LJ_Reloaded
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- Apr 3, 2010
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"Hitting the wall" is a slang term for when a woman reaches an age or point in her life where her sexual attractiveness diminishes severely, or even disappears altogether. Women rarely use the term "hit the wall" - they say things like no man wants her because "she's fat" or because "she isn't as pretty as she used to be", or men only want hot babes, etc.
A short google search brings up thousands of examples like these:
http://www.evanmarckatz.com/blog/da...women-where-does-that-leave-an-average-woman/
http://www.smh.com.au/federal-polit...omen-lose-the-dating-game-20120421-1xdn0.html
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/wo...ing-women-in-their-thirties-feel-past-it.html
http://faithchic.hubpages.com/hub/Men-Dont-Date-Fat-Women
http://www.crunkfeministcollective....-need-love-too-dating-while-fat-and-feminist/
Of course you won't just find this online or in women's magazines. You will also find that society at large complains about men who discriminate on the basis of looks. In "Shallow Hal" a guy gets a curse (via hypnosis) slapped on him because he is fixated on beautiful women. Women found this assault on male superficiality so compelling that the movie grossed $140 million, over 3 times what it cost to make.
The message women and society at large want men to get, is simple: men are superficial. Stop being superficial. Please stop punishing women who "hit the wall".
Well, ladies, your wish can be granted to you. However, in order for that to happen, you're going to have to check your privilege and self-entitlement into the trash can. And learn a little respect while you're at it.
First, the irrefutable facts of life. Considering the easily observed, extremely wide diversity of men's tastes in women, the concept of "hitting the wall" cannot be anything other than inaccurate, insulting to men, and a monumental statement of self-entitlement. The reality is, if you walk down the street you'll find plenty of women who both fit society's collective and puerile descriptions of ugly and fat, and have a man at their side. Women in their 30s and 40s are also finding men to date, have sex with, and some are even getting married to men. Ten seconds in any major shopping mall can reveal the apparently alarming truth of women who obviously "hit the wall", being paired up with men.
I know, it's a bit shocking, ladies. Old, fat and ugly women who found boyfriends. Who'd have thought! But it does happen.
Now that we've gone over the facts of life, what does the distressed woman who sees herself as a victim of "the wall" do next?
The only thing you can do, ladies, is look at yourself and what you're doing wrong. There are more than enough single men out there. So if other women just like you are finding men, and you're not, then the problem is you. You've been quick to make this same argument to men who complain about being single: now it's your turn to learn the lesson you have imparted to them.
Or you can continue to complain about how guys don't like old, fat or ugly women, even though you invariably passed by a few paired-up women of that type on your way around town today.
You need to stop complaining about the wall, and accept the fact that there is no wall. Some men prefer one kind of woman, while other men prefer other kinds, and some men aren't as hard up about looks as others.
Declaring that your chances at love are swirling in the toilet because of your looks, size or age, is not only just a misconception, though. It is an attempt to deny men their rights to choose who they date. It is an attempt to shame men for exercising their freedom of romantic choices and association. Imagine if some self declared Nice Guy came along and chastised women for not dating short guys. Sorry about pushing your rage button there... well, actually, no, not sorry. Did that attack on your freedom of romantic choice anger you? Well, it should - problem is, though, when you whine about men not liking fat, old or ugly women, you're doing the same exact thing.
Of course, if your answer is that you're a woman and you have the right to chastise men for their choices, well, that's why you're single. The men around you smell your self-entitlement, arrogance and disrespect of their rights as human beings, and don't want to deal with that. And so here you are: single, with only your entitled attitude to keep you warm.
Shaming and verbally coercing men into accepting you is not the way to go. You wouldn't want a Nice Guy to shame you into dating him, would you? Well then. "The Wall" is nothing more than a woman's way of telling men that they shouldn't have the freedom to choose. Coercion is not sexy. Enthusiastic consent is.
A short google search brings up thousands of examples like these:
http://www.evanmarckatz.com/blog/da...women-where-does-that-leave-an-average-woman/
http://www.smh.com.au/federal-polit...omen-lose-the-dating-game-20120421-1xdn0.html
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/wo...ing-women-in-their-thirties-feel-past-it.html
http://faithchic.hubpages.com/hub/Men-Dont-Date-Fat-Women
http://www.crunkfeministcollective....-need-love-too-dating-while-fat-and-feminist/
Of course you won't just find this online or in women's magazines. You will also find that society at large complains about men who discriminate on the basis of looks. In "Shallow Hal" a guy gets a curse (via hypnosis) slapped on him because he is fixated on beautiful women. Women found this assault on male superficiality so compelling that the movie grossed $140 million, over 3 times what it cost to make.
The message women and society at large want men to get, is simple: men are superficial. Stop being superficial. Please stop punishing women who "hit the wall".
Well, ladies, your wish can be granted to you. However, in order for that to happen, you're going to have to check your privilege and self-entitlement into the trash can. And learn a little respect while you're at it.
First, the irrefutable facts of life. Considering the easily observed, extremely wide diversity of men's tastes in women, the concept of "hitting the wall" cannot be anything other than inaccurate, insulting to men, and a monumental statement of self-entitlement. The reality is, if you walk down the street you'll find plenty of women who both fit society's collective and puerile descriptions of ugly and fat, and have a man at their side. Women in their 30s and 40s are also finding men to date, have sex with, and some are even getting married to men. Ten seconds in any major shopping mall can reveal the apparently alarming truth of women who obviously "hit the wall", being paired up with men.
I know, it's a bit shocking, ladies. Old, fat and ugly women who found boyfriends. Who'd have thought! But it does happen.
Now that we've gone over the facts of life, what does the distressed woman who sees herself as a victim of "the wall" do next?
The only thing you can do, ladies, is look at yourself and what you're doing wrong. There are more than enough single men out there. So if other women just like you are finding men, and you're not, then the problem is you. You've been quick to make this same argument to men who complain about being single: now it's your turn to learn the lesson you have imparted to them.
Or you can continue to complain about how guys don't like old, fat or ugly women, even though you invariably passed by a few paired-up women of that type on your way around town today.
You need to stop complaining about the wall, and accept the fact that there is no wall. Some men prefer one kind of woman, while other men prefer other kinds, and some men aren't as hard up about looks as others.
Declaring that your chances at love are swirling in the toilet because of your looks, size or age, is not only just a misconception, though. It is an attempt to deny men their rights to choose who they date. It is an attempt to shame men for exercising their freedom of romantic choices and association. Imagine if some self declared Nice Guy came along and chastised women for not dating short guys. Sorry about pushing your rage button there... well, actually, no, not sorry. Did that attack on your freedom of romantic choice anger you? Well, it should - problem is, though, when you whine about men not liking fat, old or ugly women, you're doing the same exact thing.
Of course, if your answer is that you're a woman and you have the right to chastise men for their choices, well, that's why you're single. The men around you smell your self-entitlement, arrogance and disrespect of their rights as human beings, and don't want to deal with that. And so here you are: single, with only your entitled attitude to keep you warm.
Shaming and verbally coercing men into accepting you is not the way to go. You wouldn't want a Nice Guy to shame you into dating him, would you? Well then. "The Wall" is nothing more than a woman's way of telling men that they shouldn't have the freedom to choose. Coercion is not sexy. Enthusiastic consent is.
