..Making Her Orgasm

[BrizzleGuy]

Hi people, I've been a reader on here for a while, but only recently have I needed to ask something so I thought I'd post .

I'm 18, and this girl I'm seeing is 16, and we've just started having sex. We've done it twice now (our first 2 times for both of us), and it's really great. Only thing is, she doesn't and hasn't masturbated before, and none of us have came yet. I was quite surprised actually because both times we went for an hour and I didnt cum, which was surprising as I thought I'd come in about a second when I have sex . I think it's because I'm concentrating too much on her enjoying it, which is better I think. Anyways, as she hasn't masturbated before, I'm struggling to find out what she likes. Now the sex is awesome and she enjoys it, but i really really really want to make her cum, and I'm not sure how. I'm all up for giving her oral, but she's unsure because she thinks her wetness (she gets absolutely soaking ) will make it horrible for me, which I really dont mind, I just want her to cum, although she's changing her mind now. Is there any technique(s) or anything I could try in order to get her to cum? I know there's a Howto topic and all that stuff but I thought I'd start a new topic just as our situation might be a bit different.

Oh one more thing, and it seems ridiculously stupid but I need help . I know playing with her clit is a good way to get her going, but as she has been relatively unadventurous until she met me, she doesn't even know where her's is, and as this is my first girl I've had I'm hardly skilled in that department. Please refrain from laughing as much as you can .

Sorry for the long post. I just really want her to enjoy it as much as possible.

Thanks.

 

[buxxxom]

Sex between underage minors cannot be addressed at Literotica, in any way, shape, or form.

 

[SweetErika]

I can't tell you how to have sex with your underage girlfriend, but I can say that I'm all for teens exploring sites like this together:
http://www.teenwire.com/ (under "Body" there are diagrams and such that explain anatomy)
http://www.scarleteen.com/

As for your lack of knowledge pertaining to women and sex, I'd advise you to familiarize yourself with the female anatomy and sexuality. There's tons of great info here and elsewhere on the web if you do some searching. You might check out this thread, http://www.the-clitoris.com/ , and look into things like clitoral stimulation and vibrators for your own general education and future reference.

 

[octoma]

I'd like to add that your girlfriend is too young!! but, as far as orgasms go; my wife and I have been together for 7yrs and this year 2008 was the first time she had an orgasm (from oral, not penetration). Heck dont rush it. as guys we want to do our duty by making our women have earth shattering orgasms, but nature has a way of making sure we work hard for it.

take your time and just enjoy it, and what ever you do DONT PRESSURE HER ABOUT IT!! its the worst thing you can do.

 

[TBKahuna123]

You know, the more I see this kind of post the more I realize how lucky I and my wife are that she orgasms so easily. I asked her about this and she told me that she wasn't always this way. For her it has a lot to do with relaxation. She's totally at ease with me and always has been, thus its been easy for her. The more pressure a woman puts on her self, the harder she tries, the harder it is for her to achieve orgasm. If we as men put that kind of pressure on our partners, it makes it impossible for them to orgasm.

Just as a hint too, if WE try too hard to make them orgasm, that puts pressure on our partners too, because they feel like they are letting us down by not rewarding our efforts. You just have to care, explore, experiment, but not "try". Once you set orgasm as a goal, you start adding pressure to achieve that goal.

At least that's how I see it. I still only have women about 25% figured out.

 

[BrizzleGuy]

Sorry, I didn't realise I wasn't supposed to post this. At the end of the day she's anonymous, and I'm not a minor, but if that's the rules then I understand that. Sorry about that. Thanks for the posts/links.

 

[SweetErika]

Sorry, I didn't realise I wasn't supposed to post this. At the end of the day she's anonymous, and I'm not a minor, but if that's the rules then I understand that. Sorry about that. Thanks for the posts/links.

