Is being a gay man and not liking anal common?

[beardedwanker]

So, over the past few years I've accepted that I'm bi. In fact I'd say I'm more gay than straight and if anything happened between my wife and I I don't think I'd have another relationship with a woman.

I've never been into anal sex. Both giving and receiving. If I'm honest I'm not that bothered with vaginal sex. Sure it's good but I much prefer hands and mouths to penetrative sex.

My query is are gay men who don't like anal common? All I see is people being a top or a bottom, but I've heard the term "side" for men who dont do anal but it's not something I come across much at all. Is this rare?

 

[Excitabletom]

I'm bi and prefer hands and oral over anal. I topped once many years ago to a FWB (M/M). I would rather orally service a man. That being said, I do enjoy a little anal probing and teasing from my wife, just not looking for cock in butt sex.

Sounds funny now that I have typed this out. Maybe I just need a FWB that will teach more about anal? I do know it did hurt the one time I did to try to receive years ago. Maybe the scared me?

 

[Escierto]

Studies show that anywhere from 25% to 50% of gay men do not have anal sex regularly.

 

[dodgeboy2]

Studies show that anywhere from 25% to 50% of gay men do not have anal sex regularly.

I am a bit surprised at that range, yes maybe 25% but up to 50% I would say I have my doubts although I guess if a guy that likes anal finds a relationship with a man that doesn't it might work kind of like a straight man that likes blowjobs marrying a girl that absolutely hates them sometimes works!

 

[ZOEOHZOE]

okay so I always thought anal sex went along with gay but not necessarily bi

 

[BiDrew42]

One of my current regular partners has never been anally penetrated. He is 100% gay, has never been with a female, but is completely turned off by the thought of a finger or cock in his ass. He will fuck me with his huge cock any time, he likes when I rim him as long as I don't try to insert my tongue, and he will suck my cock and rim me occasionally. I find it a little odd but it t works for us because I prefer to bottom and I love to worship his 26cm cock!

 

[Britva415]

Studies show that anywhere from 25% to 50% of gay men do not have anal sex regularly.

"Do not have" or "do not receive?"

 

[Escierto]

"Do not have" or "do not receive?"

From what I read, it was do not partake in the activity as giver or recipient.

 

[wankerholic42]

I’m gay and have fucked guys in the past and on rare occasions have been the receiver, but I found it very painful. I’ve always preferred masturbating a guy as I love the feel of a hard cock in my hand and get very turned on watching him ejaculate. As I have a particular penchant for married guys this suits me fine as they are usually more than happy to be jacked off. Perhaps they think it’s safer and maybe they feel it less gay than indulging in anal.
I have to say, if you’ll excuse my immodesty, over the years I have developed the handjob into an art form. God, doesn’t that sound poncey?!! I guess I’ve had a lot of practice over the years.
Oh, and I do enjoy giving oral and yes, I swallow as well. But this usually only occurs after I’ve brought a guy off by hand before and watched him cum.

 

[mtsnowrider]

I much prefer sucking and being sucked or stroking. Anal always sounds like its going to be great and I like to rim and get rimmed but actually being penetrated does not live up to the fantasy in my head

 

[none2_none2]

I much prefer sucking and being sucked or stroking. Anal always sounds like its going to be great and I like to rim and get rimmed but actually being penetrated does not live up to the fantasy in my head

For me toping in anal was truly the only part of m2m sex that was ever that wonderful. So in some ways I'm the opposite of you.

I never enjoyed someone else jacking me off, as their hands just don't do the right thing as one's own hand. I never got the joy of things like frottaging. Likewise, I never understood the kinkier things like water sports, scat, cock & ball torture, humiliation for examples.

Now as for getting oral from a guy -- it was pleasant, but was never orgasmic. It was best used as foreplay to help get me hard before fucking the guy. When I first started m2m sex centuries ago, older guys had led me to believe that I was suppose to NOT be a top as that was reserved for hung guys. I never though that much to begin with about penises. Thus putting a stranger's cock in my mouth was nothing I cared for nor craved, and being penetrated I didn't like at all. I thought that horrible m2m sex was the punishment for desiring a man's affection. Then about two years into my journey when a guy finally let me top, I realized how WONDERFUL sex with another man could be. I always had an inclining that I was a top as I always gravitated towards looking at men's behinds even at an age that I cannot share. When i looked at men's penises it was from a stand point that if it was huge, I wish it was what mine was -- not that i wanted it in me or that I wanted to play with it.

Now I know for some anal sex penetration is painful, and given I found it miserable myself, I don't begrudge guys who don't want to bottom. I would simply not have been compatible with such guys. Now for plenty of guys, their aversion to anal had nothing to do with that, but rather a smug attitude of superiority for not doing anal. Some would claim that real straights don't like anal because it is gross, so str8's should accept gays/bi's like them because they don't doing anything gross. When AIDS came out some had the attitude that if you did ANAL you were guilty of doing sex that was diseased in its very nature. Never mind, that anal sex had been done since the probably the beginning of human history. It was ok for such people to shame anybody who spoke positively about anal sex.

