Litiquette3

[SomeoneFamiliar]

Kind with a side of abrupt.

Sometimes I just don't have the patience to play around and I'll be direct which is probably construed as rude. Mostly I just want you to say whatever it is you want so I can get on with either the conversation or my day. But abruptness can be tempered with a smile, thus the smilies.

 

[Lord Pmann]

My first inclination is to be nice to a stranger unless they give me reason to not be. Maybe they have on a Nickelback shirt or they're playing Sam Hunt's music. Then they're fair game for ridicule. It would be a crime if I didn't.

I live in the south and here people are kind by default. They are polite, open up doors, say sir and ma'am, etc. Then I go to a place like New York City and it is as if those motherfuckers have been raised by rabid hyenas. No manners. They don't look you in the eyes on the street. They don't say excuse me. They are just massive dickwads. So I do not understand why people are so rude. I mean, I don't immediately want a handjob from some stranger. I don't expect that. But it's nice to know the possibility exists.

 

[Endless_Night]

< I live in the south and here people are kind by default. They are polite, open up doors, say sir and ma'am, etc. Then I go to a place like New York City and it is as if those motherfuckers have been raised by rabid hyenas. No manners. They don't look you in the eyes on the street. They don't say excuse me. They are just massive dickwads. So I do not understand why people are so rude. I mean, I don't immediately want a handjob from some stranger. I don't expect that. But it's nice to know the possibility exists. >

Okay. I laughed.

* * *

And I'm with you on New York. Not only all the above, but they searched me in the airport. There is nothing quite like being patted down (yeah, that means what you think) in a small room by two large, unfriendly woman.

Apparently one of my passport stamps (Amsterdam) combined with my then age was a profile regularly checked for drug smuggling. I kid you not. What a day to not be wearing panties.

 

[DarkSimian]

Okay. I laughed.

* * *

And I'm with you on New York. Not only all the above, but they searched me in the airport. There is nothing quite like being patted down (yeah, that means what you think) in a small room by two large, unfriendly woman.

Apparently one of my passport stamps (Amsterdam) combined with my then age was a profile regularly checked for drug smuggling. I kid you not. What a day to not be wearing panties.

why am I suddenly jealous of the TSA?

 

[Endless_Night]

why am I suddenly jealous of the TSA?

Hahahaha!

Honestly, the two woman did not look like they enjoyed it any more than I. The one guarding the door (because where am I going to go ) had a permanent snarl. And the one who patted me down appeared horrified when I announced I was not wearing underwear. She even questioned me about the decision.

Seriously, because if I'd known I was going to get searched wouldn't I have...had more on?

Not one of my best memories.

 

[DarkSimian]

Hahahaha!

Honestly, the two woman did not look like they enjoyed it any more than I. The one guarding the door (because where am I going to go ) had a permanent snarl. And the one who patted me down appeared horrified when I announced I was not wearing underwear. She even questioned me about the decision.

Seriously, because if I'd known I was going to get searched wouldn't I have...had more on?

Not one of my best memories.

if need be, I can pre-screen you with a pat down before you go to the airport

 

[Endless_Night]

if need be, I can pre-screen you with a pat down before you go to the airport

Such an altruist.

 

[DarkSimian]

Such an altruist.

I am here to serve....

 

[Endless_Night]

I am here to serve....

Really? I rather thought you were here to suffer.

 

[DarkSimian]

Really? I rather thought you were here to suffer.

that too

 

[ChainedUp]

Choices. When given a choice, any choice, what is the first thing that guides your decision? Do you immediately consider why's best for you? Are you swayed by a sense of right vs wrong? Do you consider the greater good? Or do you simply react, allowing your instincts to guide you?

 

[FelicityJohns]

Choices. When given a choice, any choice, what is the first thing that guides your decision? Do you immediately consider why's best for you? Are you swayed by a sense of right vs wrong? Do you consider the greater good? Or do you simply react, allowing your instincts to guide you?

I'm a chronic over-thinker. My first thought is how it affects me. My second is how/if it affects anyone I care about, and any repercussions therein. Then I wonder if my original deduction on how it affects me was correct, and it really IS the wisest choice. Then I check the weather forecast to see how that plays in. Must look at world events to ascertain if my decision will impact/be impacted by anything coming down that particular pike.

By this time, the moment has passed, and we move on to the next choice.

 

[SomeoneFamiliar]

My first inclination is to be nice to a stranger unless they give me reason to not be. Maybe they have on a Nickelback shirt or they're playing Sam Hunt's music. Then they're fair game for ridicule. It would be a crime if I didn't.

