is is weird to get into bed and not have sex right away??

[Tx girl]

First off Richard, ignore the stupid fuckers!!!( sorry i know bad bad mouth) But you know it just annoys the hell out of me when people do that. This is an open forum, and for gods sake its a sex chat board. They either need to get the fuck over themselves or just dont read this thread. There are some of us that enjoy visiting and getting to know you guys.

Ok back up you were arrogant? Why because you know what you like and what you want? I would think arrogant would be the "oh im so beautiful, i can have it all BS. And that person DID RESPOND to your ad. Thats right YOUR AD. He/she damn sure didn't have to and im pretty sure you didn't beg them to, atleast not after the side of you we've all seen. I in no way see why your ad would be selfish. Honest yes, but not selfish. And yes it was personal. After all it was a personal ad.

I never knew you were robbed by your date muchless by knife point. Thats just friggen crazy. Your intitled to be picky, that is what a personal ad is for, and no your right i would be extremly pissed had i gotten those messages. Maybe the better way to have handled the situation would have been to either ignore them, or simply send one back saying im sorry you feel that way, and you shouldn't judge someone you don't know.


You know me Richard im going to ask something of you, DO NOT let these loser idiots keep you away from your friends here. Thats not only right for those who happen to like you and those of us getting to know you.

EVERYONE has a right to their own opinion. Ane especially everyone has a right to be happy.

These people are irrogant and closed minded. Igore those babe. They just aren't worth the trouble and the hurt they've caused you.


UnTamedOne, good for you. And your right. Luvspats i think has inspired us and many others in so many ways he himself dosen't know.


You see Richard there are many MANY that do agree with you, and the others with the hurtful words, well, as i said they bite and maybe its as MizTabby said. Maybe some feel the need to lash out. Just don't let that affect you. I have a feeling also that you are much to smart and kind hearted of a man to let this keep on bugging you. There ae some spiteful people here at lit, yet there are those of us that arent. We do like you, but i think you can see that in our posts to you.

 

[Tx girl]

Edited to say i hope it all makes since and the spelling isn't horrible. Im still in the insomnia mode. Seems to only kick in though when im online!


AND that CuddlyB needs to get his butt back here and post with us!!!!

 

[luvpats4unme]

thank you again

Hi Tx girl and Tabby et al. LOL Thank you for your kind words. What gets me is that this is supposed to be an open forum to express your views ("support free speach online") yet I did not understand the need to be called an asshole or other like-minded name calling. Even in my other post ("Please do not send hate mail to me") I was bombarded with hate mail and name calling.
If people think that way this is fine I was just suprised at all the what I considered "immature" and disrespectful nature of the
so-called responses in my email and some in my PM box.

And the person who expressed their views about my personal ad I was very suprised about considering the number of posts this individual has made and even has had one thread directed at their life history. True I got mad and sent some negative things back to these individuals but who wouldn't be mad??

Again if someone does not like my personal ad then they need not respond. I don't need to be told in detail what an arrogant asshole I am. I already know that to be a fact!!!! My friends constantly tell me that I am an "asshole with a good heart". . .
I totally agree with them. . .best wishes from Richard

 

[dragonhearted]

First off Richard, ignore the stupid fuckers!!!( sorry I know bad bad mouth) But you know it just annoys the hell out of me when people do that. This is an open forum, and for gods sake its a sex chat board. They either need to get the fuck over themselves or just dont read this thread. There are some of us that enjoy visiting and getting to know you guys.

Ok back up you were arrogant? Why because you know what you like and what you want? I would think arrogant would be the "oh I'm so beautiful, I can have it all" BS. And that person DID RESPOND to your ad. Thats right YOUR AD. He/she damn sure didn't have to and I'm pretty sure you didn't beg them to, at least not after the side of you we've all seen. I in no way see why your ad would be selfish. Honest yes, but not selfish. And yes it was personal. After all it was a personal ad.

I never knew you were robbed by your date much less by knife point. Thats just friggen crazy. Your entitled to be picky, that is what a personal ad is for, and no you're right I would be extremly pissed had I gotten those messages. Maybe the better way to have handled the situation would have been to either ignore them, or simply send one back saying im sorry you feel that way, and you shouldn't judge someone you don't know.


