Improvements?

[Lovernotkiller]

Theres a writtin way telling one how to increase their physical condition, sex, and dating, how about a personality change? Or are you stuck with it ?

thanks,
Joe

 

[SweetErika]

What, 'writtin' meaning written, as in books/websites/magazines/advice? And/or are you asking if it's possible to improve appearance, personality, actions, etc.?

 

[Lovernotkiller]

I mean you have documents on how to gain muscle , but is there any on change of personality or something to be a more socialable favorite? I dunno, think i might have a personality disorder or sumthin at times. Some times i attract people, sometimes i drive em away. So i need something written, as always, to tell me whats up with me.

Thanks,
Joe

 

[Ezzy]

So i need something written, as always, to tell me whats up with me.

Thanks,
Joe

1) You DO have a disorder of some kind, but I am not sure what it is without further consultations, my hourly fee is $450.00 per hour or part there of.

2) Please PayPal me at least $450.00 so we can continue this session!

3) This is in writing, so it may be enough for you, if it is not enough for you please follow step 2).

4) After the payment, additional consultations and tests, I will email you the results.

Do you have a printer or access to a printer? So I can be sure you will be able to see it written down!

 

[Exciteher]

I mean you have documents on how to gain muscle , but is there any on change of personality or something to be a more socialable favorite? I dunno, think i might have a personality disorder or sumthin at times. Some times i attract people, sometimes i drive em away. So i need something written, as always, to tell me whats up with me.

Thanks,
Joe

I understand what you are asking about. There are whole isles of boodstores (self-help) and tons on the internet about this, but unless you know what it is that you want to improve... its kind of hard to answer your question, and there is no one easy answer.

What specificially makes you think you have a social disorder?

What do you think you have that attracts people to you?

How do you think you drive them away?

If you have driven someone away, have you asked them why that happened?

What did they say?

How do you see yourself? Can you describe your personality?

How do you think others see you? Can you describe that?

What do you want for yourself?

What are your passions in life?

Can you think of three things about yourself you know you want to change right this second?

What do you think is up with you? If you don't know, what would you guess it is if you had to?

One thing I notice, is that you seem to have a hard time expressing yourself...that could cause all sorts of misunderstandings. Have you ever thought about taking a writing or speaking or communications class...just for fun? Taking classes is a great way to learn about yourself! And, it gives you a place to inter-act and get feedback!

In anycase, I applaud that you are interested in this, the world would be a better place if more people were!

 

[tonytone]

As someone who has spent more time thinking than is ever healthy, I have learned a few things: (i think)

Your trains of thought are habitual and therefore you will slip into these habits if gone unchecked.

If this these habits are negetive then the more you think the worse you will feel and so on. I suspect that at this moment someone saying "JUST dont think about sounds flippent but the funny thing is that to a large degree its true.

Look at young lads these days, specifically the thick, arrogant ones. They're the ones with the girls. The quiet lads are no where to be seen. In my humble opinion they are ignorant to there failings and blindly confident which is what attracts the young girls to them.

My own confidence level can vary. If I'm not feeling very confident I'm usually feeling self concious as well. When I'm feeling confident I JUST DONT GIVE A FUCK! and thats as simple as I can figure it.

Maybe that explains "dutch courage". Your brain cant think that same.

Second Soap Box statment:

I was once told that the key to correcting any mistake or learning for that matter follows the same pattern:

Unconcious incompetance - Not aware of the mistakes being made.
Concious incompetance - Aware of the mistakes being made
Concious competance - Correcting the mistakes with a concious effort
Unconicous competance - Getting it right and not having to think about it.

Example: Learning to drive.

Hope this sheds some light on the subject.


Tone

 

[M's girl]

Maybe that explains "dutch courage". Your brain cant think that same.

Please explain

 

[Lovernotkiller]

Hmm

Gonna think on the replies for a while(soak it up), if you guys don't mind I'm gonna PM further thoughts.


Thank you very much, just what i needed,
Joe

 

[M's girl]

You cannot change (your) personality. Life is what makes you a certain way. You can influence what happens in your life, though, which will then make you experience different, better, things, which COULD make you a better person if you react to them the 'right way'....

Life's what you make it and life's what forms you. Edit your life wisely, that's all you can do. Bad things may happen but that's not the issue: it's the way you deal with it.

 

[Exciteher]

You cannot change (your) personality. Life is what makes you a certain way. You can influence what happens in your life, though, which will then make you experience different, better, things, which COULD make you a better person if you react to them the 'right way'....

Life's what you make it and life's what forms you. Edit your life wisely, that's all you can do. Bad things may happen but that's not the issue: it's the way you deal with it.

This is all very well said!

What you said brought to mind the thought:
It is so ironic that we silly creatures can get caught up in shrinking from life because of the negative things that can and do happen. And we can begin fearing life and getting out there and living life, even more than we fear the inevitable bumps in the road, or even death itself!

That is why I think passion..for many things (not just for sex,etc..but all sorts of things) .. is so important. Keeps us moving ahead and can highlight the things we need to edit and gives us the perspective and energy to do that.

 

[M's girl]

This is all very well said!

Well, thank you!

You know.... fear and setbacks and all are there to overcome. They may be tests, I don't know. Some do believe that. I'm not religious. I do believe everyone has their challenges in life. What's regular stuff for one is a huge challenge for the next one. And that's okay... The only thing you can do is make the best of what you've got and you'll be fine.

 

[Exciteher]

.... They may be tests, I don't know. Some do believe that....

I'm not religious either, but what you said reminded me of the "Rules for being Human" from the book "If Life is a Game, These are the Rules" by Cherie Carter-Scott

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it's the only thing you are sure to keep for the rest of your life.

2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called "Life on Planet Earth". Every person or incident is the Universal Teacher.

3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of experimentation. "Failures" are as much a part of the process as "success."

4. A lesson is repeated until learned. It is presented to you in various forms until you learn it -- then you can go on to the next lesson.

5. If you don't learn easy lessons, they get harder. External problems are a precise reflection of your internal state. When you clear inner obstructions, your outside world changes. Pain is how the universe gets your attention.

6. You will know you've learned a lesson when your actions change. Wisdom is practice. A little of something is better than a lot of nothing.

7. "There" is no better than "here". When your "there" becomes a "here" you will simply obtain another "there" that again looks better than "here."

8. Others are only mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another unless it reflects something you love or hate in yourself.

9. Your life is up to you. Life provides the canvas; you do the painting. Take charge of your life -- or someone else will.

10. You always get what you want. Your subconscious rightfully determines what energies, experiences, and people you attract -- therefore, the only foolproof way to know what you want is to see what you have. There are no victims, only students.

11. There is no right or wrong, but there are consequences. Moralizing doesn't help. Judgments only hold the patterns in place. Just do your best.

12. Your answers lie inside you. Children need guidance from others; as we mature, we trust our hearts, where the Laws of Spirit are written. You know more than you have heard or read or been told. All you need to do is to look, listen, and trust.

13. You will forget all this.

14. You can remember any time you wish.

 

[M's girl]

That makes a lot of sense..... I must look fot that book

 

[Lovernotkiller]

yea

I'm probably gonna invest in the book as well.