Kinks We Don't Understand: DD/lg (First in a series)

[Lord Pmann]

I'm with Pmann in no matter how much it is explained, I don't think I'll understand the difference with D/s vs the Littles. If it doesn't deal with age play, I don't see a difference, and I'm reading, and trying really hard to understand.

Quoting for posterity.

 

[Moochienanu]

This is my big concern too.

Okay... some follow up questions and comments.

1. Is it typical for a daddy and his lg (*shiver*) to be exclusive? It seems odd that you’d have multiple partners in this scenario.

I am an odd duck (if you haven’t already heard the quack, you will after I’m done answering these questions), my husband/married partner is not my Daddy. For a long time, my husband and I tried kink in the bedroom together, but he is just not built for a long-term Dominant role and I’m just such a sub it’s bonkers. That’s when we decided we needed to do something in order to stay happy with what we do share. We have an open marriage (are ethically non-monogamous) and so I have Daddy to fulfill my need for a Dominant (and obviously be in a relationship with outside of sex as well). I have only one Daddy. I have only one relationship (Daddy) right now outside of my marriage. (Quack quack)

2. I have a theory as to why the daddies don’t show their faces or comment. This is not directed at Moochie. I’m sure her daddy is just lovely. But the other lgs’ daddies. I suspect they’ve got lots of LGs on their lines and if they post, it’s gonna get confusing, like a Maury Povich paternity test show.

Yes. Sadly, I do think you’re right about some of the Daddies. Just like other Dommy-wannabes, they (Daddies) are not without their sub-collectors.

As far as my wonderful Daddy, I wouldn’t expect Him to even post here let alone in my own ampic thread... He isn’t on lit for that attention and never was. I leave clues in my ampic thread sometimes, but other than that we are privately together here on lit for His anonymity because I’m such a spectacle.

3. Not one little has mentioned that part of the kink is taboo. Come on. Part of the appeal of every kink is the taboo nature. Why has not one person admitted this?

I guess the Dominant/submissive part of this kink is taboo? I usually reserve “taboo” as a label to describe incest here on lit because that’s usually how I see it used in personals. This one I’m honestly unsure about.

4. I think I won’t get the distinction of age play versus little. It’s been explained several times and it’s like the same thing to my eyes when I read it.

You might not get it. I’ll try one more time kinda simple like, k?

Age play = some littles do this where they act needier/more vulnerable/in a place mentally that is younger than their normal (think “I need to put on a onesie and dance to Britney’s Baby One More Time while mouthing the words into my hairbrush). Once again, for me and many other littles, age play is NOT sexual. I do not role play a child (*shiver*) or daughter (*double shiver*) when I fuck.

A little = not always in that place mentally where they age play, but are a submissive who is more playful, sometimes brattier, youthful in spirit and seeks a Dominant who tends to fall into a more nurturing, supportive role in their lives.

5. Why are so few littles able to talk about this without getting defensive?

From what I understand, there has been some name calling, there have been a lot of misunderstandings, and there have been some downright disgusting, pedophilic comments recently surrounding the “little community.” It is pretty difficult to try and explain yourself over and over, and I can understand how anyone facing some of this onslaught seemingly “alone” would turn defensive/ feel like a victim.

I also get the other side of the coin: CHILD ABUSE IS IMMORAL and ABHORRENT. Anyone who wants to find a roleplay partner who is willing to pretend to be underage is wrong as well. And the people who turn their blind eyes to this behavior should be called out for enabling. - But again, this pedophile behavior shouldn’t be associated with DD/lg IMHO because it isn’t a part of the kink.

So, basically the littles are probably just tired of saying the same things time and again and not feeling listened to... which will lead anyone to get defensive after a while, I think.

6. Last one... everyone keeps saying the DD/lg thing is not sexual at all- likely in an effort to avoid the appearance of pretending to fuck inappropriately. And they get mad when we ask why and they assure us that it’s not sexual and they’re not pretending to be underage when they have sex. That would all be easier to swallow (as the actress said to the bishop), IF THIS WAS NOT A SEX SITE. I feel like if they’d just admit, “yeah, we play like we are younger when we fuck” (for purposes of legalities, I mean 18). Why won’t people just admit they’re doing that? We all know that’s what you’re doing. Just someone say it, for fuck’s sake.

I am a fucking sex goddess. Well... I mean, Daddy says I’m fucking sexy, and I believe Him, so...