I live in the south and here people are kind by default. They are polite, open up doors, say sir and ma'am, etc. Then I go to a place like New York City and it is as if those motherfuckers have been raised by rabid hyenas. No manners. They don't look you in the eyes on the street. They don't say excuse me. They are just massive dickwads. So I do not understand why people are so rude. I mean, I don't immediately want a handjob from some stranger. I don't expect that. But it's nice to know the possibility exists.

*snicker*
yes. Though I don't think I want even the possibility of a handjob either...

Choices. When given a choice, any choice, what is the first thing that guides your decision? Do you immediately consider why's best for you? Are you swayed by a sense of right vs wrong? Do you consider the greater good? Or do you simply react, allowing your instincts to guide you?

In my past I've always been pretty impulsive. Whatever feels good at the time worked for me. Not so much anymore. I think I'm more reserved and think about consequences of my actions, but not just for me, for the other people involved. Damn moral compass.

 

[SomeoneFamiliar]

I'm a chronic over-thinker. My first thought is how it affects me. My second is how/if it affects anyone I care about, and any repercussions therein. Then I wonder if my original deduction on how it affects me was correct, and it really IS the wisest choice. Then I check the weather forecast to see how that plays in. Must look at world events to ascertain if my decision will impact/be impacted by anything coming down that particular pike.

By this time, the moment has passed, and we move on to the next choice.

I love this. It's so accurate, too. It's easy to get sucked into the decision making and forget to make the decision.

 

[RacyRedLips]

....Not too whimsical, heads not deep in our own asses.

Speak for yourself.

I live in the south and here people are kind by default. They are polite, open up doors, say sir and ma'am, etc. Then I go to a place like New York City and it is as if those motherfuckers have been raised by rabid hyenas. No manners. They don't look you in the eyes on the street. They don't say excuse me. They are just massive dickwads. So I do not understand why people are so rude. I mean, I don't immediately want a handjob from some stranger. I don't expect that. But it's nice to know the possibility exists.

LMAO. This made me laugh. Tis true and not just an over-imaginative assessment. New York City is a jungle, and although I know and have met many wonderful people from there, it's not some place I visit without my bitch boots on.

Indeed... peace and love, peace and love.

I am kind, gentle, allowing, and forgiving. It's my nature. It is those times when I feel I have no choice but to be abrupt, or direct, more assertive, or God forbid, I choose to be unkind, that hurt me and cause me pain. I don't like the way it feels. And because I don't like the personal consequences of that choice, I try very hard not to do it.

Well, I guess what I mean is, it takes a concerted effort for me to be unkind, and when I've made that choice, I don't like the way it feels. It is much easier for me to be kind than unkind.

Your posts make me want to be a better woman.

Choices. When given a choice, any choice, what is the first thing that guides your decision? Do you immediately consider why's best for you? Are you swayed by a sense of right vs wrong? Do you consider the greater good? Or do you simply react, allowing your instincts to guide you?

Most times, I simply react. Not sure I would say it's my actual instincts that always guide me, however. Right/wrong and what's best for me comes later, when I have a few minutes to over-think things to death.

Other times, I refer to the sages at COSMO. Those wise ass fuckers never let me down.

 

[SomeoneFamiliar]

Other times, I refer to the sages at COSMO. Those wise ass fuckers never let me down.[/QUOTE]

Lol!

 

[DarkSimian]

A wise Vulcan philosopher once taught me "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one." And so, I have based so many of my decisions not on what was best for me, but best for everyone else. This has often been to my detriment, and it has hurt me that these choice have not always been recognized. Recently, I did do something selfish. And as those that know, it blew up in my face royally. So now I am back to my old methods, choosing other before myself, and trying to weather the storms that usually follow.

 

[ChainedUp]

Why does Spock get all the credit for stealing Jeremy Bentham's original concept. Heck, I'd even accept a reference toward John Stuart Mills.

 

[DarkSimian]

Why does Spock get all the credit for stealing Jeremy Bentham's original concept. Heck, I'd even accept a reference toward John Stuart Mills.

I got it from ST II:TWOK
I was 12, go figure....

 

[All_4_Love]

Your posts make me want to be a better woman.

My gosh, I just saw this and turned red. I am humbled. Thank you, RRL.

 

[All_4_Love]

Growing up with a father who was oftentimes very strict with his own set of values and morals, I have a very deep sense of right and wrong. There wasn't a very big margin for error in this regard. My mother was certainly my soft place to fall.

I have always made most choices, big and small, based on my feelings and what felt good to me. Sometimes, this was what I wanted without any thought on how it affected others. In retrospect, if these choices caused hurt to others, this caused a great deal of guilt.

