I warned you what would happen if things didn't pick up in here

[Bidin~Time]

Corny jokes!!!

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

 

[Shingen]

!!

Ahaha! You so funny!

What's green, two miles long, and has an asshole every two feet?

 

[Bidin~Time]

Signs you drink too much coffee

- You answer the door before people knock.
- Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
- You ski uphill.
- You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
- You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
- You lick your coffeepot clean.
- You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.
- Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
- You chew on other people's fingernails.
- Your T-shirt says, "Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend."
- You can type sixty words per minute ... with your feet.
- You can jump-start your car without cables.
- Cocaine is a downer.
- You don't need a hammer to pound nails.
- Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low."
- You don't sweat, you percolate.
- You buy 1/2 & 1/2 by the barrel.
- You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
- You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
- You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
- You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
- Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
- You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
- People get dizzy just watching you.
- You've worn the finish off your coffee table.
- The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
- Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
- Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
- Instant coffee takes too long.
- When someone says. "How are you?", you say, "Good to the last drop."
- You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
- Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
- You're offended when people use the word "brew" to mean beer.
- You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
- You can thread a sewing machine, while it's running.
- You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
- You short out motion detectors.
- You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
- Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
- You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.
- You don't tan, you roast.
- You can't even remember your second cup.
- You help your dog chase its tail.

 

[Bidin~Time]

Re: !!

Ahaha! You so funny!

What's green, two miles long, and has an asshole every two feet?

ty!!

now what green 2 miles long and has an asshole every 2 feet?

 

[Shingen]

Re: Re: !!

ty!!

now what green 2 miles long and has an asshole every 2 feet?

The St Patrick's Day parade, silly!

 

[Shingen]

A Dr says to his patient, "I've got some good news and some bad news."
"I'd better hear the good news first," says the patient.
"The good news is that your penis is going to be two inches longer and an inch wider," says the doctor.
"That's great!" Says the man. "So what's the bad news?"
"It's malignant."

 

[WynEternal]

Groan! Make the insantity stop! Please!

 

[Bidin~Time]

A Dr says to his patient, "I've got some good news and some bad news."
"I'd better hear the good news first," says the patient.
"The good news is that your penis is going to be two inches longer and an inch wider," says the doctor.
"That's great!" Says the man. "So what's the bad news?"
"It's malignant."

LOL



and now for my next selection:


Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank -- proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too.

 

[Bidin~Time]

Groan! Make the insantity stop! Please!

Now maybe the next time I threaten extreme action, folks will pay attention!


This thread kinda makes ya wish for Hanns, doesn't it??

 

[Shingen]

I wanna tell a really dirty joke...

 

[Bidin~Time]

I wanna tell a really dirty joke...

And you think I would stop you??

Go on tell it!!

 

[Shingen]

What do you do after you fuck bald pussy?

 

[Bidin~Time]

What do you do after you fuck bald pussy?

What do you do?

 

[Shingen]

Pm'd the answer to you!

 

[Shingen]

Q: What do you get when you put 32 West Virginia cheerleaders in one room?

 

[Bidin~Time]

A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces:










"I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."

 

[Shingen]

Q: What do you get when you put 32 West Virginia cheerleaders in one room?

A: A full set of teeth.

 

[Bidin~Time]

Q: What do you get when you put 32 West Virginia cheerleaders in one room?

is this a trick question??

 

[Shingen]

Q: Where does virgin wool come from?

























A: Ugly sheep.

 

[Bidin~Time]

more proof

A: A full set of teeth.

that the toothbrush was invented in West Virginia


Had it been invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush.

 

[Soblue]

Bahaha

I love corny jokes! You two are the best :-D

 

[Shingen]

Bahaha

I love corny jokes! You two are the best :-D

Okej, your turn to tell a joke! You can't post in here w/o telling us a joke!

 

[Bidin~Time]

Bahaha

I love corny jokes! You two are the best :-D

ty!




sad what a bored goddess will resort to, isn't it?

another bad one:



A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"
The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."

 

[Shingen]

It's a living

"I;ve found a great job," a man says to his wife. "A 10am start, a 6pm finish, no O/T, no w/e and it pays $2k a week in cash."
"That's unbelievable," says the wife.
"I know," says the husband, "You start Monday."

 

[Bidin~Time]

Okej, your turn to tell a joke! You can't post in here w/o telling us a joke!

yep this is right! you're turn!