I am not roleplaying any age when I have sex. Age play is the furthest thing from my mind from the moment He kisses me “hello” to when He smacks my ass and sends me on my way back home satisfied and always craving more. I fuck like a woman. I am a woman when I’m fucked.

I won’t admit to pretending to be underage when I have sex because that’s not what I do. If that’s really what everyone “knows that we’re doing,” I’m disappointed in you all who still think that about littles after all of this conversation.

 

[AlwaysFara]

Nope...You are incorrect...You should spend more time reading.

To identify as a 16 year old or younger when you are of age is age play.

 

[MaBelle3120]

This is the most common misconception about anything I’ve said. I’ve never disagreed with your right to do it. I am all for your right to fuck while sucking a pacifier or while wearing your My Little Pony tee. Is it weird (to me)? Absolutely. But lots of sex stuff is weird.

But why are people not just admitting what goes on? We all know it. It makes the discussion much harder because we have to pretend that it’s something that it’s not.

That’s not what I meant. I meant that we can’t all seem to agree on what Littles are/do.
That’s why when you say “we all know it”, some people disagree. You perceive DD/lg as one thing, others disagree.

 

[SassySheDevil]

Yeah....You are frankly ignorant. I read what you just said and my only response...You are ignorant.

I suggest you read the definition of that word before you respond

If you truly don't want to help people understand, please leave it to those who do.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Yeah....You are frankly ignorant. I read what you just said and my only response...You are ignorant.

I suggest you read the definition of that word before you respond

You are certainly well-read. I surmise this. And I’m aware of the definition of the word ignorant. However, saying such is usually the argument of those with little to say. Rather than answer, you say, “You’re ignorant” or “You don’t read” when you admittedly didn’t even read my question enough to pose a relevant response.

I’m sure you’re dripping in little bitches. So, why not give us something to read, papa?

 

[SassySheDevil]

Quoting for posterity.

haha don't let your head get too big. But you've spoken rather well for me on this subject. You are better with words.

 

[AlwaysFara]

I'm with you on this one. I remember my dad always tucking us in at night, singing us a song, kissing us and telling us that he loved us. We were expected to say that we loved him back. My mom was cold as ice and only tolerated him doing this for a few years. Then she told him to stop doing it.

I also remember being two years old and asking him what love meant. I'm the type who questions everything. My dad told me to sit down on the floor. He came back with the dictionary, sat down beside me and looked up the meaning of the word.

I remember thinking that we were both in trouble because that was the book that adults used when they didn't know something. So to me, saying, "I love you" was really rather meaningless. We were saying it only because we thought we were supposed to.

My dad had the appearance of rather charmed life up until his dad died. His dad was wealthy so he was lavished with gifts and taken on nice vacations. His mom though was a witch with a B. For some reason, she liked me but the feeling was not mutual. She was horrible to people. Always picking fights and trying to control people. Played lots of games. Things were so bad between the two of them, that if he had to go back to her city on business, he did not let her know he was coming because he didn't want to see her.

When I was growing up, I was given very mixed signals from my dad. On the one hand, I was spoiled. He bought me anything I wanted. Took me wherever I wanted. Stopped the car at the drop of the hat if I saw some wildflowers I wanted to pick. He was also very charming and talented in terms of art and music. He helped us put on a carnival for charity. We often put on plays or sang and played instruments on the weekends when I had sleepovers.

Now the bad part! Much of the time we were like oil and water. He had a volatile temper and I was his target. Yelling, screaming, hitting, choking, extreme (IMO) punishments for slight infractions.

Thankfully after I moved out, he finally noticed the problem. He got some sort of satisfaction in taking things out on me, the first born. With me gone, he had no outlet. He was in therapy for years, starting with anger management. It really worked wonders for him. He was diagnosed with additional issues that made him impulsive and not good at reading people. He was not perfect but he did try really hard to communicate better and he no longer got enraged like he used to.

I don't think most of my BFs were like him but the man I married was. I think we do seek familiarity. In my ex's case, he did yell and call names a lot. He did cause me injuries by jumping in my path suddenly, bashing into me and knocking me sideways or tripping me, all of which was considered to be accidents by the counselors we saw as well as LE. Mostly he just broke stuff or hid it or threw it away. He did a lot of gas lighting. My poor gardener found tons of stuff that he had hidden from me. He stashed in the loft of the back house where I never went. He didn't allow me back there. When we moved here, we agreed that I could have the master bedroom and he would take that building.

