Ladies, I need your advice, please.

Your1Guy

Literotica Guru
Joined
Feb 21, 2006
Posts
584
In 2004, I was fortunate enough to meet up with a beautiful young woman from Sweden who was in Sydney recovering from a broken romance.
Ann met an Australian guy on Match.com while she was still living in Sweden. They had an online romance for several months before he went over to Sweden to meet her. They spent a few idyllic weeks together in Europe and he convinced her to come back to Australia with him, which she agreed to. After quitting her job and getting her children to look after her apartment, she moved to Brisbane to join him. Apparently the romance lasted about a week, then he showed his true colours. He started off by belittling her in front of his clients & friends before progressing to trying to run every aspect of her life. The end came when she was 20 minutes late (due to peak hour traffic) for a dinner party with his clients. He started yelling abuse at her in the restaurant, slapped her face in front of everyone present and finished by breaking her nose, with his fist, in the carpark.
She packed her belongings that night & came down to Sydney.
She rang her daughter in Goteborg (Sweden) and asked for the address of her daughters' girlfriend who lives in Sydney. She now had a temporary place to stay. Ann got some part time work in a company that rented out luxury apartments in the Eastern suburbs and was happy doing that while she was trying to sort out her life.
One of the women that she had organized an apartment for was a German girl, called Andrea. These 2 women got on like a house on fire. Ann wasn't interested in another romance after the last disaster, and Andrea is devoted to her career as a P.A. to a company director, and also wasn't interested in romance. I met the 2 women in the NSW Leagues Club during lunch one day and we all began to enjoy a very close, non-sexual, friendship.
We would go everywhere together. They would organize dinners, concerts, drinks, parties or whatever and just tell me when & where I had to meet them. It was great! There were no petty jealousies or arguments, just 3 friends who got on famously.
Unfortunately Andrea was transferred back to Germany in December 2005 as the company headquarters closed here.
Then in January 2006, Anns' mother informed her that her father had just passed away. So, sadly, Ann left for Sweden on the 24th of January to help her mum with the funeral arrangements & to be with her children.
We kept in touch with each other on MSN Messenger, and we would usually chat about 4 to 5 times each week. After a few weeks of this, we realised that our feelings had grown to more than friendship for each other and Ann decided that we would get together in Sydney after the European summer.
On the 25th of April, we were chatting on Messenger and Anns' son came home to her apartment at about 11:00pm, which wasn't unusual as he lives there with her. Ann got Christian to say hello, as we were using web video, and she was having fun translating for us because Christian doesn't speak English and I don't speak Swedish. we talked for a little while then Christian went to bed. Ann & I talked for about 20 minutes longer, then we lost the connection,which happened occasionally. That was the last I heard from her.
Over the next 5 weeks, I sent emails, letters & text messages that all went unanswered. I tried phoning her mobile & only got a recorded message in Swedish, which I later found out was saying that this service is unavailable.
On the 31st May, I received a phone call from her daughter in response to all of my emails. Therese advised me that her mothers' car was found in a railway carpark not far from her apartment. The car was unlocked, her wallet & cash was on the floor on the passengers' side & her mobile phone was in the glove compartment. They later found her passport in a drawer in her apartment. The police are treating it as suspicious, but have nothing to go on. There was no sign of a struggle in the car & her son didn't hear her leave the apartment after he went to bed.
How do you cope with something like this? I have no idea what's actually happened to Ann. I don't believe that she just ran away. She left behind her money, bank book, credit cards, passport, mobile phone & her car. Not to mention the car keys & her house keys. She has just vanished into thin air. Interpol & the Swedish police have not been able to find any witnesses who saw her drive into the carpark or leave it. None of her accounts have been accessed since she left.
I just feel really empty inside not knowing what's going on. How do you ladies work through something like this? The not knowing. The feeling of loss with nothing to show for it. I go through each day with a sense of dread and my emotions have been put on hold.
Ann was actually the person who put me onto this site before she left because she was worried about me being alone. Now what good is it?
Any suggestions or advice would be welcomed as I've run out of ideas.
 
I so wish that I can say something to help.... your experience is making mine pale in comparision(a Lit friend missing for 3 weeks) . To me it sounds like you have done all that you can to find out what has happened to her. I really hope that news comes through really soon :rose: :rose:
 
Wow.Im just new in LIT also but been lurking around and checking posts for quite sometime and just decided to join in,I wish I can say something but like what the above poster said,hope you one day you'll hear or find out what really happened.I know it's hard but it won't help anyhow if you will just dread yourself out,go on with the flow of real life,keep yourself busy,so somehow it will ease the pain you having right now. Good Luck. :)
 
I'll start by saying how genuinely sorry I am for you that you have had to cope wit this situation alone and with no information. I cannot imagine how that must be.

*HUG* Is in order here <--(",)-->

I hope that you can stay in contact with Therese and eventually learn what happened to Ann. I know this is probably my innate paranoia gone mad but has anyone tried to find out where this Australian guy was when she disappeared? It's highly unlikely that he followed her all the way to Europe, but not impossible.

Keep talking, Your1guy. Bottling something like this in your head would slowly destroy you.