It is all behind me since I have ED. My life would be simpler of I did get off on oral as oral doesn't require such a stiff hardon. Where as just try to top in anal if you aren't very hard is a non-starter. Nevertheless, if my partner were to die, I could not fathom even dating a guy who didn't find his ass as an erogenous area. Also keep in mind that for me, even as much as I craved a man's ass, the biggest turn on was if I cared for the guy. I'll never understand the love-cock-not-men mentality that dominates some of the posters on Literotica. I was never a love-man-ass-not men equivalent guy. It was always more lof a ove-a-special-guy-AND... (the more he can be described as masculine, lovable, muscular, hairy, and fuckable) the more he would have a hard time keeping me from following him like a puppy dog.

PS: 25 to 50 percent gays/bi's not doing anal sex??? Sorry, but that sounds unrealistic. It wasn't that way when I was young, and I would find it hard to believe that such a high number now don't like their behinds played with.

 

[SuperSissy]

I love to be fucked, and have been many times over the years. There's so many emotions and feelings, from the submission to the physical stimulation. But I would never top. Oddly enough, I feel it is dirty to stick my cock in someone's butt. Go figure....

 

[Escierto]

For me toping in anal was truly the only part of m2m sex that was ever that wonderful. So in some ways I'm the opposite of you.

I never enjoyed someone else jacking me off, as their hands just don't do the right thing as one's own hand. I never got the joy of things like frottaging. Likewise, I never understood the kinkier things like water sports, scat, cock & ball torture, humiliation for examples.

Now as for getting oral from a guy -- it was pleasant, but was never orgasmic. It was best used as foreplay to help get me hard before fucking the guy. When I first started m2m sex centuries ago, older guys had led me to believe that I was suppose to NOT be a top as that was reserved for hung guys. I never though that much to begin with about penises. Thus putting a stranger's cock in my mouth was nothing I cared for nor craved, and being penetrated I didn't like at all. I thought that horrible m2m sex was the punishment for desiring a man's affection. Then about two years into my journey when a guy finally let me top, I realized how WONDERFUL sex with another man could be. I always had an inclining that I was a top as I always gravitated towards looking at men's behinds even at an age that I cannot share. When i looked at men's penises it was from a stand point that if it was huge, I wish it was what mine was -- not that i wanted it in me or that I wanted to play with it.

Now I know for some anal sex penetration is painful, and given I found it miserable myself, I don't begrudge guys who don't want to bottom. I would simply not have been compatible with such guys. Now for plenty of guys, their aversion to anal had nothing to do with that, but rather a smug attitude of superiority for not doing anal. Some would claim that real straights don't like anal because it is gross, so str8's should accept gays/bi's like them because they don't doing anything gross. When AIDS came out some had the attitude that if you did ANAL you were guilty of doing sex that was diseased in its very nature. Never mind, that anal sex had been done since the probably the beginning of human history. It was ok for such people to shame anybody who spoke positively about anal sex.

It is all behind me since I have ED. My life would be simpler of I did get off on oral as oral doesn't require such a stiff hardon. Where as just try to top in anal if you aren't very hard is a non-starter. Nevertheless, if my partner were to die, I could not fathom even dating a guy who didn't find his ass as an erogenous area. Also keep in mind that for me, even as much as I craved a man's ass, the biggest turn on was if I cared for the guy. I'll never understand the love-cock-not-men mentality that dominates some of the posters on Literotica. I was never a love-man-ass-not men equivalent guy. It was always more lof a ove-a-special-guy-AND... (the more he can be described as masculine, lovable, muscular, hairy, and fuckable) the more he would have a hard time keeping me from following him like a puppy dog.

PS: 25 to 50 percent gays/bi's not doing anal sex??? Sorry, but that sounds unrealistic. It wasn't that way when I was young, and I would find it hard to believe that such a high number now don't like their behinds played with.

I found those numbers hard to believe as well but it's what I found when I searched.

I can relate to your statements about your partner. I love my girlfriend's beautiful big cock because it is attached to her. I would love her cock no matter what size it was. I would want her to top me because I love being mated and inseminated by her. She is my love.

 

[mtsnowrider]

For me toping in anal was truly the only part of m2m sex that was ever that wonderful. So in some ways I'm the opposite of you.

I never enjoyed someone else jacking me off, as their hands just don't do the right thing as one's own hand. I never got the joy of things like frottaging. Likewise, I never understood the kinkier things like water sports, scat, cock & ball torture, humiliation for examples.

Now as for getting oral from a guy -- it was pleasant, but was never orgasmic. It was best used as foreplay to help get me hard before fucking the guy. When I first started m2m sex centuries ago, older guys had led me to believe that I was suppose to NOT be a top as that was reserved for hung guys. I never though that much to begin with about penises. Thus putting a stranger's cock in my mouth was nothing I cared for nor craved, and being penetrated I didn't like at all. I thought that horrible m2m sex was the punishment for desiring a man's affection. Then about two years into my journey when a guy finally let me top, I realized how WONDERFUL sex with another man could be. I always had an inclining that I was a top as I always gravitated towards looking at men's behinds even at an age that I cannot share. When i looked at men's penises it was from a stand point that if it was huge, I wish it was what mine was -- not that i wanted it in me or that I wanted to play with it.