Thing is with my ex, before we married, it was all a facade. He did spoil me. Bought me lavish things but not the sort of things that I wanted. Like caviar. He did get me a cat. I did want the cat.

Once married, he turned into a nightmare. He had all of my dad's bad qualities but none of the good ones. My mom couldn't stand for them to be together because she said my dad would behave badly for at least a day afterwards. Weird thing is, my ex's friend's wife made the same claim. Said he was normally a sweet person but after he had been with my ex, he behaved badly. Both were in the military and both were banned from working at the same duty station at the same time because of their antics.

So in no way was my ex loving or nurturing at all after we got married. In fact when I was pregnant, the loving and nurturing one was a guy online! We did actually meet once in person. That was cool.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that we might be attracted to what we perceive as familiar, but it doesn't always work out that way.

Thanks. That’s all personal crap, Jada.

 

[MrPractical]

To identify as a 16 year old or younger when you are of age is age play.

That has never been my experience. Age play has nothing to do with a DD's/lg lifestyle

 

[AlwaysFara]

I am an odd duck (if you haven’t already heard the quack, you will after I’m done answering these questions), my husband/married partner is not my Daddy. For a long time, my husband and I tried kink in the bedroom together, but he is just not built for a long-term Dominant role and I’m just such a sub it’s bonkers. That’s when we decided we needed to do something in order to stay happy with what we do share. We have an open marriage (are ethically non-monogamous) and so I have Daddy to fulfill my need for a Dominant (and obviously be in a relationship with outside of sex as well). I have only one Daddy. I have only one relationship (Daddy) right now outside of my marriage. (Quack quack)



Yes. Sadly, I do think you’re right about some of the Daddies. Just like other Dommy-wannabes, they (Daddies) are not without their sub-collectors.

As far as my wonderful Daddy, I wouldn’t expect Him to even post here let alone in my own ampic thread... He isn’t on lit for that attention and never was. I leave clues in my ampic thread sometimes, but other than that we are privately together here on lit for His anonymity because I’m such a spectacle.



I guess the Dominant/submissive part of this kink is taboo? I usually reserve “taboo” as a label to describe incest here on lit because that’s usually how I see it used in personals. This one I’m honestly unsure about.



You might not get it. I’ll try one more time kinda simple like, k?

Age play = some littles do this where they act needier/more vulnerable/in a place mentally that is younger than their normal (think “I need to put on a onesie and dance to Britney’s Baby One More Time while mouthing the words into my hairbrush). Once again, for me and many other littles, age play is NOT sexual. I do not role play a child (*shiver*) or daughter (*double shiver*) when I fuck.

A little = not always in that place mentally where they age play, but are a submissive who is more playful, sometimes brattier, youthful in spirit and seeks a Dominant who tends to fall into a more nurturing, supportive role in their lives.



From what I understand, there has been some name calling, there have been a lot of misunderstandings, and there have been some downright disgusting, pedophilic comments recently surrounding the “little community.” It is pretty difficult to try and explain yourself over and over, and I can understand how anyone facing some of this onslaught seemingly “alone” would turn defensive/ feel like a victim.

I also get the other side of the coin: CHILD ABUSE IS IMMORAL and ABHORRENT. Anyone who wants to find a roleplay partner who is willing to pretend to be underage is wrong as well. And the people who turn their blind eyes to this behavior should be called out for enabling. - But again, this pedophile behavior shouldn’t be associated with DD/lg IMHO because it isn’t a part of the kink.

So, basically the littles are probably just tired of saying the same things time and again and not feeling listened to... which will lead anyone to get defensive after a while, I think.



I am a fucking sex goddess. Well... I mean, Daddy says I’m fucking sexy, and I believe Him, so...

I am not roleplaying any age when I have sex. Age play is the furthest thing from my mind from the moment He kisses me “hello” to when He smacks my ass and sends me on my way back home satisfied and always craving more. I fuck like a woman. I am a woman when I’m fucked.

I won’t admit to pretending to be underage when I have sex because that’s not what I do. If that’s really what everyone “knows that we’re doing,” I’m disappointed in you all who still think that about littles after all of this conversation.

Disagree with your 3. I think as a sub I have a MUCH easier time than littles do. I don’t think there is as much as a stigma, although stigmas exist for both.

 

[AlwaysFara]

That has never been my experience. Age play has nothing to do with a DD's/lg lifestyle

Then what makes a little so appealing?