Hold on to your memories of Ann. We never die to those who remember us fondly.

I wish you all the very best.

Velvet :kiss:
 
I really haven't done anything, for obvious reasons ( language & distance). Everything that is being done has been organised by her family in Sweden.


rozweb said:
I so wish that I can say something to help.... your experience is making mine pale in comparision(a Lit friend missing for 3 weeks) . To me it sounds like you have done all that you can to find out what has happened to her. I really hope that news comes through really soon :rose: :rose:
 
Thank you

iminlovenlust said:
Wow.Im just new in LIT also but been lurking around and checking posts for quite sometime and just decided to join in,I wish I can say something but like what the above poster said,hope you one day you'll hear or find out what really happened.I know it's hard but it won't help anyhow if you will just dread yourself out,go on with the flow of real life,keep yourself busy,so somehow it will ease the pain you having right now. Good Luck. :)
 
The guy in Brisbane started a 9 year jail sentence in November 2005. He's lucky we don't have the death penalty here.

VelvetDarkness said:
I'll start by saying how genuinely sorry I am for you that you have had to cope wit this situation alone and with no information. I cannot imagine how that must be.

*HUG* Is in order here <--(",)-->

I hope that you can stay in contact with Therese and eventually learn what happened to Ann. I know this is probably my innate paranoia gone mad but has anyone tried to find out where this Australian guy was when she disappeared? It's highly unlikely that he followed her all the way to Europe, but not impossible.

Keep talking, Your1guy. Bottling something like this in your head would slowly destroy you.

Hold on to your memories of Ann. We never die to those who remember us fondly.

I wish you all the very best.

Velvet :kiss:
 
My prayers and thoughts are with you. Coping over a loss or a disappearance is hard. The not knowing I think is harder, because there is always the "what if" factor. There are also no easy answers. You have to take it one day at a time, one hour at a time and then move on from there. I hope you find the answers. I hope her family does too. :kiss: :rose: *hugs* ~ Red
 
Your1Guy said:
On the 31st May, I received a phone call from her daughter in response to all of my emails. Therese advised me that her mothers' car was found in a railway carpark not far from her apartment. The car was unlocked, her wallet & cash was on the floor on the passengers' side & her mobile phone was in the glove compartment. They later found her passport in a drawer in her apartment. The police are treating it as suspicious, but have nothing to go on. There was no sign of a struggle in the car & her son didn't hear her leave the apartment after he went to bed.
How do you cope with something like this? I have no idea what's actually happened to Ann. I don't believe that she just ran away. She left behind her money, bank book, credit cards, passport, mobile phone & her car. Not to mention the car keys & her house keys. She has just vanished into thin air. Interpol & the Swedish police have not been able to find any witnesses who saw her drive into the carpark or leave it. None of her accounts have been accessed since she left.
I just feel really empty inside not knowing what's going on. How do you ladies work through something like this? The not knowing. The feeling of loss with nothing to show for it. I go through each day with a sense of dread and my emotions have been put on hold.
Ann was actually the person who put me onto this site before she left because she was worried about me being alone. Now what good is it?
Any suggestions or advice would be welcomed as I've run out of ideas.
I don't mean to sound like a killjoy, Your1Guy, but did you check out this story yourself? More times that not, this online problem happens and if someone is diligent enough to check further, most times it is a hoax. I pray this is not what has happened to you. Please contact authorities in Sweden either through a web site or simply call them, to verify this. Regardless, it will give you peace of mind one way or the other.

IMHO
 
I have a cousin who is with the Australian Federal Police in Canberra. It was he who initially contacted Interpol & the Swedish police after I received the phone call from Anns' daughter advising me of her mothers' disappearance.
I have also been interviewed by representatives of the Swedish consulate & embassy in Australia & by 2 Interpol officers who came to Sydney from New Zealand on their way back to Europe.
So I guess you can say that I have checked out the facts & also that the various authorities involved in the investigation are taking it very seriously.




Jail said:
I don't mean to sound like a killjoy, Your1Guy, but did you check out this story yourself? More times that not, this online problem happens and if someone is diligent enough to check further, most times it is a hoax. I pray this is not what has happened to you. Please contact authorities in Sweden either through a web site or simply call them, to verify this. Regardless, it will give you peace of mind one way or the other.

IMHO
 
I am not only concerned for the disappearance of a wonderful friend but also for some closure for her mother who lost a husband in January then a daughter a few months later. My other concern is with Anns' son & daughter who have lost a mother & a mentor. So many people have felt the pain of this strange situation.


RedHairedandFriendly said:
My prayers and thoughts are with you. Coping over a loss or a disappearance is hard. The not knowing I think is harder, because there is always the "what if" factor. There are also no easy answers. You have to take it one day at a time, one hour at a time and then move on from there. I hope you find the answers. I hope her family does too. :kiss: :rose: *hugs* ~ Red
 
1Guy, I don't know what to say, but I have been through something similar myself, so I do understand the worry and feeling of helplessness that you're experiencing.

All you can do is wait, as I did, and pray.

If you need to chat with someone that's been there, please call on me.
 
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