship with E fits into both of those categories.

 

[lilfrk]

Other

He's my best friend and he fucks me silly. Been with him almost 14 years.

 

[Guest]

Hrm.
Well, I only have one marriage to base my answers upon.
I do know, in my experience, the love at first sight/great sex combo does not outlast a committed partnership. I've had both types of relationships. While the intensity and excitement of the great sex is wonderful, I need comfort, security, and friendship to help me along bumps in life. You can have a partnership that involves great sex, friendship, and butterflies in the tummy. But, it takes work. There are days I'm in love and days I'm not so in love.

 

[Gilly Bean]

For me and my hubby, Lekov, we clicked when we met. Well, not the first night we met, but by the 2nd time we met, we did. We became best friends after we started dating, and within a few months, we were engaged, then married. It will be 4 years this summer, and we have 3 children.

 

[WriterDom]

So where is the divorced crowd?

 

[seXieleXie]

yay! kitties back in WD's av!

my parents have known each other since they were in kindergarten. they started dating when they were juniors in high school. they got engaged shortly after graduation. they got married when my father graduated from college. they have been together ever since.

i don't care to venture a guess about their sex life though

 

[WriterDom]

yay! kitties back in WD's av!

Yeah, she loves him in spite of his wicked ways.

 

[fgarvb1]

HA! Damned if i know!

A lot of love, A lot of deep thought, A lot of good sex, and a lot of luck. Then roll the dice. yep, thats about it.

Some people are so damn lucky in love they make me mutter under my breath. Most of them don't even know they lucked out.

 

[kotori]

a few slight changes

to Gilly Bean's answer, and you'd have mine.

For me and my hubby, Lekov, we clicked when we met. Well, not the first night we met, but by the 2nd time we met, we did. We became best friends after we started dating, and within a few months, we were engaged, then married. It will be 4 years this summer, and we have 3 children.

Make "hubby, Lekov" into "wife, M";
Make "4 years this summer" into "18 years";
Make "3 children" into "2 children"

But to answer the original question, Crap Shoot

 

[SilverVeil]

Is it better to marry someone who you've grown to love as a friend for a long time.

Or someone you fell in love with at first sight and had/have incredible sex with.

Or is it just some big crap shoot.

I had to vote for other ....

My ex and I are a prime example of " Why ruin a fantastic friendship with marriage ? "

We made a great husband and wife .... just not to each other. And we have remained best friends since we split up. We even lived together again for a while when money was tight for both of us. ( 2 bedroom apt though )

Someone you fall in love with at first sight and have incredible sex with is great .... while it lasts. There has to be more substance than that. I have fucked a couple of guys that while the sex was great .... the conversation during the no sex times was really lacking.

And a crap shoot is a little too random.

If you find someone when you least expect to fall in love, get to know each other over time and build a relationship together and become best friends, and discover that the sex you have is FANFUCKINGTASTICK !!!! well then, you have all the colors of the jelly beans in one jar and are truly one of the luckiest sons-of-bitches in the world. ( I resemble that label too ! !! )

 

[seXieleXie]

Yeah, she loves him in spite of his wicked ways.

i just wanna cuddle them. they look so sweet!

 

[ksmybuttons]

I've fallen in and out of love with my husband several times. The thing that keeps us together is that we are best friends.

I read somewhere that you love the first time for great sex, the second time to have and raise a family and the third time for companionship. If you are lucky, you do it all with the person you marry the first time.

I married on the second. Didn't need to for the first. I wouldn't have given up great sex, or companionship just to have a family. We were married 7 years before we had a child...

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

So where is the divorced crowd?

Right here; I voted "best friend" as I know that having respect and love for your spouse works a lot better than good or great sex almost every time. YMMV, but I think most people agree on this issue.