I agree with you in theory, and I certainly think minors should be educated on sexuality in age-appropriate ways, but as you said, those are the rules. It's a complex issue, but it comes down to talking/writing about sex that involves minors can be a very slippery slope, and this site could draw legal fire if it appears to be violating US laws. Because many/most of us deeply appreciate having a free, open-minded community with relatively few limits and don't want to see the owners get in trouble or the doors closed, we tend to be strict about following the rules we do have.

Here are the forum rules (there's also a link at the bottom of each page) for future reference, and you're certainly welcome to talk about anything that doesn't violate those rules. I'd also say that perhaps teen sexuality forums would be a better fit for your gf if you can find one(s) that give good info on the basics and discussion in general. Maybe you could start with sites like those I suggested earlier and use Lit to learn and clarify for yourself (basically, don't mention sexual activity with anyone under 18 in your posts).

 

[infinity706]

Well, I'm assuming she's legal. Afterall, in a lot of the western world, 16 is the age of consent. (yes, I know lit rules and all, but that's likely more because of the age to look at porn )

Here's another site that might help you out.
http://www.clitical.com/

 

[BrizzleGuy]

Yeah 16 is age of consent over here, and thanks a lot for the links and help, hopefully you've helped please someone's girlfriend a lot . If you guys require deleting this topic now then feel free, this advice should help. Apologies about the rule break, and thanks again.

 

[buxxxom]

It might be advisable for you to edit your initial post, deleting any reference to your girlfriend's age???

 

[swampian]

I'd buy a bullet vibrator and hold it gently at the top of her...uh, area. Most are multi speed and she can tell you which speed she likes best.

 

[infinity706]

Yeah 16 is age of consent over here, and thanks a lot for the links and help, hopefully you've helped please someone's girlfriend a lot . If you guys require deleting this topic now then feel free, this advice should help. Apologies about the rule break, and thanks again.

It's not that bad. Just remember for future reference not to mention that anyone may be less than 18 years old.

Well, go have fun showing your girlfriend what you learned on the internet.

 

[kevinwg4]

Well, your girl is a minor. It's not legal to have ANY sex acts with her. That's my advice. When she turns 18, let me know, okay?

 

[infinity706]

Well, your girl is a minor. It's not legal to have ANY sex acts with her. That's my advice. When she turns 18, let me know, okay?

He just said the age of consent where he lives is 16. Reading the thread is tech.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Hi BrizzleGuy

I'm in the UK, where the age of consent is 16 so I'm not going to comment on your gf's age because everyone else has already had their say. Also, I believe the rules on Lit state that discussion is ok about persons over 18 or 'legally adult in their country of residence.' In some countries, the age of consent still as low as 12, though I doubt their residents would be foolish enough to talk about a 12 year old on a site predominantly populated by north americans. If you were 50, I might think you were a pervert but as you're 18, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.

I understand your frustration about your girl's lack of self knowledge but at the same time, I don't see how it should be your responsibility to figure all this out for her. I admire your desire to pleasure her and do your research though.

If your gf is still not masturbating, you need to get her to start. Rather than focus on foreplay and sex, have a session where she just touches and explores herself. Once she knows what works, she can pass that info on to you. Also, sometimes when a girl is close to cumming it can feel like they need to pee if they're not used to the sensation. Have her use the toilet first so that this is not a worry and encourage her to persevere until she achieves a climax. You could maybe get her a vibrating toy for her to play with too. If she's nervous and shy, she might not be producing enough natural lubricant to enjoy herself without getting too sore so buy a tube of KY or a water based lube that works with condoms. Silicone based lube and things like baby oil can dissolve condoms and make them ineffective.

If you're also having trouble climaxing then you probably have the opposite problem - masturbating too frequently. Some guys can make themselves less sensitive by masturbating a lot because a girl's pussy is never going to be as tight or stimulating as a clenched fist. Leave off completely for a while and when you start again, make a point of being gentler and using a lubricant on your hand. 1 hour is far too long for penetrative sex and is probably making your gf too sore to climax. If you haven't managed it after 20 or 30 minutes, give up for that session and switch your focus to other things like mutual masturbation or oral.