You know me Richard. I'm going to ask something of you: DO NOT let these loser idiots keep you away from your friends here. That's not only right for those who happen to like you and those of us getting to know you.

EVERYONE has a right to their own opinion. And especially everyone has a right to be happy.

These people are arrogant and closed minded. Ignore those babe. They just aren't worth the trouble and the hurt they've caused you.


UnTamedOne, good for you. And you're right. Luvspats I think has inspired us and many others in so many ways he himself doesn't know.


You see Richard there are many MANY that do agree with you, and the others with the hurtful words, well, as I said they bite and maybe it's as MizTabby said. Maybe some feel the need to lash out. Just don't let that affect you. I have a feeling also that you are much too smart and kind-hearted of a man to let this keep on bugging you. There are some spiteful people here at lit, yet there are those of us that arent. We do like you, but I think you can see that in our posts to you.

here here! *applauds*

 

[luvpats4unme]

what I have accepted is. . .

What I have come to terms with lately is that the right one for me does not exist. I feel I am destined to be single forever. I mean a caucasian church-going spanker/spankee with a very high sex drive and positive attitude who is extremely healthy physically that can get into bed and not have intercourse right away while at the same time spanking, cuddling, caressing, cumming manually etc. etc. . .that individual does not exist. However it is what I am looking for so I keep the faith that she is out there somewhere but not on this board or on CL or alt.com or any of the other sites I have posted nor at my church since I was kicked out of the singles group for believing that masturbating was not a sin and of course my spanking fetish didn't help either. . .maybe start a Catholic spanking Yahoo group?? NNNNNoooooooooo. . . .
I would probably be booted from Yahoo too!!!

 

[cuddlybear1970]

I am back, just working my backside off. And Richard, do not dispair, I actually met someone over an online game named Erin, she lives in Oregon, and fits your desires to a T. So yes, they do exist, that is all the info I have however, although she did mention having red hair, and being 23, don't ever give up. If there is one, there are more, and you will find yours.

Best regards
John

 

[Tx girl]

Luvpats, to simply answer your question about the open forum's statement you said in your other post. The fact is, is that some people think its ok for them to think what they want but not ok for others. They're idiots!!

I figure this, they are obviously reading and going along with this thread... soooooo... from me to all of YOU CLOSE MINDED FOOLS, leave people alone. They are allowed to feel as they wish. Now back the F**K up and leave my friend alone.

*whew* that kinda felt good! Even though i was much nicer then i had planned to be!


Ty Dragon!


Richard i totally disagree with you saying that you don't believe the right lady is out there for you, that she dosen't exist. She does your just not looking for here in the right spots. And i can't believe you told your church you thought masturbation wasn't a sin. Im sorry but i got a chuckle out of that!!! When i was a kid and had to go to church they probably would have done more then just kick me out of one thing! Not to mention my grandma would have had my head. Even though i agree, it shoulcn't be considered a sin.


Hi Cuddly, good to see you again, and PLEASE don't work off your backside!!!

 

[luvpats4unme]

it was the singles group that I got kicked out of

It was the church singles group that I got kicked out of. . .I still go to the church. . .they weren't too keen on the spanking thing either. . .it was ok though. . .talk about hyppocrital individuals. . .some of those people thought kissing was a sin

I probably am not looking in the right areas but I have no idea where to look anymore. . .most women (and men) think I am weird just read some of those hateful emails I received. . .I even get blasted for my personal ad. . .

ok so I am weird who isn't?????? I have accepted myself for who I am although there are a few things I do need to change about myself but I am working on that. . .who doesn't need to work on their own selves???????

 

[potatohead]

Potatoehead i agree with you most relationships are short lived after having sex on the first date. Myself i'd really wonder about a guys true intentions if he wanted that from me so soon. I'd wonder if thats all he's wanted to begin with. I'd most definatly want to know that this guy is really "into" me. And in the same turn both true for guys and gals it tends to hurt the others feelings knowing and thinking that, thats the one thing he was after to begin with. Make sense?? LOL i sure hope so because i think i might have confused myself saying all that.

