Jacking-Off Log

[rosco rathbone]

Day 12

i can help with that prostate problem. Just sayin.

I'm so backed up you'd have to cordon off the area and approach my prostate wearing one of those big bomb squad suits.

Day 12. This is going to be the last day of the moratorium due to circumstances. It has been very interesting.

Over the last couple of days, I've really avoided lewd thoughts and something weird happened: my body shifted gears. Last night a whole bunch of lewd thoughts came to me and there was no body arousal at all, no tension, no boner. This is definitely the way to go for long-haul continence.

But then last night, I had my first sex dream of the moratorium. (I know this because I record all dreams every day). Of course, knowing me, it was pervy. I was staying in the house of a close friend of relative who had a nubile daughter. I had a bit of power over her for some reason, maybe a secret I was blackmailing her with. Anyhow, I kept cornering her and pushing her into walls and dry humping her from behind. In the dream I wanted to "have" her, but I was too afraid to go all the way through with it, so I settled for frottage. A weird mix of lust, furtiveness, shame, fear, and the glee of having power over another person.

This seems to have shifted the gears again, because when I woke up I felt very tense and had a stiff cock.

 

[bridgeburner]

It could be said that a Pimp is a Man of Circumstance.

Ah, frottage: near and dear to my heart. I've had some of these humping dreams myself. Perhaps strange for a girl, but who the fuck controls what they are/do in dreams other than Carlos Casteneda, anyway? Certainly not me.

 

[rosco rathbone]

It could be said that a Pimp is a Man of Circumstance.

Ah, frottage: near and dear to my heart. I've had some of these humping dreams myself. Perhaps strange for a girl, but who the fuck controls what they are/do in dreams other than Carlos Casteneda, anyway? Certainly not me.

Heh, my frottage remark was aimed @ you, beebs.

By the way, I control what I do in dreams....but I learned it from CC.

 

[Marquis]

Rosco, mind if I post your 12 day escapade on my blog?

 

[rosco rathbone]

Sure, why not.

 

[bluntforcemama]

But then last night, I had my first sex dream of the moratorium. (I know this because I record all dreams every day). Of course, knowing me, it was pervy. I was staying in the house of a close friend of relative who had a nubile daughter. I had a bit of power over her for some reason, maybe a secret I was blackmailing her with. Anyhow, I kept cornering her and pushing her into walls and dry humping her from behind. In the dream I wanted to "have" her, but I was too afraid to go all the way through with it, so I settled for frottage. A weird mix of lust, furtiveness, shame, fear, and the glee of having power over another person.

Bowdlerizing Lolita!

 

[rosco rathbone]

Bowdlerizing Lolita!

Yeah, Lolita is floating around in there for sure in the old noggin.

 

[bridgeburner]

Heh, my frottage remark was aimed @ you, beebs.

By the way, I control what I do in dreams....but I learned it from CC.

arrrgh! Well, of course you do. Picture me all smiley and waggy-tailed over the gift of frottage, though. ;->

 

[rick_j21]

Lately I have been learning just how enjoyable it can be to finger fuck my asshole while I slowly work my cock with my other hand. I like to feel 2 fingers slip in the tight hole as I enjoy my prick. Just a thought I figured I would share.

 

[LowMurmur]

arrrgh! Well, of course you do. Picture me all smiley and waggy-tailed over the gift of frottage, though. ;->

(Beats the SHIT out of those 'Pick Me Up Bouquets' . . .)

 

[MechaBlade]

I haven't jacked in the last couple of days, for time reasons to begin with, but now I don't have the urge. My last jacks were forced. I didn't feel like jacking, but I felt like it was time for me to cum, so I thought about sex and jacked.

Now all I can think about is girls, mostly one specific girl, and lying in bed with her and spending time with her. Romantic shit.

I am a girl.

 

[laelaai]

I'm starting to wonder if there are any serious long term detrimental effects on one's health due to abstaining from orgasms.... My abstinence started after a bad break up and with the exception of a week-long period a couple months ago during which I seriously could not keep my hands off of myself (like a pervy old man)...I wasn't even bothering to take my jeans or whatever off, so they would inevitably end up getting soaking wet like I had just sat down in a kiddie pool, and then I would change into clean pants and then 20 minutes later I would be at it again...even in the car while I was driving....I couldn't stop. Then after that week...I haven't been able to. I think about it, I crave it; my mind feels like it is stuck in some kind of recursive skirt-lifting-panties-ripping-off loop....but my body isn't with me on it. I'm starting to wonder if this could actually make me go insane....if the lack of orgasming for such a long period of time could have literally altered my brain's chemical makeup.