Now I know for some anal sex penetration is painful, and given I found it miserable myself, I don't begrudge guys who don't want to bottom. I would simply not have been compatible with such guys. Now for plenty of guys, their aversion to anal had nothing to do with that, but rather a smug attitude of superiority for not doing anal. Some would claim that real straights don't like anal because it is gross, so str8's should accept gays/bi's like them because they don't doing anything gross. When AIDS came out some had the attitude that if you did ANAL you were guilty of doing sex that was diseased in its very nature. Never mind, that anal sex had been done since the probably the beginning of human history. It was ok for such people to shame anybody who spoke positively about anal sex.

It is all behind me since I have ED. My life would be simpler of I did get off on oral as oral doesn't require such a stiff hardon. Where as just try to top in anal if you aren't very hard is a non-starter. Nevertheless, if my partner were to die, I could not fathom even dating a guy who didn't find his ass as an erogenous area. Also keep in mind that for me, even as much as I craved a man's ass, the biggest turn on was if I cared for the guy. I'll never understand the love-cock-not-men mentality that dominates some of the posters on Literotica. I was never a love-man-ass-not men equivalent guy. It was always more lof a ove-a-special-guy-AND... (the more he can be described as masculine, lovable, muscular, hairy, and fuckable) the more he would have a hard time keeping me from following him like a puppy dog.

PS: 25 to 50 percent gays/bi's not doing anal sex??? Sorry, but that sounds unrealistic. It wasn't that way when I was young, and I would find it hard to believe that such a high number now don't like their behinds played with.

Actually I agree with much of what you say. The only time I enjoyed anal was with a long term friend with whom I felt a strong emotional connection. The very few times I tried it with a casual hook up ( and I emphasze "very few") it seemed mechanical and , dare I say, boring. Since I have not felt that connection again, stroking and sucking are simply a way to get off with another man.
And I would not even consider the " kinky stuff." But different strokes...

 

[Travler99921]

I have never met with the intent of having anal sex. However, a few men have got me hot enough that when they asked I became their bottom. I liked the submissive feeling it gave me. Ninty percent of the time sucking cock satisfies me.

 

[Bob_Aganoush]

I enjoy oral and touching with guys, but have no interest in anal. I’ve met a lot of guys in dating sites who are similar.

 

[Bisexguy70]

I enjoy oral and touching with guys, but have no interest in anal. I’ve met a lot of guys in dating sites who are similar.

Im right there with you. I enjoy the pleasures of oral and body contact, kissing etc but have no desire for anal. However I do fantasize about getting fucked as I masturbate or even being split roasted. I have topped a buddy of mine for years but ive never been keen on getting topped.

 

[Wobnair1]

For me it's as much the feeling of being dominated as the act of being fucked. That's why I love to suck cock.

 

[easyoff]

I have to really like the guy to give up my ass to him. He also has to be the perfect size.

 

[CambridgeBi]

My query is are gay men who don't like anal common? All I see is people being a top or a bottom, but I've heard the term "side" for men who dont do anal but it's not something I come across much at all. Is this rare?

I don't know if it's a local term but we refer to them as a vanilla and it's not rare at all. My first gay friend was a vanilla and I thought I was too until I got rimmed for the first time

 

[StkgsLover]

I’m bi and have never had anal sex with ether a man or woman. I much prefer holding a nice cock and sucking it. Same for myself I love being played with and being sucked.
https://cdn2.pictures.eroprofile.co...s=1536&token=6782ac5c42bebc15b750f59678b9ab61

 

[easyoff]

I don't know if it's a local term but we refer to them as a vanilla and it's not rare at all. My first gay friend was a vanilla and I thought I was too until I got rimmed for the first time

Getting rimmed will do it everytime.

 

[CambridgeBi]

Getting rimmed will do it everytime.

Yes, my transition from "ehh, I would never do that" to "I want his cock inside me" was very rapid

 

[bejjinks]

I'm going to link to a thread I started as part of my answer: Fantasy good, reality bad

I'm not totally opposed to anal but maybe the reason I have never enjoyed sex is because anal is not enjoyable, giving or receiving. Sometimes, I think what I would most enjoy would be frot because than we could kiss, hug and make love while frotting. That would mean more connection and chemistry than I can get from anal.

 

[wankerholic42]

I'm going to link to a thread I started as part of my answer: Fantasy good, reality bad

I'm not totally opposed to anal but maybe the reason I have never enjoyed sex is because anal is not enjoyable, giving or receiving. Sometimes, I think what I would most enjoy would be frot because than we could kiss, hug and make love while frotting. That would mean more connection and chemistry than I can get from anal.

Frotting is so-o-horny, particularly if you both cum at the same time.