Nah, that makes total sense. I've never gone on a first date with the idea of having sex, it's usually something that just happens

I never complain about it but I value someone's company more then I value a warm wet pussy. The last time I had sex on the first date (three times total) the relationship lasted about 2 1/2 months and was very lust driven. I can honestly say that it was the most consistantly good sex I've ever had. The problem was that the women didn't have a lot of depth to her. After a few weeks I started to feel guilty about it and then I started thinking that maybe she didn't have much else to offer. I dunno. Has anyone else ever thought that about a partner?

 

[dragonhearted]

Re: what I have accepted is. . .

What I have come to terms with lately is that the right one for me does not exist. I feel I am destined to be single forever. I mean a caucasian church-going spanker/spankee with a very high sex drive and positive attitude who is extremely healthy physically that can get into bed and not have intercourse right away while at the same time spanking, cuddling, caressing, cumming manually etc. etc. . .that individual does not exist. However it is what I am looking for so I keep the faith that she is out there somewhere but not on this board or on CL or alt.com or any of the other sites I have posted nor at my church since I was kicked out of the singles group for believing that masturbating was not a sin and of course my spanking fetish didn't help either. . .maybe start a Catholic spanking Yahoo group?? NNNNNoooooooooo. . . .
I would probably be booted from Yahoo too!!!

Please don't think that way! There has to be a way for you to reconcile your fetishes and your beliefs without having to compromise either one. As for masturbation being a "sin", I grew up with that one. I will regret to this day not having learned how till my ex (my then husband) showed me how! The circumstances I grew up under, however, would not have alllowed for much privacy. Some churches would agree though that it is better to masturbate than to practice promiscuity (as some might put it). How can it be a sin to know your own body? To know what it takes to please you, so you can show someone else how? BTW, if you owned, moderated etc, your OWN Spanking Yahoo Group...Catholic or not, Yahoo could not boot you out. I'm sorry I am involved though (not for me though)...I DO have a VERY high sex drive. However, mine is due in part to the fact that I need the physical contact and the high that it brings. Sexual intercourse is a bonding experience. I am an empath...someone that can feel other people's pain, pleasure...feelings. Even when I don't get off, I still feel incredible when they do! Cuddling is something I love to do anyway....part of me is still very much a child.

 

[MizTabby]

a few good people

Tx girl, thanks for being sooo very supportive
of Richardluvpats and for being so frank in your views,
there's a spark in you that I hope will always be kindled.
It's disheartening how some people feel it's allright to
express themselves yet are so unwelcoming to others,
but I feel we can learn and grow from all experiences.
now you are a dear friend!

Nice seeing you cuddlyb, all that work going on, hope you
get a litttle relax and fun time in this weekend

potatohead, I know just where you're coming from and
have felt like that too, I think it is important that he/she
does have more to offer, makes being together so
much more special! ^5

glad to see you over here, dragonhearted, good suggestion
about that "spanking goup", hope lovepats makes a move,
yes!! cuddling ought to be a part of us all, it's one of the
best ways to be intimate and playful, at the same time, we
should never neglect the child in us

 

[luvpats4unme]

I would need help starting one

I would not mind helping out with a spanking group-maybe start an offshoot of the Lit group members (those that are nice) but for those that enjoy both giving and receiving only!! However
I would not know how to do that and how do you get people to join?? There are enough groups out there for just dom's or subs but I have never seen one for those who switch. . .it would be interesting but you do need a base to work from. . .

 

[luvpats4unme]

I would need help starting one

I would not mind helping out with a spanking group-maybe start an offshoot of the Lit group members (those that are nice) but for those that enjoy both giving and receiving only!! However
I would not know how to do that and how do you get people to join?? There are enough groups out there for just dom's or subs but I have never seen one for those who switch. . .it would be interesting but you do need a base to work from. . .

Thank you so much Carol for your beautiful email. It really cheered me up!! hugs to you!!. . . .