I'm sure your gf will overcome her reluctance to let you go down on her once she sees how much you love her taste and smell. A common trick guys use is to draw the letters of the alphabet over her sex and then repeat the letters that get a positive response from her. Encourage her to be vocal and let you know when you're getting it right.

I hope you're using condoms. If your gf is not on a contraceptive pill, you should arrange for a visit to the GP to discuss it. It's possible to take pills, an injection that works for 3 months or even to have an implant under the skin of her forearm that works for 3 years.

Good luck

 

[SweetErika]

Also, I believe the rules on Lit state that discussion is ok about persons over 18 or 'legally adult in their country of residence.'

No, no they don't. They say:

2. You may not post sexually explicit pictures or stories featuring anyone under 18 years old. Literotica does not allow the posting of underage or animal sex pictures - or links to such - on the forum. Please Click Here for our full photo posting guidelines.​

Silicone based lube and things like baby oil can dissolve condoms and make them ineffective.

Silicone lube is perfectly safe to use with latex and non-latex condoms. We've been using silicone lube with condoms and rubber toys for years.

It's only lubes containing oils (plant-based, like olive oil, or chemical/petroleum-based, like mineral/baby oil and vaseline) that destroys latex.

While some people use KY jelly with okay results, I'd suggest a real sexual/intimate lube that's actually formulated for repeated insertion or stroking. Lubes that don't contain glycerin, alcohol, chemical preservatives, spermicide and other junk tend to be the most pussy-friendly and longer lasting, but they're also usually more expensive.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

No, no they don't. They say:

2. You may not post sexually explicit pictures or stories featuring anyone under 18 years old. Literotica does not allow the posting of underage or animal sex pictures - or links to such - on the forum. Please Click Here for our full photo posting guidelines.​

Silicone lube is perfectly safe to use with latex and non-latex condoms. We've been using silicone lube with condoms and rubber toys for years.

It's only lubes containing oils (plant-based, like olive oil, or chemical/petroleum-based, like mineral/baby oil and vaseline) that destroys latex.

While some people use KY jelly with okay results, I'd suggest a real sexual/intimate lube that's actually formulated for repeated insertion or stroking. Lubes that don't contain glycerin, alcohol, chemical preservatives, spermicide and other junk tend to be the most pussy-friendly and longer lasting, but they're also usually more expensive.

Ok, I sit corrected. Thankyou for the clarification. I must have seen the 'legally adult' wording on another site.

Thanks also for the info on lube. Seems I've been labouring under a misapprehension.

 

[WCHSP]

Whenever dealing with a woman who isn't in the habit of masturbating (however old she is), I've found the best way is to buy her a vibrator, use it on her once, and then just encourage her to experiment with it when you're not around.

Unless she can give herself an orgasm, there's no way you're going to be able to.

 

[jtf71961]

Whenever dealing with a woman who isn't in the habit of masturbating (however old she is), I've found the best way is to buy her a vibrator, use it on her once, and then just encourage her to experiment with it when you're not around.

Unless she can give herself an orgasm, there's no way you're going to be able to.

The viberator usually helps to get her started

 

[In Anticipation]

It can take a while for a woman to become orgasmic. Or so I've been told. It's important for her (and you) not to become frustrated by it. I would imagine that a good thing would be for her to explore her own body in her own time.

I'm in the UK so the whole thing is legal, it creeps me out a bit still because 16 year olds do seem like kids to me, but there you go . . .

 

[HelveticaBold]

well where I come from ...no pun intended at all...lol.... the 16 year olds are NOTHING like children at all!
In fact the 14 year olds look pretty alluring. Well, some of them. Lol!
I lost my virginity when I was 15...which was illegal then in my country too, but in fact no-one knew of it except me, my boyfriend and about a couple of dozen girl-friends!
So I wish you and your girlfriend well. Take the best of the advice offered here and start your life long learning curve.
You will have noticed we are still asking questions, seeking advice even at an advanced age like myself. Lol!