Partners Past? What have you been told?

[Razzyricho]

I’m much the same as nostuff above. I don’t ever really ask people about their past, in any regards really.
We all have experiences that shape who we are and I’m not much interested in peoples pasts.
I live in the here and now, so I make my decisions on my friendships/connections, based on who you are and your actions in the present.

Judge nobody, keep your opinions discreet and focus on yourself is the only way roll I reckon! Shine bright all

 

[van_delay]

My gf actually showed me pictures of an exes dick.

Love this

 

[van_delay]

Love this

I'd love to see the cocks that have been in my wife.

 

[Greytruck]

I'd love to see the cocks that have been in my wife.

Oh me too.. love to see their dicks

 

[gisade]

I made the mistake of answering honestly when my husband asked for 'my number'. Sometimes white lies are good

 

[tnhardon]

I was a virgin (by choice) when I met my wife, she was not. If I went home and asked her for every detail, she is the type who would answer any question I had with probably brutal honesty (that’s just her personality). That said, we decided early in the relationship to not go into detail about our pasts. I knew, especially having virtually no experience of my own, that knowing all the things that she had experienced would get in my head.

The things I do know:
-Around the age she lost her virginity.
-She has been in and out of relationships pretty much since she lost her virginity.
-She had a long term relationship for a portion of college that she got engaged to but broke things off with.
-I am NOT the biggest she’s been with, and the certainty she has told me that with never ceases to hurt my ego.
-She’s done anal at some point, didn’t enjoy it, and has no interest in ever doing it again.
-I give better oral than most (if not all) the people she’s been with. First time I went down on her, she came and it blew her mind because that pretty much never happened to her from oral.
-We never went into numbers, but based on what I know about her dating history, her body count is probably around a dozen. I’d assume most of those are people she’s dated. Doesn’t seem like she did much casual stuff.

I certainly can appreciate that her experience helped her realize what she enjoyed sexually and saved me the awkwardness of having to learn to have sex with someone else who also didn’t know what they were doing. That said, I also struggle mentally with knowing she’s likely had better sex with someone else. We did have sex prior to getting engaged, so I at least know I’m good enough in bed that she was willing to be stuck with me . However, like I said, knowing many other guys have seen her naked, fucked her, cum in her, etc., is tough to sit with, especially considering I’d never shared that with another woman.

Definitely a weird dynamic, which is why I try to not think about it, if at all possible.

 

[tnhardon]

I made the mistake of answering honestly when my husband asked for 'my number'. Sometimes white lies are good

White lies definitely have their place. That type of question is certainly one most guys don’t want an honest answer to, especially if the number is high. It is right up there with the “Does this dress make me look fat?” question.

 

[gisade]

White lies definitely have their place. That type of question is certainly one most guys don’t want an honest answer to, especially if the number is high. It is right up there with the “Does this dress make me look fat?” question.

So true

 

[Deleted member 1655181]

Love the stories from the past.. never fails to excite me
Also old boyfriends contact wife on Facebook

Yes, she has a pic of her and three of her exes at recent class reunion.

 

[SapphicSnow]

I guess I am lucky because, with one exception, I knew all that was to know about my past girlfriends, not that I have had that many, because we were friends first. The one exception was an older woman I was with for two years. She didn't like taking about herself and I never pushed. I didn't know she was an ex-con with a long criminal record, but it wouldn't have mattered because I was happy with her. I only found out when she was arrested and sent back to prison for breaking her parole by getting a DUI and having a little weed on her.

 

[Tigersman]

I never asked my girlfriends about past boyfriends or lovers. I had one girlfriend who only said she had "dumped" two boyfriends because they were not going where she was. I took that to mean education or career wise. My lack of asking about this led me to break up with her because my career had suddenly gone in reverse. I walked away from the person who I thought was my soulmate.

 

[Veronica_Flora]

I can’t handle my husband’s past. He’s 8 years older than me and had serious relationships, one night stands and who knows what else. I heard enough at one point thanks to him and his sister. I’m good forever. I don’t want to hear it.

He wants to know everything about my past but there’s some stuff I don’t feel comfortable telling him. So I don’t.

 

[DickandDoof]

I understand exactly how you feel. My wife is also eight years older than I am and she readily admits to having been a slut before she met me. I didn’t want to hear her backstory, but that didn’t stop her from telling it. It’s been difficult to forget some of the things she told me. It casts a shadow over us like a giant bat. I didn’t have much of a backstory, but at least I had the good sense to keep my mouth shut.

I think you’re taking the right approach. You’re under no obligation to tell him the story of your past if it makes you uncomfortable. Although he’d probably be less bothered by it than you were with his past.