 

[dragonhearted]

A New Yahoo Group!

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/spankingnothernicethings


I started it and it's open to all. Richard, if you want it to be more exclusive, let me know via email (I have that function on my profile, and it goes to same one that group stuff goes to). We can make this whatever you want it to be. OK?

*hugs*

Suzanne

 

[luvpats4unme]

great idea!!

I like the description you posted!! Now how do we get others with the same interests to join?? I never have figured out how a Yahoo group gets started and then all of a sudden 500 people join. Maybe post the link in the Lit personals?? Maybe Carol can help here too!!

Well the bummer part about being single is going to a concert by yourself. . .tonite I am going to try and see Simon & Garfunkel but again I am going alone. . .the good part is that someone almost always has an extra ticket that I can pick up cheap. . .not always but most of the time. . .I saw the Rolling Stones from 13th row center for $25 had a great time and the individual who had the ticket worked for a record company and had only one extra. . .sometimes you luck out but I would much rather be with someone to go with. . .

 

[smartandsexy]

Wow! I've just read this whole thread, and how refreshing it is.

I have similar thoughts and feelings to many of you. I made a promise to myself when I was younger that the first time I had sex it would be within a committed, secure relationship with someone that I loved and who loved me, and someone that would feel honoured that I wanted to share my virginity with them. Sadly (and bloody frustratingly!) at 27, I still haven't found that relationship. Despite that, I am an *extremely* sexual person and love to be physically close, but there's just that one act that I want to keep special for that special someone. A lot of people find it very hard to reconcile my sexuality and my self-control, but I know that if I had sex with someone that didn't love, cherish and respect me, I'd feel like shit afterwards, so really it's no sacrifice. So far, no one that I've loved has thought I was worth waiting for........ so to the men who posted, the experience goes both ways.

I so didn't think I was still going to be a virgin at 27 (nearly 28). I'm hoping the right man is out there somewhere but BLOODY HELL HURRY UP!!!!!!

Hmmmmm..perhaps I really shouldn't have shared all this personal information Sod it!

S xx

 

[smartandsexy]

Re: what I have accepted is. . .

... nor at my church since I was kicked out of the singles group for believing that masturbating was not a sin and of course my spanking fetish didn't help either. . .maybe start a Catholic spanking Yahoo group??

This did bring a smile to my face Reminded me of my RE teacher at the convent school I went to who responded to a girl's question about masturbation by saying it was normal, healthy and positive. This got back to a parent word got round...and at her next teachers' conference she was known as the outrageous masturbation woman! Ironic how they've been happy to let the priests abuse children, but if anyone should play with themselves, they're going straight to hell.....

 

[dragonhearted]

yes..very ironic!

 

[luvpats4unme]

bummer!!!

Well I drive all the way up to Anaheimen with rush hour traffic and an accident to boot and what do ya know but S & G cancel their show!!

bummer!!

Me thinks them boys is fightin' again!! Time for a good whoopin'!!

Hey we got four members in your group Suzanne!! How do we get more??

 

[potatohead]

I so didn't think I was still going to be a virgin at 27 (nearly 28). I'm hoping the right man is out there somewhere but BLOODY HELL HURRY UP!!!!!!

No offense intended here because it's largely a personal choice. But what are you waiting for?!?! If you haven't met ANYONE by the age of 27 you might be too picky or be looking for that 1 in a million person. I'm not saying that you shoul run out and have a one night stand but it might be worth some personal reflection to see why the guys you've met haven't measured up.

 

[smartandsexy]

No offense intended here because it's largely a personal choice. But what are you waiting for?!?! If you haven't met ANYONE by the age of 27 you might be too picky or be looking for that 1 in a million person. I'm not saying that you shoul run out and have a one night stand but it might be worth some personal reflection to see why the guys you've met haven't measured up.

Looking in from an outside perspective, I see your point, but it's not a case of men not having measured up or me setting impossibly high standards. I just find it more difficult than most to find someone where that mutual (rather than one-sided) spark is there (and that's not something you can control), and then things haven't worked out one way or another. I would say it's not at all unusual not to have met the right person by 27, I'm just unusual in not having had sex with any of the 'not right' people, and as you say, that's my choice and I'm not prepared to compromise on that one as it's important to me.

