JazzManJim
On the Downbeat
- Joined
- Sep 12, 2001
- Posts
- 27,360
Okay, so it wasn't the brightest idea I've ever had.
I coldn't sleep well last night, so to amuse myself, I read every post in the "Menstrual Hut" thread. It really seemed like a good idea at the time: get to know what women think about and say when they're being candid, learn an inner secret or three, add to what I already know.
Did I mention that this wasn't the brightest idea I've ever had?
I'm now very, very scared and confused by women. I thought I had a pretty good handle on them based on years of listening to what they had to say to me. Little did I know that they were only telling me....oh...less than a percent of what was going on in their heads?
Now, to their very estimable credit, the women hereabouts are some of the smartest, sexiest, wittiest women I've ever seen in my life. They're a huge reason I come back here day after day. There's no end ot true enjoyment I get from reading posts and getting to know them and just having fun or engaging in spirited debate. That's very fun!
But underneath it lurks a being I can't possibly fathom, even if I had a million years to do so. Not only can I not understand, I don't even apparently speak the same language! Based on what I read, I'm as capable of dealing with a woman on her level as a dog would be dealing with me on my level.
I'm outclassed, outgunned, outsmarted, and even if I could rally my brethren behind me, we're mere rabble to this highly-organized, apparently psychic, brutally ruthless, incredibly capable army of femininity.
This is not especially heartening to me at all. I'm humbled that I didn't know even a tenth of what I thought I did. I'm scared at how easily women see through our carefully-crafted ruses and our macho preening. Guys..we're not fooling them and even though they know it, they're not telling us. Apparently they think it's cute, like a hamster. Do we think we're sensitive? Hah! We're not. We're as sensitive at our best as a piece of granite. Yet we still will try and they'll still thank us for trying. Maybe that's worth it. Even so, we're doomed, fellas.
However, there are a couple brave men who go there regularly and...well...power to you. One day I'll dance at your Wake after you've been stabbed to death in there and tossed out bonelessly as an example to the rest of us.
So in conclusion, let me tell each and every one of you wonderful women. I love you dearly.
Please don't kill me.
I coldn't sleep well last night, so to amuse myself, I read every post in the "Menstrual Hut" thread. It really seemed like a good idea at the time: get to know what women think about and say when they're being candid, learn an inner secret or three, add to what I already know.
Did I mention that this wasn't the brightest idea I've ever had?
I'm now very, very scared and confused by women. I thought I had a pretty good handle on them based on years of listening to what they had to say to me. Little did I know that they were only telling me....oh...less than a percent of what was going on in their heads?
Now, to their very estimable credit, the women hereabouts are some of the smartest, sexiest, wittiest women I've ever seen in my life. They're a huge reason I come back here day after day. There's no end ot true enjoyment I get from reading posts and getting to know them and just having fun or engaging in spirited debate. That's very fun!
But underneath it lurks a being I can't possibly fathom, even if I had a million years to do so. Not only can I not understand, I don't even apparently speak the same language! Based on what I read, I'm as capable of dealing with a woman on her level as a dog would be dealing with me on my level.
I'm outclassed, outgunned, outsmarted, and even if I could rally my brethren behind me, we're mere rabble to this highly-organized, apparently psychic, brutally ruthless, incredibly capable army of femininity.
This is not especially heartening to me at all. I'm humbled that I didn't know even a tenth of what I thought I did. I'm scared at how easily women see through our carefully-crafted ruses and our macho preening. Guys..we're not fooling them and even though they know it, they're not telling us. Apparently they think it's cute, like a hamster. Do we think we're sensitive? Hah! We're not. We're as sensitive at our best as a piece of granite. Yet we still will try and they'll still thank us for trying. Maybe that's worth it. Even so, we're doomed, fellas.
However, there are a couple brave men who go there regularly and...well...power to you. One day I'll dance at your Wake after you've been stabbed to death in there and tossed out bonelessly as an example to the rest of us.
So in conclusion, let me tell each and every one of you wonderful women. I love you dearly.
Please don't kill me.
perks