 

[MrPractical]

You are certainly well-read. I surmise this. And I’m aware of the definition of the word ignorant. However, saying such is usually the argument of those with little to say. Rather than answer, you say, “You’re ignorant” or “You don’t read” when you admittedly didn’t even read my question enough to pose a relevant response.

I’m sure you’re dripping in little bitches. So, why not give us something to read, papa?

I read your question.


My point is made , Sir. Thank you.

 

[Lord Pmann]

That’s not what I meant. I meant that we can’t all seem to agree on what Littles are/do.
That’s why when you say “we all know it”, some people disagree. You perceive DD/lg as one thing, others disagree.

I think this is what we Regulars find so annoying. I said it was weird and laughed at someone for posting something silly to me. The littles came out of the woodwork with their tiny pitchforks and Dark Simian rode up on his white mule saying I don’t understand it or have any desire to.

So, we start this thread. It turns out, the littles don’t have a fucking clue either (with a few minor exceptions). The one I made fun of initially, SNG, said she had no idea there were age ranges associated with littles. Really? As someone who is ignorant, even I knew that. On top of that, they can’t express their ideas without crying or getting frustrated. Then they keep trying to use euphemisms to change what they originally said.

I like this discussion. But calling people ignorant by those who can’t explain themselves is silly.

 

[Moochienanu]

It seems that while I artfully crafted answers to questions posed from an honest, curious position, this thread has devolved into chaos and is no longer productive.

I’ll be back when/if you get it back together.

 

[AlwaysFara]

You're not helping here, darling. You are coming off as rude and condescending. We don't really need another Pmann running loose.

He’s not nearly as funny.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I read your question.


My point is made , Sir. Thank you.

Ooooh. Sir.

https://media1.tenor.com/images/60e0b286ec6af9ca647bc4345bd7c994/tenor.gif?itemid=12466131

 

[MrPractical]

You're not helping here, darling. You are coming off as rude and condescending. We don't really need another Pmann running loose.

Thank you for the advice.

 

[Lord Pmann]

It seems that while I artfully crafted answers to questions posed from an honest, curious position, this thread has devolved into chaos and is no longer productive.

I’ll be back when/if you get it back together.

It’s fine. We will ignore Papa Practical. Or either he can stop being a douche. Your input has been informative.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I won’t admit to pretending to be underage when I have sex because that’s not what I do. If that’s really what everyone “knows that we’re doing,” I’m disappointed in you all who still think that about littles after all of this conversation.

You’re the only one who articulated this in any way that is remotely believable. For those others who get frustrated about it, they should follow your example (and the other couple of people left here) on how to use words to articulate things. You explained it. Well. I still don’t get a lot of it. But your words make sense, as best they can.

 

[SassySheDevil]

It seems that while I artfully crafted answers to questions posed from an honest, curious position, this thread has devolved into chaos and is no longer productive.

I’ll be back when/if you get it back together.

You are the one who has been explaining it for those of us who don't understand. Please don't leave. Many of the others either can't, or get upset too easily. I don't participate in these kind of threads often, because so few can explain the unknown, without getting upset.

A while back. Same thing happened with Polyamory. Totally curious, but not going to ask questions, because when people did, others got upset.

LOL and Pmann beat me to it again...

 

[Lord Pmann]

LOL and Pmann beat me to it again...

And I said it better.

I’m normally not someone who asks someone not to leave a thread or whatever. But she is answering actual questions.

It’s a pretty good thread. And I can only take 50% of the credit for it. So yeah.

 

[Jada59]

Thanks. That’s all personal crap, Jada.

Yes. It is.

 

[SassySheDevil]

And I said it better.

I’m normally not someone who asks someone not to leave a thread or whatever. But she is answering actual questions.

It’s a pretty good thread. And I can only take 50% of the credit for it. So yeah.

haha yes, you did. I'm not nearly as good with words. Besides, for once you aren't being an ass

 

[Lord Pmann]

haha yes, you did. I'm not nearly as good with words. Besides, for once you aren't being an ass

Incorrect. You just agree with me this time. I’m being just like I always am. There is an indirect correlation between how much of an ass you think I am versus how much you agree with me.

This is a good thread. It’s interesting.

 

[SassySheDevil]

Incorrect. You just agree with me this time. I’m being just like I always am. There is an indirect correlation between how much of an ass you think I am versus how much you agree with me.

This is a good thread. It’s interesting.

Oh no. I have no problem admitting if I do and don't agree with you. We just don't talk. So I never really tell you.

But I agree. I am interested and almost regretting that I have to go to bed soon. Damn work for getting in the way!