Leaving my usual corner

[morninggirl5]

Most of you know that i had someone in my life that i cared about a great deal. Recently, i've come to the realization that he’s not capable or doesn’t want to be what i want and need. After six weeks of upheaval and change that i had no control over, it’s time for me to direct the changes.

So, i’m officially looking for someone. I’m not patiently waiting anymore. There are probably gonna be a lot of disappointments along the way, but i’ve committed myself to continuing. I’ve e-mailed the moderator of the group that holds a munch here and posted an ad on my profile at bondage.com.

Wish me luck. Without the support of all of you here, especially cym, i wouldn’t have had the courage to do this. It’s wildly scary at the same time it’s exhilarating. The best description i have is that it feels like there’s a part of me completely naked on display in the middle of a room.

 

[cymbidia]

mg, you're standing in a new-to-you place, and you're one who craves the constancy and comfort of the familiar. It's going to be uncomfy for a while. From discomfort, though, can come great good. The new can bring with it choices and experiences that familiar surroundings might not offer.

I applaud your decision to seek actively for new experiences and toward new people with whom you might form new bonds of friendship or more. Should you want any advice or support or consolation from any of us here, you know we'll always always always be here for you.

You're way outside your comfort zone on this, darlin', and it's brave of you to be there. Good things are just around the corner for you, i know it.

b.

 

[SierraMoon]

Congrats to you mg5... it's a scary place out there, i've been actively looking for the past 5 months.... i found my Dom at bondage.com, and i'm so happy with him, and the way he makes me feel...there is someone absolutely wonderful out there, waiting for you, i just know it.. may take some time, but it will come!! Please, know that we are here for you to lean on, and share your trials and tribulations....
take care of yourself!!

 

[Shadowsdream]

MG

Starting over can be a daunting mass of emotions that will ebb and flow from ecstasy to disallusionment. you may feel panic stricten or giddy, guilty, depressed, overwhelmed, fearful or just plain relieved to be back on the road to your needed reality. It is likely you will go through all of these emotions and more as you put your foot back on the bottom rung of your hopes and dreams.

Congratulations on your inner courage..which allows you to hold your head high and move in the direction of your destiny. Never give up your dream...magic comes at you from directions you often don't expect.

Settling for even 75% of what you need can burn a hole in your heart and your intellect long before it is noticed in your sexual core. Good luck on this new journey.

 

[WillowPuss]

Good luck mg5 ... I wish you all the best in your quest.

(I love your new AV, BTW)

 

[MotorCitySam]

Best of luck to you, MorningGirl.

 

[CarolineOh]

When I got divorced i felt like everything was over for me, that I had taken my chance on love and lost.
Boy, was I wrong. I am happier now then I have ever been, and I am not at all shy about saying that I am heads over heels in love with my wonderful Sam.
You have so much to offer, MG, you will find someone just right for you, I am sure of it. I'll wish you luck, but I don't think you'll need it

 

[cymbidia]

Ahem.
Public service announcement here:
mg5 hasn't disappeared but did have a sudden and unexpected family emergency with which to deal (are there any other kind?) and had to go rusing off. She'll be back when, well, she gets back.

 

[Guest]

Taking care of you is the best gift you could give yourself. You're ready.
Good luck!

 

[WillowPuss]

Ahem.
Public service announcement here:
mg5 hasn't disappeared but did have a sudden and unexpected family emergency with which to deal (are there any other kind?) and had to go rusing off. She'll be back when, well, she gets back.

Ohhh gosh - hope everything turns out OK.
If you are in contact with her cym, please pass on my love and best vibes ... I mean wishes. (Just realised that could be taken two ways there!)

 

[MotorCitySam]

I too hope all is well, and if you are in touch with her, please let her know we are all concerned.

 

[Guest]

 

[morninggirl5]

Thanks to all of you for your wishes. I managed a moment to peek in, you all have been very busy the past week. I don't know when I'll be back for good at this point. I am managing to check e-mail occasionally.


mg

 

[CarolineOh]

Not to worry, dear, we will be here whenever you can come by.

 

[morninggirl5]

I'm back for real, now. No more peeking in as i look over my shoulder to see who else might be looking at the screen.

Thank you for all your concern. The past few weeks were probably the worst i've ever had to go through. I sat and held my uncle's hand for a week, waiting for him to leave me. He was a father to me from the time i was born until the moment he died.

He made us promise him we wouldn't "stand over him and blubber" that we'd rejoice in his passing. I don't think the tears i shed reached the blubbering stage, at least the two i trusted with my tears didn't run away screaming.

The journey that started this thread will continue. Uncle Sam would have been probably the only family member to understand this part of me. He'd be telling me to "Go home, live your life." It's all i can do for him now.

 

[SierraMoon]

it's good to have you back again, mg.... you have been missed. i hope that things start looking up for you very soon.. it's very hard to lose a loved one, but we are all here for you to lean on, if you need us.... take care of yourself!!

 

[Shadowsdream]

welcome back mg

Live in the future for your Uncle Sam with every fibre of your being and joy.

 

[cymbidia]

Welcome back, darlin' one.

Take the time you need to realign yourself with the way your life feels now, with the absence of such a wonderful man from the center of your life - and then slowly, slowly, begin to look at the place you you were when you left. Slowly decide if it's the place you want to resume. Then resume it or find a new place from which to being.

But begin, my friend. You owe it yourself and to the memory of the man who was your father in the finest sense of the word to live your life in a way that will embrace all it can offer to you.

You already know that but sometimes it's good to hear the things we already know from outside ourselves, too.

 

[WillowPuss]

I just want to echo the above three posts ... welcome home.

I hope you find yourself again soon. Just remember you have a whole family here to help and cheer you every step of the way.

(((hugs)))

 

[Skally]

You're on a wonderful journey and you'll probably feel yourself on unfamiliar ground - remember to touch base here if you ever need us.

Good luck in your searching, and I'm sorry to hear about your loss.

 

[CarolineOh]

Since my Dad died, there hasn't been a day that I didn't think of him. At first, each memory, every thought, was painful, but with time comes acceptance, and now, I will see something that I know would make him laugh, and I smile, or I will read that the Tigers lost again, and I mutter a curse at them for him, and he lives in my heart, not in pain, but in the fullness of his life. That's the way it is meant to be, and the way it will become for you. Be strong, dear girl, and take his advice to heart. Live for him, in the way he would want you to live.