In the small, everyday insignificant things, I still follow my heart because I believe in that. Without any thought, I just go with what feels good. I let my feelings and intuition guide me.

In the more significant choices, the thing that has changed now is that I have learned that if I check my motives, become clear on my intent, as long as my choices are selfless instead of selfish, then I can't go wrong and will always be right.

However, there is something else I've had to get clear on through the years, which is that there is no such thing as good or bad choices, only lessons. This has made it much easier to soften the line between right and wrong. It's a process that I have to keep working on.

So, in many ways I am grateful for this from my childhood, as I believe it served me well in my youth; however, perhaps not so much into adulthood, as it gave me a very overactive conscience and a guilt complex. Always wanting to follow my heart but avoiding it if means hurting others, being true to myself but still staying true to others. It's not always easy, so the choice now for me is whether it is other centered. If it's other centered then it's the right choice because that is who I want to be, so I'm still staying true to myself even if it feels like I'm not sometimes. Kind of a paradox, it seems. Much of life is just that.

 

[DarkSimian]

Growing up with a father who was oftentimes very strict with his own set of values and morals, I have a very deep sense of right and wrong. There wasn't a very big margin for error in this regard. My mother was certainly my soft place to fall.

I have always made most choices, big and small, based on my feelings and what felt good to me. Sometimes, this was what I wanted without any thought on how it affected others. In retrospect, if these choices caused hurt to others, this caused a great deal of guilt.

In the small, everyday insignificant things, I still follow my heart because I believe in that. Without any thought, I just go with what feels good. I let my feelings and intuition guide me.

In the more significant choices, the thing that has changed now is that I have learned that if I check my motives, become clear on my intent, as long as my choices are selfless instead of selfish, then I can't go wrong and will always be right.

However, there is something else I've had to get clear on through the years, which is that there is no such thing as good or bad choices, only lessons. This has made it much easier to soften the line between right and wrong. It's a process that I have to keep working on.

So, in many ways I am grateful for this from my childhood, as I believe it served me well in my youth; however, perhaps not so much into adulthood, as it gave me a very overactive conscience and a guilt complex. Always wanting to follow my heart but avoiding it if means hurting others, being true to myself but still staying true to others. It's not always easy, so the choice now for me is whether it is other centered. If it's other centered then it's the right choice because that is who I want to be, so I'm still staying true to myself even if it feels like I'm not sometimes. Kind of a paradox, it seems. Much of life is just that.

well said

 

[italiansexylady]

Choices. When given a choice, any choice, what is the first thing that guides your decision? Do you immediately consider why's best for you? Are you swayed by a sense of right vs wrong? Do you consider the greater good? Or do you simply react, allowing your instincts to guide you?

I think about what is best for me and the people I care about. I very rarely just react without thinking..........
.....ok well maybe sometimes when I'm driving...but living here in the Midwest is taming me. Heehee

 

[FelicityJohns]

So, in many ways I am grateful for this from my childhood, as I believe it served me well in my youth; however, perhaps not so much into adulthood, as it gave me a very overactive conscience and a guilt complex. Always wanting to follow my heart but avoiding it if means hurting others, being true to myself but still staying true to others. It's not always easy, so the choice now for me is whether it is other centered. If it's other centered then it's the right choice because that is who I want to be, so I'm still staying true to myself even if it feels like I'm not sometimes. Kind of a paradox, it seems. Much of life is just that.

I identify with this deeply. Every word. I had a similar upbringing. There are ways that I sometimes wonder if it broke me beyond repair; at the same time I can back it up and say the person I am has good traits. I would be someone different without those life-experiences. Would she be better or worse? Probably some of both.

But the paradox. Oh my God, yes.

Thanks for sharing yourself. You've helped at least one person by doing so.

 

[All_4_Love]

I identify with this deeply. Every word. I had a similar upbringing. There are ways that I sometimes wonder if it broke me beyond repair; at the same time I can back it up and say the person I am has good traits. I would be someone different without those life-experiences. Would she be better or worse? Probably some of both.

But the paradox. Oh my God, yes.

Thanks for sharing yourself. You've helped at least one person by doing so.

Xoxoxo

There was always a balance. And that balance is probably what saved me from being broken. My father was not an easy man to live with and I never ever wanted to disappoint him, and to this day, that is still very true. My mother was that graceful, gentle, loving, and forgiving presence.

I respect them both immensely. They made me the woman that I am today, for better or for worse. I am truly grateful for everything that they are and were. I was blessed.