 

[bridgeburner]

(Beats the SHIT out of those 'Pick Me Up Bouquets' . . .)

Bwahahahaha!!

 

[Batch]

I haven't jacked in the last couple of days, for time reasons to begin with, but now I don't have the urge. My last jacks were forced. I didn't feel like jacking, but I felt like it was time for me to cum, so I thought about sex and jacked.

Now all I can think about is girls, mostly one specific girl, and lying in bed with her and spending time with her. Romantic shit.

I am a girl.

*snort*

 

[Marquis]

http://blog.myspace.com/lithiumeleon

 

[LadyFunkenstein]

Mental images betray me...

I no longer have porn as a distraction. All masturbation is 100% based on my own mental images, be they real or imagined.

I lay on the bed of my antisceptic-feeling hotel room, intent on quickly getting off before I faced a dull trade show. I didn't feel like being creative, so my mind went directly to my last sexual interlude as I lightly stroked between my legs.

He had one arm wrapped around my waist, holding me down, with the other fingred my clit, before plunging several fingers inside of my pussy. He roughly and relentless finger fucked me, pounding against my g-spot. I started to shake, feelings so intense for a moment I didn't know whether I would laugh or cry if I allowed myself to let go. As if reading my mind he whispered, "It's Ok " and that made me...

And suddenly my mind betrayed me, and the image shifted to the last person I was dating. Someone who seemingly fell off the face of the earth. Someone who depresses me. I tried to fight it, tried to turn off that switch in my mind, tried to bully my mind into picturing what I wanted.

I could not do it.

I dried up like a bone.

I needed to watch something neutral to allow myself to begin again, so I turned on CNN. They were airing a report about the earthquake in China. I watched it dispassionately - what's that saying? One is a tragedy, a million is a statistic? My mind quickly cleared.

I recalled my co-worker who predicted after the cyclone that there would be another huge natural disaster, a sign of the times, jesus is coming, you need to get saved.

I remembered that I am a "catholic" - one baptism, baby! We don't need tune-ups.

I thought about the priest I wanted to fuck when I was 15, the one who ran our catechism classes.

I felt myself becoming aroused yet again, but when I tried, I just wasn't feeling it. I gave up and went to the trade show.

 

[bisexplicit]

Yet, still, I masturbated.

Prequel: Yesterday, I attended a fundraiser for an organization that advocates for survivors of domestic abuse and sexual assualt. And, during that event, I cried over the horror stories that some of the survivors shared.



It was "nonconsensual." I knew that going in. I wanted something a little bit harsh, a little bit rough; I was feeling desperate to cum and get it over with, and I knew that imagining myself as a woman forced to accept a man's cock would quickly get me there.

The story was nothing unfamiliar or extraordinary at first. And, then, came the blood. The broken bones. I was nauseated. Who the hell finds this sexy? It was too much. The words were less about the sex and more about the complete torture and violence.

Yet, still, I masturbated.

And, worse than that, I orgasmed.

I hated every second of it. I hated the author for finding it hot, I hated any other pervert who read the story and jacked to it, I hated the world for this depravity, I hated the site for being willing to host it, and, mostly, I hated myself for masturbating to it simply because I find it erotic to feel nauseated and hateful.

I threw up afterwards.

 

[bridgeburner]

Maybe it's in the air. We've got a strange wind blowing here for the third day in a row.

I rocked one hard yesterday thinking of an unpleasant fellow relating the details of a woman's torture and rape to her husband/boyfriend/SO. It was along the lines of "and then we....and then he.....and then I.....and I think she really liked it when he......she sure squealed enough." No major disfiguring torture but there were straight pins involved. I got flashes of what they did to the woman, but more what I focused on was the words as the foul fellow taunted the distraught husband.

I creeped myself out. Hell, I'm creeping myself out right now, but it was a solid 8.5 on the O-scale.

 

[Batch]

a nice return to the pleasuring

just relaxing and allowing myself
to sneak up on me

good release, nothing fancy
a threesome and the thoughts of men masturbating

loving the hands touching and caressing

 

[Wok]

So I grabbed the tweezers and microscope...

 

[Batch]

So I grabbed the tweezers and microscope...

liar...

of course I missed it...

 

[Wok]

liar...

of course I missed it...

It was for a limited time. If you want to see it that badly, I'll PM it to you. How about that?

 

[Batch]

It was for a limited time. If you want to see it that badly, I'll PM it to you. How about that?

ah, *thinking*

yes, please.

 

[Wok]

ah, *thinking*

yes, please.

Very well. Give me a few moments.

 

[Wok]

fuck

oopssie