I just got a PM. How would you respond to this?

[superlittlegirl]

To paraphrase the PM that I posted previously,

This PM was inquiring about the reason that I do not reply to the sender's PMs. He was curious as to whether I'd talk to him if he were a lesbian. (Because I only talk to lesbians on the board, right? ) He stated that my lack of desire to communicate with him was in direct opposition to the gay and lesbian community's desire for tolerance. He went on to state that "they" are constantly telling straight folk to be openminded and accept the homosexual lifestyle. He asserted that by giving me "too much" tolerance, he had effectively caused me to shut him off. He then inferred from some unknown source, that I am in favor of lesbian separatism. He stated that he knows I don't owe men anything, but I seem to love to tease. In a rather wounded tone, he asked me to forgive him for attempting to make a "valid" point. Finally, he congratulated himself on his exercise of restraint in attempting to have an "intelligent" conversation with me without "mentioning my tits".


How's that?

 

[sunstruck]

How about, I was just trying to avoid hurting your feelings. Fuck off? Does that work?

 

[RastaPope]

I just got this PM.

What do you think?

How would you answer it, if at all?

(The sender's name has been omitted, to protect identity)

<LOL!>

 

[lobito]

generally we don't post IM's or PM's. It's kind of an unwritten rule around here. but I wouldn't respond to it anyway.

 

[Artemesia]

How about, I was just trying to avoid hurting your feelings. Fuck off? Does that work?

What she said.

 

[mike_mike02128]

Why bother.......DELETE

 

[freakygirl]

I think it's against the rules to post PM's.. even if you remove the name.

yep.. #4

4. You may not post personal information of other members or, for that matter, anyone else. We do not allow phone numbers, email addresses, private messages or quotes from private emails to be posted on the forum. This rule also covers real names, employment info, and any other personal information that we deem inappropriate.

can be found here

Forum Guidelines


atleast.. I assume this means to not post PM's

 

[Ezarc]

Try to tell them in a nice way that men aren't your thing. Other than that I would say that a pm is a private document and not to be used as posting fodder.

 

[LukkyKnight]

generally we don't post IM's or PM's. It's kind of an unwritten rule around here. but I wouldn't respond to it anyway.

I think with it properly santized it's not a violation of privacy, but I am full of... opinions.

Ignore. Somebody taking that tone is spoiling for a fight or any other reaction. Why fuel it?

 

[superlittlegirl]

generally we don't post IM's or PM's. It's kind of an unwritten rule around here. but I wouldn't respond to it anyway.

oops. I'll delete it. I thought that omitting the name would suffice.

 

[sunstruck]

Good point. I forgot about that.

 

[thumbs2_ca]

yup

What she said.

What she said : she said.

 

[RastaPope]

edited because I broke the rules, unthinkingly. I'm sorry....

Rephrase it and tell everyone again. No rules against that.

 

[superlittlegirl]

Re: Re: I just got a PM. How would you respond to this?

Rephrase it and tell everyone again. No rules against that.

Good idea. Will do.

 

[Laurel]

Re: Re: I just got a PM. How would you respond to this?

Rephrase it and tell everyone again. No rules against that.

Yeah, you can do that.

To answer the question...why does he assume that because you're openly sexual but don't like men, you're being a tease? I mean, if he was openly sexual but not interested in men, does that mean he's an asshole because he's leading on the gay men on the board?

 

[Lancecastor]

A post, a PM, a knock on the door, the phone rings.

Not answering is always an option, though there seems to be a societal expectation that we should answer and that if we don't it's rude.

I decided many years ago that if I don't feel like answering my door or telephone, I don't.

It doesn't mean I'm rude or angry or insensitive or mean, no matter what the person vying for my time might say or do in (non) response.

It's empowering.

Just like "No"... it's a wonderful word, one that is highly under-utilized in my view.


Cheers;

Lance

 

[superlittlegirl]

Re: A post, a PM, a knock on the door, the phone rings.

The PM was precipitated by the fact that after politely expressing my desire to not engage in discourse with this person, I simply stopped replying entirely. This PM was the last in an extraordinarily long series of PMs. I did say no in the beginning, though. I'm not much of a word-mincer.

Not answering is always an option, though there seems to be a societal expectation that we should answer and that if we don't it's rude.

I decided many years ago that if I don't feel like answering my door or telephone, I don't.

It doesn't mean I'm rude or angry or insensitive or mean, no matter what the person vying for my time might say or do in (non) response.

It's empowering.

Just like "No"... it's a wonderful word, one that is highly under-utilized in my view.


Cheers;

Lance

 

[lobito]

sometimes replying encourages the other person to continue to send PM's, if you don't wnat that, then the best thing is NOT respond at all. You will most likely be labeled a bitch, but if you can live with that from one person, then...

there's always the ignore button.

 

[Mischka]

Send him a link to this thread, if he won't see it already. That ought to end your contact with him, which sounds like a good thing.

 

[superlittlegirl]

I've been working on my image of bitchiness for a while now.

But I usually reply politely to all first PMs, even if I am just saying "I'm not in the mood to talk, ever." Except when i forget to reply because I'm busy. So if I have never ever replied to a PM, it's just because I'm a slacker and forgetful at times. I do usually try, at least once, to politely decline.

sometimes replying encourages the other person to continue to send PM's, if you don't wnat that, then the best thing is NOT respond at all. You will most likely be labeled a bitch, but if you can live with that from one person, then...

there's always the ignore button.

 

[WaxNWane]

I've been working on my image of bitchiness for a while now.

But I usually reply politely to all first PMs, even if I am just saying "I'm not in the mood to talk, ever." Except when i forget to reply because I'm busy. So if I have never ever replied to a PM, it's just because I'm a slacker and forgetful at times. I do usually try, at least once, to politely decline.

I always threaten firm spankings. Never seems to have the desired effect.

 

[Lancecastor]

I sometimes keep replying long after I should have stopped.

(Yeah like that's a big revelation.)

The neat thing about Ignore is you never see the PM's from the person you are ignoring.

Hmmm...I just realized I'm walking myself into a great pun..."Ignorlance is Bliss".

 

[BoobsNBrains]

Delete it and ignore him...do you have the option to put him on ignore, too? Maybe that would work...if he couldn't get it through his head after the first million times you told him no, fuck him...he's stupid.

 

[Aphrodisiac]

Don't respond at all ..

I get pms from certain men over and over again , asking the same thing or saying some thing they assume is clever when in reality is just plain stupid.

I do not respond to them , I don't care how many pms they send me... I am thinking they will get the hint sooner or later , they can not be that slow ..

 

[cumman]

Some people are just stupid. Your not and he is. Just tell him to stop or you will send me to beat his ass.