I'm realistic, but I'm not prepared to settle on someone not right for the sake of not being alone or getting a good shag. I would rather be on my own than with the wrong person. I want to be with someone I can connect with emotionally, intellectually, physically and spiritually and have one hell of laugh with....and I'm hoping and praying that I can find that one day.

And believe me, I've done *tons* of personal reflection Which is why at this stage I hold the firm belief that I deserve something wonderful and I'm holding out for that.

 

[luvpats4unme]

I applaud you for waiting. . .

No offense here either but I think it is really good that you are waiting. . .I wish I had waited I hated my first experience and have not had a very satisfying sex life and I have done alot of personal reflection which is why I have chosen. . .weird or not. . .to enjoy getting into bed and not having sex right away even though I have yet to meet in person anyone within the past two and one half years that believes and feels the way I do and has the same interests that I do. . .it is another reason why I have become so picky in what I seek. . .case in point I was "set-up" on a meeting with someone who responded to another personal ad I have running on another site. . .I was told it was a perfect "match" in fact the woman, out of the blue, called me last nite wanting to meet. . .problem is that she is not religious and doesn't spank even though she loves to receive. . .and so whoever set us up did not bother to read the entire ad. . .although she did agree that getting into bed and not having sex was a great idea. . .so as selfish as this may seem unless she wants to go to church with me and wants to spank me I am not interested and even though she asked me to call her today she has not returned either of my two messages

oh btw what does it mean to be "submissive"??? it seems to me just receiving a spanking is not being submissive that is what she likes not necessarily a submissive trait. . .certainly not returning messages isn't submissive. . .it is rude not to in my book especially after the person tells you to call them and also tells you not to call them after 12 noon?? sounds controlling and dominant to me plus rude not to at least acknowledge the calls

in fact I have never understood why someone asks you to call them at a certain time they are not there to accept the call and then they don't return the messages or calls. . .that raises a red flag for me. . .

 

[dragonhearted]

Re: bummer!!!

Well I drive all the way up to Anaheimen with rush hour traffic and an accident to boot and what do ya know but S & G cancel their show!!

bummer!!

Me thinks them boys is fightin' again!! Time for a good whoopin'!!

Hey we got four members in your group Suzanne!! How do we get more??

drops her pants, lifts her shirt and does a little dance

there! think that'll work?

 

[dragonhearted]

Richard...being a submissive is a mindset, not merely a matter of what fetishes turn you on. Some people feel more secure when they are controlled by another person. I think there are some people though who will put up with almost anything just to get some kind of sexual attention, whether it is vaginally, anally or spanking. The fact is...it is attention that makes them feel alive and wanted.

I know just how that feels.

 

[potatohead]

I'm realistic, but I'm not prepared to settle on someone not right for the sake of not being alone or getting a good shag. I would rather be on my own than with the wrong person. I want to be with someone I can connect with emotionally, intellectually, physically and spiritually and have one hell of laugh with....and I'm hoping and praying that I can find that one day.

How long was your longest relationship?

Take this for whatever it's worth.

I'm 25 and I dated a girl for 4 years and had known her for just over six before I called it quits and we went our seperate ways. I don't regret for a second ANY of the time I spent with her. To be totally honest I had gone ring shopping and the subject of marriage had come up a few times and yes, we even lived together. She wasn't my first but I was her first and it always bugged her. One time after we had sex she told me that she wanted to be with another guy before we got married just so she would know what it was like to have sex with someone else. I encouraged her and she never went through with it but it started to dismantle our relationship. I'd hate for someone else to go through the same thing.

On a related note, when I was in college I was friends with a really great looking guy who could pick up almost any women he wanted (he was really hot) and he would always come back with, ummmm...not ugly but very average looking women. One night while we were out I asked him why he wasn't picker since he could be and the supermodel figured women were always falling over him. His words?

It's all practice for the one that counts.

Left me speachless.